the man who was afraid-第40节

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　long　seconds　passed。　Cold；　wet　arms　clasped　his　neck　and　dark　eyes　flashed　before　him。　Then　he　understood　that　it　was　Sasha。

The　dull　horror；　which　had　suddenly　seized　him；　vanished；　replaced　now　by　wild；　rebellious　joy。　Having　dragged　the　woman　out　of　the　water；　he　grasped　her　by　the　waist；　clasped　her　to　his　breast；　and；　not　knowing　what　to　say　to　her；　he　stared　into　her　eyes　with　astonishment。　She　smiled　at　him　caressingly。

〃I　am　cold；〃　said　Sasha；　softly；　and　quivered　in　every　limb。

Foma　laughed　gaily　at　the　sound　of　her　voice；　lifted　her　into　his　arms　and　quickly；　almost　running；　dashed　across　the　rafts　to　the　shore。　She　was　wet　and　cold；　but　her　breathing　was　hot；　it　burned　Foma's　cheek　and　filled　his　breast　with　wild　joy。

〃You　wanted　to　drown　me？〃　said　she；　firmly；　pressing　close　to　him。　〃It　was　rather　too　early。　Wait！〃

〃How　well　you　have　done　it；〃　muttered　Foma；　as　he　ran。

〃You're　a　fine；　brave　fellow！　And　your　device　wasn't　bad；　either；　though　you　seem　to　be　so　peaceable。〃

〃And　they　are　still　roaring　there；　ha！　ha！〃

〃The　devil　take　them！　If　they　are　drowned；　we'll　be　sent　to　Siberia；〃　said　the　woman；　as　though　she　wanted　to　console　and　encourage　him　by　this。　She　began　to　shiver；　and　the　shudder　of　her　body；　felt　by　Foma；　made　him　hasten　his　pace。

Sobs　and　cries　for　help　followed　them　from　the　river。　There；　on　the　placid　water；　floated　in　the　twilight　a　small　island；　withdrawing　from　the　shore　toward　the　stream　of　the　main　current　of　the　river；　and　on　that　little　island　dark　human　figures　were　running　about。

Night　was　closing　down　upon　them。

CHAPTER　IX

ONE　Sunday　afternoon；　Yakov　Tarasovich　Mayakin　was　drinking　tea　in　his　garden　and　talking　to　his　daughter。　The　collar　of　his　shirt　unbuttoned；　a　towel　wound　round　his　neck；　he　sat　on　a　bench　under　a　canopy　of　verdant　cherry…trees；　waved　his　hands　in　the　air；　wiped　the　perspiration　off　his　face；　and　incessantly　poured　forth　into　the　air　his　brisk　speech。

〃The　man　who　permits　his　belly　to　have　the　upper　hand　over　him　is　a　fool　and　a　rogue！　Is　there　nothing　better　in　the　world　than　eating　and　drinking？　Upon　what　will　you　pride　yourself　before　people；　if　you　are　like　a　hog？〃

The　old　man's　eyes　sparkled　irritably　and　angrily；　his　lips　twisted　with　contempt；　and　the　wrinkles　of　his　gloomy　face　quivered。

〃If　Foma　were　my　own　son；　I　would　have　made　a　man　of　him！〃

Playing　with　an　acacia　branch；　Lubov　mutely　listened　to　her　father's　words；　now　and　then　casting　a　close　and　searching　look　in　his　agitated；　quivering　face。　Growing　older；　she　changed；　without　noticing　it；　her　suspicious　and　cold　relation　toward　the　old　man。　In　his　words　she　now　began　to　find　the　same　ideas　that　were　in　her　books；　and　this　won　her　over　on　her　father's　side；　involuntarily　causing　the　girl　to　prefer　his　live　words　to　the　cold　letters　of　the　book。　Always　overwhelmed　with　business　affairs；　always　alert　and　clever；　he　went　his　own　way　alone；　and　she　perceived　his　solitude；　knew　how　painful　it　was；　and　her　relations　toward　her　father　grew　in　warmth。　At　times　she　even　entered　into　arguments　with　the　old　man；　he　always　regarded　her　remarks　contemptuously　and　sarcastically；　but　more　tenderly　and　attentively　from　time　to　time。

