april hopes-第32节

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〃I'm　going　to　cross　here　at　once　and　walk　up　the　other　pavement；　and　you
must　go　back　through　the　Garden；　or　else　I　shall　never　get　away　from
you。〃

May　I　look　over　at　you？〃

You　may　glance；　but　you　needn't　expect　me　to　return　your　glance。〃

〃Oh　no。〃

〃And　I　want　you　to　take　the　very　first　Cambridge　car　that　comes　along。　　I
command　you　to。〃

〃I　thought　you　wanted　me　to　do　the　commanding。〃

〃So　I　doin　essentials。　　If　you　command　me　not　to　cry　when　I　get　home；　I
won't。〃

She　looked　at　him　with　an　ecstasy　of　self…sacrifice　in　her　eyes。

〃Ah；　I　sha'n't　do　that。　　I　can't　tell　what　would　open。　　ButAlice！〃

〃Well；　what？〃　　She　drifted　closely　to　him；　and　looked　fondly　up　into　his
face。　　In　walking　they　had　insensibly　drawn　nearer　together；　and　she　had
been　obliged　constantly　to　put　space　between　them。　　Now；　standing　at　the
corner　of　Arlington　Street；　and　looking　tentatively　across　Beacon；　she
abandoned　all　precautions。

〃What！　　I　forget。　　Oh　yes！　　I　love　you！〃

〃But　you　said　that　before；　dearest！〃

〃Yes；　but　just　now　it　struck　me　as　a　very　novel　idea。　　What　if　your
mother　shouldn't　like　the　idea？〃

〃Nonsense！　you　know　she　perfectly　idolises　you。　　She　did　from　the　first。
And　doesn't　she　know　how　I've　begin　behaving　about　you　ever　since　Ilost
you？〃

〃How　have　you　behaved？　　Do　tell　me；　Alice？〃

〃Some　time；　not　now；〃　she　said；　and　with　something　that　was　like　a　gasp；
and　threatened　to　be　a　sob；　she　suddenly　whipped　across　the　road。　　He
walked　back　to　Charles　Street　by　the　Garden　path；　keeping　abreast　of　her；
and　not　losing　sight　of　her　for　a　moment；　except　when　the　bulk　of　a
string　team　watering　at　the　trough　beside　the　pavement　intervened。　　He
hurried　by；　and　when　he　had　passed　it　he　found　himself　exactly　abreast　of
her　again。　　Her　face　was　turned　toward　him；　they　exchanged　a　smile；　lost
in　space。　　At　the　corner　of　Charles　Street　he　deliberately　crossed　over
to　her。

〃O　dearest　love！　why　did　you　come？〃　she　implored。

〃Because　you　signed　to　me。〃

〃I　hoped　you　wouldn't　see　it。　　If　we're　both　to　be　so　weak　as　this；　what
are　we　going　to　do？〃　　But　I'm　glad　you　came。　　Yes：　I　was　frightened。
They　must　have　overheard　us　there　when　we　were　talking。〃

〃Well；　I　didn't　say　anything　I'm　ashamed　of。　　Besides；　I　shouldn't　care
much　for　the　opinion　of　those　nurses　and　babies。〃

〃Of　course　not。　　But　people　must　have　seen　us。　　Don't　stand　here　talking；
Dan！　　Do　come　on！〃　　She　hurried　him　across　the　street；　and　walked　him
swiftly　up　the　incline　of　Beacon　Street。　　There；　in　her　new　fall　suit；
with　him；　glossy…hatted；　faultlessly　gloved；　at　a　fit　distance　from　her
side；　she　felt　more　in　keeping　with　the　social　frame　of　things　than　in
the　Garden　path；　which　was　really　only　a　shade　better　than　the　Beacon
Street　Mall　of　the　Common。　　〃Do　you　suppose　anybody　saw　us　that　knew　us？〃

〃I　hope　so！　　Don't　you　want　people　to　know　it？〃

〃Yes；　of　course。　　They　will　have　to　know　itin　the　right　way。　　Can　you
believe　that　it's　only　half　a　year　since　we　met？　　It　won't　be　a　year　till
Class　Day。〃

