half a life-time ago-第10节
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itself does not seem to be of sufficient importance to call out the
requisite energy。 On the contrary; Susan exerted herself to avoid
change and variety。 She had a morbid dread of new faces; which
originated in her desire to keep poor dead Willie's state a profound
secret。 She had a contempt for new customs; and; indeed; her old
ways prospered so well under her active hand and vigilant eye; that
it was difficult to know how they could be improved upon。 She was
regularly present in Coniston market with the best butter and the
earliest chickens of the season。 Those were the common farm produce
that every farmer's wife about had to sell; but Susan; after she had
disposed of the more feminine articles; turned to on the man's side。
A better judge of a horse or cow there was not in all the country
round。 Yorkshire itself might have attempted to jockey her; and
would have failed。 Her corn was sound and clean; her potatoes well
preserved to the latest spring。 People began to talk of the hoards
of money Susan Dixon must have laid up somewhere; and one young
ne'er…do…weel of a farmer's son undertook to make love to the woman
of forty; who looked fifty…five; if a day。 He made up to her by
opening a gate on the road…path home; as she was riding on a bare…
backed horse; her purchase not an hour ago。 She was off before him;
refusing his civility; but the remounting was not so easy; and rather
than fail she did not choose to attempt it。 She walked; and he
walked alongside; improving his opportunity; which; as he vainly
thought; had been consciously granted to him。 As they drew near Yew
Nook; he ventured on some expression of a wish to keep company with
her。 His words were vague and clumsily arranged。 Susan turned round
and coolly asked him to explain himself; he took courage; as he
thought of her reputed wealth; and expressed his wishes this second
time pretty plainly。 To his surprise; the reply she made was in a
series of smart strokes across his shoulders; administered through
the medium of a supple hazel…switch。
〃Take that!〃 said she; almost breathless; 〃to teach thee how thou
darest make a fool of an honest woman old enough to be thy mother。
If thou com'st a step nearer the house; there's a good horse…pool;
and there's two stout fellows who'll like no better fun than ducking
thee。 Be off wi' thee!〃
And she strode into her own premises; never looking round to see
whether he obeyed her injunction or not。
Sometimes three or four years would pass over without her hearing
Michael Hurst's name mentioned。 She used to wonder at such times
whether he were dead or alive。 She would sit for hours by the dying
embers of her fire on a winter's evening; trying to recall the scenes
of her youth; trying to bring up living pictures of the faces she had
then knownMichael's most especially。 She thought it was possible;
so long had been the lapse of years; that she might now pass by him
in the street unknowing and unknown。 His outward form she might not
recognize; but himself she should feel in the thrill of her whole
being。 He could not pass her unawares。
What little she did hear about him; all testified a downward
tendency。 He dranknot at stated times when there was no other work
to be done; but continually; whether it was seed…time or harvest。
His children were all ill at the same time; then one died; while the
others recovered; but were poor sickly things。 No one dared to give
Susan any direct intelligence of her former lover; many avoided all
mention of his name in her presence; but a few spoke out either in
indifference to; or ignorance of; those bygone days。 Susan heard
every word; every whisper; every sound that related to him。 But her
eye never changed; nor did a muscle of her face move。
Late one November night she sat over her fire; not a human being
besides herself in the house; none but she had ever slept there since
Willie's death。 The farm…labourers had foddered the cattle and gone
home hours before。 There were crickets chirping all round the warm
hearth…stones; there was the clock ticking with the peculiar beat
Susan had known from her childhood; and which then and ever since she
had oddly associated within the idea of a mother and child talking
together; one loud tick; and quicka feeble; sharp one following。
The day had been keen; and piercingly cold。 The whole lift of heaven
seemed a dome of iron。 Black and frost…bound was the earth under the
cruel east wind。 Now the wind had dropped; and as the darkness had
gathered in; the weather…wise old labourers prophesied snow。 The
sounds in the air arose again; as Susan sat still and silent。 They
were of a different character to what they had been during the
prevalence of the east wind。 Then they had been shrill and piping;
now they were like low distant growling; not unmusical; but strangely
threatening。 Susan went to the window; and drew aside the little
curtain。 The whole world was whitethe air was blinded with the
swift and heavy fall of snow。 At present it came down straight; but
Susan knew those distant sounds in the hollows and gulleys of the
hills portended a driving wind and a more cruel storm。 She thought
of her sheep; were they all folded? the new…born calf; was it bedded
well? Before the drifts were formed too deep for her to pass in and
outand by the morning she judged that they would be six or seven
feet deepshe would go out and see after the comfort of her beasts。
She took a lantern; and tied a shawl over her head; and went out into
the open air。 She had tenderly provided for all her animals; and was
returning; when; borne on the blast as if some spirit…cryfor it
seemed to come rather down from the skies than from any creature
standing on earth's levelshe heard a voice of agony; she could not
distinguish words; it seemed rather as if some bird of prey was being
caught in the whirl of the icy wind; and torn and tortured by its
violence。 Again up high above! Susan put down her lantern; and
shouted loud in return; it was an instinct; for if the creature were
not human; which she had doubted but a moment before; what good could
her responding cry do? And her cry was seized on by the tyrannous
wind; and borne farther away in the opposite direction to that from
which the call of agony had proceeded。 Again she listened; no sound:
then again it rang through space; and this time she was sure it was
human。 She turned into the house; and heaped turf and wood on the
fire; which; careless of her own sensations; she had allowed to fade
and almost die out。 She put a new candle in her lantern; she changed
her shawl for a maud; and leaving the door on latch; she sallied out。
Just at the moment when her ear first encountered the weird noises of
the storm; on issuing forth into the open air; she thought she heard
the words; 〃O God! O help!〃 They were a guide to her; if words they
were; for they came straight from a rock not a quarter of a mile from
Yew Nook; but only to be reached; on account of its precipitous
character; by a round…about path。 Thither she steered; defying wind
and snow; guided by here a thorn…tree; there an old; doddered oak;
which had not quite lest their identity under the whelming mask of
snow。 Now and then she stopped to listen; but never a word or sound
heard she; till right from where the copse…wood grew thick and
tangled at the base of the rock; round which she was winding; she
heard a moan。 Into the brakeall snow in appearancealmost a plain
of snow looked on from the little eminence where she stoodshe
plunged; breaking down the bush; stumbling; bruising herself;
fighting her way; her lantern held between her teeth; and she herself
using head as well as hands to butt away a passage; at whatever cost
of bodily injury。 As she climbed or staggered; owing to the
unevenness of the snow…covered ground; where the briars and weeds of
years were tangled and matted together; her foot felt something
strangely soft and yielding。 She lowered her lantern; there lay a
man; prone on his face; nearly covered by the fast…falling flakes; he
must have fallen from the rock above; as; not knowing of the
circuitous path; he had tried to descend its steep; slippery face。
Who could tell? it was no time for thinking。 Susan lifted him up
with her wiry strength; he gave no helpno sign of life; but for all
that he might be alive: he was still warm; she tied her maud round
him; she fastened the lantern to her apron…string; she held him
tight: half…carrying; half…draggingwhat did a few bruises signify
to him; compared to dear life; to precious life! She got him through
the brake; and down the path。 There; for an instant; she stopped to
take breath; but; as if stung by the Furies; she pushed on again with
almost superhuman strength。 Clasping him round the waist; and
leaning his dead weight against the lintel of the door; she tried to
undo the lat