phyllis of philistia-第48节
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〃You are a king of men； Bertie。 Only for the king of men is such a crown。〃
She laughed as she stood looking at him as she leaned against the half open door of the window； one hand being on the framework above her head。
〃Ella； you know her！〃 he cried； facing her。 She began to swing gently to the extent of an inch or two； still leaning on the edge of the hinged window。 She was looking at him through half…closed； curious eyes。 〃Ella； you know hershe has always been your friend； tell me if I should speak to her or if I should go back to the work that I have begun in New Guinea。〃
〃Would you be guided by me； Bertie？〃 she asked； suddenly ceasing her movement with the window and going very close to him indeedso close that he could feel the gracious warmth of her face and bare neck and shoulders。 〃Would you be guided by me； I wonder？〃
〃Have I not been guided by you up to the present； Ella？〃 said he。 〃Should I be here to…night if it were not for your goodness？ I laughed some time agohow long ago it seems！when you told meyou said it was your dearest wishI did not then believe it possible〃
〃And do you fancy that I believed it possible？〃 she asked； with some sadness in her voice。
〃Great Heavens！ Ella； do you mean to tell me that you Oh； no； it is impossible！ You knew me。〃
〃I fancied that I knew you； Bertie。 I fancied that I knew myself。〃
〃Ella； Ella； for God's sake don't let us drift again。 Have you no recollection of that terrible time through which we both passedthat ordeal by fire。 Ella； we were plucked from the fireshe plucked us from the very fire of hell itselfoh； don't let us drift in that direction again！〃
He had walked away from her。 He was beginning to recall too vividly the old days； under the influence of her gracious presence so close to himnot so close as it had been； but still close enough to bring back old memories。
〃Come here and stand beside me； Bertie；〃 said she。
After a moment's hesitation he went to her； slowly； not with the rapture of a lovernot with the old passion trembling in his hands； on his lips。
He went to her。
She put her hands behind her and looked at him in the face for a long time。 The even…songs of the birds mixed with the scent of the roses； the blue shadow of the twilight was darkening over the trees at the foot of her garden。
〃Do you remember the oleanders？〃 she said。 〃I never breathe in such a twilight as this without seeing before me the oleanders outlined against its blue。 It was very sweet at that old place on the Arno。〃
〃Ella； Ellafor God's sake〃
〃You told me that terrible secret of your lifethat you loved me。 I wonder if I knew what it meant； Bertie？ I told you that I loved you： that was more terrible still。 I wonder if you knew what that meant； Bertie？〃
He did not speak。
The bird's songs outside were becoming softer and more intermittent。
She gave a sudden cry as if stung with pain； and started away from the window。 She threw herself down on the couch； burying her face in the pillowshe could see through the dim room the whiteness of her arms。 She was breathing convulsively； but she was not sobbing。
He remained beside the open window。 He； too； was not breathing so regularly as he had breathed a short time before。
He heard the sigh that came from her as she raised her head from the pillow。
Then she said：
〃I wonder if you ever really loved me； Bertie。〃
〃Oh； my God！〃
〃I wonder if you ever loved me； and I wonder if I ever loved you until this moment。〃
There was a silence。 Outside there was a little whisper of moving wings； but no voice of bird。
There was a silence； and out of it a low voice cried softly； softly：
〃Bertie； Bertie； my love； come to me。〃
He took a step toward her； a second stepand then he stood； rigid； breathless； for he heard another soft voice that said：
〃/His honor is the honor of his mother and his sister； upon which no stain must come。/〃
He heard that voice； and with a cry he covered his face with his hands； and turning； fled through the open window into the garden。
She lay there on her couch； that lovely white creature who had been saved so as by fire。 There are two fires： the one is the fire that consumes the heart until all that is left of it is the dust of ashes； the other is the fire that purifies the soul even unto its salvation； and yet both fires burn alike； so that men and women know not which is burning within them。
Did she know that she was saved so as by fire？
She laughed as though he could still hear her； but after her laugh there came a few moments of overwhelming bitterness that sent her on her knees by the side of the couch in self…abasement。
