tales for fifteen-第22节

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meant　every　thing　or　nothing。　The　slight　tinge　that
usually　was　seated　on　her　cheek　spreading　over　its
whole　surface　like　the　faintest　glow　of　sunset
blending；　by　mellow　degrees；　with　the　surrounding
clouds；　was　heightened　to　richness；　and　even
diffused　itself　like　a　reflection；　across　her　polished
forehead；　because　she　believed　she　was　about　to
listen　to　a　declaration　that　her　years　and　her
education　united　to　tell　her　was　never　to　approach
female　ears　without　slightly　trespassing　on　the
delicacy　of　her　sex。　Her　mild　blue　eyes；　beaming
with　the　glow　on　her　face；　rose　and　fell　from　the
carpet　to　the　countenance　of　Delafield；　but　chiefly
dwelt　in　open　charity；　and　possibly　in　anxiety；　on
his　own。　In　fact；　there　was　thrown　around　her　whole
air；　such　a　touch　of　exquisite　and　shrinking
delicacy；　so　blended　with　feeling　benevolence；　and
even　tender　interest；　that　it　was　no　wonder　that　a
man；　handsome　to　perfection；　young；　intelligent；
and　rich；　mistook　her　feelings。

〃Pardon　me；　Miss　Henley；〃　he　cried；　and　the
apology　was　unconsciously　paid　to　the　commanding
purity　and　dignity　of　her　air；　〃if　I　overstep　the　rules
of　decorum；　and　hasten　to　declare　that　which　I
know　years　of　trial　would　hardly　justify　my　saying；
but　your　beauty；　your　grace；　youryourwhere
shall　I　find　words　to　express　it？your　loveliness；
yes；　that　means　every　thingyour　loveliness　has
not　been　seen　with　impunity。〃

This　might　have　done　very　well　for　a　sudden　and
unprepared　declaration；　but　being　a　little　indefinite；
it　failed　to　extract　a　reply；　his　listener　giving　a
respectful；　and；　at　times；　a　rather　embarrassing
attention　to　what　he　was　to　add。　After　a　short
pause；　the　youth；　who　found　words　as　he
proceeded；　and　with　whom；　as　with　all　others；　the
first　speech　was　the　most　difficult；　continued

〃I　have　known　you　but　a　short　time；　Miss　Henley；
but　to　see　you　once　is　to　see　you　always。　You
smile；　Miss　Henley；　but　give　me　leave　to　hope　that
time　and　assiduity　will　enable　me　to　bring　you　to
such　a　state　of　feeling；　that　in　some　degree；　you
may　know　how　to　appreciate　my　sensations。〃

〃If　I　smile；　Mr。　Delafield；〃　said　Charlotte　in　a　low
but　distinct　voice；　〃it　is　not　at　you；　but　at　myself。　I；
who　have　been　for　seventeen　years　constantly　with
Charlotte　Henley；　find　each　day　something　new　in
her；　not　to　admire；　but　to　reprehend。〃　She　paused　a
moment；　and　then　added；　smiling　most　sweetly　as
she　spoke；　〃I　will　not　affect　to　misunderstand　you；
Mr。　Delafield；　your　language　is　not　very　intelligible；
but　it　is　such　that　I　am　sure　you　would　not　use　to
me　if　you　were　not　serious；　and　did　not　feel；　or
rather　think　you　feel　what　you　utter。〃

〃Think　I　feel？〃　he　echoed。　〃Don't　I　know　it？　Can　I
be　mistaken　in　my　own　sentiments？　I　may　be
misled　in　yoursmay　have　flattered　myself　with
being　able　to　accomplish　that　at　some　distant　day；
which　your　obduracy　may　deny　me；　but　in　my　own
feelings　I　cannot　be　mistaken。〃

