the lost road-第52节

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one　else　not　all　his　troop　horses　nor　all　his　men　could　put
Humpty　Dumpty　back　again。

But　if；　in　regard　to　Mr。　Stedman；　Miss　Gardner　had　for　a　moment
been　at　odds　with　the　man　who　loved　her；　she　made　up　for　it　the
day　following　on　the　tennis　court。　　There　she　was　in　accord　with
him　in　heart；　soul；　and　body；　and　her　sharp　〃Well　played；
partner！〃　thrilled　him　like　one　of　his　own　bugle　calls。　　For　two
days　against　visiting　and　local　teams　they　fought　their　way
through　the　tournament；　and　the　struggle　with　her　at　his　side
filled　Lee　with　a　great　happiness。　　Not　that　the　championship　of
Agawamsett　counted　greatly　to　one　exiled　for　three　years　to　live
among　the　Moros。　　He　wanted　to　win　because　she　wanted　to　win。
But　his　happiness　came　in　doing　something　in　common　with　her；
in　helping　her　and　in　having　her　help　him；　in　being；　if　only　in
play；　if　only　for　three　days；　her　〃partner。〃

After　they　won　they　walked　home　together；　each　swinging　a　fat；
heavy　loving…cup。　　On　each　was　engraved：

〃Mixed　doubles；　Agawamsett；　1910。〃

Lee　held　his　up　so　that　the　setting　sun　flashed　on　the　silver。

〃I　am　going　to　keep　that；〃　he　said；　〃as　long　as　I　live。　　It　means
you　were　once　my　'partner。'　　It's　a　sign　that　once　we　two　worked
together　for　something　and　won。〃　　In　the　words　the　man　showed
such　feeling　that　the　girl　said　soberly：

〃Mine　means　that　to　me；　too。　　I　will　never　part　with　mine；
either。〃

Lee　turned　to　her　and　smiled；　appealing　wistfully。

〃It　seems　a　pity　to　separate　them；〃　he　said。　　〃They'd　look　well
together　over　an　open　fireplace。〃

The　girl　frowned　unhappily。　　〃I　don't　know；〃　she　protested。　　〃I
don't　know。〃

The　next　day　Lee　received　from　the　War　Department　a　telegram
directing　him　to　〃proceed　without　delay〃　to　San　Francisco；　and
there　to　embark　for　the　Philippines。

That　night　he　put　the　question　to　her　directly；　but　again　she
shook　her　head　unhappily；　again　she　said：　〃I　don't　know！〃

So　he　sailed　without　her；　and　each　evening　at　sunset；　as　the
great　transport　heaved　her　way　across　the　swell　of　the　Pacific；
he　stood　at　the　rail　and　looked　back。　　With　the　aid　of　the　first
officer　he　calculated　the　difference　in　time　between　a　whaling
village　situated　at　forty…four　degrees　north　and　an　army
transport　dropping　rapidly　toward　the　equator；　and　so；　each　day；
kept　in　step　with　the　girl　he　loved。

〃Now；〃　he　would　tell　himself；　〃she　is　in　her　cart　in　front　of　the
post…office；　and　while　they　sort　the　morning　mail　she　gossips
with　the　fisher　folks；　the　summer　folks；　the　grooms；　and
chauffeurs。　　Now　she　is　sitting　for　her　portrait　to　Stedman〃　（he
did　not　dwell　long　on　that　part　of　her　day）；　〃and　now　she　is　at
tennis；　or；　as　she　promised；　riding　alone　at　sunset　down　our　lost
road　through　the　woods。〃

