the choir invisible-第28节

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〃And　thus　it　passed　on　from　Candlemass　until　after　Easter　that　the　month　of　May　was　come；　when　every　lusty　heart　beginneth　to　blossom　and　to　bring　forth　fruit；　for　like　as　herbs　and　trees　bring　forth　fruit　and　flourish　in　May；　in　likewise；　every　lusty　heart　that　is　any　manner　a　lover　springeth　and　flourisheth　in　lusty　deeds。　For　it　giveth　unto　all　lovers　couragethat　lusty　month　of　Mayin　something　to　constrain　him　to　some　manner　of　thing　more　in　that　month　than　in　any　other　month。　For　diverse　causes：　For　then　all　herbs　and　trees　renew　a　man　and　woman；　and；　in　likewise；　lovers　call　again　to　their　mind　old　gentleness　and　old　service　and　many　kind　deeds　that　were　forgotten　by　negligence。　For　like　as　winter　rasure　doth　always　erase　and　deface　green　summer；　so　fareth　it　by　unstable　love　in　man　and　woman。　For　in　many　persons　there　is　no　stability；。。。for　a　little　blast　of　winter's　rasure；　anon　we　shall　deface　and　lay　apart　true　love　（for　little　or　naught）；　that　cost　so　much。　This　is　no　wisdom　nor　stability；　but　it　is　feebleness　of　nature　and　great　disworship　whomever　useth　this。　Therefore　like　as　May　month　flowereth　and　flourisheth　in　many　gardens；　so　in　likewise　let　every　man　of　worship　flourish　his　heart　in　this　world：　first　unto　God；　and　next　unto　the　joy　of　them　that　he　promised　his　faith　unto；　for　there　was　never　worshipful　man　nor　worshipful　woman　but　they　loved　one　better　than　the　other。　And　worship　in　arms　may　never　be　foiled；　but　first　reserve　the　honour　to　God；　and　secondly　the　quarrel　must　come　of　thy　lady；　and　such　love　I　call　virtuous　love。　But　nowsdays　men　cannot　love　seven　nights　but　they　must　have　all　their　desires。。。　Right　so　fareth　love　nowadays；　soon　hot；　soon　cold：　this　is　no　stability。　But　the　old　love　was　not　so。　Men　and　women　could　love　together　seven　years。。。and　then　was　love　truth　and　faithfulness。　And　lo！　In　likewise　was　used　love　in　King　Arthur's　days。　Wherefore　I　liken　love　nowadays　unto　summer　and　winter；　for　like　the　one　is　hot　and　the　other　cold；　so　fareth　love　nowadays。〃。。。。。。。

He　laid　the　book　aside　upon　the　grass；　sat　up；　and　mournfully　looked　about　him。　Effort　was　usually　needed　to　withdraw　his　mind　from　those　low…down　shadowy　centuries　over　into　which　of　late　by　means　of　the　book；　as　by　means　of　a　bridge　spanning　a　known　and　an　unknown　land；　he　had　crossed；　and　wonder…stricken　had　wandered；　but　these　words　brought　him　swiftly　home　to　the　country　of　his　own　sorrow。　Unstable　love！　feebleness　of　nature！　one　blast　of　a　cutting　winter　wind　and　lo！　green　summer　defaced：　the　very　phrases　seemed　shaped　by　living　lips　close　to　the　ear　of　his　experience。　　It　was　in　this　spot　a　few　weeks　ago　that　he　had　planned　his　future　with　Amy：　these　were　the　acres　he　would　buy；　on　this　hill…top　he　would　build；　here；　home…sheltered；　wife…anchored；　the　warfare　of　his　flesh　and　spirit　ended；　he　could　begin　to　put　forth　all　his　strength　upon　the　living　of　his　life。　Had　any　frost　ever　killed　the　bud　of　nature's　hope　more　unexpectedly　than　this　landscape　now　lay　blackened　before　him？　　And　had　any　summer　ever　cost　so　much？　What　could　strike　a　man　as　a　more　mortal　wound　than　to　lose　the　woman　he　had　loved　and　in　losing　her　see　her　lose　her　loveliness？　As　the　end　of　it　all；　he　now　found　himself　sitting　on　the　blasted　rock　of　his　dreams　in　the　depths　of　the　greening　woods。　He　was　well　again　by　this　time　and　conscious　of　that　retightened　grasp　upon　health　and　redder　stir　of　life　with　which　the　great　Mother…nurse；　if　she　but　dearly　love　a　man；　will　tend　him　and　mend　him　and　set　him　on　his　feet　again　from　a　bed　of　wounds　or　sickness。　It　had　happened　to　him　also　that　with　this　reflushing　of　his　blood　there　had　reached　him　the　voice　of　Summer　advancing　northward　to　all　things　and　making　all　things　common　in　their　awakening　and　their　aim。

He　knew　of　old　the　pipe　of　this　imperious　Shepherd；　sounding　along　the　inner　vales　of　his　being；　herding　him　toward　universal　fellowship　with　seeding　grass　and　breeding　herb　and　every　heart…holding　creature　of　the　woods。　He　perfectly　recognized　the　sway　of　the　thrilling　pipe；　he　perfectly　realized　the　joy　of　the　jubilant　fellowship。　And　it　was　with　eyes　the　more　mournful　therefore　that　he　gazed　in　purity　about　him　at　the　universal　miracle　of　old　life　passing　into　new　life；　at　the　divinely　appointed　and　divinely　fulfilled　succession　of　forms；　at　the　unrent　mantle　of　the　generations　being　visibly　woven　around　him　under　the　golden　goads　of　the　sun。　〃　。。。for　like　as　herbs　bring　forth　fruit　and　flourish　in　May；　in　likewise；　every　heart　that　is　in　any　manner　a　lover　spingeth　and　flourisheth　in　lusty　deeds。〃　。　。　。　But　all　this　must　come；　must　spend　itself；　must　pass　him　by；　as　a　flaming　pageant　dies　away　from　a　beholder　who　is　forbidden　to　kindle　his　own　torch　and　claim　his　share　of　its　innocent　revels。　He　too　had　laid　his　plans　to　celebrate　his　marriage　at　the　full　tide　of　the　Earth's　joy；　and　these　plans　had　failed　him。

