count bunker-第1节

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Count　Bunker

by　J。　Storer　Clousten


BEING　A　BALD　YET　VERACIOUS　CHRONICLE　CONTAINING　SOME　FURTHER　PARTICULARS　OF　TWO　GENTLEMEN　WHOSE　PREVIOUS　CAREERS　WERE　TOUCHED　UPON　IN　A　TOME　ENTITLED　〃THE　LUNATIC　AT　LARGE〃

BY　J。　STORER　CLOUSTON




COUNT　BUNKER



CHAPTER　I

It　is　only　with　the　politest　affectation　of　interest；　as　a　rule；　that　English　Society　learns　the　arrival　in　its　midst　of　an　ordinary　Continental　nobleman；　but　the　announcement　that　the　Baron　Rudolph　von　Blitzenberg　had　been　appointed　attache　to　the　German　embassy　at　the　Court　of　St。　James　was　unquestionably　received　with　a　certain　flutter　of　excitement。　　That　his　estates　were　as　vast　as　an　average　English　county；　and　his　ancestry　among　the　noblest　in　Europe；　would　not　alone　perhaps　have　arrested　the　attention　of　the　paragraphists；　since　acres　and　forefathers　of　foreign　extraction　are　rightly　regarded　as　conferring　at　the　most　a　claim　merely　to　toleration。　　But　in　addition　to　these　he　possessed　a　charming　English　wife；　belonging　to　one　of　the　most　distinguished　families　in　the　peerage　（the　Grillyers　of　Monkton…Grillyer）；　and　had　further　demonstrated　his　judgment　by　purchasing　the　winner　of　the　last　year's　Derby；　with　a　view　to　improving　the　horse…　flesh　of　his　native　land。

From　a　footnote　attached　to　the　engraving　of　the　Baron　in　a　Homburg　hat　holding　the　head　of　the　steed　in　question；　which　formed　the　principal　attraction　in　several　print…sellers'　windows　in　Piccadilly；　one　gathered　that　though　his　faculties　had　been　cultivated　and　exercised　in　every　conceivable　direction；　yet　this　was　his　first　serious　entrance　into　the　diplomatic　world。　　There　was　clearly；　therefore；　something　unusual　about　the　appointment；　so　that　it　was　rumored；　and　rightly；　that　an　international　importance　was　to　be　attached　to　the　incident；　and　a　delicate　compliment　to　be　perceived　in　the　selection　of　so　popular　a　link　between　the　Anglo…Saxon　and　the　Teutonic　peoples。　　Accordingly　〃Die　Wacht　am　Rhein〃　was　played　by　the　Guards'　band　down　the　entire　length　of　Ebury　Street；　photographs　of　the　Baroness　appeared　in　all　the　leading　periodicals；　and　Society；　after　its　own　less　demonstrative　but　equally　sincere　fashion；　prepared　to　welcome　the　distinguished　visitors。

They　arrived　in　town　upon　a　delightful　day　in　July；　somewhat　late　in　the　London　season；　to　be　sure；　yet　not　too　late　to　be　inundated　with　a　snowstorm　of　cards　and　invitations　to　all　the　smartest　functions　that　remained。　　For　the　first　few　weeks；　at　least；　you　would　suppose　the　Baron　to　have　no　time　for　thought　beyond　official　receptions　and　unofficial　dinners；　yet　as　he　looked　from　his　drawing…room　windows　into　the　gardens　of　Belgrave　Square　upon　the　second　afternoon　since　they　had　settled　into　this　great　mansion；　it　was　not　upon　such　functions　that　his　fancy　ran。　　Nobody　was　more　fond　of　gaiety；　nobody　more　appreciative　of　purple　and　fine　linen；　than　the　Baron　von　Blitzenberg；　but　as　he　mused　there　he　began　to　recall　more　and　more　vividly；　and　with　an　ever　rising　pleasure；　quite　different　memories　of　life　in　London。　　Then　by　easy　stages　regret　began　to　cloud　this　reminiscent　satisfaction；　until　at　last　he　sighed

