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mark twain, a biography, 1900-1907-µÚ12½Ú

С˵£º mark twain, a biography, 1900-1907 ×ÖÊý£º ÿҳ4000×Ö

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But¡¡a¡¡much¡¡more¡¡conspicuous¡¡comment¡¡on¡¡the¡¡Philippine¡¡policy¡¡was¡¡the¡¡so¡­
called¡¡¡¨Defense¡¡of¡¡General¡¡Funston¡¨¡¡for¡¡what¡¡Funston¡¡himself¡¡referred¡¡to
as¡¡a¡¡¡¨dirty¡¡Irish¡¡trick¡¨£»¡¡that¡¡is¡¡to¡¡say£»¡¡deception¡¡in¡¡the¡¡capture¡¡of
Aguinaldo¡£¡¡¡¡Clemens£»¡¡who¡¡found¡¡it¡¡hard¡¡enough¡¡to¡¡reconcile¡¡himself¡¡to¡­
any¡¡form¡¡of¡¡warfare£»¡¡was¡¡especially¡¡bitter¡¡concerning¡¡this¡¡particular
campaign¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡article¡¡appeared¡¡in¡¡the¡¡North¡¡American¡¡Review¡¡for¡¡May£»
1902£»¡¡and¡¡stirred¡¡up¡¡a¡¡good¡¡deal¡¡of¡¡a¡¡storm¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡wrote¡¡much¡¡more¡¡on¡¡the
subjectvery¡¡much¡¡morebut¡¡it¡¡is¡¡still¡¡unpublished¡£




CCXXI

THE¡¡RETURN¡¡OF¡¡THE¡¡NATIVE

One¡¡day¡¡in¡¡April£»¡¡1902£»¡¡Samuel¡¡Clemens¡¡received¡¡the¡¡following¡¡letter¡¡from
the¡¡president¡¡of¡¡the¡¡University¡¡of¡¡Missouri£º

MY¡¡DEAR¡¡MR¡£¡¡CLEMENS£»¡¡Although¡¡you¡¡received¡¡the¡¡degree¡¡of¡¡doctor¡¡of
literature¡¡last¡¡fall¡¡from¡¡Yale£»¡¡and¡¡have¡¡had¡¡other¡¡honors¡¡conferred¡¡upon
you¡¡by¡¡other¡¡great¡¡universities£»¡¡we¡¡want¡¡to¡¡adopt¡¡you¡¡here¡¡as¡¡a¡¡son¡¡of
the¡¡University¡¡of¡¡Missouri¡£¡¡¡¡In¡¡asking¡¡your¡¡permission¡¡to¡¡confer¡¡upon¡¡you
the¡¡degree¡¡of¡¡LL¡£D¡£¡¡¡¡the¡¡University¡¡of¡¡Missouri¡¡does¡¡not¡¡aim¡¡to¡¡confer¡¡an
honor¡¡upon¡¡you¡¡so¡¡much¡¡as¡¡to¡¡show¡¡her¡¡appreciation¡¡of¡¡you¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡rules¡¡of
the¡¡University¡¡forbid¡¡us¡¡to¡¡confer¡¡the¡¡degree¡¡upon¡¡any¡¡one¡¡in¡¡absentia¡£¡¡
I¡¡hope¡¡very¡¡much¡¡that¡¡you¡¡can¡¡so¡¡arrange¡¡your¡¡plans¡¡as¡¡to¡¡be¡¡with¡¡us¡¡on
the¡¡fourth¡¡day¡¡of¡¡next¡¡June£»¡¡when¡¡we¡¡shall¡¡hold¡¡our¡¡Annual¡¡Commencement¡£

¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡Very¡¡truly¡¡yours£»
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡R¡£¡¡H¡£¡¡JESSE¡£


Clemens¡¡had¡¡not¡¡expected¡¡to¡¡make¡¡another¡¡trip¡¡to¡¡the¡¡West£»¡¡but¡¡a
proffered¡¡honor¡¡such¡¡as¡¡this¡¡from¡¡one's¡¡native¡¡State¡¡was¡¡not¡¡a¡¡thing¡¡to
be¡¡declined¡£

