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others　which　may　be　of　interest。　　With　the　impossibility　of　presenting
them　in　the　proper　order　and　connection；　I　have　decided；　in　order　that
the　reader　may　not　be　deprived　of　them；　to　offer　them　as　detached
anecdotes；　which　I　have　endeavored　to　class　as　far　as　possible；　according
to　the　order　of　time。




CHAPTER　XXX。

ANECDOTES　AND　INCIDENTS。

As　I　have　often…had　occasion　to　remark；　the　Emperor's　tastes　were
extremely　simple　in　everything　relating　to　his　person；　moreover；　he
manifested　a　decided　aversion　to　the　usages　of　fashion；　he　did　not　like；
so　to　speak；　to　turn　night　into　day；　as　was　done　in　the　most　of　the
brilliant　circles　of　society　in　Paris　under　the　Consulate；　and　at　the
commencement　of　the　Empire。　　Unfortunately；　the　Empress　Josephine　did　not
hold　the　same　views；　and　being　a　submissive　slave　of　fashion；　liked　to
prolong　her　evenings　after　the　Emperor　had　retired。

She　had　the　habit　of　then　collecting　around　her　her　most　intimate　ladies
and　a　few　friends；　and　giving　them　tea。　　Gaming　was　entirely　precluded
from　these　nocturnal　reunions；　of　which　conversation　was　the　only　charm。
This　conversation　of　the　highest　circles　of　society　was　a　most　agreeable
relaxation　to　the　Empress；　and　this　select　circle　assembled　frequently
without　the　Emperor　being　aware　of　it；　and　was；　in　fact；　a　very　innocent
entertainment。　　Nevertheless；　some　obliging　person　was　so　indiscreet　as
to　make　the　Emperor　a　report　concerning　these　assemblies；　containing
matters　which　roused　his　displeasure。　　He　expressed　his　dissatisfaction
to　the　Empress　Josephine；　and　from　that　time　she　retired　at　the　same　time
as　the　Emperor。

These　teas　were　then　abandoned；　and　all　persons　attached　to　the　service
of　the　Emperor　received　orders　not　to　sit　up　after　the　Emperor　retired。

As　well　as　I　remember；　this　is　how　I　heard　his　Majesty　express　himself　on
the　occasion。　　〃When　the　masters　are　asleep；　the　valets　should　retire　to
bed；　and　when　the　masters　are　awake；　the　valets　should　be　on　their　feet。〃
These　words　produced　the　intended　effect；　and　that　very　evening；　as　soon
as　the　Emperor　was　in　bed；　all　at　the　palace　retired；　and　at　half…past
eleven　no　one　was　awake　but　the　sentinels。

By　degrees；　as　always　occurs；　the　strict　observance　of　the　Emperor's
orders　was　gradually　relaxed；　still　without　the　Empress　daring　to　resume
her　nocturnal　gatherings。　　The　words　of　his　Majesty　were　not　forgotten；
however；　and　were　well　remembered　by　M。　Colas；　concierge　of　the　pavilion
of　Flora。

One　morning　about　four　o'clock；　M。　Colas　heard　an　unaccustomed　noise；
and　a　continued　movement　in　the　interior　of　the　palace；　and　supposed　from
this　that　the　Emperor　was　awake；　in　which　he　was　not　mistaken。　　He
dressed　in　all　haste；　and　had　been　ten　minutes　at　his　post　when　the
Emperor；　descending　the　staircase　with　Marshal　Duroc；　perceived　him。
His　Majesty　usually　took　pleasure　in　showing　that　he　remarked　exactness
in　fulfilling　his　orders；　therefore　he　stopped　a　moment；　and　said　to　M。
Colas；　〃Ah！　already　awake；　Colas？〃〃Yes；　Sire；　I　have　not　forgotten　that
valets　should　be　on　foot　when　the　masters　are　awake。〃〃You　have　a　good
memory；　Colas；　an　excellent　thing。〃

All　this　was　very　well；　and　the　day　began　for　M。　Colas　under　most
favorable　auspices；　but　in　the　evening　the　medal　of　the　morning　was
obliged　to　show　the　opposite　side。　　The　Emperor　went　that　morning　to
visit　the　works　on　the　canal　of　the　Ourcq。　　He　was　apparently　much
dissatisfied；　for　he　returned　to　the　palace　in　such　evident　illhumor；
that　M。　Colas；　perceiving　it；　let　these　words　escape　his　lips；　〃Il　y　a　de
l'oignon。〃　　Although　he　spoke　in　a　low　tone；　the　Emperor　heard　him；　and
turning　abruptly　to　him；　repeated　angrily；　〃Yes；　Monsieur；　you　are　not
mistaken；　il　y　a　de　l'oignon。〃　　He　then　rapidly　remounted　the　staircase；
while　the　concierge；　fearing　he　had　said　too　much；　approached　the　grand
marshal；　begging　him　to　excuse　him　to　his　Majesty；　but　he　never　had　an
idea　of　punishing　him　for　the　liberty　he　had　taken；　and　the　expression
which　had　escaped　his　lips　one　would　hardly　expect　to　find　in　the
imperial　vocabulary。


The　coming　of　the　Pope　to　Paris　for　the　purpose　of　crowning　the　Emperor
is　one　of　those　events　which　suffice　to　mark　the　grandeur　of　a　period。
The　Emperor　never　spoke　of　it　except　with　extreme　satisfaction；　and　he
wished　his　Holiness　to　be　received　with　all　the　magnificence　which　should
attend　the　founder　of　a　great　empire。　　With　this　intention　his　Majesty
gave　orders　that；　without　any　comment；　everything　should　be　furnished　not
only　that　the　Pope；　but　also　all　that　the　persons　of　his　suite；　might
demand。　　Alas！　　it　was　not　by　his　own　personal　expenses　that　the　Holy
Father　assisted　to　deplete　the　imperial　treasury