〃Ach；　my　dear　London！　　How　moch　should　I　enjoy　you　if　I　were　free！〃

For　the　benefit　of　those　who　do　not　know　the　Baron　either　personally　or　by　repute；　he　may　briefly　be　described　as　an　admirably　typical　Teuton。　　When　he　first　visited　England　（some　five　years　previously）　he　stood　for　Bavarian　manhood　in　the　flower；　now；　you　behold　the　fruit。　　As　magnificently　mustached；　as　ruddy　of　skin；　his　eye　as　genial；　and　his　impulses　as　hearty；　he　added　to…day　to　these　two　more　stone　of　Teutonic　excellences　incarnate。

In　his　ingenuous　glance；　as　in　the　more　rounded　contour　of　his　waistcoat；　you　could　see　at　once　that　fate　had　dealt　kindly　with　him。　　Indeed；　to　hear　him　sigh　was　so　unwonted　an　occurrence　that　the　Baroness　looked　up　with　an　air　of　mild　surprise。

〃My　dear　Rudolph；〃　said　she；　〃you　should　really　open　the　window。　　You　are　evidently　feeling　the　heat。〃

〃No；　not　ze　heat；〃　replied　the　Baron。

He　did　not　turn　his　head　towards　her；　and　she　looked　at　him　more　anxiously。

〃What　is　it；　then？　　I　have　noticed　a　something　strange　about　you　ever　since　we　landed　at　Dover。　　Tell　me；　Rudolph！〃

Thus　adjured；　he　cast　a　troubled　glance　in　her　direction。　　He　saw　a　face　whose　mild　blue　eyes　and　undetermined　mouth　he　still　swore　by　as　the　standard　by　which　to　try　all　her　inferior　sisters；　and　a　figure　whose　growing　embonpoint　yearly　approached　the　outline　of　his　ideal　hausfrau。　　But　it　was　either　St。　Anthony　or　one　of　his　fellow…martyrs　who　observed　that　an　occasional　holiday　from　the　ideal　is　the　condiment　in　the　sauce　of　sanctity；　and　some　such　reflection　perturbed　the　Baron　at　this　moment。

〃It　is　nozing　moch；〃　he　answered。

〃Oh；　I　know　what　it　is。　　You　have　grown　so　accustomed　to　seeing　the　same　people；　year　after　yearthe　Von　Greifners；　and　Rosenbaums；　and　all　those。　　You　miss　them；　don't　you？　　Personally；　I　think　it　a　very　good　thing　that　you　should　go　abroad　and　be　a　diplomatist；　and　not　stay　in　Fogelschloss　so　much；　and　you'll　soon　make　loads　of　friends　here。　　Mother　comes　to　us　next　week；　you　know。〃

〃Your　mozzer　is　a　nice　old　lady；〃　said　the　Baron　slowly。　　〃I　respect　her；　Alicia；　bot　it　vas　not　mozzers　zat　I　missed　just　now。〃

〃What　was　it？〃

〃Life！〃　roared　the　Baron；　with　a　sudden　outburst　of　thundering　enthusiasm　that　startled　the　Baroness　completely　out　of　her　composure。　　〃I　did　have　fun　for　my　money　vunce　in　London。　　Himmel；　it　is　too　hot　to　eat　great　dinners　and　to　vear　clothes　like　a　monkey…jack。〃

〃Like　a　what？〃　gasped　the　Baroness。

To　hear　the　Baron　von　Blitzenberg　decry　the　paraphernalia　and　splendors　of　his　official　liveries　was　even　more　astonishing　than　his　remarkable　denunciation　of　the　pleasures　of　the　table；　since　to　dress　as　well　as　play　the　part　of　hereditary　grandee　had　been　till　this　minute　his　constant　and　enthusiastic　ambition。

〃A　meat…jack；　I　meanor　aI　know　not　vat　you　call　it。　　Ach；　I　vant　a　leetle　fun；　Alicia。〃

〃A　little　fun；〃　repeated　the　Baroness　in　a　breathless　voice。　　〃What　kind　of　fun？〃