But　that　part　of　her　day　from　which　Lee　hurried　was　that　part
over　which　the　girl　herself　lingered。　　As　he　turned　his　eyes　from
his　canvas　to　meet　hers；　Stedman；　the　charming；　the　deferential；
the　adroit；　who　never　allowed　his　painting　to　interrupt　his　talk；
told　her　of　what　he　was　pleased　to　call　his　dreams　and　ambitions；
of　the　great　and　beautiful　ladies　who　had　sat　before　his　easel；
and　of　the　only　one　of　them　who　had　given　him　inspiration。
Especially　of　the　only　one　who　had　given　him　inspiration。　　With
her　always　to　uplift　him；　he　could　become　one　of　the　world's　most
famous　artists；　and　she　would　go　down　into　history　as　the
beautiful　woman　who　had　helped　him；　as　the　wife　of　Rembrandt
had　inspired　Rembrandt；　as　〃Mona　Lisa〃　had　made　Leonardo。

Gilbert　wrote：　〃It　is　not　the　lover　who　comes　to　woo；　but　the
lover's　way　of　wooing！〃　His　successful　lover　was　the　one　who
threw　the　girl　across　his　saddle　and　rode　away　with　her。　　But　one
kind　of　woman　does　not　like　to　have　her　lover　approach　shouting：
〃At　the　gallop！　Charge！〃

She　prefers　a　man　not　because　he　is　masterful；　but　because　he　is
not。　　She　likes　to　believe　the　man　needs　her　more　than　she　needs
him；　that　she；　and　only　she；　can　steady　him；　cheer　him；　keep　him
true　to　the　work　he　is　in　the　world　to　perform。　　It　is　called　the
〃mothering〃　instinct。

Frances　felt　this　mothering　instinct　toward　the　sensitive；
imaginative；　charming　Stedman。　　She　believed　he　had　but　two
thoughts；　his　art　and　herself。　　She　was　content　to　place　his　art　first。
She　could　not　guess　that　to　one　so　unworldly；　to　one　so　wrapped　up
in　his　art；　the　fortune　of　a　rich　aunt　might　prove　alluring。

When　the　transport　finally　picked　up　the　landfalls　of　Cavite
Harbor；　Lee；　with　the　instinct　of　a　soldier；　did　not　exclaim：
〃This　is　where　Dewey　ran　the　forts　and　sank　the　Spanish　fleet！〃
On　the　contrary；　he　was　saying：　〃When　she　comes　to　join　me；　it
will　be　here　I　will　first　see　her　steamer。　　I　will　be　waiting　with
a　field…glass　on　the　end　of　that　wharf。　　No；　I　will　be　out　here　in
a　shore…boat　waving　my　hat。　　And　of　all　those　along　the　rail；　my
heart　will　tell　me　which　is　she！〃

Then　a　barefooted　Filipino　boy　handed　him　an　unsigned　cablegram。
It　read：　〃If　I　wrote　a　thousand　words　I　could　not　make　it　easier
for　either　of　us。　　I　am　to　marry　Arthur　Stedman　in　December。〃

Lee　was　grateful　for　the　fact　that　he　was　not　permitted　to　linger
in　Manila。　　Instead；　he　was　at　once　ordered　up…country；　where　at　a
one…troop　post　he　administered　the　affairs　of　a　somewhat　hectic
province；　and　under　the　guidance　of　the　local　constabulary　chased
will…o'…the…wisp　brigands。　　On　a　shelf　in　his　quarters　he　placed
the　silver　loving…cup；　and　at　night；　when　the　village　slept；　he
would　sit　facing　it；　filling　one　pipe　after　another；　and　through
the　smoke　staring　at　the　evidence　to　the　fact　that　once　Frances
Gardner　and　he　had　been　partners。

