desperate remedies-第49节

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cannot　think。　　You　shall　hear　again　in　a　day　or　two；　if　it　is　no
better。　。　。Your　loving　brother；　OWEN。'

This　she　answered；　begging　to　know　the　worst；　which　she　could　bear；
but　suspense　and　anxiety　never。　　In　two　days　came　another　letter
from　him；　of　which　the　subjoined　paragraph　is　a　portion：

'I　had　quite　decided　to　let　you　know　the　worst；　and　to　assure　you
that　it　was　the　worst；　before　you　wrote　to　ask　it。　　And　again　I　give
you　my　word　that　I　will　conceal　nothingso　that　there　will　be　no
excuse　whatever　for　your　wearing　yourself　out　with　fears　that　I　am
worse　than　I　say。　　This　morning　then；　for　the　first　time；　I　have
been　obliged　to　stay　away　from　the　office。　　Don't　be　frightened　at
this；　dear　Cytherea。　　Rest　is　all　that　is　wanted；　and　by　nursing
myself　now　for　a　week；　I　may　avoid　an　illness　of　six　months。'

After　a　visit　from　her　he　wrote　again：

'Dr。　Chestman　has　seen　me。　　He　said　that　the　ailment　was　some　sort
of　rheumatism；　and　I　am　now　undergoing　proper　treatment　for　its
cure。　　My　leg　and　foot　have　been　placed　in　hot　bran；　liniments　have
been　applied；　and　also　severe　friction　with　a　pad。　　He　says　I　shall
be　as　right　as　ever　in　a　very　short　time。　　Directly　I　am　I　shall　run
up　by　the　train　to　see　you。　　Don't　trouble　to　come　to　me　if　Miss
Aldclyffe　grumbles　again　about　your　being　away；　for　I　am　going　on
capitally。　。　。　。　　You　shall　hear　again　at　the　end　of　the　week。'

At　the　time　mentioned　came　the　following：

'I　am　sorry　to　tell　you；　because　I　know　it　will　be　so　disheartening
after　my　last　letter；　that　I　am　not　so　well　as　I　was　then；　and　that
there　has　been　a　sort　of　hitch　in　the　proceedings。　　After　I　had　been
treated　for　rheumatism　a　few　days　longer　（in　which　treatment　they
pricked　the　place　with　a　long　needle　several　times；）　I　saw　that　Dr。
Chestman　was　in　doubt　about　something；　and　I　requested　that　he　would
call　in　a　brother　professional　man　to　see　me　as　well。　　They
consulted　together　and　then　told　me　that　rheumatism　was　not　the
disease　after　all；　but　erysipelas。　　They　then　began　treating　it
differently；　as　became　a　different　matter。　　Blisters；　flour；　and
starch；　seem　to　be　the　order　of　the　day　nowmedicine；　of　course；
besides。

'Mr。　Gradfield　has　been　in　to　inquire　about　me。　　He　says　he　has　been
obliged　to　get　a　designer　in　my　place；　which　grieves　me　very　much；
though；　of　course；　it　could　not　be　avoided。'

A　month　passed　away；　throughout　this　period；　Cytherea　visited　him　as
often　as　the　limited　time　at　her　command　would　allow；　and　wore　as
cheerful　a　countenance　as　the　womanly　determination　to　do　nothing
which　might　depress　him　could　enable　her　to　wear。　　Another　letter
from　him　then　told　her　these　additional　facts：

'The　doctors　find　they　are　again　on　the　wrong　tack。　　They　cannot
make　out　what　the　disease　is。　　O　Cytherea！　how　I　wish　they　knew！
This　suspense　is　wearing　me　out。　　Could　not　Miss　Aldclyffe　spare　you
for　a　day？　　Do　come　to　me。　　We　will　talk　about　the　best　course　then。
I　am　sorry　to　complain；　but　I　am　worn　out。〃