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the¡¡train¡¡there¡¡by¡¡his¡¡old¡¡river¡¡instructor¡¡and¡¡friend£»¡¡Horace¡¡Bixbyas
fresh£»¡¡wiry£»¡¡and¡¡capable¡¡as¡¡he¡¡had¡¡been¡¡forty¡­five¡¡years¡¡before¡£

¡¨I¡¡have¡¡become¡¡an¡¡old¡¡man¡£¡¡¡¡You¡¡are¡¡still¡¡thirty¡­five£»¡¨¡¡Clemens¡¡said¡£

They¡¡went¡¡to¡¡the¡¡Planters¡¡Hotel£»¡¡and¡¡the¡¡news¡¡presently¡¡got¡¡around¡¡that
Mark¡¡Twain¡¡was¡¡there¡£¡¡¡¡There¡¡followed¡¡a¡¡sort¡¡of¡¡reception¡¡in¡¡the¡¡hotel
lobby£»¡¡after¡¡which¡¡Bixby¡¡took¡¡him¡¡across¡¡to¡¡the¡¡rooms¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Pilots
Association£»¡¡where¡¡the¡¡rivermen¡¡gathered¡¡in¡¡force¡¡to¡¡celebrate¡¡his
return¡£¡¡¡¡A¡¡few¡¡of¡¡his¡¡old¡¡comrades¡¡were¡¡still¡¡alive£»¡¡among¡¡them¡¡Beck
Jolly¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡same¡¡afternoon¡¡he¡¡took¡¡the¡¡train¡¡for¡¡Hannibal¡£

It¡¡was¡¡a¡¡busy¡¡five¡¡days¡¡that¡¡he¡¡had¡¡in¡¡Hannibal¡£¡¡¡¡High¡­school
commencement¡¡day¡¡came¡¡first¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡attended£»¡¡and¡¡willingly£»¡¡or¡¡at¡¡least
patiently£»¡¡sat¡¡through¡¡the¡¡various¡¡recitals¡¡and¡¡orations¡¡and
orchestrations£»¡¡dreaming¡¡and¡¡remembering£»¡¡no¡¡doubt£»¡¡other¡¡high¡­school
commencements¡¡of¡¡more¡¡than¡¡half¡¡a¡¡century¡¡before£»¡¡seeing¡¡in¡¡some¡¡of¡¡those
young¡¡people¡¡the¡¡boys¡¡and¡¡girls¡¡he¡¡had¡¡known¡¡in¡¡that¡¡vanished¡¡time¡£¡¡¡¡A
few¡¡friends¡¡of¡¡his¡¡youth¡¡were¡¡still¡¡there£»¡¡but¡¡they¡¡were¡¡among¡¡the
audience¡¡now£»¡¡and¡¡no¡¡longer¡¡fresh¡¡and¡¡looking¡¡into¡¡the¡¡future¡£¡¡¡¡Their
heads¡¡were¡¡white£»¡¡and£»¡¡like¡¡him£»¡¡they¡¡were¡¡looking¡¡down¡¡the¡¡recorded
years¡£¡¡¡¡Laura¡¡Hawkins¡¡was¡¡there¡¡and¡¡Helen¡¡Kercheval¡¡£¨Mrs¡£¡¡Frazer¡¡and¡¡Mrs¡£
Garth¡¡now£©£»¡¡and¡¡there¡¡were¡¡others£»¡¡but¡¡they¡¡were¡¡few¡¡and¡¡scattering¡£

He¡¡was¡¡added¡¡to¡¡the¡¡program£»¡¡and¡¡he¡¡made¡¡himself¡¡as¡¡one¡¡of¡¡the¡¡graduates£»
and¡¡told¡¡them¡¡some¡¡things¡¡of¡¡the¡¡young¡¡people¡¡of¡¡that¡¡earlier¡¡time¡¡that
brought¡¡their¡¡laughter¡¡and¡¡their¡¡tears¡£

