the lost road-第59节

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with　her　she　could　not　existthat；　unless　she　knew　some　man　cared
for　her　and　for　her　alone；　she　would　wither　and　die。　　As　a　matter
of　fact；　whether　any　one　loved　her　or　not　did　not　in　the　least
interest　her。　　There　were　several　dozen　men　who　could　testify　to
that。　　They　knew！　What　she　really　wanted　was　to　be　head　over　ears
in　loveto　adore　some　one；　to　worship　him；　to　imagine　herself
starving　for　him　and　making　sacrifice　hits　for　him；　but　when　the
moment　came　to　make　the　sacrifice　hit　and　marry　the　man；　she
invariably　found　that　a　greater；　truer　love　had　arisenfor　some
one　else。

This　greater　and　truer　love　always　made　her　behave　abominably　to
the　youth　she　had　just　jilted。　　She　wasted　no　time　on　post…mortems。
She　was　so　eager　to　show　her　absolute　loyalty　to　the　new　monarch
that　she　grudged　every　thought　she　ever　had　given　the　one　she　had
cast　into　exile。　　She　resented　him　bitterly。　　She　could　not　forgive　him
for　having　allowed　her　to　be　desperately　in　love　with　him。　　He　should
have　known　he　was　not　worthy　of　such　a　love　as　hers。　　He　should　have
known　that　the　real　prince　was　waiting　only　just　round　the　corner。

As　a　rule　the　rejected　ones　behaved　well。　　Each　decided　Aline　was　much
too　wonderful　a　creature　for　him；　and　continued　to　love　her　cautiously
and　from　a　distance。　　None　of　them　ever　spoke　or　thought　ill　of　her　and
would　gladly　have　punched　any　one　who　did。　　It　was　only　the　women
whose　young　men　Aline　had　temporarily　confiscated；　and　then　returned
saddened　and　chastened；　who　were　spiteful。　　And　they　dared　say　no　more
than　that　Aline　would　probably　have　known　her　mind　better　if　she　had
had　a　mother　to　look　after　her。　　This；　coming　to　the　ears　of　Aline；
caused　her　to　reply　that　a　girl　who　could　not　keep　straight　herself；
but　needed　a　mother　to　help　her；　would　not　keep　straight　had　she　a
dozen　mothers。　　As　she　put　it　cheerfully；　a　girl　who　goes　wrong　and
then　pleads　〃no　mother　to　guide　her〃　is　like　a　jockey　who　pulls　a　race
and　then　blames　the　horse。

Each　of　the　young　men　Aline　rejected　married　some　one　else　and；
except　when　the　name　of　Aline　Proctor　in　the　theatrical
advertisements　or　in　electric　lights　on　Broadway　gave　him　a
start；　forgot　that　for　a　month　her　name　and　his　own　had　been
linked　together　from　Portland　to　San　Francisco。　　But　the　girl　he
married　did　not　forget。　　She　never　understood　what　the　public　saw
in　Aline　Proctor。　　That　Aline　was　the　queen　of　musical　comedy　she
attributed　to　the　fact　that　Aline　knew　the　right　people　and　got
herself　written　about　in　the　right　way。　　But　that　she　could　sing；
dance；　act；　that　she　possessed　compelling　charm；　that　she　〃got
across〃　not　only　to　the　tired　business　man；　the　wine　agent；　the
college　boy；　but　also　to　the　children　and　the　old　ladies；　was　to
her　never　apparent。

