three men in a boat-第3节
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a headache that afternoon。 It was the pickles; you know。 They were the
most disgraceful pickles I ever tasted in a respectable boat。 Did you
have any?〃
For myself; I have discovered an excellent preventive against sea…
sickness; in balancing myself。 You stand in the centre of the deck; and;
as the ship heaves and pitches; you move your body about; so as to keep
it always straight。 When the front of the ship rises; you lean forward;
till the deck almost touches your nose; and when its back end gets up;
you lean backwards。 This is all very well for an hour or two; but you
can't balance yourself for a week。
George said:
〃Let's go up the river。〃
He said we should have fresh air; exercise and quiet; the constant change
of scene would occupy our minds (including what there was of Harris's);
and the hard work would give us a good appetite; and make us sleep well。
Harris said he didn't think George ought to do anything that would have a
tendency to make him sleepier than he always was; as it might be
dangerous。
He said he didn't very well understand how George was going to sleep any
more than he did now; seeing that there were only twenty…four hours in
each day; summer and winter alike; but thought that if he DID sleep any
more; he might just as well be dead; and so save his board and lodging。
Harris said; however; that the river would suit him to a 〃T。〃 I don't
know what a 〃T〃 is (except a sixpenny one; which includes bread…and…
butter and cake AD LIB。; and is cheap at the price; if you haven't had
any dinner)。 It seems to suit everybody; however; which is greatly to
its credit。
It suited me to a 〃T〃 too; and Harris and I both said it was a good idea
of George's; and we said it in a tone that seemed to somehow imply that
we were surprised that George should have come out so sensible。
The only one who was not struck with the suggestion was Montmorency。 He
never did care for the river; did Montmorency。
〃It's all very well for you fellows;〃 he says; 〃you like it; but I don't。
There's nothing for me to do。 Scenery is not in my line; and I don't
smoke。 If I see a rat; you won't stop; and if I go to sleep; you get
fooling about with the boat; and slop me overboard。 If you ask me; I
call the whole thing bally foolishness。〃
We were three to one; however; and the motion was carried。
CHAPTER II。
PLANS DISCUSSED。 … PLEASURES OF 〃CAMPING…OUT;〃 ON FINE NIGHTS。 … DITTO;
WET NIGHTS。 … COMPROMISE DECIDED ON。 … MONTMORENCY; FIRST IMPRESSIONS OF。
… FEARS LEST HE IS TOO GOOD FOR THIS WORLD; FEARS SUBSEQUENTLY DISMISSED
AS GROUNDLESS。 … MEETING ADJOURNS。
WE pulled out the maps; and discussed plans。
We arranged to start on the following Saturday from Kingston。 Harris and
I would go down in the morning; and take the boat up to Chertsey; and
George; who would not be able to get away from the City till the
afternoon (George goes to sleep at a bank from ten to four each day;
except Saturdays; when they wake him up and put him outside at two);
would meet us there。
Should we 〃camp out〃 or sleep at inns?
