the stokesley secret-第34节

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〃No；　Hal；　I　shall　not　see；　I　shall　hear。〃

〃Shall　not　I　sail　with　you；　then；　Papa？〃

〃You　will　not　sail　at　all：　　I　thought　you　knew　that。〃

〃I　thought　the　Admiral　must　have　given　you　two　appointments；〃　said　Hal　timidly。

〃He　gave　me　ONE；　for　one　of　my　sons。　　The　first　choice　is　Sam's　right；　even　if　he　had　not　deserved　it　by　his　brave　patient　obedience。〃

Hal　hung　his　head；　then　said；　〃But；　Papa；　if　Sam　broke　down　in　his　examination；　please　mightn't　I〃

〃No；　Henry。　　Not　only　does　your　uncle　say　that　though　Sam's　success　is　very　doubtful；　your　inaccuracy　would　make　your　failure　certain；　but　if　your　knowledge　were　ever　so　well　up　to　the　mark；　I　could　not　put　you　into　the　navy。　　Left　to　yourself　here；　you　have　been　insubordinate；　vain；　weak；　shuffling：　　can　I　let　you　go　into　greater　temptation；　where　disgrace　would　be　public　and　without　remedy？〃

〃Oh；　but；　Papa！　　Papa！　　Away　from　the　Grevilles；　and　not　under　only　a　governess〃

〃You　shall　be　away　from　the　Grevilles；　and　not　under　a　governess。　Your　uncle　is　kind　enough　to　take　you　with　him　to　his　house；　and　will　endeavour　to　make　you　fit　to　try　to　get　upon　the　foundation　by　the　time　there　is　a　vacancy。〃

〃O　Papa！　don't；〃　sobbed　Henry。

〃I　can't　help　it；　Hal！　　You　have　shown　yourself　unfit　either　for　the　sea　or　for　home。　　What　can　I　do　with　you？〃

〃Try　meonly　try　me；　Papa。　　I　would〃

〃I　cannot　go　by　what　you　say　you　would　be；　but　what　you　are。　　Deeds；　not　words。〃

〃But　if　you　won't　let　me　go　into　the　navy；　only　let　me　be　in　real　school。〃

〃No；　Henry；　I　have　not　the　means　of　sending　you　there：　　excepting　on　the　foundation；　and　if　you　get　admittance　there　at　all；　it　will　only　be　by　great　diligence；　and　your　uncle's　kindness　in　preparing　you。〃

Henry　cried　bitterly。　　It　was　a　dreadful　prospect　to　do　his　lessons　alone　with　Uncle　John　in　the　boys'　play…hours；　and　be　kept　in　order　by　Aunt　Alice　when　his　uncle　was　in　school。　　Perhaps　his　father　would　not　have　liked　it　himself；　for　his　voice　was　very　pitying；　though　cheering；　as　he　said；　〃One　half　year；　Hal；　very　likely　no　more　if　you　take　pains；　and　you'll　get　into　school；　and　be　very　happy；　so　long　as　you　don't　make　a　Greville　of　every　idle　chap　you　meet。〃

Henry　cried　as　though　beyond　consolation。

〃I　hate　leaving　you　this　way；〃　continued　his　father；　〃but　by　the　time　I　come　home　you　will　see　it　was　the　best　thing　for　you；　and　look　up　to　Uncle　John　as　your　best　friend。　　Why；　Hal；　boy；　you'll　be　a　tall　fellow　of　fourteen！　　Let　me　find　you　godly　and　manly：　　you　can't　be　one　without　the　other。　　There　now；　good　night；　God　bless　you。〃

More　might　have　been　said　to　Henry　on　his　fault　and　what　had　led　to　it；　but　what　his　father　did　say　was　likely　to　sink　deeper　as　he　grew　older；　and　had　more　sense　and　feeling。

From　him　Captain　Merrifield　went　to　the　school…room；　where　Miss　Fosbrook　was　packing　up　for　the　little　girls；　and　putting　last　stitches　to　their　equipments；　with　hearty　good…will　and　kindness；　as　if　she　had　been　their　elder　sister。

