the diary of a man of fifty-第4节

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〃Yes；　it　was　painful；　but　it　was　not　a　quarrel。　　I　went　away　one　day　

and　never　saw　her　again。　　That　was　all。〃



The　Countess　looked　at　me　gravely。　　〃What　do　you　call　it　when　a　man　

does　that？〃



〃It　depends　upon　the　case。〃



〃Sometimes；〃　said　the　Countess　in　French；　〃it's　a　lachete。〃



〃Yes；　and　sometimes　it's　an　act　of　wisdom。〃



〃And　sometimes；〃　rejoined　the　Countess；　〃it's　a　mistake。〃



I　shook　my　head。　　〃For　me　it　was　no　mistake。〃



She　began　to　laugh　again。　　〃Caro　Signore；　you're　a　great　original。　　

What　had　my　poor　mother　done　to　you？〃



I　looked　at　our　young　Englishman；　who　still　had　his　back　turned　to　us　

and　was　staring　up　at　the　picture。　　〃I　will　tell　you　some　other　

time；〃　I　said。



〃I　shall　certainly　remind　you；　I　am　very　curious　to　know。〃　　Then　she　

opened　and　shut　her　fan　two　or　three　times；　still　looking　at　me。　　

What　eyes　they　have！　　〃Tell　me　a　little；〃　she　went　on；　〃if　I　may　ask　

without　indiscretion。　　Are　you　married？〃



〃No；　Signora　Contessa。〃



〃Isn't　that　at　least　a　mistake？〃



〃Do　I　look　very　unhappy？〃



She　dropped　her　head　a　little　to　one　side。　　〃For　an　Englishmanno！〃



〃Ah；〃　said　I；　laughing；　〃you　are　quite　as　clever　as　your　mother。〃



〃And　they　tell　me　that　you　are　a　great　soldier；〃　she　continued；　〃you　

have　lived　in　India。　　It　was　very　kind　of　you；　so　far　away；　to　have　

remembered　our　poor　dear　Italy。〃



〃One　always　remembers　Italy；　the　distance　makes　no　difference。　　I　

remembered　it　well　the　day　I　heard　of　your　mother's　death！〃



〃Ah；　that　was　a　sorrow！〃　said　the　Countess。　　〃There's　not　a　day　that　

I　don't　weep　for　her。　　But　che　vuole？　　She's　a　saint　its　paradise。〃



〃Sicuro；〃　I　answered；　and　I　looked　some　time　at　the　ground。　　〃But　

tell　me　about　yourself；　dear　lady；〃　I　asked　at　last；　raising　my　eyes。　　

〃You　have　also　had　the　sorrow　of　losing　your　husband。〃



〃I　am　a　poor　widow；　as　you　see。　　Che　vuole？　　My　husband　died　after　

three　years　of　marriage。〃



I　waited　for　her　to　remark　that　the　late　Count　Scarabelli　was　also　a　

saint　in　paradise；　but　I　waited　in　vain。



〃That　was　like　your　distinguished　father；〃　I　said。



〃Yes；　he　too　died　young。　　I　can't　be　said　to　have　known　him；　I　was　

but　of　the　age　of　my　own　little　girl。　　But　I　weep　for　him　all　the　

more。〃



Again　I　was　silent　for　a　moment。



〃It　was　in　India　too；〃　I　said　presently；　〃that　I　heard　of　your　

mother's　second　marriage。〃



The　Countess　raised　her　eyebrows。



〃In　India；　then；　one　hears　of　everything！　　Did　that　news　please　you？〃



〃Well；　since　you　ask　meno。〃



〃I　understand　that；〃　said　the　Countess；　looking　at　her　open　fan。　　〃I　

shall　not　marry　again　like　that。〃



〃That's　what　your　mother　said　to　me；〃　I　ventured　to　observe。



She　was　not　offended；　but　she　rose　from　her　seat　and　stood　looking　at　

me　a　moment。　　Then〃You　should　not　have　gone　away！〃　she　exclaimed。　　

I　stayed　for　another　hour；　it　is　a　very　pleasant　house。