〃If　the　deceased　Ignat　could　read　in　the　newspapers　of　the　indecent　life　his　son　is　leading；　he　would　have　killed　Foma！〃　said　Mayakin；　striking　the　table　with　his　fists。　〃How　they　have　written　it　up！　It's　a　disgrace！〃

〃He　deserves　it；〃　said　Lubov。

〃I　don't　say　it　was　done　at　random！　They've　barked　at　him；　as　was　necessary。　And　who　was　it　that　got　into　such　a　fit　of　anger？〃

〃What　difference　does　it　make　to　you？〃　asked　the　girl。

〃It's　interesting　to　know。　How　cleverly　the　rascal　described　Foma's　behaviour。　Evidently　he　must　have　been　with　him　and　witnessed　all　the　indecency　himself。〃

〃Oh；　no；　he　wouldn't　go　with　Foma　on　a　spree！'　said　Lubov；　confidently；　and　blushed　deeply　at　her　father's　searching　look。

〃So！　You　have　fine　acquaintances；　Lubka！　〃　said　Mayakin　with　humorous　bitterness。　〃Well；　who　wrote　it？〃

〃What　do　you　wish　to　know　it　for；　papa？〃

〃Come；　tell　me！〃

She　had　no　desire　to　tell；　but　the　old　man　persisted；　and　his　voice　was　growing　more　and　more　dry　and　angry。　Then　she　asked　him　uneasily：

〃And　you　will　not　do　him　any　ill　for　it？〃

〃I？　I　willbite　his　head　off！　Fool！　What　can　I　do　to　him？　They；　these　writers；　are　not　a　foolish　lot　and　are　therefore　a　powera　power；　the　devils！　And　I　am　not　the　governor；　and　even　he　cannot　put　one's　hand　out　of　joint　or　tie　one's　tongue。　Like　mice；　they　gnaw　us　little　by　little。　And　we　have　to　poison　them　not　with　matches；　but　with　roubles。　Yes！　Well；　who　is　it？〃

〃Do　you　remember；　when　I　was　going　to　school；　a　Gymnasium　student　used　to　come　up　to　us。　Yozhov？　Such　a　dark　little　fellow！〃

〃Mm！　Of　course；　I　saw　him。　I　know　him。　So　it's　he？〃

〃Yes。〃

〃The　little　mouse！　Even　at　that　time　one　could　see　already　that　something　wrong　would　come　out　of　him。　Even　then　he　stood　in　the　way　of　other　people。　A　bold　boy　he　was。　I　should　have　looked　after　him　then。　Perhaps；　I　might　have　made　a　man　of　him。〃

Lubov　looked　at　her　father；　smiled　inimically；　and　asked　hotly：

〃And　isn't　he　who　writes　for　newspapers　a　man？〃

For　a　long　while；　the　old　man　did　not　answer　his　daughter。　Thoughtfully；　he　drummed　with　his　fingers　against　the　table　and　examined　his　face；　which　was　reflected　in　the　brightly　polished　brass　of　the　samovar。　Then　he　raised　his　head；　winked　his　eyes　and　said　impressively　and　irritably：

〃They　are　not　men；　they　are　sores！　The　blood　of　the　Russian　people　has　become　mixed；　it　has　become　mixed　and　spoiled；　and　from　the　bad　blood　have　come　all　these　book　and　newspaper…　writers；　these　terrible　Pharisees。　They　have　broken　out　everywhere；　and　they　are　still　breaking　out；　more　and　more。　Whence　comes　this　spoiling　of　the　blood？　From　slowness　of　motion。　Whence　the　mosquitoes；　for　instance？　From　the　swamp。　All　sorts　of　uncleanliness　multiply　in　stagnant　waters。　The　same　is　true　of　a　disordered　life。〃