〃I　know　not；〃　said　he；　turning　once　more　to　stare　out　of　the　window。

To　this　dignified　representative　of　a　particularly　dignified　State　even　the　trees　of　Belgrave　Square　seemed　at　that　moment　a　trifle　too　conventionally　perpendicular。　　If　they　would　but　dance　and　wave　their　boughs　he　would　have　greeted　their　greenness　more　gladly。　　A　good…looking　nursemaid　wheeled　a　perambulator　beneath　their　shade；　and　though　she　never　looked　his　way；　he　took　a　wicked　pleasure　in　surreptitiously　closing　first　one　eye　and　then　the　other　in　her　direction。　　This　might　not　entirely　satisfy　the　aspirations　of　his　soul；　yet　it　seemed　to　serve　as　some　vent　for　his　pent…up　spirit。　　He　turned　to　his　spouse　with　a　pleasantly　meditative　air。

〃I　should　like　to　see　old　Bonker　vunce　more；〃　he　observed。

〃Bunker？　　You　mean　Mr。　Mandell…Essington？〃　said　she；　with　an　apprehensive　note　in　her　voice。

〃To　me　he　vill　alvays　be　Bonker。〃

The　Baroness　looked　at　him　reproachfully。

〃You　promised　me；　Rudolph；　you　would　see　as　little　as　possible　of　Mr。　Essington。〃

〃Oh；　ja；　as　leetleas　possible；〃　answered　the　Baron；　though　not　with　his　most　ingenuous　air。　　〃Besides；　it　is　tree　years　since　I　promised。　　For　tree　years　I　have　seen　nozing。　　My　love　Alicia；　you　vould　not　have　me　forget　mine　friends　altogezzer？〃

But　the　Baroness　had　too　vivid　a　recollection　of　their　last　（and　only）　visit　to　England　since　their　marriage。　　By　a　curious　coincidence　that　also　was　three　years　ago。

〃When　you　last　met　you　remember　what　happened？〃　she　asked；　with　an　ominous　hint　of　emotion　in　her　accents　。

〃My　love；　how　often　have　I　eggsplained？　　Zat　night　you　mean；　I　did　schleep　in　mine　hat　because　I　had　got　a　cold　in　my　head。　　I　vas　not　dronk；　no　more　zan　you。　　Vat　you　found　in　my　pocket　vas　a　mere　joke；　and　ze　cabman　who　called　next　day　vas　jost　vat　I　told　him　to　his　ogly　facea　blackmail。〃

〃You　gave　him　money　to　go　away。〃

〃A　Blitzenberg　does　not　bargain　mit　cabmen；〃　said　the　Baron　loftily。

His　wife's　spirits　began　to　revive。　　There　seemed　to　speak　the　owner　of　Fogelschloss；　the　haughty　magnate　of　Bavaria。

〃You　have　too　much　self…respect　to　wish　to　find　yourself　in　such　a　position　again；〃　she　said。　　〃I　know　you　have；　Rudolph！〃

The　Baron　was　silent。　　This　appeal　met　with　distinctly　less　response　than　she　confidently　counted　upon。　　In　a　graver　note　she　inquired

〃You　know　what　mother　thinks　of　Mr。　Essington？〃

〃Your　mozzer　is　a　vise　old　lady；　Alicia；　but　we　do　not　zink　ze　same　on　all　opinions。〃

〃She　will　be　exceedingly　displeased　if　youwell；　if　you　do　anything　that　she　THOROUGHLY　disapproves　of。〃

The　Baron　left　the　window　and　took　his　wife's　plump　hand　affectionately　within　his　own　broad　palm。

〃You　can　assure　her；　my　love；　zat　I　shall　never　do　vat　she　dislikes。　　You　vill　say　zat　to　her　if　she　inquires？〃

〃Can　I；　truthfully？〃

〃Ach；　my　own　dear！〃

From　his　enfolding　arms　she　whispered　tenderly

〃Of　course　I　will；　Rudolph！〃

With　a　final　hug　the　embrace　abruptly　ended；　and　the　Baron　hastily　glanced　at　his　watch。

〃Ach；　nearly　had　I　forgot！　　I　must　go　to　ze　club　for　half　an　hour。〃