Two　or　three　of　the　men　who　were　sitting　there　seemed　very　civil　and　

intelligent；　one　of　them　was　a　major　of　engineers；　who　offered　me　a　

profusion　of　information　upon　the　new　organisation　of　the　Italian　

army。　　While　he　talked；　however；　I　was　observing　our　hostess；　who　was　

talking　with　the　others；　very　little；　I　noticed；　with　her　young　

Inglese。　　She　is　altogether　charmingfull　of　frankness　and　freedom；　

of　that　inimitable　disinvoltura　which　in　an　Englishwoman　would　be　

vulgar；　and　which　in　her　is　simply　the　perfection　of　apparent　

spontaneity。　　But　for　all　her　spontaneity　she's　as　subtle　as　a　

needle…point；　and　knows　tremendously　well　what　she　is　about。　　If　she　

is　not　a　consummate　coquette　。　。　。　What　had　she　in　her　head　when　she　

said　that　I　should　not　have　gone　away？Poor　little　Stanmer　didn't　go　

away。　　I　left　him　there　at　midnight。



12th。I　found　him　today　sitting　in　the　church　of　Santa　Croce；　into　

which　I　wandered　to　escape　from　the　heat　of　the　sun。



In　the　nave　it　was　cool　and　dim；　he　was　staring　at　the　blaze　of　

candles　on　the　great　altar；　and　thinking；　I　am　sure；　of　his　

incomparable　Countess。　　I　sat　down　beside　him；　and　after　a　while；　as　

if　to　avoid　the　appearance　of　eagerness；　he　asked　me　how　I　had　

enjoyed　my　visit　to　Casa　Salvi；　and　what　I　thought　of　the　padrona。



〃I　think　half　a　dozen　things；〃　I　said；　〃but　I　can　only　tell　you　one　

now。　　She's　an　enchantress。　　You　shall　hear　the　rest　when　we　have　

left　the　church。〃



〃An　enchantress？〃　repeated　Stanmer；　looking　at　me　askance。



He　is　a　very　simple　youth；　but　who　am　I　to　blame　him？



〃A　charmer；〃　I　said　〃a　fascinatress！〃



He　turned　away；　staring　at　the　altar　candles。



〃An　artistan　actress；〃　I　went　on；　rather　brutally。



He　gave　me　another　glance。



〃I　think　you　are　telling　me　all；〃　he　said。



〃No；　no；　there　is　more。〃　　And　we　sat　a　long　time　in　silence。



At　last　he　proposed　that　we　should　go　out；　and　we　passed　in　the　

street；　where　the　shadows　had　begun　to　stretch　themselves。



〃I　don't　know　what　you　mean　by　her　being　an　actress；〃　he　said；　as　we　

turned　homeward。



〃I　suppose　not。　　Neither　should　I　have　known；　if　any　one　had　said　

that　to　me。〃



〃You　are　thinking　about　the　mother；〃　said　Stanmer。　　〃Why　are　you　

always　bringing　HER　in？〃



〃My　dear　boy；　the　analogy　is　so　great　it　forces　itself　upon　me。〃



He　stopped　and　stood　looking　at　me　with　his　modest；　perplexed　young　

face。　　I　thought　he　was　going　to　exclaim〃The　analogy　be　hanged！〃

but　he　said　after　a　moment　…



〃Well；　what　does　it　prove？〃



〃I　can't　say　it　proves　anything；　but　it　suggests　a　great　many　

things。〃



〃Be　so　good　as　to　mention　a　few；〃　he　said；　as　we　walked　on。



〃You　are　not　sure　of　her　yourself；〃　I　began。



〃Never　mind　thatgo　on　with　your　analogy。〃



〃That's　a　part　of　it。　　You　ARE　very　much　in　love　with　her。〃



〃That's　a　part　of　it　too；　I　suppose？〃



〃Yes；　as　I　have　told　you　before。　　You　are　in　love　with　her；　and　yet　