〃Not　where　they　are　so　very　new；　nay；　do　not　start
so　eagerlywhere　they　MUST　be　so　very　new。
Surely　your　fancy　only　leads　you　to　say　so　much；
and　to…morrow；　or　next　day；　your　fancy；　unless
encouraged　by　you　to　dwell　on　my　unworthy　self；
will　lead　you　elsewhere。〃

〃Now；　Miss　Henley；　what　I　most　admire　in　your
character　is　its　lovely　ingenuousness；　its　simplicity；
its　HEART；　and　I　will　own　I　did　not　expect　such　an
answer　to　a　question　put；　like　mine；　in　sincerity　and
truth。〃

〃If　I　have　failed　to　answer　any　question　you　have
put　to　me；　Mr。　Delafield；　it　is　because　I　am
unconscious　than　any　was　asked；　and　if　I　have
displayed　disengenuousness；　want　of　simplicity；　or
want　of　feeling；　it　has　been　unintentional；　I　do
assure　you；　and　only　proves　that　I　can　be　guilty　of
errors；　without　their　being　detected　by　one　who　has
known　me　so　long　and　so　intimately。〃

〃My　impetuosity　has　deceived　me　and　distressed
you；〃　said　Delafield〃I　would　have　said　that　I　love
you　ardently；　passionately；　and　constantly；　and
shall　for　ever　love　you。　I　should　have　asked　your
permission　to　say　all　this　to　your　parents；　to
entreat　them　to　permit　me　to　see　you　often；　to
address　you；　and；　if　it　were　not　impossible；　to　hope
that　in　time　they　would　consent　to　intrust　me　with
their　greatest　treasure；　and　that　you　would　not
oppose　their　decree。〃

〃This　is　certainly　asking　many　questions　in　a
breath；〃　said　Charlotte　smiling；　but　without　either
irony　or　triumph；　〃and　were　it　not　for　that　word；
breath；　I　should　experience　some　uneasiness　at
what　you　say；　I　find　great　satisfaction；　Mr。
Delafield；　in　reflecting　that　our　acquaintance　is　not
a　week　old。〃

〃A　week　is　time　enough　to　learn　to　adore　such　a
being　as　you　are；　Miss　Henley；　though　an　age　would
not　suffice　to　do　justice　to　your　merits。　Say；　have　I
your　permission　to　speak　to　your　father？　I　do　not
ask　you　yet　to　return　my　affectionnay；　I　question
if　you　can　ever　love　as　I　do。〃

〃Perhaps　not；〃　said　Charlotte；　〃I　can　love　enough　to
feel　a　great　and　deep　interest　in　those　who　are
dear　to　me；　but　I　never　yet　have　experienced　such
emotions；　as　you　describeI　believe；　in　this
particular；　you　have　formed　a　just　opinion　of　me；
Mr。　Delafield；　I　suspect　such　passions　are　not　in
the　compass　of　my　feelings。〃

〃They　are；　they　must　be；　Miss　Henley：　allow　me　to
see　you　often；　to　speak　to　your　father；　and　at　least
to　hopemay　I　not　hope　that　in　time　you　will　learn
to　think　me　a　man　to　be　trusted　with　your
happiness　as　your　husband？〃

The　quiet　which　had　governed　the　manner　of
Charlotte　during　this　dialogue；　was　sensibly
affected　by　this　appeal；　and　for　a　short　time　she
appeared　too　much　embarrassed　to　reply。　During
this　interval；　Delafield　gazed　on　her；　in　delight；　for
with　the　sanguine　feelings　of　youth；　he　interpreted
every　symptom　of　emotion　in　his　own　favour。
Finding；　however；　that　she　was　distressed　for　a
reply；　he　renewed　his　suit

〃Though　I　have　known　you　but　a　few　days；　I　feel　as
if　I　had　known　you　for　years。　There　are；　I　believe；
Miss　Henley；　spirits　in　the　world　who　commune　with
each　other　imperceptibly；　who　seem　formed　for
each　other；　and　who　know　and　love　each　other　as
by　instinct。〃