Cytherea　went　to　Miss　Aldclyffe；　and　told　her　of　the　melancholy　turn
her　brother's　illness　had　taken。　　Miss　Aldclyffe　at　once　said　that
Cytherea　might　go；　and　offered　to　do　anything　to　assist　her　which
lay　in　her　power。　　Cytherea's　eyes　beamed　gratitude　as　she　turned　to
leave　the　room；　and　hasten　to　the　station。

'O；　Cytherea；'　said　Miss　Aldclyffe；　calling　her　back；　　'just　one
word。　　Has　Mr。　Manston　spoken　to　you　lately？'

'Yes；'　said　Cytherea；　blushing　timorously。

'He　proposed？'

'Yes。'

'And　you　refused　him？'

'Yes。'

'Tut；　tut！　　Now　listen　to　my　advice；'　said　Miss　Aldclyffe
emphatically；　'and　accept　him　before　he　changes　his　mind。　　The
chance　which　he　offers　you　of　settling　in　life　is　one　that　may
possibly；　probably；　not　occur　again。　　His　position　is　good　and
secure；　and　the　life　of　his　wife　would　be　a　happy　one。　　You　may　not
be　sure　that　you　love　him　madly；　but　suppose　you　are　not　sure？　　My
father　used　to　say　to　me　as　a　child　when　he　was　teaching　me　whist；
〃When　in　doubt　win　the　trick！〃　　That　advice　is　ten　times　as　valuable
to　a　woman　on　the　subject　of　matrimony。　　In　refusing　a　man　there　is
always　the　risk　that　you　may　never　get　another　offer。'

'Why　didn't　you　win　the　trick　when　you　were　a　girl？'　said　Cytherea。

'Come；　my　lady　Pert；　I'm　not　the　text；'　said　Miss　Aldclyffe；　her
face　glowing　like　fire。

Cytherea　laughed　stealthily。

'I　was　about　to　say；'　resumed　Miss　Aldclyffe　severely；　'that　here　is
Mr。　Manston　waiting　with　the　tenderest　solicitude　for　you；　and　you
overlooking　it；　as　if　it　were　altogether　beneath　you。　　Think　how　you
might　benefit　your　sick　brother　if　you　were　Mrs。　Manston。　　You　will
please　me　VERY　MUCH　by　giving　him　some　encouragement。　　You
understand　me；　Cythie　dear？'

Cytherea　was　silent。

'And；'　said　Miss　Aldclyffe；　still　more　emphatically；　'on　your
promising　that　you　will　accept　him　some　time　this　year；　I　will　take
especial　care　of　your　brother。　　You　are　listening；　Cytherea？'

'Yes；'　she　whispered；　leaving　the　room。

She　went　to　Budmouth；　passed　the　day　with　her　brother；　and　returned
to　Knapwater　wretched　and　full　of　foreboding。　　Owen　had　looked
startlingly　thin　and　palethinner　and　paler　than　ever　she　had　seen
him　before。　　The　brother　and　sister　had　that　day　decided　that
notwithstanding　the　drain　upon　their　slender　resources；　another
surgeon　should　see　him。　　Time　was　everything。

Owen　told　her　the　result　in　his　next　letter：

'The　three　practitioners　between　them　have　at　last　hit　the　nail　on
the　head；　I　hope。　　They　probed　the　place；　and　discovered　that　the
secret　lay　in　the　bone。　　I　underwent　an　operation　for　its　removal
three　days　ago　（after　taking　chloroform）。　。　。　　Thank　God　it　is　over。
Though　I　am　so　weak；　my　spirits　are　rather　better。　　I　wonder　when　I
shall　be　at　work　again？　　I　asked　the　surgeons　how　long　it　would　be
first。　　I　said　a　month？　　They　shook　their　heads。　　A　year？　I　said。
Not　so　long；　they　said。　　Six　months？　I　inquired。　　They　would　not；　or
could　not；　tell　me。　　But　never　mind。

'Run　down；　when　you　have　half　a　day　to　spare；　for　the　hours　drag　on
so　drearily。　　O　Cytherea；　you　can't　think　how　drearily！'