you　can't　make　her　out；　that's　just　where　I　was　with　regard　to　Madame　

de　Salvi。〃



〃And　she　too　was　an　enchantress；　an　actress；　an　artist；　and　all　the　

rest　of　it？〃



〃She　was　the　most　perfect　coquette　I　ever　knew；　and　the　most　

dangerous；　because　the　most　finished。〃



〃What　you　mean；　then；　is　that　her　daughter　is　a　finished　coquette？〃



〃I　rather　think　so。〃



Stanmer　walked　along　for　some　moments　in　silence。



〃Seeing　that　you　suppose　me　to　be　aa　great　admirer　of　the　

Countess；〃　he　said　at　last；　〃I　am　rather　surprised　at　the　freedom　

with　which　you　speak　of　her。〃



I　confessed　that　I　was　surprised　at　it　myself。　　〃But　it's　on　account　

of　the　interest　I　take　in　you。〃



〃I　am　immensely　obliged　to　you！〃　said　the　poor　boy。



〃Ah；　of　course　you　don't　like　it。　　That　is；　you　like　my　interestI　

don't　see　how　you　can　help　liking　that；　but　you　don't　like　my　

freedom。　　That's　natural　enough；　but；　my　dear　young　friend；　I　want　

only　to　help　you。　　If　a　man　had　said　to　meso　many　years　agowhat　I　

am　saying　to　you；　I　should　certainly　also；　at　first；　have　thought　him　

a　great　brute。　　But　after　a　little；　I　should　have　been　gratefulI　

should　have　felt　that　he　was　helping　me。〃



〃You　seem　to　have　been　very　well　able　to　help　yourself；〃　said　

Stanmer。　　〃You　tell　me　you　made　your　escape。〃



〃Yes；　but　it　was　at　the　cost　of　infinite　perplexityof　what　I　may　

call　keen　suffering。　　I　should　like　to　save　you　all　that。〃



〃I　can　only　repeatit　is　really　very　kind　of　you。〃



〃Don't　repeat　it　too　often；　or　I　shall　begin　to　think　you　don't　mean　

it。〃



〃Well；〃　said　Stanmer；　〃I　think　this；　at　any　ratethat　you　take　an　

extraordinary　responsibility　in　trying　to　put　a　man　out　of　conceit　of　

a　woman　who；　as　he　believes；　may　make　him　very　happy。〃



I　grasped　his　arm；　and　we　stopped；　going　on　with　our　talk　like　a　

couple　of　Florentines。



〃Do　you　wish　to　marry　her？〃



He　looked　away；　without　meeting　my　eyes。　　〃It's　a　great　

responsibility；〃　he　repeated。



〃Before　Heaven；〃　I　said；　〃I　would　have　married　the　mother！　　You　are　

exactly　in　my　situation。〃



〃Don't　you　think　you　rather　overdo　the　analogy？〃　asked　poor　Stanmer。



〃A　little　more；　a　little　lessit　doesn't　matter。　　I　believe　you　are　

in　my　shoes。　　But　of　course　if　you　prefer　it；　I　will　beg　a　thousand　

pardons　and　leave　them　to　carry　you　where　they　will。〃



He　had　been　looking　away；　but　now　he　slowly　turned　his　face　and　met　

my　eyes。　　〃You　have　gone　too　far　to　retreat；　what　is　it　you　know　

about　her？〃



〃About　this　onenothing。　　But　about　the　other〃



〃I　care　nothing　about　the　other！〃



〃My　dear　fellow；〃　I　said；　〃they　are　mother　and　daughterthey　are　as　

like　as　two　of　Andrea's　Madonnas。〃



〃If　they　resemble　each　other；　then；　you　were　simply　mistaken　in　the　

mother。〃



I　took　his　arm　and　we　walked　on　again；　there　seemed　no　adequate　reply　

to　such　a　charge。　　〃Your　state　of　mind　brings　back　my　own　so　

completely；〃　I　said　presently。　　〃You　admire　her