Pius　VII。　drank　only　water；　and　his　sobriety　was　truly　apostolic；　but
this　was　not　the　case　with　the　abbes　attached　to　his　service；　for　these
gentlemen　each　day　required　five　bottles　of　Chambertin　wine；　without
counting　those　of　other　kinds　and　most　expensive　liquors。

This　recalls　another　occurrence；　which；　however；　relates　only　indirectly
to　the　Pope's　stay　in　Paris。　　It　is　known　that　David　was　ordered　by　the
Emperor　to　execute　the　picture　of　the　coronation；　a　work　which　offered　an
incredible　number　of　almost　insurmountable　difficulties；　and　which　was；
in　fact；　one　of　the　masterpieces　of　the　great　painter。

At　all　events；　the　preparation　of　this　picture　gave　rise　to　controversies
in　which　the　Emperor　was　compelled　to　interfere；　and　the　case　was
serious；　as　we　shall　see；　since　a　Cardinal's　wig　was　in　question。　　David
persisted　in　not　painting　the　head　of　Cardinal　Caprara　with　a　wig；　and　on
his　part　the　Cardinal　was　not　willing　to　allow　him　to　paint　his　head
without　the　wig。　　Some　took　sides　with　the　painter；　some　with　the　model；
and　though　the　affair　was　treated　with　much　diplomacy；　no　concession
could　be　obtained　from　either　of　the　contracting　parties；　until　at　last
the　Emperor　took　the　part　of　his　first　painter　against　the　Cardinal's
wig。　　This　recalls　the　story　of　the　artless　man　who　would　not　allow　his
head　to　be　painted　bare　because　he　took　cold　so　easily；　and　his　picture
would　be　hung　in　a　room　without　a　fire。


When　M。　de　Bourrienne　left　the　Emperor；　as　is　well　known；　he　was　replaced
by　M。　de　Meneval；　who　had　been　formerly　in　the　service　of　Prince　Joseph。
The　Emperor　became　more　and　more　attached　to　his　new　private　secretary　in
proportion　as　he　came　to　know　him　better。　　By　degrees　the　work　of　the
cabinet；　in　which　was　transacted　the　greater　part　of　the　most　important
business；　became　so　considerable　that　it　was　impossible　for　one　man　alone
to　perform　it；　and　from　the　year　1805　two　young　men；　proteges　of　M。
Maret；　secretary　of　state；　were　admitted　to　the　honor　of　working　in　the
Emperor's　cabinet；　and　though　initiated　by　the　nature　of　their　duties
into　the　most　important　state　secrets；　there　was　never　the　slightest
reason　to　suspect　their　perfect　discretion。　　They　were；　besides；　very
diligent；　and　endowed　with　much　talent；　so　that　his　Majesty　formed　an
excellent　opinion　of　them。　　Their　position　was　most　enviable。　　Lodged　in
the　palace；　and　consequently　supplied　with　fuel　and　lights；　they　were
also　fed；　and　received　each　a　salary　of　eight　thousand　francs。　　It　might
well　have　been　thought　that　this　sum　would　be　sufficient　for　these
gentlemen　to　live　most　comfortably；　but　this　was　not　the　case。　　For　if
they　were　assiduous　during　the　hours　of　labor；　they　were　not　less　so
during　those　devoted　to　pleasure；　whence　it　arose　that　the　second　quarter
had　hardly　passed　before　the　whole　year's　salary　was　spent；　part　of　it　in
gambling；　and　the　rest　among　low　companions。

Among　the　two　secretaries　added　to　the　Emperor's　service；　there　was　one
especially　who　had　contracted　so　many　debts；　and　whose　creditors　were　so
pitiless；　that；　had　there　been　no　other　reason；　he　would　infallibly　have
been　dismissed　from　the　private　cabinet　if　the　report　of　this　had　reached
his　Majesty's　ears。

After　passing　an　entire　night　reflecting　on　his　embarrassing　position；
searching　his　imagination　to　secure　some　means　of　obtaining　the　sum
necessary　to　satisfy　those　creditors　who　were　most　importunate；　the　new
spendthrift　sought　distraction　in　work；　and　went　to　his　desk　at　five
o'clock　in　the　morning　in　order　to　drive　away　his　painful　thoughts；　not
thinking　that　at　this　hour　any　one　would　hear　him；　and　while　working
began　to　whistle　La　Linotte　with　all　his　might。　　Now；　this　morning；　as
often　before；　the　Emperor　had　already　been　working　a　whole　hour　in　his
cabinet；　and　had　just　gone　out　as　the　young　man　entered；　and；　hearing
this　whistling；　immediately　returned。

〃Already　here；　Monsieur；〃　said　his　Majesty。　　〃Zounds！　　Why；　that　is
remarkable！　　Maret　should　be　well　satisfied　with　you。　　What　is　your
salary？〃　〃Sire；　I　have　eight　thousand　francs　a　year；　and　besides　am
boarded　and　lodged　in　the　palace。〃〃That　is　well；　Monsieur；　and　you
ought　to　be　very　happy。〃

The　young　man；　seeing　that　his　Majesty　was　in　a　very　good　humor；　thought
that　fortune　had　sent　him　a　favorable　opportunity　of　being　relieved　of
his　embarrassment；　and　resolved　to　inform　the　Emperor　of　his　trying
situation。　　〃Alas；　Sire！〃　said　he；　〃no