the man who was afraid-第51节

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！



〃Do　it　at　once；　papa；〃　said　the　girl。

〃It　is　necessary　to　marry　you　off　the　sooner。　I　am　keeping　an　eye　on　a　certain　red…haired　fellow。　He　doesn't　seem　to　be　stupid。　He's　been　polished　abroad；　by　the　way。

〃Is　it　Smolin；　papa？〃　asked　Lubov；　inquisitively　and　anxiously。

〃And　supposing　it　is　he；　what　of　it？〃　inquired　Yakov　Tarasovich　in　a　business…like　tone。

〃Nothing；　I　don't　know　him；〃　replied　Lubov；　indefinitely。

〃We'll　make　you　acquainted。　It's　time；　Lubov；　it's　time。　Our　hopes　for　Foma　are　poor；　although　I　do　not　give　him　up。〃

〃I　did　not　reckon　on　Fomawhat　is　he　to　me？〃

〃That's　wrong。　If　you　had　been　cleverer　perhaps　he　wouldn't　have　gone　astray！　Whenever　I　used　to　see　you　together；　I　thought：　'My　girl　will　attract　the　fellow　to　herself！　That　will　be　a　fine　affair！'　But　I　was　wrong。　I　thought　that　you　would　know　what　is　to　your　advantage　without　being　told　of　it。　That's　the　way；　my　girl！〃　said　the　father；　instructively。

She　became　thoughtful　as　she　listened　to　his　impressive　speech。　Robust　and　strong；　Lubov　was　thinking　of　marriage　more　and　more　frequently　of　late；　for　she　saw　no　other　way　out　of　her　loneliness。　The　desire　to　forsake　her　father　and　go　away　somewhere　in　order　to　study　something；　to　do　something。　This　desire　she　had　long　since　overcome；　even　as　she　conquered　in　herself　many　another　longing　just　as　keen；　but　shallow　and　indefinite。　From　the　various　books　she　had　read　a　thick　sediment　remained　within　her；　and　though　it　was　something　live　it　had　the　life　of　a　protoplasm。　This　sediment　developed　in　the　girl　a　feeling　of　dis…satisfaction　with　her　life；　a　yearning　toward　personal　independence；　a　longing　to　be　freed　from　the　heavy　guardianship　of　her　father；　but　she　had　neither　the　power　to　realize　these　desires；　nor　the　clear　conception　of　their　realization。　But　nature　had　its　influence　on　her；　and　at　the　sight　of　young　mothers　with　children　in　their　arms　Lubov　often　felt　a　sad　and　mournful　languor　within　her。　At　times　stopping　before　the　mirror　she　sadly　scrutinized　in　it　her　plump；　fresh　face　with　dark　circles　around　her　eyes；　and　she　felt　sorry　for　herself。　She　felt　that　life　was　going　past　her；　forgetting　her　somewhere　on　the　side。　Now　listening　to　her　father's　words　she　pictured　to　herself　what　sort　of　man　Smolin　might　be。　She　had　met　him　when　he　was　yet　a　Gymnasium　student；　his　face　was　covered　with　freckles；　he　was　snub…nosed；　always　clean；　sedate　and　tiresome。　He　danced　heavily；　awkwardly；　he　talked　uninterestingly。　A　long　time　had　passed　since　then；　he　had　been　abroad；　had　studied　something　there；　how　was　he　now？　From　Smolin　her　thoughts　darted　to　her　brother；　and　with　a　sinking　heart　she　thought：　what　would　he　say　in　reply　to　her　letter？　What　sort　of　a　man　was　he？　The　image　of　her　brother　as　she　had　pictured　it　to　herself　prevented　her　from　seeing　both　her　father　and　Smolin；　and　she　had　already　made　up　her　mind　not　to　consent　to　marry　before　meeting　Taras；　when　suddenly　her　father　shouted　to　her：