Just　as　Aline　could　not　forgive　the　rejected　suitor　for　allowing
her　to　love　him；　so　the　girl　he　married　never　forgave　Aline　for
having　loved　her　husband。　　Least　of　all　could　Sally　Winthrop；　who
two　years　after　the　summer　at　Bar　Harbor　married　Herbert　Nelson；
forgive　her。　　And　she　let　Herbert　know　it。　　Herbert　was　properly
in　love　with　Sally　Winthrop；　but　he　liked　to　think　that　his
engagement　to　Aline；　though　brief　and　abruptly　terminated；　had
proved　him　to　be　a　man　fatally　attractive　to　all　women。　　And
though　he　was　hypnotizing　himself　into　believing　that　his　feeling
for　Aline　had　been　the　grand　passion；　the　truth　was　that　all　that
kept　her　in　his　thoughts　was　his　own　vanity。　　He　was　not
discontented　with　his　lothis　lot　being　Sally　Winthrop；　her
millions；　and　her　estate　of　three　hundred　acres　near　Westbury。
Nor　was　he　still　longing　for　Aline。　　It　was　only　that　his　vanity
was　flattered　by　the　recollection　that　one　of　the　young　women
most　beloved　by　the　public　had　once　loved　him。

〃I　once　was　a　king　in　Babylon；〃　he　used　to　misquote　to　himself；
〃and　she　was　a　Christian　slave。〃

He　was　as　young　as　that。

Had　he　been　content　in　secret　to　assure　himself　that　he　once　had
been　a　reigning　monarch；　his　vanity　would　have　harmed　no　one；
but；　unfortunately；　he　possessed　certain　documentary　evidence　to
that　fact。　　And　he　was　sufficiently　foolish　not　to　wish　to　destroy
it。　　The　evidence　consisted　of　a　dozen　photographs　he　had　snapped
of　Aline　during　the　happy　days　at　Bar　Harbor；　and　on　which　she
had　written　phrases　somewhat　exuberant　and　sentimental。

From　these　photographs　Nelson　was　loath　to　partespecially　with
one　that　showed　Aline　seated　on　a　rock　that　ran　into　the　waters　of
the　harbor；　and　on　which　she　had　written：　〃As　long　as　this　rock
lasts！〃　　Each　time　she　was　in　love　Aline　believed　it　would　last。
That　in　the　past　it　never　had　lasted　did　not　discourage　her。

What　to　do　with　these　photographs　that　so　vividly　recalled　the
most　tumultuous　period　of　his　life　Nelson　could　not　decide。　　If　he
hid　them　away　and　Sally　found　them；　he　knew　she　would　make　his
life　miserable。　　If　he　died　and　Sally　then　found　them；　when　he　no
longer　was　able　to　explain　that　they　meant　nothing　to　him；　she
would　believe　he　always　had　loved　the　other　woman；　and　it　would
make　her　miserable。　　He　felt　he　could　not　safely　keep　them　in　his
own　house；　his　vanity　did　not　permit　him　to　burn　them；　and；
accordingly；　he　decided　to　unload　them　on　some　one　else。

The　young　man　to　whom　he　confided　his　collection　was　Charles
Cochran。　　Cochran　was　a　charming　person　from　the　West。　　He　had
studied　in　the　Beaux　Arts　and　on　foot　had　travelled　over　England
and　Europe；　preparing　himself　to　try　his　fortune　in　New　York　as
an　architect。　　He　was　now　in　the　office　of　the　architects　Post　&
Constant；　and　lived　alone　in　a　tiny　farmhouse　he　had　made　over
for　himself　near　Herbert　Nelson；　at　Westbury；　Long　Island。

