three men on the bummel-第5节
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〃She's going to her people in Wales;〃 said Harris; 〃for the
holidays; with the children; we've had an invitation。〃
〃Possibly;〃 I said; 〃she'll go to Wales before she goes to
Folkestone; or maybe she'll take Wales on her way home; but she'll
want a house at Folkestone for the season; notwithstanding。 I may
be mistakenI hope for your sake that I ambut I feel a
presentiment that I'm not。〃
〃This trip;〃 said Harris; 〃is going to be expensive。〃
〃It was an idiotic suggestion;〃 I said; 〃from the beginning。〃
〃It was foolish of us to listen to him;〃 said Harris; 〃he'll get us
into real trouble one of these days。〃
〃He always was a muddler;〃 I agreed。
〃So headstrong;〃 added Harris。
We heard his voice at that moment in the hall; asking for letters。
〃Better not say anything to him;〃 I suggested; 〃it's too late to go
back now。〃
〃There would be no advantage in doing so;〃 replied Harris。 〃I
should have to get that bathroom and piano in any case now。〃
He came in looking very cheerful。
〃Well;〃 he said; 〃is it all right? Have you managed it?〃
There was that about his tone I did not altogether like; I noticed
Harris resented it also。
〃Managed what?〃 I said。
〃Why; to get off;〃 said George。
I felt the time was come to explain things to George。
〃In married life;〃 I said; 〃the man proposes; the woman submits。
It is her duty; all religion teaches it。〃
George folded his hands and fixed his eyes on the ceiling。
〃We may chaff and joke a little about these things;〃 I continued;
〃but when it comes to practice; that is what always happens。 We
have mentioned to our wives that we are going。 Naturally; they are
grieved; they would prefer to come with us; failing that; they
would have us remain with them。 But we have explained to them our
wishes on the subject; andthere's an end of the matter。〃
George said; 〃Forgive me; I did not understand。 I am only a
bachelor。 People tell me this; that; and the other; and I listen。〃
I said; 〃That is where you do wrong。 When you want information
come to Harris or myself; we will tell you the truth about these
questions。〃
George thanked us; and we proceeded with the business in hand。
〃When shall we start?〃 said George。
〃So far as I am concerned;〃 replied Harris; 〃the sooner the
better。〃
His idea; I fancy; was to get away before Mrs。 H。 thought of other
things。 We fixed the following Wednesday。
〃What about route?〃 said Harris。
〃I have an idea;〃 said George。 〃I take it you fellows are
naturally anxious to improve your minds?〃
I said; 〃We don't want to become monstrosities。 To a reasonable
degree; yes; if it can be done without much expense and with little
personal trouble。〃
〃It can;〃 said George。 〃We know Holland and the Rhine。 Very well;
my suggestion is that we take the boat to Hamburg; see Berlin and
Dresden; and work our way to the Schwarzwald; through Nuremberg and
Stuttgart。〃
〃There are some pretty bits in Mesopotamia; so I've been told;〃
murmured Harris。
George said Mesopotamia was too much out of our way; but that the
Berlin…Dresden route was quite practicable。 For good or evil; he
persuaded us into it。
〃The machines; I suppose;〃 said George; 〃as before。 Harris and I
on the tandem; J。〃
〃I think not;〃 interrupted Harris; firmly。 〃You and J。 on the
tandem; I on the single。〃
〃All the same to me;〃 agreed George。 〃J。 and I on the tandem;
Harris〃
〃I do not mind taking my turn;〃 I interrupted; 〃but I am not going
to carry George ALL the way; the burden should be divided。〃
〃Very well;〃 agreed Harris; 〃we'll divide it。 But it must be on
the distinct understanding that he works。〃
〃That he what?〃 said George。
〃That he works;〃 repeated Harris; firmly; 〃at all events; uphill。〃
〃Great Scott!〃 said George; 〃don't you want ANY exercise?〃
There is always unpleasantness about this tandem。 It is the theory
of the man in front that the man behind does nothing; it is equally
the theory of the man behind that he alone is the motive power; the
man in front merely doing the puffing。 The mystery will never be
solved。 It is annoying when Prudence is whispering to you on the
one side not to overdo your strength and bring on heart disease;
while Justice into the other ear is remarking; 〃Why should you do
it all? This isn't a cab。 He's not your passenger:〃 to hear him
grunt out:
〃What's the matterlost your pedals?〃
Harris; in his early married days; made much trouble for himself on
one occasion; owing to this impossibility of knowing what the
person behind is doing。 He was riding with his wife through
