lady baltimore-第28节

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As　soon　as　I　entered　the　Exchange　I　planted　myself　in　front　of　the　counter；　in　spite　of　the　discouragement　which　I　too　plainly　perceived　in　her　countenance；　the　unfavorable　impression　which　I　had　made　upon　her　at　our　last　interview　was　still　in　force。

I　plunged　into　it　at　once。　〃I　have　a　confession　to　make。〃

〃You　do　me　surprising　honor。〃

〃Oh；　now；　don't　begin　like　that！　I　suppose　you　never　told　a　lie。〃

〃I'm　telling　the　truth　now　when　I　say　that　I　do　not　see　why　an　entire　stranger　should　confess　anything　to　me。〃

〃Oh；　my　goodness！　Well；　I　told　you　a　lie；　anyhow；　a　great；　successful；　deplorable　lie。〃

She　opened　her　mouth　under　the　shock　of　it；　and　I　recited　to　her　unsparingly　my　deception；　during　this　recital　her　mouth　gradually　closed。

〃Well；　I　declare；　declare；　declare！〃　she　slowly　and　deliciously　breathed　over　the　sum　total；　and　she　considered　me　at　length；　silently；　before　her　words　came　again；　like　a　soft　soliloquy。　〃I　could　never　have　believed　it　in　one　who〃here　gayety　flashed　in　her　eyes　suddenly〃parts　his　back　hair　so　rigidly。　Oh；　I　beg　your　pardon　for　being　personal！〃　And　her　gayety　broke　in　ripples。　Some　habitual　instinct　moved　me　to　turn　to　the　looking…glass。　〃Useless！〃　she　cried；　〃you　can't　see　it　in　that。　But　it's　perfectly　splendid　to…day。〃

Nature　has　been　kind　to　me　in　many　waysnay；　prodigal；　it　is　not　every　man　who　can　perceive　the　humor　in　a　jest　of　which　he　is　himself　the　subject。　I　laughed　with　her。　〃I　trust　that　I　am　forgiven；〃　I　said。

〃Oh；　yes；　you　are　forgiven！　Come　out；　General；　and　give　the　gentleman　your　right　paw；　and　tell　him　that　he　is　forgivenif　only　for　the　sake　of　Daddy　Ben。〃　With　these　latter　words　she　gave　me　a　gracious　nod　of　understanding。　They　were　all　thanking　me　for　the　kettle…supporter！　She　probably　knew　also　the　tale　of　John　Mayrant；　the　cards；　and　the　bedside。

The　curly　dog　came　out；　and　went　through　his　part　very　graciously。

〃I　can　guess　his　last　name；〃　I　remarked。

〃General's？　How？　Oh；　you've　heard　it！　I　don't　believe　in　you　any　more。〃

〃That's　not　a　bit　handsome；　after　my　confession。　No；　I'm　getting　to　understand　South　Carolina　a　little。　You　came　from　the　'up…country；'　you　call　your　dog　General；　his　name　is　General　Hampton！〃

Her　laughter　assented。　〃Tell　me　some　more　about　South　Carolina；〃　she　added　with　her　caressing　insinuation。

〃Well；　to　begin　with〃

〃Go　sit　down　at　your　lunch…table　first。　Aunt　Josephine　would　never　tolerate　my　encouraging　gentlemen　to　talk　to　me　over　the　counter。〃

I　went　back　obediently；　and　then　resumed：　〃Well；　what　sort　of　people　are　those　who　own　the　handsome　garden　behind　Mrs。　Trevise's！〃

〃I　don't　know　them。〃

〃Thank　you；　that's　all　I　wanted。〃

〃What　do　you　mean？〃

〃They're　new　people。　I　could　tell　it　from　the　way　you　stuck　your　nose　in　the　air。〃

〃Sir！〃

〃Oh；　if　you　talk　about　my　hair；　I　can　talk　about　your　nose；　I　think。　I　suspected　that　they　were：　'new　people'　because　they　cleaned　up　their　garden　immediately　after　the　storm　this　morning。　Now；　I'll　tell　you　something　else：　the　whole　South　looks　down　on　the　whole　North。〃