〃Eh；　Lubovka！　Why　are　you　thoughtful？　What　are　you　thinking　of　mostly？〃

〃So；　everything　goes　so　swiftly；〃　replied　Luba；　with　a　smile。

〃What　goes　swiftly？〃

〃Everything。　A　week　ago　it　was　impossible　to　speak　with　you　about　Taras；　while　now〃

〃'Tis　need；　my　girl！　Need　is　a　power；　it　bends　a　steel　rod　into　a　spring。　And　steel　is　stubborn。　Taras；　we'll　see　what　he　is！　Man　is　to　be　appreciated　by　his　resistance　to　the　power　of　life；　if　it　isn't　life　that　wrings　him；　but　he　that　wrings　life　to　suit　himself；　my　respects　to　that　man！　Allow　me　to　shake　your　hand；　let's　run　our　business　together。　Eh；　I　am　old。　And　how　very　brisk　life　has　become　now！　With　each　succeeding　year　there　is　more　and　more　interest　in　it；　more　and　more　relish　to　it！　I　wish　I　could　live　forever；　I　wish　I　could　act　all　the　time！〃　The　old　man　smacked　his　lips；　rubbed　his　hands；　and　his　small　eyes　gleamed　greedily。

〃But　you　are　a　thin…blooded　lot！　Ere　you　have　grown　up　you　are　already　overgrown　and　withered。　You　live　like　an　old　radish。　And　the　fact　that　life　is　growing　fairer　and　fairer　is　incomprehensible　to　you。　I　have　lived　sixty…seven　years　on　this　earth；　and　though　I　am　now　standing　close　to　my　grave　I　can　see　that　in　former　years；　when　I　was　young；　there　were　fewer　flowers　on　earth；　and　the　flowers　were　not　quite　as　beautiful　as　they　are　now。　Everything　is　growing　more　beautiful！　What　buildings　we　have　now！　What　different　trade　implements。　What　huge　steamers！　A　world　of　brains　has　been　put　into　everything！　You　look　and　think；　what　clever　fellows　you　are　0h　people！　You　merit　reward　and　respect！　You've　arranged　life　cleverly。　Everything　is　good；　everything　is　pleasant。　Only　you；　our　successors；　you　are　devoid　of　all　live　feelings！　Any　little　charlatan　from　among　the　commoners　is　cleverer　than　you！　Take　that　Yozhov；　for　instance；　what　is　he？　And　yet　he　represents　himself　as　judge　over　us；　and　even　over　life　itselfhe　has　courage。　But　you；　pshaw！　You　live　like　beggars！　In　your　joy　you　are　beasts；　in　your　misfortune　vermin！　You　are　rotten！　They　ought　to　inject　fire　into　your　veins；　they　ought　to　take　your　skin　off　and　strew　salt　upon　your　raw　flesh；　then　you　would　have　jumped！〃

Yakov　Tarasovich；　small…sized；　wrinkled　and　bony；　with　black；　broken　teeth　in　his　mouth；　bald…headed　and　dark；　as　though　burned　by　the　heat　of　life　and　smoked　in　it；　trembled　in　vehement　agitation；　showering　jarring　words　of　contempt　upon　his　daughter；　who　was　young；　well…grown　and　plump。　She　looked　at　him　with　a　guilty　expression　in　her　eyes；　smiled　confusedly；　and　in　her　heart　grew　a　greater　and　greater　respect　for　the　live　old　man　who　was　so　steadfast　in　his　desires。

。。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。　　。

And　Foma　went　on　straying　and　raving；　passing　his　days　and　nights　in　taverns　and　dens；　and　mastering　more　and　more　firmly　his　contemptuously…hateful　bearing　toward　the　people　that　surrounded　him。　At　times　they　awakened　in　him　a　sad　yearning　to　find　among　them　some　sort　of　resistance　to　his　wicked　feeling；　to　meet　a　worthy　and　courageous　man　who　would　cause　him　to　blush　with　shame　by　his　burning　reproach。　This　yearning　became　clearereach　time　it　sprang　up　in　him　it　was　a　longing　for　assistance　on　the　part　of　a　man　who　felt　that　he　had　lost　his　way　and　was　perishing。