He　thanked　her　most　warmly；　and　without　sending　away　the　girls；　who　were　both　busy　tacking　in　little　white　tuckers　to　the　evening　frocks；　he　began　to　settle　about　the　terms　on　which　she　was　to　remain　at　Stokesley。　　He　said　that　he　could　not　possibly　have　left　his　wife　without　a　person　on　whose　friendly　help　and　good　management　of　the　children　he　could　depend。　　Important　as　it　was　to　him　to　be　employed；　he　must　have　refused　the　appointment　if　Miss　Fosbrook　had　been　discontented；　or　had　not　had　the　children　so　well　in　hand。　　He　explained　that　he　had　reason　to　think　that　Mrs。　Merrifield's　present　illness　had　been　the　effect　of　all　she　had　gone　through　while　he　was　in　the　Black　Sea　during　the　Crimean　War。　　She　had　been　a　very　strong　person；　and　had　never　thought　of　sparing　herself；　but　she　and　all　her　little　children　had　had　to　get　into　Stokesley　in　his　absence；　she　had　to　manage　the　estate　and　farm；　teach　the　elder　children；　and　take　care　of　the　babies；　with　no　help　but　Nurse　Freeman's：　　and　though　he　had　been　wounded　when　with　the　Naval　Brigade；　and　had　been　at　death's　door　with　cholera；　the　effects　had　done　him　no　lasting　harm　at　all；　while　the　over…strain　of　the　anxiety　and　exertion　that　she　had　undergone　all　alone　had　so　told　upon　her；　that　she　had　never　been　well　since；　and　he　much　feared；　would　never　be　in　perfect　health　again。　　He　must　depend　upon　Miss　Fosbrook　for　watching　over　her　and　saving　her；　as　his　little　Susie　could　not　yet　do；　and　for　letting　him　know　from　time　to　time　how　she　was　going　on；　and　whether　he　ought　to　give　up　everything　and　come　home。

He　had　tears　in　his　eyes　as　he　thanked　Christabel　for　her　earnest　promise　to　watch　and　tend　Mrs。　Merrifield　with　a　daughter's　care；　and　her　heart　swelled　with　strong　deep　feeling　of　sorrow　and　sympathy　with　these　two　brave…hearted　loving　people；　doing　their　duty　at　all　costs　so　steadily；　and　she　was　full　of　gladness　and　thankfulness　that　they　could　treat　her　as　a　true　and　trusty　friend。　　He　walked　away；　feeling　far　too　much　to　bear　any　eye　upon　him；　and　Susan　was　found　to　be　crying　quietly；　making　her　thread　wet　through；　and　her　needle　squeak　at　every　stitch；　at　the　sad　news　that　Mamma　never　was　to　be　quite　well；　even　though　assured　that　she　was　likely　to　be　much　better　than　she　had　been　for　months　past。

Bessie　shed　no　tears；　but　Miss　Fosbrook；　who　had　been　hindered　all　day　by　Sam's　Euclid　and　Colenso；　and　had　sat　up　till　half…past　eleven　o'clock　to　make　the　two　Sunday　frocks　nice　enough　for　the　journey；　on　going　into　the　bed…room　to　lay　them　out　for　the　morning；　saw　a　little　face　raised　from　the　pillow　of　one　of　the　small　white　beds；　and　found　her　broad　awake。　　Bessie　never　could　go　to　sleep　properly　when　anything　out　of　the　common　way　was　coming　to　pass；　so　that　was　the　less　wonder；　but　she　had　a　great　deal　in　her　head；　and　she　was　glad　to　get　Christabel　to　kneel　down　by　her；　to　listen　to　her　whispers。

〃Dear　Christabel；　I　am　so　sorry。　　I　never　cared　about　it　before！〃

〃About　what；　my　dear？〃

〃What　Papa　said　about　when　he　was　in　the　Black　Sea。　　I　never　knew　Mamma　cared　so　much。〃