〃I　don't　believe　it；　Alice。　　I　can't　recollect　anything　before　I　knew
you。〃

〃Well；　now；　as　time　is　so　confused；　we　must　try　to　live　for　eternity。　　We
must　try　to　help　each　other　to　be　good。　　Oh；　when　I　think　what　a　happy
girl　I　am；　I　feel　that　I　should　be　the　most　ungrateful　person　under　the
sun　not　to　be　good。　　Let's　try　to　make　our　lives　perfectperfect！　　They
can　be。　　And　we　mustn't　live　for　each　other　alone。　　We　must　try　to　do
good　as　well　as　be　good。　　We　must　be　kind　and　forbearing　with　every　one。〃

He　answered；　with　tender　seriousness；　〃My　life's　in　your　hands；　Alice。
It　shall　be　whatever　you　wish。〃

They　were　both　silent　in　their　deep　belief　of　this。　　When　they　spoke
again；　she　began　gaily：　〃I　shall　never　get　over　the　wonder　of　it。　　How
strange　that　we　should　meet　at　the　Museum！〃　　They　had　both　said　this
already；　but　that　did　not　matter；　they　had　said　nearly　everything　two　or
three　times。　　〃How　did　you　happen　to　be　there？〃　she　asked；　and　the
question　was　so　novel　that　she　added；　〃I　haven't　asked　you　before。〃

He　stopped；　with　a　look　of　dismay　that　broke　up　in　a　hopeless　laugh。
〃Why；　I　went　there　to　meet　some　peoplesome　ladies。　　And　when　I　saw　you
I　forgot　all　about　them。〃

Alice　laughed　to；　this　was　a　part　of　their　joy；　their　triumph。

〃Who　are　they？〃　she　asked　indifferently；　and　only　to　heighten　the
absurdity　by　realising　the　persons。

〃You　don't　know　them；〃　he　said。　　〃Mrs。　Frobisher　and　her　sister；　of
Portland。　　I　promised　to　meet　them　there　and　go　out　to　Cambridge　with
them。〃

〃What　will　they　think？〃　asked　Alice。　　〃It's　too　amusing。〃

〃They'll　think　I　didn't　come；〃　said　Mavering；　with　the　easy　conscience　of
youth　and　love；　and　again　they　laughed　at　the　ridiculous　position
together。　　〃I　remember　now　I　was　to　be　at　the　door；　and　they　were　to　take
me　up　in　their　carriage。　　I　wonder　how　long　they　waited？　　You　put
everything　else　out　of　my　head。〃

〃Do　you　think　I'll　keep　it　out？〃　she　asked　archly。

〃Oh　yes；　there　is　nothing　else　but　you　now。〃

The　eyes　that　she　dropped；　after　a　glance　at　him；　glistened　with　tears。

A　lump　came　into　his　throat。　　〃Do　you　suppose；〃　he　asked　huskily；　〃that
we　can　ever　misunderstand　each　other　again？〃

〃Never。　　I　see　everything　clearly　now。　　We　shall　trust　each　other
implicitly；　and　at　the　least　thing　that　isn't　clear　we　can　speak。
Promise　me　that　you'll　speak。〃

〃I　will；　Alice。　　But　after　this　all　will　be　clear。　　We　shall　deal　with
each　other　as　we　do　with　ourselves。〃

〃Yes；　that　will　be　the　way。〃

〃And　we　mustn't　wait　for　question　from　each　other。　　We　shall　knowwe
shall　feelwhen　there's　any　misgiving；　and　then　the　one　that's　caused　it
will　speak。〃

〃Yes；〃　she　sighed　emphatically。　　〃How　perfectly　you　say　it？　　But　that's
because　you　feel　it；　because　you　are　good。〃

They　walked　on；　treading　the　air　in　a　transport　of　fondness　for　each
other。　　Suddenly　he　stopped。

〃Miss　Pasmer；　I　feel　it　my　duty　to　warn　you　that　you're　letting　me　go
home　with　you。〃