He¡¡was¡¡asked¡¡to¡¡distribute¡¡the¡¡diplomas£»¡¡and¡¡he¡¡undertook¡¡the¡¡work¡¡in¡¡his
own¡¡way¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡took¡¡an¡¡armful¡¡of¡¡them¡¡and¡¡said¡¡to¡¡the¡¡graduates£º

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good¡¡one¡£¡¨

So¡¡each¡¡took¡¡one¡¡¡¨unsight¡¡and¡¡unseen¡¨¡¡aid¡¡made¡¡the¡¡more¡¡exact
distributions¡¡among¡¡themselves¡¡later¡£

Next¡¡morning¡¡it¡¡was¡¡Saturdayhe¡¡visited¡¡the¡¡old¡¡home¡¡on¡¡Hill¡¡Street£»¡¡and
stood¡¡in¡¡the¡¡doorway¡¡all¡¡dressed¡¡in¡¡white¡¡while¡¡a¡¡battalion¡¡of
photographers¡¡made¡¡pictures¡¡of¡¡¡¨this¡¡return¡¡of¡¡the¡¡native¡¨¡¡to¡¡the
threshold¡¡of¡¡his¡¡youth¡£¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡

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¡¨a¡¡boy's¡¡home¡¡is¡¡a¡¡big¡¡place¡¡to¡¡him¡£¡¡¡¡I¡¡suppose¡¡if¡¡I¡¡should¡¡come¡¡back
again¡¡ten¡¡years¡¡from¡¡now¡¡it¡¡would¡¡be¡¡the¡¡size¡¡of¡¡a¡¡birdhouse¡£¡¨

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the¡¡window¡¡down¡¡in¡¡the¡¡back¡¡yard¡¡where£»¡¡nearly¡¡sixty¡¡years¡¡before£»¡¡Tom
Sawyer£»¡¡Huck¡¡Finn£»¡¡Joe¡¡Harper£»¡¡and¡¡the¡¡restthat¡¡is¡¡to¡¡say£»¡¡Tom
Blankenship£»¡¡John¡¡Briggs£»¡¡Will¡¡Pitts£»¡¡and¡¡the¡¡Bowen¡¡boysset¡¡out¡¡on
their¡¡nightly¡¡escapades¡£¡¡¡¡Of¡¡that¡¡lightsome¡¡band¡¡Will¡¡Pitts¡¡and¡¡John
Briggs¡¡still¡¡remained£»¡¡with¡¡half¡¡a¡¡dozen¡¡othersschoolmates¡¡of¡¡the¡¡less
adventurous¡¡sort¡£¡¡¡¡Buck¡¡Brown£»¡¡who¡¡had¡¡been¡¡his¡¡rival¡¡in¡¡the¡¡spelling
contests£»¡¡was¡¡still¡¡there£»¡¡and¡¡John¡¡Robards£»¡¡who¡¡had¡¡worn¡¡golden¡¡curls
and¡¡the¡¡medal¡¡for¡¡good¡¡conduct£»¡¡and¡¡Ed¡¡Pierce¡£¡¡¡¡And¡¡while¡¡these¡¡were
assembled¡¡in¡¡a¡¡little¡¡group¡¡on¡¡the¡¡pavement¡¡outside¡¡the¡¡home¡¡a¡¡small¡¡old
man¡¡came¡¡up¡¡and¡¡put¡¡out¡¡his¡¡hand£»¡¡and¡¡it¡¡was¡¡Jimmy¡¡MacDaniel£»¡¡to¡¡whom¡¡so
long¡¡before£»¡¡sitting¡¡on¡¡the¡¡river¡­bank¡¡and¡¡eating¡¡gingerbread£»¡¡he¡¡had
first¡¡told¡¡the¡¡story¡¡of¡¡Jim¡¡Wolfe¡¡and¡¡the¡¡cats¡£