〃Kill mekill me； O God！〃 she wailed。 〃Kill me； for I am not fit to live！〃
But she was spared。
After a time she found strength to rise。 She seemed surprised to find that the room was in darkness。 She struck a light； and in a few minutes a dozen candles were flaring round the walls； and then she went mechanically to close the window。 One side she had just fastened when it seemed to her that she heard the sound of voices approaching。 She listened； her head bent forward through the side of the window that remained unclosed。
Yes； their voices were sounding clearly through the still nighthis voice andwhat trick was being played upon her by her hearing？ Phyllis' voice？ How could it be Phyllis' voice？ Phyllis had returned to London。 Oh； it was some trick！ Her nerves were playing some trick upon herthey were out of order； they were beyond her control。 Phyllis' voice Great Heavens！ it was Phyllis herself who was walking through the garden by his side！
Ella stood at the open side of the window staring out at them。 They stood at the foot of the half dozen steps that lead up to the window。 Phyllis laughed；was there a trace of mockery in her laugh？but he was silent。
〃I don't wonder at your fancying that I am a ghost； Ella；〃 cried the girl。 〃I feel that I deserve to be treated as discourteously as most poor ghosts are treated when they visit their friends。 You never yet heard of a ghost being asked to stay to dinner； did you； Mr。 Courtland？ But a ghost may fairly claim to be asked to enter the house of her dearest friend； especially after a double railway journey。〃
Ella had not moved from her place at the open space of the window while Phyllis was speaking； but the moment that the girl's laugh sounded； she too laughed。 She ran down the steps and put her arms about Phyllis； kissing her on the face。
〃This is more than the most exacting of ghosts could reasonable look for；〃 cried Phyllis。 〃Oh； Ella！ I'm so glad that I followed my own impulse and came back to you。 I thought you were here all alonehow could I know that Mr。 Courtland would return in the meantime to complete his visit？and when I looked out on the dust and the smoke of the town and thought of thisthisthis exquisite stillness；you can just hear the water of the weir；this garden； this scent of roses； but chiefly when I thought of you sitting in your loneliness Well； is it any wonder that I am here now？you implored of me to stay； you know； Ella。〃
〃It is no wonder indeed； being what you area good angel； my good angel； Phyllis；〃 cried the woman。 〃Oh； dearest； you are welcome！ Why did you leave me Phyllis？ Why did you leave me？ Oh； the good angels can never be trusted。 You should not have left me to myself； dear。 I am only a woman。 Ah； you don't yet know what a woman is。 That is the worst of angels and men； they don't know what a woman is。 Come into the house； Phyllis。 Come in； Herbert。 How did you manage to meet？〃
〃You know I went out to the garden〃 said the man。
〃Yes； I knew thatyou left me alone；〃 said the woman； and she gave a laugh。
〃I strolled from the garden to the roadI had to ask the people at the Old Bell to keep a room for me； of course。〃
〃Of course。〃
〃And just outside the inn I came face to face with Miss Ayrton's fly。 Miss Ayrton was good enough to get out and walk with me； sending the fly on with her maid。 I told the man to wait in order to take my portmanteau to the inn。 It must be at the hall door now。 We entered by the garden gate。〃
〃Nothing could be simpler；〃 said Ella。 They had by this time walked up the steps into the drawing room。 〃Nothing could be simpler。〃 Then she turned to Phyllis。 〃But how did you contrive to evade the great function to…night？〃
〃Papa did not feel very well；〃 said Phyllis； 〃and I know that he was only too glad of an excuse to stay at home。〃
〃And you forsook your sick father to come to me？ Oh； my dear Phyllis； what have you done？〃
〃If you ask me in confidence I should say that papa is not quite so ill as to stand in need of a nurse；〃 she whispered。 〃Oh； no！ Make your mind easy。 I have neglected no duty in coming to you。〃
〃Except your duty to yourself； you could not have had time to take any dinner at home。 I shall have you a servants' hall supper in ten minutes。〃
〃Please get nothing for me。 I had a capital sort of dinner at home。 But I should dearly like a cup of tea。〃
〃It will be ready for you the moment you return from taking off your hat。 I'll go up with you to your room； Mr。 Courtland knows that even I make myself at home in this house。 He will pardon us。〃
〃I mustn't keep the fly waiting f
