the village rector-第8节

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great　financier　was　a　very　small　one。　Veronique　had　had　no　means　of
judging　the　man　with　whom　she　was　to　pass　her　life。　During　his　fifty…
five　visits　he　had　let　her　see　nothing　but　the　business　man；　the
indefatigable　worker；　who　conceived　and　sustained　great　enterprises；
and　analyzed　public　affairs；　bringing　them　always　to　the　crucial　test
of　the　Bank。　Fascinated　by　the　million　offered　to　him　by　Sauviat；　he
showed　himself　generous　by　calculation。　Carried　away　by　the　interests
of　his　marriage　and　by　what　he　called　his　〃folly；〃　namely；　the　house
which　still　goes　by　the　name　of　the　hotel　Graslin；　he　did　things　on　a
large　scale。　Having　bought　horses；　a　caleche；　and　a　coupe；　he
naturally　used　them　to　return　the　wedding　visits　and　go　to　those
dinners　and　balls；　called　the　〃retours　de　noces；〃　which　the　heads　of
the　administration　and　the　rich　families　of　Limoges　gave　to　the　newly
married　pair。　Under　this　impulsion；　which　carried　him　entirely　out　of
his　natural　sphere；　Graslin　sent　to　Paris　for　a　man…cook　and　took　a
reception　day。　For　a　year　he　kept　the　pace　of　a　man　who　possesses　a
fortune　of　sixteen　hundred　thousand　francs；　and　he　became　of　course
the　most　noted　personage　in　Limoges。　During　this　year　he　generously
put　into　his　wife's　purse　every　month　twenty…five　gold　pieces　of
twenty　francs　each。

Society　concerned　itself　much　about　Veronique　from　the　day　of　her
marriage；　for　she　was　a　boon　to　its　curiosity；　which　has　little　to
feed　on　in　the　provinces。　Veronique　was　all　the　more　studied　because
she　had　appeared　in　the　social　world　like　a　phenomenon；　but　once
there；　she　remained　always　simple　and　modest；　in　the　attitude　of　a
person　who　is　observing　habits；　customs；　manners；　things　unknown　to
her；　and　endeavoring　to　conform　to　them。　Already　voted　ugly　but　well…
shaped；　she　was　now　declared　kindly　but　stupid。　She　was　learning　so
many　things；　she　had　so　much　to　hear　and　to　see　that　her　looks　and
speech　did　certainly　give　some　reason　for　this　judgment。　She　showed　a
sort　of　torpor　which　resembled　lack　of　mind。　Marriage；　that　hard
calling；　as　she　said；　for　which　the　Church；　the　Code；　and　her　mother
exhorted　her　to　resignation　and　obedience；　under　pain　of　transgressing
all　human　laws　and　causing　irreparable　evil；　threw　her　into　a　dazed
and　dizzy　condition；　which　amounted　sometimes　to　a　species　of　inward
delirium。

Silent　and　self…contained；　she　listened　as　much　to　herself　as　she　did
to　others。　Feeling　within　her　the　most　violent　〃difficulty　of
existing；〃　to　use　an　expression　of　Fontenelle's；　which　was　constantly
increasing；　she　became　terrified　at　herself。　Nature　resisted　the
commands　of　the　mind；　the　body　denied　the　will。　The　poor　creature；
caught　in　the　net；　wept　on　the　breast　of　that　great　Mother　of　the　poor
and　the　afflicted；she　went　for　comfort　to　the　Church；　her　piety
redoubled；　she　confided　the　assaults　of　the　demon　to　her　confessor；
she　prayed　to　heaven　for　succor。　Never；　at　any　period　of　her　life；　did
she　fulfil　her　religious　duties　with　such　fervor。　The　despair　of　not
loving　her　husband　flung　her　violently　at　the　foot　of　the　altar；　where
divine　and　consolatory　voices　urged　her　to　patience。　She　was　patient；
she　was　gentle；　and　she　continued　to　live　on；　hoping　always　for　the
happiness　of　maternity。

〃Did　you　notice　Madame　Graslin　this　morning？〃　the　women　would　say　to
each　other。　〃Marriage　doesn't　agree　with　her；　she　is　actually　green。〃

〃Yes；〃　some　of　them　would　reply；　〃but　would　you　give　your　daughter　to
a　man　like　Graslin？　No　woman　could　marry　him　with　impunity。〃

Now　that　Graslin　was　married；　all　the　mothers　who　had　courted　him　for
ten　years　past　pursued　him　with　sarcasms。

Veronique　grew　visibly　thinner　and　really　ugly；　her　eyes　looked　weary；
her　features　coarsened；　her　manner　was　shy　and　awkward；　she　acquired
that　air　of　cold　and　melancholy　rigidity　for　which　the　ultra…pious　are
so　often　blamed。　Her　skin　took　on　a　grayish　tone；　she　dragged　herself
languidly　about　during　this　first　year　of　married　life；　ordinarily　so
brilliant　for　a　young　wife。　She　tried　to　divert　her　mind　by　reading；
profiting　by　the　liberty　of　married　women　to　read　what　they　please。
She　read　the　novels　of　Walter　Scott；　the　poems　of　Lord　Byron；　the
works　of　Schiller　and　of　Goethe；　and　much　else　of　modern　and　also
ancient　literature。　She　learned　to　ride　a　horse；　and　to　dance　and　to
draw。　She　painted　water…colors　and　made　sepia　sketches；　turning
ardently　to　all　those　resources　which　women　employ　to　bear　the
weariness　of　their　solitude。　She　gave　herself　that　second　education
which　most　women　derive　from　a　man；　but　which　she　derived　from　herself
only。