〃That　isn't　right；　papa！〃　said　Lubov；　softly。

〃What　do　you　mean　bynot　right？〃

〃Writers　are　the　most　unselfish　people；　they　are　noble　personalities！　They　don't　want　anythingall　they　strive　for　is　justicetruth！　They're　not　mosquitoes。〃

Lubov　grew　excited　as　she　lauded　her　beloved　people；　her　face　was　flushed；　and　her　eyes　looked　at　her　father　with　so　much　feeling；　as　though　imploring　him　to　believe　her；　being　unable　to　convince　him。

〃Eh；　you！〃　said　the　old　man；　with　a　sigh；　interrupting　her。　〃You've　read　too　much！　You've　been　poisoned！　Tell　mewho　are　they？　No　one　knows！　That　Yozhovwhat　is　he？　Only　God　knows。　All　they　want　is　the　truth；　you　say？　What　modest　people　they　are！　And　suppose　truth　is　the　very　dearest　thing　there　is？　Perhaps　everybody　is　seeking　it　in　silence？　Believe　meman　cannot　be　unselfish。　Man　will　not　fight　for　what　belongs　not　to　him；　and　if　he　does　fighthis　name　is　'fool；'　and　he　is　of　no　use　to　anybody。　A　man　must　be　able　to　stand　up　for　himself；　for　his　own；　then　will　he　attain　something！　Here　you　have　it！　Truth！　Here　I　have　been　reading　the　same　newspaper　for　almost　forty　years；　and　I　can　see　wellhere　is　my　face　before　you；　and　before　me；　there　on　the　samovar　is　again　my　face；　but　it　is　another　face。　You　see；　these　newspapers　give　a　samovar　face　to　everything；　and　do　not　see　the　real　one。　And　yet　you　believe　them。　But　I　know　that　my　face　on　the　samovar　is　distorted。　No　one　can　tell　the　real　truth；　man's　throat　is　too　delicate　for　this。　And　then；　the　real　truth　is　known　to　nobody。〃

〃Papa！〃　exclaimed　Lubov；　sadly；　〃But　in　books　and　in　newspapers　they　defend　the　general　interests　of　all　the　people。〃

〃And　in　what　paper　is　it　written　that　you　are　weary　of　life；　and　that　it　was　time　for　you　to　get　married？　So；　there　your　interest　is　not　defended！　Eh！　You！　Neither　is　mine　defended。　Who　knows　what　I　need？　Who；　but　myself；　understands　my　interests？〃

〃No；　papa；　that　isn't　right；　that　isn't　right！　I　cannot　refute　you；　but　I　feel　that　this　isn't　right！〃　said　Lubov　almost　with　despair。

〃It　is　right！〃　said　the　old　man；　firmly。　〃Russia　is　confused；　and　there　is　nothing　steadfast　in　it；　everything　is　staggering！　Everybody　lives　awry；　everybody　walks　on　one　side；　there's　no　harmony　in　life。　All　are　yelling　out　of　tune；　in　different　voices。　And　not　one　understands　what　the　other　is　in　need　of！　There　is　a　mist　over　everythingeverybody　inhales　that　mist；　and　that's　why　the　blood　of　the　people　has　become　spoiledhence　the　sores。　Man　is　given　great　liberty　to　reason；　but　is　not　permitted　to　do　anythingthat's　why　man　does　not　live；　but　rots　and　stinks。〃

〃What　ought　one　to　do；　then？〃　asked　Lubov；　resting　her　elbows　on　the　table　and　bending　toward　her　father。

〃Everything！〃　cried　the　old　man；　passionately。　〃Do　everything。　Go　ahead！　Let　each　man　do　whatever　he　knows　best！　But　for　that　liberty　must　be　given　to　mancomplete　freedom！　Since　there　has　come　a　time；　when　everyraw　youth　believes　that　he　knows　everything　and　was　created　for　the　complete　arrangement　of　life　give　him；　give　the　rogue　freedom！　Here；　Carrion；　live！　Come；　come；　live！　Ah！　Then　such　a　comedy　will　follow；　feeling　that　his　bridle　is　off；　man　will　then　rush　up　higher　than　his　ears；　and　like　a　feath