three men in a boat-第30节
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and very careful we were to see that it did boil。
We had made the tea； and were just settling down comfortably to drink it；
when George； with his cup half…way to his lips； paused and exclaimed：
〃What's that？〃
〃What's what？〃 asked Harris and I。
〃Why that！〃 said George； looking westward。
Harris and I followed his gaze； and saw； coming down towards us on the
sluggish current； a dog。 It was one of the quietest and peacefullest
dogs I have ever seen。 I never met a dog who seemed more contented …
more easy in its mind。 It was floating dreamily on its back； with its
four legs stuck up straight into the air。 It was what I should call a
full…bodied dog； with a well…developed chest。 On he came； serene；
dignified； and calm； until he was abreast of our boat； and there； among
the rushes； he eased up； and settled down cosily for the evening。
George said he didn't want any tea； and emptied his cup into the water。
Harris did not feel thirsty； either； and followed suit。 I had drunk half
mine； but I wished I had not。
I asked George if he thought I was likely to have typhoid。
He said： 〃Oh； no；〃 he thought I had a very good chance indeed of escaping
it。 Anyhow； I should know in about a fortnight； whether I had or had
not。
We went up the backwater to Wargrave。 It is a short cut； leading out of
the right…hand bank about half a mile above Marsh Lock； and is well worth
taking； being a pretty； shady little piece of stream； besides saving
nearly half a mile of distance。
Of course； its entrance is studded with posts and chains； and surrounded
with notice boards； menacing all kinds of torture； imprisonment； and
death to everyone who dares set scull upon its waters … I wonder some of
these riparian boors don't claim the air of the river and threaten
everyone with forty shillings fine who breathes it … but the posts and
chains a little skill will easily avoid； and as for the boards； you
might； if you have five minutes to spare； and there is nobody about； take
one or two of them down and throw them into the river。
Half…way up the backwater； we got out and lunched； and it was during this
lunch that George and I received rather a trying shock。
Harris received a shock； too； but I do not think Harris's shock could
have been anything like so bad as the shock that George and I had over
the business。
You see； it was in this way： we were sitting in a meadow； about ten yards
from the water's edge； and we had just settled down comfortably to feed。
Harris had the beefsteak pie between his knees； and was carving it； and
George and I were waiting with our plates ready。
〃Have you got a spoon there？〃 says Harris； 〃I want a spoon to help the
gravy with。〃
The hamper was close behind us； and George and I both turned round to
reach one out。 We were not five seconds getting it。 When we looked
round again； Harris and the pie were gone！
It was a wide； open field。 There was not a tree or a bit of hedge for
hundreds of yards。 He could not have tumbled into the river； because we
were on the water side of him； and he would have had to climb over us to
do it。
George and I gazed all about。 Then we gazed at each other。
〃Has he been snatched up to heaven？〃 I queried。
〃They'd hardly have taken the pie too；〃 said George。
There seemed weight in this objection； and we discarded the heavenly
theory。
〃I suppose the truth of the matter is；〃 suggested George； descending to
the commonplace and practicable； 〃that there has been an earthquake。〃
And then he added； with a touch of sadness in his voice： 〃I wish he
hadn't been carving that pie。〃
With a sigh； we turned our eyes once more towards the spot where Harris
and the pie had last been seen on earth； and there； as our blood froze in
our veins and our hair stood up on end； we saw Harris's head … and
nothing but his head … sticking bolt upright among the tall grass； the
face very red； and bearing upon it an expression of great indignation！
George was the first to recover。
〃Speak！〃 he cried； 〃and tell us whether you are alive or dead … and where
is the rest of you？〃
〃Oh； don't be a stupid ass！〃 said Harris's head。 〃I believe you did it
on purpose。〃
〃Did what？〃 exclaimed George and I。
〃 Why； put me to sit here … darn silly trick！ Here； catch hold of the
pie。〃