But　while　the　school…master　thus　was　gloomily　contemplating　the　end　of　his　relationship　with　Amy　and　her　final　removal　from　the　future　of　his　life；　in　reality　another　and　larger　trouble　was　looming　close　ahead。　A　second　landscape　had　begun　to　beckon　not　like　his　poor　little　frost…killed　field；　not　of　the　earth　at　all；　but　lifted　unattainable　into　the　air；　faint；　clear；　elusivethe　marriage　of　another　woman。　And　how　different　she！　He　felt　sure　that　no　winter's　rasure　would　ever　reach　that　land；　no　instability；　no　feebleness　of　nature　awaited　him　there；　the　loveliness　of　its　summer；　now　brooding　at　flood；　would　brood　unharmed　upon　it　to　the　natural　end。

He　buried　his　face　guiltily　in　his　hands　as　he　tried　to　shut　out　the　remembrance　of　how　persistently　of　late；　whithersoever　he　had　turned；　this　second　image　had　reappeared　before　him；　growing　always　clearer；　drawing　always　nearer；　summoning　him　more　luringly。　Already　he　had　begun　to　know　the　sensations　of　a　traveller　who　is　crossing　sands　with　a　parched　tongue　and　a　weary　foot；　crossing　toward　a　country　that　he　will　never　reach；　but　that　he　will　stagger　toward　as　long　as　he　has　strength　to　stand。　During　the　past　several　daysfollowing　his　last　interview　with　Amyhe　had　realized　for　the　first　time　how　long　and　how　plainly　the　figure　of　Mrs。　Falconer　had　been　standing　before　him　and　upon　how　much　loftier　a　level。　Many　a　time　of　old；　while　visiting　the　house；　he　had　grown　tired　of　Amy；　but　he　had　never　felt　wearied　by　her。　For　Amy　he　was　always　making　apologies　to　his　own　conscience；　she　needed　none。　He　had　secretly　hoped　that　in　time　Amy　would　become　more　what　he　wished　his　wife　to　be；　it　would　have　pained　him　to　think　of　her　as　altered。　Often　he　had　left　Amy's　company　with　a　grateful　sense　of　regaining　the　larger　liberty　of　his　own　mind；　by　her　he　always　felt　guided　to　his　better　self；　he　carried　away　her　ideas　with　the　hope　of　making　them　his　ideas；　he　was　set　on　fire　with　a　spiritual　passion　to　do　his　utmost　in　the　higher　strife　of　the　world。

For　this　he　had　long　paid　her　the　guiltless　tribute　of　his　reverence　and　affection。　And　between　his　reverence　and　affection　and　all　the　forbidden　that　lay　beyond　rose　a　barrier　which　not　even　his　imagination　had　ever　consciously　overleaped。　Now　the　forbidding　barrier　had　disappeared；　and　in　its　place　had　appeared　the　forbidden　bondhe　knew　not　how　or　when。　How　could　he？　Love；　the　Scarlet　Spider；　will　in　a　night　hang　between　two　that　have　been　apart　a　web　too　fine　for　either　to　see；　but　the　strength　of　both　will　never　avail　to　break　it。

Very　curiously　it　had　befallen　him　furthermore　that　just　at　the　time　when　all　these　changes　were　taking　place　around　him　and　within　him；　she　had　brought　him　the　book　that　she　had　pressed　with　emphasis　upon　his　attention。　In　the　backwoods　settlements　of　Pennsylvania　where　his　maternal　Scotch…Irish　ancestors　had　settled　and　his　own　life　been　spent；　very　few　volumes　had　fallen　into　his　hands。　After　coming　to　Kentucky　not　many　more　until　of　late：　so　that　of　the　world's　history　he　was　still　a　stinted　and　hungry　student。　When；therefore；　she　had　given　him　Malory's　〃LeMorte　D'Arthur；〃　it　was　the　first　time　that　the　ideals　of　chivalry　had　ever　flashed　their　glorious　light　upon　him；　for　the　first　time　the　models　of　Christian　manhood；　on　which　western　Europe　nourished　itself　for　centuries；　displayed　themselves　to　his　imagination　with　the　charm　of　story；　he　heard　of　Camelot；　of　the　king；　of　that　company　of　men　who　strove　with　each　other　in　arms；　but　strove　also　with　each　other　in　grace　of　life　and　for　the　immortal　mysteries　of　the　spirit。　She　had　said　that　he　should　have　read　this　book　long　before　but　that　henceforth　he　would　always　need　it　even　more　than　in　his　past：　that　here　were　some　things　he　had　looked　for　in　the　world　and　had　never　found；　characters　such　as　he　had　always　wished　to　grapple　to　himself　as　his　abiding　comrades：　that　if　he　would　love　the　best　that　it　loved；　hate　what　it　hated；　scorn　what　it　scorned；　it　would　help　him　in　the　pursuit　of　his　own　ideals　to　the　end。　Of　this　and　more　he　felt　at　once　the　truth；　since　of　all　earthly　books　known　to　him　this　contained　the　most　heavenly　revelation　of　what　a　man　may　be　in　manliness；　in　gentleness；　and　in　goodness。　　And　as　he　read　the　nobler　portions　of　the　book；　the　nobler　parts　of　his　nature　gave　out　their　immediate　response