Post　&　Constant　were　a　fashionable　firm　and　were　responsible　for
many　of　the　French　chateaux　and　English　country　houses　that　were
rising　near　Westbury；　Hempstead；　and　Roslyn；　and　it　was　Cochran's
duty　to　drive　over　that　territory　in　his　runabout；　keep　an　eye　on
the　contractors；　and　dissuade　clients　from　grafting　mansard　roofs
on　Italian　villas。　　He　had　built　the　summer　home　of　the　Herbert
Nelsons；　and　Herbert　and　Charles　were　very　warm　friends。　　Charles
was　of　the　same　lack　of　years　as　was　Herbert；　of　an　enthusiastic
and　sentimental　nature；　and；　like　many　other　young　men；　the　story
of　his　life　also　was　the　lovely　and　much…desired　Aline　Proctor。
It　was　this　coincidence　that　had　made　them　friends　and　that　had
led　Herbert　to　select　Charles　as　the　custodian　of　his　treasure。
As　a　custodian　and　confidant　Charles　especially　appealed　to　his
new　friend；　because；　except　upon　the　stage　and　in　restaurants；
Charles　had　never　seen　Aline　Proctor；　did　not　know　herand
considered　her　so　far　above　him；　so　unattainable；　that　he　had　no
wish　to　seek　her　out。　　Unknown；　he　preferred　to　worship　at　a
distance。　　In　this　determination　Herbert　strongly　encouraged　him。

When　he　turned　over　the　pictures　to　Charles；　Herbert　could　not
resist　showing　them　to　him。　　They　were　in　many　ways　charming。
They　presented　the　queen　of　musical　comedy　in　several　new　roles。
In　one　she　was　in　a　sailor　suit；　giving　an　imitation　of　a　girl
paddling　a　canoe。　　In　another　she　was　in　a　riding…habit　mounted
upon　a　pony　of　which　she　seemed　very　much　afraid。

In　some　she　sat　like　a　siren　among　the　rocks　with　the　waves　and
seaweed　snatching　at　her　feet；　and　in　another　she　crouched
beneath　the　wheel　of　Herbert's　touring　car。　　All　of　the
photographs　were　unprofessional　and　intimate；　and　the
legends　scrawled　across　them　were　even　more　intimate。

〃'As　long　as　this　rock　lasts！'〃　read　Herbert。　　At　arm's　length　he
held　the　picture　for　Cochran　to　see；　and　laughed　bitterly　and
unmirthfully　as　he　had　heard　leading　men　laugh　in　problem　plays。

〃That　is　what　she　wrote；〃　he　mocked〃but　how　long　did　it　last？
Until　she　saw　that　little　red…headed　Albany　playing　polo。　　That
lasted　until　his　mother　heard　of　it。　　She　thought　her　precious
lamb　was　in　the　clutches　of　a　designing　actress；　and　made　the
Foreign　Office　cable　him　home。　　Then　Aline　took　up　one　of　those
army　aviators；　and　chucked　him　for　that　fellow　who　painted　her
portrait；　and　threw　him　over　for　the　lawn…tennis　champion。　　Now
she's　engaged　to　Chester　Griswold；　and　Heaven　pity　her！　Of　course
he's　the　greatest　catch　in　America；　but　he's　a　prig　and　a　snob；　and
he's　so　generous　with　his　money　that　he'll　give　you　five　pennies　for
a　nickel　any　time　you　ask　him。　　He's　got　a　heart　like　the　metre　of　a
taxicab；　and　he's　jealous　as　a　cat。　　Aline　will　have　a　fine　time　with
Chester！　I　knew　him　at　St。　Paul's　and　at　Harvard；　and　he's　got　as
much　red　blood　in　him　as　an　eel！〃

Cochran　sprang　to　the　defense　of　the　lady　of　his　dreams。

〃There　must　be　some　good　in　the　man；〃　he　protested；　〃or　Miss
Proctor…〃

〃Oh；　those　solemn　snobs；〃　declared　Herbert；　〃impress　women　by
just　keeping　still。　　Griswold　pretends　the　reason　he　doesn't　speak
to　you　is　because　he's　too　superior；　but　the　real　reason　is　that
he　knows　whenever　he　opens　his　mouth　he　shows　he　is　an　ass。〃

Reluctantly　Herbert　turned　over　to　Charles　the　precious　pictures。
〃It　would　be　a　sin　to　destroy　them；　wouldn't　it？〃　he　prompted。

Cochran　agreed　heartily。

〃You　might　even；〃　suggested　Herbert；　〃leave　on