She　made　her　voice　kind。　〃Do　you　mind　it　very　much？〃

I　joined　in　her　latent　mirth。　〃It　makes　life　not　worth　living！　But　more　than　this；　South　Carolina　looks　down　on　the　whole　South。〃

〃Not　Virginia。〃

〃Not？　An　'entire　stranger；'　you　know；　sometimes　notices　things　which　escape　the　family　eyefamily　likenesses　in　the　children；　for　instance。〃

〃Never　Virginia；〃　she　persisted。

〃Very　well；　very　well！　Somehow　you've　admitted　the　rest；　however。〃

She　began　to　smile。

〃And　next；　Kings　Port　looks　down　on　all　the　rest　of　South　Carolina。〃

She　now　laughed　outright。　〃An　up…country　girl　will　not　deny　that；　anyhow！〃

〃And　finally；　your　aunts〃

〃My　aunts　are　Kings　Port。〃

〃The　whole　of　it？〃

〃If　you　mean　the　thirty　thousand　negroes〃

〃No；　there　are　other　white　people　herethere　goes　your　nose　again！〃

〃I　will　not　have　you　so　impudent；　sir！〃

〃A　thousand　pardons；　I'm　on　my　knees。　But　your　aunts〃　There　was　such　a　flash　of　war　in　her　eye　that　I　stopped。

〃May　I　not　even　mention　them？〃　I　asked　her。

And　suddenly　upon　this　she　became　serious　and　gentle。　〃I　thought　that　you　understood　them。　Would　you　take　them　from　their　seclusion；　too？　It　is　all　they　have　leftsince　you　burned　the　rest　in　1865。〃

I　had　made　her　say　what　I　wanted！　That　〃you〃　was　what　I　wanted。　Now　I　should　presently　have　it　out　with　her。　But；　for　the　moment；　I　did　not　disclaim　the　〃you。〃　I　said：

〃The　burning　in　1865　was　horrible；　but　it　was　war。〃

〃It　was　outrage。〃

〃Yes；　the　same　kind　as　England's；　who　burned　Washington　in　1812；　and　whom　you　all　so　deeply　admire。〃

She　had；　it　seemed；　no　answer　to　this。　But　we　trembled　on　the　verge　of　a　real　quarrel。　It　was　in　her　voice　when　she　said：

〃I　think　I　interrupted　you。〃

I　pushed　the　risk　one　step　nearer　the　verge；　because　of　the　words　I　wished　finally　to　reach。　〃In　1812；　when　England　burned　our　White　House　down；　we　did　not　sit　in　the　ashes；　we　set　about　rebuilding。〃

And　now　she　burst　out。　〃That's　not　fair；　that's　perfectly　inexcusable！　Did　England　then　set　loose　on　us　a　pack　of　black　savages　and　politicians　to　help　us　rebuild？　Why；　this　very　day　I　cannot　walk　on　the　other　side　of　the　river；　I　dare　not　venture　off　the　New　Bridge；　and　you　who　first　beat　us　and　then　unleashed　the　blacks　to　riot　in　a　new　'equality'　that　they　were　no　more　fit　for　than　so　many　apes；　you　sat　back　at　ease　in　your　victory　and　your　progress；　having　handed　the　vote　to　the　negro　as　you　might　have　handed　a　kerosene　lamp　to　a　child　of　three；　and　let　us　crushed；　breathless　people　cope　with　the　chaos　and　destruction　that　never　came　near　you。　Why；　how　can　you　dare〃　Once　again；　admirably　she　pulled　herself　up　as　she　had　done　when　she　spoke　of　the　President。　〃I　mustn't！〃　she　declared；　half　whispering；　and　then　more　clearly　and　calmly；　〃I　mustn't。〃　And　she　shook　her　head　as　if　shaking　something　off。　〃Nor　must　you；〃　she　finished；　charmingly　and　quietly；　with　a　smile。

〃I　will　not；〃　I　assured　her。　She　was　truly　noble。

〃But　I　did　think　that　you　understood　us；〃　she　said　pensively。

〃Miss　La　Heu；　when　you　talked　to　me　about　the　President　and　the　White　House；　I　said　that　you　were　hard　to　answer。　Do　you　remember？〃