And out of the middle of the earth； as it seemed to us； rose the pie …
very much mixed up and damaged； and； after it； scrambled Harris …
tumbled； grubby； and wet。
He had been sitting； without knowing it； on the very verge of a small
gully； the long grass hiding it from view； and in leaning a little back
he had shot over； pie and all。
He said he had never felt so surprised in all his life； as when he first
felt himself going； without being able to conjecture in the slightest
what had happened。 He thought at first that the end of the world had
come。
Harris believes to this day that George and I planned it all beforehand。
Thus does unjust suspicion follow even the most blameless for； as the
poet says； 〃Who shall escape calumny？〃
Who； indeed！
CHAPTER XIV。
WARGRAVE。 … WAXWORKS。 … SONNING。 … OUR STEW。 … MONTMORENCY IS SARCASTIC。
… FIGHT BETWEEN MONTMORENCY AND THE TEA…KETTLE。 … GEORGE'S BANJO STUDIES。
… MEET WITH DISCOURAGEMENT。 … DIFFICULTIES IN THE WAY OF THE MUSICAL
AMATEUR。 … LEARNING TO PLAY THE BAGPIPES。 … HARRIS FEELS SAD AFTER
SUPPER。 … GEORGE AND I GO FOR A WALK。 … RETURN HUNGRY AND WET。 … THERE IS
A STRANGENESS ABOUT HARRIS。 … HARRIS AND THE SWANS； A REMARKABLE STORY。 …
HARRIS HAS A TROUBLED NIGHT。
WE caught a breeze； after lunch； which took us gently up past Wargrave
and Shiplake。 Mellowed in the drowsy sunlight of a summer's afternoon；
Wargrave； nestling where the river bends； makes a sweet old picture as
you pass it； and one that lingers long upon the retina of memory。
The 〃George and Dragon〃 at Wargrave boasts a sign； painted on the one
side by Leslie； R。A。； and on the other by Hodgson of that ilk。 Leslie
has depicted the fight； Hodgson has imagined the scene； 〃After the Fight〃
… George； the work done； enjoying his pint of beer。
Day； the author of SANDFORD AND MERTON； lived and … more credit to the
place still … was killed at Wargrave。 In the church is a memorial to
Mrs。 Sarah Hill； who bequeathed 1 pound annually； to be divided at
Easter； between two boys and two girls who 〃have never been undutiful to
their parents； who have never been known to swear or to tell untruths； to
steal； or to break windows。〃 Fancy giving up all that for five shillings
a year！ It is not worth it。
It is rumoured in the town that once； many years ago； a boy appeared who
really never had done these things … or at all events； which was all that
was required or could be expected； had never been known to do them … and
thus won the crown of glory。 He was exhibited for three weeks afterwards
in the Town Hall； under a glass case。
What has become of the money since no one knows。 They say it is always
handed over to the nearest wax…works show。
Shiplake is a pretty village； but it cannot be seen from the river； being
upon the hill。 Tennyson was married in Shiplake Church。
The river up to Sonning winds in and out through many islands； and is
very placid； hushed； and lonely。 Few folk； except at twilight； a pair or
two of rustic lovers； walk along its banks。 ‘Arry and Lord Fitznoodle
have been left behind at Henley； and dismal； dirty Reading is not yet
reached。 It is a part of the river in which to dream of bygone days； and
vanished forms and faces； and things that might have been； but are not；
confound them。
We got out at Sonning； and went for a walk round the village。 It is the
most fairy…like little nook on the whole river。 It is more like a stage
village than one built of bricks and mortar。 Every house is smothered in
roses； and now； in early June； they were bursting forth in clouds of
dainty splendour。 If you stop at Sonning； put up at the 〃Bull；〃 behind
the church。 It is a veritable picture of an old country inn； with green；
square courtyard in front； where； on seats beneath the trees； the old men
group of an evening to drink their ale and gossip over village politics；
with low； quaint rooms and latticed windows； and awkward stairs and
winding passages。
We roamed about sweet Sonning for an hour or so； and then； it being too
late to push on past Reading； we decided to go back to one of the
Shiplake islands； and put up there for the night。 It was still early
when we got settled； and George said that； as we had plenty of time； it
would be a splendid opportunity to try a good； slap…up supper。 He said
he would show us what could be done up the river in the way of cooking；
and suggested that； w