〃I　have　no　pretensions　to　belong　to　that　class；〃
said　Charlotte；　〃I　must　know　well　to　love　a　little；
but　I　trust　I　feel　kind　sentiments　to　the　whole
human　race。〃

〃Ah；　you　do　not　know　yourself。　You　have　lived　all
your　life　in　the　neighbourhood　of　that　Mr。　Morton
who　just　went　out；　and　you　feel　pity　for　his　illness。
He　does　indeed　look　very　illbut　you　have　yet　to
learn　what　it　is　to　love。　I　ask　the　high　favour　of
being　permitted　to　attempt　the　office　ofofof〃

〃Of　teaching　me！〃　said　Charlotte　with　a　smile。〃
｛sic｝

〃Nothat　word　is　too　presumptuoustoo　coarse〃

〃Hear　me；　Mr。　Delafield；〃　said　Miss　Henley　after　a
short　pause；　during　which　she　seemed　to　have
experienced　some　deep　and　perhaps　painful
emotions〃I　cannot　undertake　to　give　you　a　reason
for　my　conductvery　possibly　I　have　no　good　one；
but　I　feel　that　I　should　be　doing　you　injustice　by
encouraging　what　you　are　pleased　to　call　hopesI
wish　to　be　understood　now；　as　saying　that　I　cannot
consent　to　your　expecting　that　I　should　ever
become　your　wife。〃

Delafield　was　certainly　astonished　at　this　refusal；
which　was　given　in　that　still；　decided　manner　that
admits　of　little　opposition。　He　had　long　been
accustomed　to　apprehend　a　sudden　acceptance；　and
had　been　in　the　habit　of　strictly　guarding　both　his
manner　and　his　language；　lest　something　that　he
did　or　said　might　justify　expectations　that　would
have　been　out　of　his　power　to　fulfil；　but　now；　when；
for　the　first　time；　he　had　ventured　a　direct　offer；　he
met　with　a　rejection　that　possessed　all　the
characteristics　of　sincerity；　he　was；　in　truth；　utterly
astounded。　After　taking　a　sufficient　time　to　collect
in　some　degree　his　faculties；　he　came　to　the
conclusion　that　he　had　been　too　precipitate；　and
had　urged　the　suit　too　far；　and　too　hastily。

〃Such　may　be　your　sentiments　now；　Miss　Henley；〃
he　said；　〃but　you　may　alter　them　in　time：　you　are
not　called　on　for　a　definite　answer。〃

〃If　not　by　you；　I　am　by　truth；　Mr。　Delafield。　It　would
be　wrong　to　lead　you　to　expect　what　can　never〃

〃Never？〃　said　Delafield〃you　cannot　speak　so
decidedly。〃

〃I　do；　indeed　I　do；〃　returned　Charlotte　firmly。

〃I　have　not　deceived　myself　in　believing　you　to　be
disengaged；　Miss　Henley？〃

〃You　have　a　right　to　require　a　definite　answer　to
your　questions；　Mr。　Delafield；　but　you　have　no　right
to　exact　my　reasons　for　declining　your　very
flattering　offerI　am　young；　very　youngbut　I　know
what　is　due　to　myself　and　to　my　sex〃

〃By　heavens！　my　suspicion　is　trueyou　are　already
betrothed！〃

〃It　would　be　easy　to　say　NO　to　that　assertion；　sir；〃
added　Charlotte；　rising；　〃but　your　right　to　a　reason
in　a　matter　where　inclination　is　so　material；　is
exactly　the　same　as　my　right　would　be　to　ask　you
why　you　did　not　address　me。　I　thank　you　for　the
preference　you　have　shown　me；　Mr。　Delafield。　I
have　not　so　little　of　the　woman　about　me；　not　to
remember　it　always　with　gratitude；　but　I　tell　you
plainly　and　firmly；　for　it　is　necessary　that　I　should
do　soI　never　can　consent　to　receive　your
proposals。〃

〃I　understand　you；　madamI　understand　you；〃　said
the　youn