She　went。　　Immediately　on　her　departure　Miss　Aldclyffe　sent　a　note
to　the　Old　House；　to　Manston。　　On　the　maiden's　return；　tired　and
sick　at　heart　as　usual；　she　found　Manston　at　the　station　awaiting
her。　　He　asked　politely　if　he　might　accompany　her　to　Knapwater。　　She
tacitly　acquiesced。　　During　their　walk　he　inquired　the　particulars
of　her　brother's　illness；　and　with　an　irresistible　desire　to　pour
out　her　trouble　to　some　one；　she　told　him　of　the　length　of　time
which　must　elapse　before　he　could　be　strong　again；　and　of　the　lack
of　comfort　in　lodgings。

Manston　was　silent　awhile。　　Then　he　said　impetuously：　　'Miss　Graye；
I　will　not　mince　mattersI　love　youyou　know　it。　　Stratagem　they
say　is　fair　in　love；　and　I　am　compelled　to　adopt　it　now。　　Forgive
me；　for　I　cannot　help　it。　　Consent　to　be　my　wife　at　any　time　that
may　suit　youany　remote　day　you　may　name　will　satisfy　meand　you
shall　find　him　well　provided　for。'

For　the　first　time　in　her　life　she　truly　dreaded　the　handsome　man　at
her　side　who　pleaded　thus　selfishly；　and　shrank　from　the　hot
voluptuous　nature　of　his　passion　for　her；　which；　disguise　it　as　he
might　under　a　quiet　and　polished　exterior；　at　times　radiated　forth
with　a　scorching　white　heat。　　She　perceived　how　animal　was　the　love
which　bargained。

'I　do　not　love　you；　Mr。　Manston；'　she　replied　coldly。

5。　　FROM　THE　FIRST　TO　THE　TWENTY…SEVENTH　OF　AUGUST

The　long　sunny　days　of　the　later　summer…time　brought　only　the　same
dreary　accounts　from　Budmouth；　and　saw　Cytherea　paying　the　same　sad
visits。

She　grew　perceptibly　weaker；　in　body　and　mind。　　Manston　still
persisted　in　his　suit；　but　with　more　of　his　former　indirectness；　now
that　he　saw　how　unexpectedly　well　she　stood　an　open　attack。　　His　was
the　system　of　Dares　at　the　Sicilian　games

　　　　　'He；　like　a　captain　who　beleaguers　round
　　　　　　Some　strong…built　castle　on　a　rising　ground；
　　　　　　Views　all　the　approaches　with　observing　eyes；
　　　　　　This　and　that　other　part　again　he　tries；
　　　　　　And　more　on　industry　than　force　relies。'

Miss　Aldclyffe　made　it　appear　more　clearly　than　ever　that　aid　to
Owen　from　herself　depended　entirely　upon　Cytherea's　acceptance　of
her　steward。　　Hemmed　in　and　distressed；　Cytherea's　answers　to　his
importunities　grew　less　uniform；　they　were　firm；　or　wavering；　as
Owen's　malady　fluctuated。　　Had　a　register　of　her　pitiful
oscillations　been　kept；　it　would　have　rivalled　in　pathos　the　diary
wherein　De　Quincey　tabulates　his　combat　with　Opiumperhaps　as
noticeable　an　instance　as　any　in　which　a　thrilling　dramatic　power
has　been　given　to　mere　numerals。　　Thus　she　wearily　and　monotonously
lived　through　the　month；　listening　on　Sundays　to　the　wellknown　round
of　chapters　narrating　the　history　of　Elijah　and　Elisha　in　famine　and
drought；　on　week…days　to　buzzing　flies　in　hot　sunny　rooms。　　'So
like；　so　very　like；　was　day　to　day。'　　Extreme　lassitude　seemed　all
that　the　world　could　show　her。

Her　state　was　in　this　wise；　when　one　afternoon；　having　been　with　her
brother；　she　met　the　surgeon；　and　begged　him　to　tell　the　actual
truth　concerning　Owen's　con