The　natural　superiority　of　a　free；　sincere　spirit；　brought　up；　as　it
were　in　a　desert　and　strengthened　by　religion；　had　given　her　a　sort　of
untrammelled　grandeur　and　certain　needs；　to　which　the　provincial　world
she　lived　in　offered　no　sustenance。　All　books　pictured　Love　to　her；
and　she　sought　for　the　evidence　of　its　existence；　but　nowhere　could
she　see　the　passion　of　which　she　read。　Love　was　in　her　heart；　like
seeds　in　the　earth；　awaiting　the　action　of　the　sun。　Her　deep
melancholy；　caused　by　constant　meditation　on　herself；　brought　her　back
by　hidden　by…ways　to　the　brilliant　dreams　of　her　girlish　days。　Many　a
time　she　must　have　lived　again　that　old　romantic　poem；　making　herself
both　the　actor　and　the　subject　of　it。　Again　she　saw　that　island　bathed
in　light；　flowery；　fragrant；　caressing　to　her　soul。　Often　her　pallid
eyes　wandered　around　a　salon　with　piercing　curiosity。　The　men　were　all
like　Graslin。　She　studied　them；　and　then　she　seemed　to　question　their
wives；　but　nothing　on　the　faces　of　those　women　revealed　an　inward
anguish　like　to　hers；　and　she　returned　home　sad　and　gloomy　and
distressed　about　herself。　The　authors　she　had　read　in　the　morning
answered　to　the　feelings　in　her　soul；　their　thoughts　pleased　her；　but
at　night　she　heard　only　empty　words；　not　even　presented　in　a　lively
way；dull；　empty；　foolish　conversations　in　petty　local　matters；　or
personalities　of　no　interest　to　her。　She　was　often　surprised　at　the
heat　displayed　in　discussions　which　concerned　no　feeling　or　sentiment
to　her　the　essence　of　existence；　the　soul　of　life。

Often　she　was　seen　with　fixed　eyes；　mentally　absorbed；　thinking　no
doubt　of　the　days　of　her　youthful　ignorance　spent　in　that　chamber　full
of　harmonies　now　forever　passed　away。　She　felt　a　horrible　repugnance
against　dropping　into　the　gulf　of　pettiness　in　which　the　women　among
whom　she　lived　were　floundering。　This　repugnance；　stamped　on　her
forehead；　on　her　lips；　and　ill…disguised；　was　taken　for　the　insolence
of　a　parvenue。　Madame　Graslin　began　to　observe　on　all　faces　a　certain
coldness；　she　felt　in　all　remarks　an　acrimony；　the　causes　of　which
were　unknown　to　her；　for　she　had　no　intimate　friend　to　enlighten　or
advise　her。　Injustice；　which　angers　little　minds；　brings　loftier　souls
to　question　themselves；　and　communicates　a　species　of　humility　to
them。　Veronique　condemned　herself；　endeavoring　to　see　her　own　faults。
She　tried　to　be　affable；　they　called　her　false。　She　grew　more　gentle
still；　they　said　she　was　a　hypocrite；　and　her　pious　devotion　helped　on
the　calumny。　She　spent　money；　gave　dinners　and　balls；　and　they　taxed
her　with　pride。

Unsuccessful　in　all　these　attempts；　unjustly　judged；　rebuffed　by　the
petty　and　tormenting　pride　which　characterizes　provincial　society；
where　each　individual　is　armed　with　pretensions　and　their　attendant
uneasiness；　Madame　Graslin　fell　back　into　utter　solitude。　She　returned
with　eagerness　to　the　arms　of　the　Church。　Her　great　soul；　clothed　with
so　weak　a　flesh；　showed　her　the　multiplied　commandments　of　Catholicism
as　so　many　stones　placed　for　protection　along　the　precipices　of　life；
so　many　props　brought　by　charitable　hands　to　sustain　human　weakness　on
its　weary　way；　and　she　followed；　with　greater　rigor　than　ever；　even
the　smallest　religious　practices。

On　this　the　liberals　of　the　town　classed　Madame　Graslin　among　the
/devotes/；　the　ultras。　To　the　different　animosities　Veronique　had
innocently　acquired；　the　virulence　of　party　feeling　now　added　its
periodical　exasperation。　But　as　this　ostracism　took　nothing　really
from　her；　she　quietly　left　society　and　lived　in　books　which　offered
her　such　infinite　resources。　She　meditated　on　what　she　read；　she
compared　systems；　she　widened　immeasurably　the　horizons　of　her
intellect　and　the　extent　of　her　education；　in　this　way　she　opened　the
gates　of　her　soul　to　curiosity。

During　this　period　of　resolute　study；　in　which　religion　supported　and
maintained　her　mind；　she　obtained　the　friendship　of　Monsieur
Grossetete；　one　of　those　old　men　whose　mental　superiority　grows　rusty
in　provincial　life；　but　who；　when　they　come　in　contact　with　an　eager
mind；　recover　something　of　their　former　brilliancy。　The　good　man　took
an　earnest　interest　in　Veronique；　who；　to　reward　him　for　the
flattering　warmth　of　heart　which　old　men　show　to　those　they　like；
displayed　before　him；　and　for　the　first　time　in　her　life；　the
treasures　of　her　soul　and　the　acquirements　of　her　mind；　cultivated　so
secretly；　and　now　full　of　blossom。　An　extract　from　a　letter　written　by
her　about　this　time　to　Monsieur　Grossetete　will　show　the　conditi