〃Brethren！〃　he　cried　one　day；　sitting　by　the　table　in　a　tavern；　half…intoxicated；　and　surrounded　by　certain　obscure　and　greedy　people；　who　ate　and　drank　as　though　they　had　not　had　a　piece　of　bread　in　their　mouths　for　many　a　long　day　before。

〃Brethren！　I　feel　disgusted。　I　am　tired　of　you！　Beat　me　unmercifully；　drive　me　away！　You　are　rascals；　but　you　are　nearer　to　one　another　than　to　me。　Why？　Am　I　not　a　drunkard　and　a　rascal　as　well？　And　yet　I　am　a　stranger　to　you！　I　can　see　I　am　a　stranger。　You　drink　out　of　me　and　secretly　you　spit　upon　me。　I　can　feel　it！　Why　do　you　do　it？〃

To　be　sure；　they　could　treat　him　in　a　different　way。　In　the　depth　of　his　soul　perhaps　not　one　of　them　considered　himself　lower　than　Foma；　but　he　was　rich；　and　this　hindered　them　from　treating　him　more　as　a　companion；　and　then　he　always　spoke　certain　comically　wrathful；　conscience…rending　words；　and　this　embarrassed　them。　Moreover；　he　was　strong　and　ready　to　fight；　and　they　dared　not　say　a　word　against　him。　And　that　was　just　what　he　wanted。　He　wished　more　and　more　intensely　that　one　of　these　people　he　despised　would　stand　up　against　him；　face　to　face；　and　would　tell　him　something　strong；　which；　like　a　lever；　would　turn　him　aside　from　the　sloping　road；　whose　danger　he　felt；　and　whose　filth　he　saw；　being　filled　with　helpless　aversion　for　it。

And　Foma　found　what　he　needed。

One　day；　irritated　by　the　lack　of　attention　for　him；　he　cried　to　his　drinking…companions：

〃You　boys；　keep　quiet；　every　one　of　you！　Who　gives　you　to　drink　and　to　eat？　Have　you　forgotten　it？　I'll　bring　you　in　order！　I'll　show　you　how　to　respect　me！　Convicts！　When　I　speak　you　must　all　keep　quiet！〃

And；　indeed；　all　became　silent；　either　for　fear　lest　they　might　lose　his　good　will；　or；　perhaps；　afraid　that　he；　that　healthy　and　strong　beast；　might　beat　them。　They　sat　in　silence　about　a　minute；　concealing　their　anger　at　him；　bending　over　the　plates　and　attempting　to　hide　from　him　their　fright　and　embarrassment。　Foma　measured　them　with　a　self…satisfied　look；　and　gratified　by　their　slavish　submissiveness；　said　boastfully：

〃Ah！　You've　grown　dumb　now；　that's　the　way！　I　am　strict！　I〃

〃You　sluggard！〃　came　some　one's　calm；　loud　exclamation。

〃Wha…at？〃　roared　Foma；　jumping　up　from　his　chair。　〃Who　said　that？〃

Then　a　certain；　strange；　shabby…looking　man　arose　at　the　end　of　the　table；　he　was　tall；　in　a　long　frock…coat；　with　a　heap　of　grayish　hair　on　his　large　head。　His　hair　was　stiff；　standing　out　in　all　directions　in　thick　locks；　his　face　was　yellow；　unshaven；　with　a　long；　crooked　nose。　To　Foma　it　seemed　that　he　resembled　a　swab　with　which　the　steamer　decks　are　washed；　and　this　amused　the　half…intoxicated　fellow。

〃How　fine！〃　said　he；　sarcastically。　〃What　are　you　snarling　at；　eh？　Do　you　know　who　I　am？〃

With　the　gesture　of　a　tragic　actor　the　man　stretched　out　to　Foma　his　hand；　with　its　long；　pliant　fingers　like　those　of　a　juggler；　and　he　said　in　a　deep　hoarse　basso：

〃You　are　the　rotten　disease　of　y