〃Am　I？　　How　noble　of　you　to　tell　me；　Dan；　for　I　know　you　don't　want　to
tell。　　Well；　I　might　as　well。　　But　I　sha'n't　let　you　come　in。　　You　won't
try；　will　you？　　Promise　me　you　won't　try。〃

〃I　shall　only　want　to　come　in　the　first　door。〃

〃What　for？〃

〃What　for？　　Oh；　for　half　a　second。〃

She　turned　away　her　face。

He　went　on。　　〃This　engagement　has　been　such　a　very　public　affair；　so　far；
that　I　think　I'd　like　to　see　my　fiancee　alone　for　a　moment。〃

〃I　don't　know　what　in　the　world　you　can　have　to　say　more。〃

He　went　into　the　first　door　with　her；　and　then　he　went　with　her　upstairs
to　the　door　of　Mrs。　Pasmer's　apartment。　　The　passages　of　the　Cavendish
were　not　well　lighted；　the　little　lane　or　alley　that　led　down　to　this
door　from　the　stairs　landing　was　very　dim。

〃So　dark　here！〃　murmured　Alice；　in　a　low　voice；　somewhat　tremulous。

〃But　not　too　dark。〃




XXV。

She　burst　into　the　room　where　her　mother　sat　looking　over　some
housekeeping　accounts。　　His　kiss　and　his　name　were　upon　her　lips；　her
soul　was　full　of　him。

〃Mamma！〃　she　panted。

Her　mother　did　not　look　round。　　She　could　have　had　no　premonition　of　the
vital　news　that　her　daughter　was　bringing；　and　she　went　on　comparing　the
first　autumn　month's　provision　bill　with　that　of　the　last　spring　month；
and　trying　to　account　for　the　difference。

The　silence；　broken　by　the　rattling　of　the　two　bills　in　her　mother's
hands　as　she　glanced　from　one　to　the　other　through　her　glasses；　seemed
suddenly　impenetrable；　and　the　prismatic　world　of　the　girl's　rapture
burst　like　a　bubble　against　it。　　There　is　no　explanation　of　the　effect
outside　of　temperament　and　overwrought　sensibilities。　　She　stared　across
the　room　at　her　mother；　who　had　not　heard　her；　and　then　she　broke　into　a
storm　of　tears。

〃Alice！〃　cried　her　mother；　with　that　sanative　anger　which　comes　to　rescue
women　from　the　terror　of　any　sudden　shock。　　〃What　is　the　matter　with
you？what　do　you　mean？〃　She　dropped　both　of　the　provision　bills　to　the
floor；　and　started　toward　her　daughter。

〃Nothingnothing！　　Let　me　go。　　I　want　to　go　to　my　room。〃　　She　tried　to
reach　the　door　beyond　her　mother。

〃Indeed　you　shall　not！〃　cried　Mrs。　Pasmer。　　〃I　will　not　have　you　behaving
so！　　What　has　happened　to　you？〃　　Tell　me。　　You　have　frightened　me　half
out　of　my　senses。〃

The　girl　gave　up　her　efforts　to　escape；　and　flung　herself　on　the　sofa；
with　her　face　in　the　pillow；　where　she　continued　to　sob。　　Her　mother
began　to　relent　at　the　sight　of　her　passion。　　As　a　woman　and　as　a　mother
she　knew　her　daughter；　and　she　knew　that　this　passion；　whatever　it　was；
must　have　vent　before　there　could　be　anything　intelligible　between　them。
She　did　not　press　her　with　further　question；　but　set　about　making　her　a
little　more　comfortable　on　the　sofa；　she　pulled　the　pillow　straight；　and
dropped　a　light　shawl　over　the　girl's　shoulders；　so　that　she　should　not
take　cold。

Then　Mrs。　Pasmer　had　made　up　her　mind　that　Alice　had　met　Mavering
somewhere；　and　that　this　outburst　was　the　retarded　effect　of　seeing　him。
During　the　last　six　weeks　she　had　assisted　at　many　phases　of　feeling　in
regard　to　him；　and　knew　more　clearly　than　Alice　herself　the　meaning　of
them　all。　She　ha