〃I　dare　say　not；　my　dear；　you　were　much　younger　then。〃

〃And　I　didn't　know　all　about　it；〃　said　Bessie；　〃or　else　I've　forgotten。　　I　have　been　trying　to　remember　whether　we　ever　thought　about　Mamma；　and　oh；　Christabel！　do　you　knowI　believe　we　only　thought　she　was　cross！　　Oh　dear！　it　was　so　naughty　and　bad　of　us！〃

〃I　can　guess　how　it　happened；　my　dear。　　You　were　not　old　enough　to　be　made　her　friends；　and　you　could　not　understand　quiet　sorrow。〃

〃To　think　we　should　have　said　she　was　cross！〃

〃That　was　wrong；　because　it　was　disrespectful。　　You　see；　my　dear；　when　grown　people　are　in　trouble；　you　young　ones　can't　enter　into　their　feelings；　nor　always　even　find　out　that　anything　is　amiss；　and　you　get　vexed　at　there　being　a　cloud　over　the　house；　and　call　it　crossness。〃

〃Grown…up　people　are　sometimes　cross；　aren't　they？〃　said　Bessie。　〃Nurse　is；　and　I　heard　Papa　say　Aunt　Alice　was。〃

〃We　have　tempers；　certainly；〃　said　Miss　Fosbrook；　〃and　unless　we　have　conquered　them　as　children；　there　will　be　signs　of　them　afterwards；　but　very　few　people；　and　certainly　no　children；　can　tell　when　grave　looks；　or　words　sharper　than　usual；　come　from　illness　or　anxiety　or　sorrow；　and　it　is　the　only　way　to　save　great　grief　and　self…reproach　to　give　one's　own　faults　the　blame；　and　try　to　be　as　unobtrusive　and　obliging　as　possible。〃

〃And　I　am　older　now；　and　can　understand；〃　said　Bessie；　〃but　then；　it　is　Susie　that　is　right　hand；　and　does　everything。〃

〃There's　plenty　in　your　own　line；　Bessieplenty　of　little　kindly　services　that　are　very　cheering；　and　above　all〃

〃What？〃

〃Attending　to　your　Mamma's　troubles　will　drive　away　your　own　grievances。　　Only　I　will　not　talk　to　you　any　more　now；　for　I　want　you　to　go　to　sleep；　if　you　lie　awake；　you　will　be　tired　to…morrow；　and　that　will　incline　you　to　be　fretful。〃

〃Fretful　to…morrow！〃

Bessie　could　not　believe　it　possible；　and　indeed　Miss　Fosbrook　did　not　think　the　chance　great；　as　long　as　there　was　amusement　and　excitement。　　The　danger　would　be　in　the　waitings　and　disappointments　that　will　often　occur；　even　in　the　height　of　enjoyable　schemes。

It　would　take　too　long　to　tell　of　all　the　good…byes。　　The　children　old　enough　to　enter　into　the　parting　were　setting　off　too；　and　Miss　Fosbrook　felt　more　for　the　little　ones　than　they　did　for　themselves；　as　they　watched　their　father　and　uncle　and　two　sisters　into　the　gig；　and　the　boys　into　the　cart；　with　Purday　to　drive　them　and　the　boxes；　Sam　sitting　on　his　father's　old　midshipman's　chest；　trying；　as　well　as　the　jolting　would　let　him；　to　con　over　that　troublesome　Thirty…　fifth　Proposition；　which　nine　times　repetition　to　Miss　Fosbrook　had　failed　to　put　into　his　head。

Johnnie　and　Annie　wished　themselves　going　to　sea；　or　to　London；　or　anywhere；　rather　than　having　the　full　force　of　Miss　Fosbrook　on　their　lessons！　　She　did　not　make　them　do　more；　but　she　took　the　opportunity　of　making　everything　be　done　thoroughly；　and；　as　they　thought；　bothered　them　frightfully　about　pronouncing　their　words　in　reading；　and　holding　their　pens　when　they　wrote。　　After　a　little　while；　however；　they　found　that　really　their　hands　were　much　less　tired；　and　their　lines　much　smoother　an