George and I were for camping out。 We said it would be so wild and free;
so patriarchal like。
Slowly the golden memory of the dead sun fades from the hearts of the
cold; sad clouds。 Silent; like sorrowing children; the birds have ceased
their song; and only the moorhen's plaintive cry and the harsh croak of
the corncrake stirs the awed hush around the couch of waters; where the
dying day breathes out her last。
From the dim woods on either bank; Night's ghostly army; the grey
shadows; creep out with noiseless tread to chase away the lingering rear…
guard of the light; and pass; with noiseless; unseen feet; above the
waving river…grass; and through the sighing rushes; and Night; upon her
sombre throne; folds her black wings above the darkening world; and; from
her phantom palace; lit by the pale stars; reigns in stillness。
Then we run our little boat into some quiet nook; and the tent is
pitched; and the frugal supper cooked and eaten。 Then the big pipes are
filled and lighted; and the pleasant chat goes round in musical
undertone; while; in the pauses of our talk; the river; playing round the
boat; prattles strange old tales and secrets; sings low the old child's
song that it has sung so many thousand years … will sing so many thousand
years to come; before its voice grows harsh and old … a song that we; who
have learnt to love its changing face; who have so often nestled on its
yielding bosom; think; somehow; we understand; though we could not tell
you in mere words the story that we listen to。
And we sit there; by its margin; while the moon; who loves it too; stoops
down to kiss it with a sister's kiss; and throws her silver arms around
it clingingly; and we watch it as it flows; ever singing; ever
whispering; out to meet its king; the sea … till our voices die away in
silence; and the pipes go out … till we; common…place; everyday young men
enough; feel strangely full of thoughts; half sad; half sweet; and do not
care or want to speak … till we laugh; and; rising; knock the ashes from
our burnt…out pipes; and say 〃Good…night;〃 and; lulled by the lapping
water and the rustling trees; we fall asleep beneath the great; still
stars; and dream that the world is young again … young and sweet as she
used to be ere the centuries of fret and care had furrowed her fair face;
ere her children's sins and follies had made old her loving heart … sweet
as she was in those bygone days when; a new…made mother; she nursed us;
her children; upon her own deep breast … ere the wiles of painted
civilization had lured us away from her fond arms; and the poisoned
sneers of artificiality had made us ashamed of the simple life we led
with her; and the simple; stately home where mankind was born so many
thousands years ago。
Harris said:
〃How about when it rained?〃
You can never rouse Harris。 There is no poetry about Harris … no wild
yearning for the unattainable。 Harris never 〃weeps; he knows not why。〃
If Harris's eyes fill with tears; you can bet it is because Harris has
been eating raw onions; or has put too much Worcester over his chop。
If you were to stand at night by the sea…shore with Harris; and say:
〃Hark! do you not hear? Is it but the mermaids singing deep below the
waving waters; or sad spirits; chanting dirges for white corpses; held by
seaweed?〃 Harris would take you by the arm; and say:
〃I know what it is; old man; you've got a chill。 Now; you come along
with me。 I know a place round the corner here; where you can get a drop
of the finest Scotch whisky you ever tasted … put you right in less than
no time。〃
Harris always does know a place round the corner where you can get
something brilliant in the drinking line。 I believe that if you met
Harris up in Paradise (supposing such a thing likely); he would
immediately greet you with:
〃So glad you've come; old fellow; I've found a nice place round the
corner here; where you can get some really first…class nectar。〃
In the present instance; however; as regarded the camping out; his
practical view of the matter came as a very timely hint。 Camping out in
rainy weather is not pleasant。
It is evening。 You are wet through; and there is a good two inches of
water in the boat; and all the things are damp。 You find a place on the
banks that is not quite so puddly as other places you have seen; and you
land and lug out the tent; and two of you proceed to fix it。
It is soaked and heavy; and it flops about; and tumbles down on you; and
clings round your head and makes you mad。 The rain is pouring steadily
down all the time。 It is difficult enough to fix a tent in dry weather:
in wet; the task becomes herculean。 Instead of helping you; it seems to
you that the other man is simply playing the fool。 Just as you get your
side beautifully fixed; he gives it a hoist from his end; and spoils it
all。
〃Here! what are you up to?〃 you call out。
〃What are YOU up to?〃 he retorts; 〃leggo; can't you?〃
〃Don't pull it; you've got it all wrong; you stupid ass!〃 you shout。
〃No; I haven't;〃 he yells back; 〃let go your side!〃
〃I tell you you've got it all wrong!〃 you roar; wishing that you could
get at him; and you give your ropes a lug that pulls all his pegs out。
〃Ah; the bally idiot!〃 you hear him mutter to himself; and then comes a
savage haul; and away goes your side。 You lay down the mallet and start
to go round and tell him what you think about the whole business; and; at
the same time; he starts round in the same direction to come and explain
his views to you。 And you follow each other round and round; swearing at
one another; until the tent tumbles down in a heap; an