In　these　post…mortems　he　saw　nothing　morbid。　　With　his　present
activities　they　in　no　way　interfered；　and　in　thinking　of　the　days
when　they　had　been　together；　in　thinking　of　what　he　had　lost；　he
found　deep　content。　　Another　man；　having　lost　the　woman　he　loved；
would　have　tried　to　forget　her　and　all　she　meant　to　him。　　But　Lee
was　far　too　honest　with　himself　to　substitute　other　thoughts　for
those　that　were　glorious；　that　still　thrilled　him。　　The　girl　could
take　herself　from　him；　but　she　could　not　take　his　love　for　her
from　him。　　And　for　that　he　was　grateful。　　He　never　had　considered
himself　worthy；　and　so　could　not　believe　he　had　been　ill　used。　　In
his　thoughts　of　her　there　was　no　bitterness：　for　that　also　he　was
grateful。　　And；　as　he　knew　he　would　not　care　for　any　other　woman
in　the　way　he　cared　for　her；　he　preferred　to　care　in　that　way；
even　for　one　who　was　lost；　than　in　a　lesser　way　for　a　possible
she　who　some　day　might　greatly　care　for　him。　　So　she　still
remained　in　his　thoughts；　and　was　so　constantly　with　him　that　he
led　a　dual　existence；　in　which　by　day　he　directed　the　affairs　of
an　alien　and　hostile　people　and　by　night　again　lived　through　the
wonderful　moments　when　she　had　thought　she　loved　him；　when　he
first　had　learned　to　love　her。　　At　times　she　seemed　actually　at
his　side；　and　he　could　not　tell　whether　he　was　pretending　that
this　were　so　or　whether　the　force　of　his　love　had　projected　her
image　half　around　the　world。

Often；　when　in　single　file　he　led　the　men　through　the　forest；　he
seemed　again　to　be　back　on　Cape　Cod　picking　his　way　over　their
own　lost　road　through　the　wood；　and　he　heard　〃the　beat　of　a
horse's　feet　and　the　swish　of　a　skirt　in　the　dew。〃　　And　then　a
carbine　would　rattle；　or　a　horse　would　stumble　and　a　trooper
swear；　and　he　was　again　in　the　sweating　jungle；　where　men；　intent
upon　his　life；　crouched　in　ambush。

She　spared　him　the　mockery　of　wedding…cards；　but　the　announcement
of　the　wedding　came　to　him　in　a　three…months…old　newspaper。　　Hoping
they　would　speak　of　her　in　their　letters；　he　kept　up　a　somewhat　one…sided
correspondence　with　friends　of　Mrs。　Stedman's　in　Boston；　where　she　now
lived。　　But　for　a　year　in　none　of　their　letters　did　her　name　appear。　　When
a　mutual　friend　did　write　of　her　Lee　understood　the　silence。

From　the　first；　the　mutual　friend　wrote；　the　life　of　Mrs。　Stedman
and　her　husband　was　thoroughly　miserable。　　Stedman　blamed　her
because　she　came　to　him　penniless。　　The　rich　aunt；　who　had
heartily　disapproved　of　the　artist；　had　spoken　of　him　so　frankly
that　Frances　had　quarrelled　with　her；　and　from　her　no　longer
would　accept　money。　　In　his　anger　at　this　Stedman　showed　himself
to　Frances　as　he　was。　　And　only　two　months　after　their　marriage
she　was　further　enlightened。

An　irate　husband　made　him　the　central　figure　in　a　scandal　that
filled　the　friends　of　Frances　with　disgust；　and　that　for　her　was
an　awakening　cruel　and　humiliating。　　Men　no　longer　permitted　their
womenfolk　to　sit　to　Stedman　for　a　portrait；　and　the　need　of　money
grew　imperative。　　He　the　more　blamed　Frances　for　having　quarrelled
with　her　aunt；　told　her　it　was　for　her　money　he　had　married　her；
that　she　had　ruined　his　career；　and　that　she　was　to　blame　for　his
ostracisma　condition　that　his　own　misconduct　had　brought　upon
him。　　Finally；　after　twelve　months　of　this；　one　morning　he　left　a
note　saying　he　no　longer　would　allow　her　to　be　a　drag　upon　him；
and　sailed　for　Europe。

They　learned　that；　in　Paris；　he　had　returned　to　that　life　which
before　his　marriage；　even　in　that　easy…going　ci