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He¡¡was¡¡entertained¡¡that¡¡evening¡¡by¡¡the¡¡Labinnah¡¡Club¡¡£¨whose¡¡name¡¡was
achieved¡¡by¡¡a¡¡backward¡¡spelling¡¡of¡¡Hannibal£©£»¡¡where¡¡he¡¡found¡¡most¡¡of¡¡the
survivors¡¡of¡¡his¡¡youth¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡news¡¡report¡¡of¡¡that¡¡occasion¡¡states¡¡that¡¡he
was¡¡introduced¡¡by¡¡Father¡¡McLoughlin£»¡¡and¡¡that¡¡he¡¡¡¨responded¡¡in¡¡a¡¡very
humorous¡¡and¡¡touchingly¡¡pathetic¡¡way£»¡¡breaking¡¡down¡¡in¡¡tears¡¡at¡¡the
conclusion¡£¡¡¡¡Commenting¡¡on¡¡his¡¡boyhood¡¡days¡¡and¡¡referring¡¡to¡¡his¡¡mother
was¡¡too¡¡much¡¡for¡¡the¡¡great¡¡humorist¡£¡¡¡¡Before¡¡him¡¡as¡¡he¡¡spoke¡¡were¡¡sitting
seven¡¡of¡¡his¡¡boyhood¡¡friends¡£¡¨

On¡¡Sunday¡¡morning¡¡Col¡£¡¡John¡¡Robards¡¡escorted¡¡him¡¡to¡¡the¡¡various¡¡churches
and¡¡Sunday¡­schools¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡were¡¡all¡¡new¡¡churches¡¡to¡¡Samuel¡¡Clemens£»¡¡but¡¡he
pretended¡¡not¡¡to¡¡recognize¡¡this¡¡fact¡£¡¡¡¡In¡¡each¡¡one¡¡he¡¡was¡¡asked¡¡to¡¡speak
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home¡¡Sunday¡­school¡¡again£»¡¡which¡¡as¡¡a¡¡boy¡¡he¡¡had¡¡always¡¡so¡¡loved£»¡¡and¡¡he
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told¡¡a¡¡moral¡¡story¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡said£º

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story¡¡very¡¡proper¡¡for¡¡a¡¡Sunday¡­school¡£¡¡¡¡When¡¡I¡¡was¡¡a¡¡little¡¡boy¡¡in
Hannibal¡¡I¡¡used¡¡to¡¡play¡¡a¡¡good¡¡deal¡¡up¡¡here¡¡on¡¡Holliday's¡¡Hill£»¡¡which¡¡of
course¡¡you¡¡all¡¡know¡£¡¡¡¡John¡¡Briggs¡¡and¡¡I¡¡played¡¡up¡¡there¡£¡¡¡¡I¡¡don't¡¡suppose
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mind£»¡¡he¡¡had¡¡his¡¡reward¡£

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acceptability¡£

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cooper¡­shop¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡calculated¡¡that¡¡nearly¡¡three¡¡thousand¡¡Sundays¡¡had
passed¡¡since¡¡then£»¡¡and¡¡now¡¡here¡¡they¡¡were¡¡once¡¡more£»¡¡two¡¡old¡¡men¡¡with¡¡the
hills¡¡still¡¡fresh¡¡and¡¡green£»¡¡the¡¡river¡¡still¡¡sweeping¡¡by¡¡and¡¡rippling¡¡in
the¡¡sun¡£¡¡¡¡Standing¡¡there¡¡together¡¡and¡¡looking¡¡across¡¡to¡¡the¡¡low¡­lying
Illinois¡¡shore£»¡¡and¡¡to¡¡the¡¡green¡¡islands¡¡where¡¡they¡¡had¡¡played£»¡¡and¡¡to
Lover's¡¡Leap¡¡on¡¡the¡¡south£»¡¡the¡¡man¡¡who¡¡had¡¡been¡¡Sam¡¡Clemens¡¡said£º

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heaven¡£¡¡¡¡

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