letters to his son, 1749-第8节
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'bon mot'; and the malicious applause with which it is commonly received; has made people who can say them; and; still oftener; people who think they can; but cannot; and yet try; more enemies; and implacable ones too; than any one other thing that I know of: When such things; then; shall happen to be said at your expense (as sometimes they certainly will); reflect seriously upon the sentiments of uneasiness; anger; and resentment which they excite in you; and consider whether it can be prudent; by the same means; to excite the same sentiments in others against you。 It is a decided folly to lose a friend for a jest; but; in my mind; it is not a much less degree of folly to make an enemy of an indifferent and neutral person; for the sake of a 'bon mot'。 When things of this kind happen to be said of you; the most prudent way is to seem not to suppose that they are meant at you; but to dissemble and conceal whatever degree of anger you may feel inwardly; but; should they be so plain that you cannot be supposed ignorant of their meaning; to join in the laugh of the company against yourself; acknowledge the hit to be a fair one; and the jest a good one; and play off the whole thing in seeming good humor; but by no means reply in the same way; which only shows that you are hurt; and publishes the victory which you might have concealed。 Should the thing said; indeed injure your honor or moral character; there is but one proper reply; which I hope you never will have occasion to make。
As the female part of the world has some influence; and often too much; over the male; your conduct with regard to women (I mean women of fashion; for I cannot suppose you capable of conversing with any others) deserves some share in your reflections。 They are a numerous and loquacious body: their hatred would be more prejudicial than their friendship can be advantageous to you。 A general complaisance and attention to that sex is therefore established by custom; and certainly necessary。 But where you would particularly please anyone; whose situation; interest; or connections; can be of use to you; you must show particular preference。 The least attentions please; the greatest charm them。 The innocent but pleasing flattery of their persons; however gross; is greedily swallowed and kindly digested: but a seeming regard for their understandings; a seeming desire of; and deference for; their advice; together with a seeming confidence in their moral virtues; turns their heads entirely in your favor。 Nothing shocks them so much as the least appearance of that contempt which they are apt to suspect men of entertaining of their capacities; and you may be very sure of gaining their friendship if you seem to think it worth gaining。 Here dissimulation is very often necessary; and even simulation sometimes allowable; which; as it pleases them; may; be useful to you; and is injurious to nobody。
This torn sheet; which I did not observe when I began upon it; as it alters the figure; shortens; too; the length of my letter。 It may very well afford it: my anxiety for you carries me insensibly to these lengths。 I am apt to flatter myself; that my experience; at the latter end of my life; may be of use to you at the beginning of yours; and I do not grudge the greatest trouble; if it can procure you the least advantage。 I even repeat frequently the same things; the better to imprint them on your young; and; I suppose; yet giddy mind; and I shall think that part of my time the best employed; that contributes to make you employ yours well。 God bless you; child!
LETTER LXXII
LONDON; June 16; O。 S。 1749。
DEAR BOY: I do not guess where this letter will find you; but I hope it will find you well: I direct it eventually to Laubach; from whence I suppose you have taken care to have your letters sent after you。 I received no account from Mr。 Harte by last post; and the mail due this day is not yet come in; so that my informations come down no lower than the 2d June; N。 S。; the date of Mr; Harte's last letter。 As I am now easy about your health; I am only curious about your motions; which I hope have been either to Inspruck or Verona; for I disapprove extremely of your proposed long and troublesome journey to Switzerland。 Wherever you may be; I recommend to you to get as much Italian as you can; before you go either to Rome or Naples: a little will be of great use to you upon the road; and the knowledge of the grammatical part; which you can easily acquire in two or three months; will not only facilitate your progress; but accelerate your perfection in that language; when you go to those places where it is generally spoken; as Naples; Rome; Florence; etc。
Should the state of your health not yet admit of your usual application to books; you may; in a great degree; and I hope you will; repair that loss by useful and instructive conversations with Mr。 Harte: you may; for example; desire him to give you in conversation the outlines; at least; of Mr。 Locke's logic; a general notion of ethics; and a verbal epitome of rhetoric; of all which Mr。 Harte will give you clearer ideas in half an hour; by word of mouth; than the books of most of the dull fellows who have written upon those subjects would do in a week。
I have waited so long for the post; which I hoped would come; that the post; which is just going out; obliges me to cut this letter short。 God bless you; my dear child! and restore you soon to perfect health!
My compliments to Mr。 Harte; to whose care your life is the least thing that you owe。
LETTER LXXIII
LONDON; June 22; O。 S。 1749。
DEAR BOY: The outside of your letter of the 7th N。 S。; directed by your own hand; gave me more pleasure than the inside of any other letter ever did。 I received it yesterday at the same time with one from Mr。 Harts of the 6th。 They arrived at a very proper time; for they found a consultation of physicians in my room; upon account of a fever which I had for four or five days; but which has now entirely left me。 As Mr。 Harte Says THAT YOUR LUNGS NOW AND THEN GIVE YOU A LITTLE PAIN; and that YOUR SWELLINGS COME AND GO VARIABLY; but as he mentions nothing of your coughing; spitting; or sweating; the doctors take it for granted that you are entirely free from those three bad symptoms: and from thence conclude; that; the pain which you sometimes feel upon your lungs is only symptomatical of your rheumatic disorder; from the pressure of the muscles which hinders the free play of the lungs。 But; however; as the lungs are a point of the utmost importance and delicacy; they insist upon your drinking; in all events; asses' milk twice a day; and goats' whey as often as you please; the oftener the better: in your common diet; they recommend an attention to pectorals; such as sago; barley; turnips; etc。 These rules are equally good in rheumatic as in consumptive cases; you will therefore; I hope; strictly observe them; for I take it for granted that you are above the silly likings or dislikings; in which silly people indulge their tastes; at the expense of their health。
I approve of your going to Venice; as much as I disapproved of your going to Switzerland。 I suppose that you are by this time arrived; and; in that supposition; I direct this letter there。 But if you should find the heat too great; or the water offensive; at this time of the year; I would have you go immediately to Verona; and stay there till the great heats are over; before you return to Venice。
The time which you will probably pass at Venice will allow you to make yourself master of that intricate and singular form of government; of which few of our travelers know anything。 Read; ask; and see everything that is relative to it。 There are likewise many valuable remains of the remotest antiquity; and many fine pieces of the Antico…moderno; all which deserve a different sort of attention from that which your countrymen commonly give them。 They go to see them; as they go to see the lions; and kings on horseback; at the Tower here; only to say that they have seen them。 You will; I am sure; view them in another light; you will consider them as you would a poem; to which indeed they are akin。 You will observe whether the sculptor has animated his stone; or the painter his canvas; into the just expression of those sentiments and passions which should characterize and mark their several figures。 You will examine; likewise; whether in their groups there be a unity of action; or proper relation; a truth of dress and manners。 Sculpture and painting are very justly called liberal arts; a lively and strong imagination; together with a just observation; being absolutely necessary to excel in either; which; in my opinion; is by no means the case of music; though called a liberal art; and now in Italy placed even above the other two; a proof of the decline of that country。 The Venetian school produced many great painters; such as Paul Veronese; Titian; Palma; etc。; of whom you will see; as well in private houses as in churches; very fine pieces。 The Last Supper; of Paul Veronese; in the church of St。 George; is reckoned his capital performance; and deserves your attention; as does also the famous picture of the Cornaro Family; by Titian。 A tast