〃Perfectly。　I　said　I　was　glad　you　found　me　so。'

〃You　helped　me　to　understand　you　then；　and　now　I　want　to　be　helped　to　further　understanding。　Last　night　I　heard　the　'Ode　for　the　Daughters　of　Dixie。'　I　had　a　bad　time　listening　to　that。〃

〃Do　you　presume　to　criticise　it？　Do　we　criticise　your　Grand　Army　reunions；　and　your　'Marching　through　Georgia；'　and　your　'John　Brown's　Body；'　and　your　Arlington　Museum？　Can　we　not　be　allowed　to　celebrate　our　heroes　and　our　glories　and　sing　our　songs？〃

She　had　helped　me　already！　Still；　still；　the　something　I　was　groping　for；　the　something　which　had　given　me　such　pain　during　the　ode；　remained　undissolved；　remained　unanalyzed　between　us；　I　still　had　to　have　it　out　with　her；　and　the　point　was　that　it　had　to　be　with　her；　and　not　simply　with　myself　alone。　We　must　thrash　out　together　the　way　to　an　understanding；　an　agreement　was　not　in　the　least　necessarywe　could　agree　to　differ；　for　that　matter；　with　perfect　cordialitybut　an　understanding　we　must　reach。　And　as　I　was　thinking　this　my　light　increased；　and　I　saw　clearly　the　ultimate　thing　which　lay　at　the　bottom　of　my　own　feeling；　and　which　had　been　strangely　confusing　me　all　along。　This　discovery　was　the　key　to　the　whole　remainder　of　my　talk；　I　never　let　go　of　it。　The　first　thing　it　opened　for　me　was　that　Eliza　La　Heu　didn't　understand　me；　which　was　quite　natural；　since　I　had　only　just　this　moment　become　clear　to　myself。

〃Many　of　us；〃　I　began；　〃who　have　watched　the　soiling　touch　of　politics　make　dirty　one　clean　thing　after　another；　would　not　be　wholly　desolated　to　learn　that　the　Grand　Army　of　the　Republic　had　gone　to　another　world　to　sing　its　songs　and　draw　its　pensions。〃

She　looked　astonished；　and　then　she　laughed。　Down　in　the　South　here　she　was　too　far　away　to　feel　the　vile　uses　to　which　present　politics　had　turned　past　heroism

〃But；〃　I　continued；　〃we　haven't　any　Daughters　of　the　Union　banded　together　and　handing　it　down。〃

〃It？〃　she　echoed。　〃Well；　if　the　deeds　of　your　heroes　are　not　a　sacred　trust　to　you；　don't　invite　us；　please；　to　resemble　you。〃

I　waited　for　more；　and　a　little　more　came。

〃We　consider　Northerners　foreigners；　you　know。〃

Again　I　felt　that　hurt　which　hearing　the　ode　had　given　me；　but　I　now　knew　how　I　was　going　to　take　it；　and　where　we　were　presently　coming　out；　and　I　knew　she　didn't　mean　quite　all　thatdidn't　mean　it　every　day；　at　least　and　that　my　speech　had　driven　her　to　saying　it。

〃No；　Miss　La　Heu；　you　don't　consider　Northerners；　who　understand　you；　to　be　foreigners。〃

〃We　have　never　met　any　of　that　sort。〃

（〃Yes；〃　I　thought；　〃but　you　really　want　to。　Didn't　you　say　you　hoped　I　was　one？　Away　down　deep　there's　a　cry　of　kinship　in　you；　and　that　you　don't　hear　it；　and　that　we　don't　hear　it；　has　been　as　much　our　fault　as　yours。　I　see　that　very　well　now；　but　I'm　afraid　to　tell　you　so；　yet。〃）

What　I　said　was：　〃We're　handing　the　'sacred　trust'　down；　I　hope。〃

〃I　understood　you　to　say　you　weren't。〃

〃I　said　we　were　not　handing　'it'　down。〃

I　didn