Holland。 The roads were stony; and the machine jumped a good deal。
〃Sit tight;〃 said Harris; without turning his head。
What Mrs。 Harris thought he said was; 〃Jump off。〃 Why she should
have thought he said 〃Jump off;〃 when he said 〃Sit tight;〃 neither
of them can explain。
Mrs。 Harris puts it in this way; 〃If you had said; 'Sit tight;' why
should I have jumped off?〃
Harris puts it; 〃If I had wanted you to jump off; why should I have
said 'Sit tight!'?〃
The bitterness is past; but they argue about the matter to this
day。
Be the explanation what it may; however; nothing alters the fact
that Mrs。 Harris did jump off; while Harris pedalled away hard;
under the impression she was still behind him。 It appears that at
first she thought he was riding up the hill merely to show off。
They were both young in those days; and he used to do that sort of
thing。 She expected him to spring to earth on reaching the summit;
and lean in a careless and graceful attitude against the machine;
waiting for her。 When; on the contrary; she saw him pass the
summit and proceed rapidly down a long and steep incline; she was
seized; first with surprise; secondly with indignation; and lastly
with alarm。 She ran to the top of the hill and shouted; but he
never turned his head。 She watched him disappear into a wood a
mile and a half distant; and then sat down and cried。 They had had
a slight difference that morning; and she wondered if he had taken
it seriously and intended desertion。 She had no money; she knew no
Dutch。 People passed; and seemed sorry for her; she tried to make
them understand what had happened。 They gathered that she had lost
something; but could not grasp what。 They took her to the nearest
village; and found a policeman for her。 He concluded from her
pantomime that some man had stolen her bicycle。 They put the
telegraph into operation; and discovered in a village four miles
off an unfortunate boy riding a lady's machine of an obsolete
pattern。 They brought him to her in a cart; but as she did not
appear to want either him or his bicycle they let him go again; and
resigned themselves to bewilderment。
Meanwhile; Harris continued his ride with much enjoyment。 It
seemed to him that he had suddenly become a stronger; and in every
way a more capable cyclist。 Said he to what he thought was Mrs。
Harris:
〃I haven't felt this machine so light for months。 It's this air; I
think; it's doing me good。〃
Then he told her not to be afraid; and he would show her how fast
he COULD go。 He bent down over the handles; and put his heart into
his work。 The bicycle bounded over the road like a thing of life;
farmhouses and churches; dogs and chickens came to him and passed。
Old folks stood and gazed at him; the children cheered him。
In this way he sped merrily onward for about five miles。 Then; as
he explains it; the feeling began to grow upon him that something
was wrong。 He was not surprised at the silence; the wind was
blowing strongly; and the machine was rattling a good deal。 It was
a sense of void that came upon him。 He stretched out his hand
behind him; and felt; there was nothing there but space。 He
jumped; or rather fell off; and looked back up the road; it
stretched white and straight through the dark wood; and not a
living soul could be seen upon it。 He remounted; and rode back up
the hill。 In ten minutes he came to where the road broke into
four; there he dismounted and tried to remember which fork he had
come down。
While he was deliberating a man passed; sitting sideways on a
horse。 Harris stopped him; and explained to him that he had lost
his wife。 The man appeared to be neither surprised nor sorry for
him。 While they were talking another farmer came along; to whom
the first man explained the matter; not as an accident; but as a
good story。 What appeared to surprise the second man most was that
Harris should be making a fuss about the thing。 He could get no
sense out of either of them; and cursing them he mounted his
machine again; and took the middle road on chance。 Half…way up; he
came upon a party of two young women with one young man between
them。 They appeared to be making the most of him。 He asked them
if they had seen his wife。 They asked him what she was like。 He
did not know enough Dutch to describe her properly; all he could
tell them was she was a very beautiful woman; of medium size。
Evidently this did not satisfy them; the description was too
general; any man could say that; and by this means perhaps get
possession of a wife that did not belong to him。 Th