bleak house(凄凉的房子)-第268节
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goodness of all about me； I derived such consolation as I can
I
never think of unmoved。 I have already said so much of
myself； and so much still remains； that I will not dwell upon my
sorrow。 I had an illness； but it was not a long one； and I would
avoid even this mention of it； if I could quite keep down the
recollection of their sympathy。
I proceed to other passages of my narrative。
During the time of my illness； we were still in London； where
Mrs Woodcourt had come； on my Guardian’s invitation； to stay
with us。 When my Guardian thought me well and cheerful enough
to talk with him in our old way—though I could have done that
sooner； if he would have believed me—I resumed my work； and
my chair beside his。 He had appointed the time himself； and we
were alone。
“Dame Trot；” said he； receiving me with a kiss； “welcome to the
Growlery again； my dear。 I have a scheme to develop； little
woman。 I purpose to remain here； perhaps for six months； perhaps
for a longer time—as it may be。 Quite to settle here for a while； in
short。”
“And in the meanwhile leave Bleak House？” said I。
“Aye； my dear？ Bleak House；” he returned； “must learn to take
care of itself。”
I thought his tone sounded sorrowful； but； looking at him； I saw
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his kind face lighted up by its pleasantest smile。
“Bleak House；” he repeated； and his tone did not sound
sorrowful； I found； “must learn to take care of itself。 It is a long
way from Ada； my dear； and Ada stands much in need of you。”
“It is like you； Guardian；” said I； “to have been taking that into
consideration； for a happy surprise to both of us。”
“Not so disinterested either； my dear； if you mean to extol me
for that virtue； since； if you were generally on the road； you could
be seldom with me。 And besides； I wish to hear as much and as
often of Ada as I can； in this condition of estrangement from poor
Rick。 Not of her alone； but of him too； poor fellow。”
“Have you seen Mr Woodcourt； this morning； Guardian？”
“I see Mr Woodcourt every morning； Dame Durden。”
“Does he still say the same of Richard？”
“Just the same。 He knows of no direct bodily illness that he has；
on the contrary； he believes that he has none。 Yet he is not easy
about him； who can be？”
My dear girl had been to see us lately； every day； sometimes
twice in a day。 But we had foreseen； all along； that this would only
last until I was quite myself。 We knew full well that her fervent
heart was as full of affection and gratitude towards her cousin
John as it had ever been； and we acquitted Richard of laying any
injunctions upon her to stay away； but we knew on the other hand
that she felt it a part of her duty to him； to be sparing of her visits
at our house。 My Guardian’s delicacy had soon perceived this； and
had tried to convey to her that he thought she was right。
“Dear； unfortunate； mistaken Richard；” said I。 “When will he
awake from his delusion！”
“He is not in the way to do so now； my dear；” replied my
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Guardian。 “The more he suffers； the more averse he will be to me：
having made me the principal representative of the great occasion
of his suffering。”
I could not help adding； “So unreasonably！”
“Ah； Dame Trot； Dame Trot！” returned my Guardian； “what
shall we find reasonable in Jarndyce and Jarndyce！ Unreason and
injustice at the top； unreason and injustice at the heart and at the
bottom； unreason and injustice from beginning to end—if it ever
has an end—how should poor Rick； always hovering near it； pluck
reason out of it？ He no more gathers grapes from thorns； or figs
from thistles； than older men did； in old times。”
His gentleness and consideration for Richard； whenever we
spoke of him； touched me so； that I was always silent on this
subject very soon。
“I suppose the Lord Chancellor； and the Vice Chancellors； and
the whole Chancery battery of great guns； would be infinitely
astonished by such unreason and injustice in one of their suitors；”
pursued my Guardian。 “When those learned gentlemen begin to
raise moss…roses from the powder they sow in their wigs； I shall
begin to be astonished too！”
He checked himself in glancing towards the window to look
where the wind was； and leaned on the back of my chair instead。
“Well； well； little woman！ To go on； my dear。 This rock we must
leave to time； chance； and hopeful circumstance。 We must not
shipwreck Ada upon it。 She cannot afford； and he cannot afford；
the remotest chance of another separation from a friend。
Therefore； I have particularly begged of Woodcourt； and I now
particularly beg of you； my dear； not to move this subject with
Rick。 Let it rest。 Next week； next month； next year； sooner or later；
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he will see me with clearer eyes。 I can wait。”
But I had already discussed it with him； I confessed； and so； I
thought； had Mr Woodcourt。
“So he tells me；” returned my Guardian。 “Very good。 He has
made his protest； and Dame Durden has made hers； and there is
nothing more to be said about it。 Now； I come to Mrs Woodcourt。
How do you like her； my dear？”
In answer to this question； which was oddly abrupt； I said I
liked her very much； and thought she was more agreeable than
she used to be。
“I think so too；” said my Guardian。 “Less pedigree？ Not so
much of Morgan…ap—what’s his name？”
That was what I meant； I acknowledged； though he was a very
harmless person； even when we had had more of him。
“Still； upon the whole； he is as well in his native mountains；”
said my Guardian。 “I agree with you。 Then； little woman； can I do
better for a time than retain Mrs Woodcourt here？”
No。 And yet—My Guardian looked at me； waiting for what I had
to say。
I had nothing to say。 At least I had nothing in my mind that I
could say。 I had an undefined impression that it might have been
better if we had had some other inmate； but I could hardly have
explained why； even to myself。 Or； if to myself； certainly not to
anybody else。
“You see；” said my Guardian； “our neighbourhood is in
Woodcourt’s way； and he can come here to see her as often as he
likes； which is agreeable to them both； and she is familiar to us；
and fond of you。
Yes。 That was undeniable。 I had nothing to say against it。 I
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could not have suggested a better arrangement； but I was not
quite easy in my mind。 Esther； Esther； why not？ Esther； think！
“It is a very good plan indeed； dear Guardian； and we could not
do better。”
“Sure； little woman？”
Quite sure。 I had had a moment’s time to think； since I had
urged that duty on myself； and I was quite sure。
“Good；” said my Guardian。 “It shall be done。 Carried
unanimously。”
“Carried unanimously；” I repeated； going on with my work。
It was a cover for his book…table that I happened to be
ornamenting。 It had been laid by on the night preceding my sad
journey； and never resumed。 I showed it to him now； and he
admired it h
