in the cage-第13节

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present；　and　that　was　easy；　since　it　proved　so　abundantly　enough

for　her　that　he　should　simply　be　where　he　was。　　〃As　we　shall　never

talk　this　way　but　to…nightnever；　never　again！here　it　all　is。

I'll　say　it；　I　don't　care　what　you　think；　it　doesn't　matter；　I　only

want　to　help　you。　　Besides；　you're　kindyou're　kind。　　I've　been

thinking　then　of　leaving　for　ever　so　long。　　But　you've　come　so

oftenat　timesand　you've　had　so　much　to　do；　and　it　has　been　so

pleasant　and　interesting；　that　I've　remained；　I've　kept　putting　off

any　change。　　More　than　once；　when　I　had　nearly　decided；　you've

turned　up　again　and　I've　thought　'Oh　no！'　　That's　the　simple　fact！〃

She　had　by　this　time　got　her　confusion　down　so　completely　that　she

could　laugh。　　〃This　is　what　I　meant　when　I　said　to　you　just　now

that　I　'knew。'　　I've　known　perfectly　that　you　knew　I　took　trouble

for　you；　and　that　knowledge　has　been　for　me；　and　I　seemed　to　see　it

was　for　you；　as　if　there　were　somethingI　don't　know　what　to　call

it！between　us。　　I　mean　something　unusual　and　good　and　awfully

nicesomething　not　a　bit　horrid　or　vulgar。〃



She　had　by　this　time；　she　could　see；　produced　a　great　effect　on

him；　but　she　would　have　spoken　the　truth　to　herself　had　she　at　the

same　moment　declared　that　she　didn't　in　the　least　care：　　all　the

more　that　the　effect　must　be　one　of　extreme　perplexity。　　What；　in

it　all；　was　visibly　clear　for　him；　none　the　less；　was　that　he　was

tremendously　glad　he　had　met　her。　　She　held　him；　and　he　was

astonished　at　the　force　of　it；　he　was　intent；　immensely

considerate。　　His　elbow　was　on　the　back　of　the　seat；　and　his　head；

with　the　pot…hat　pushed　quite　back；　in　a　boyish　way；　so　that　she

really　saw　almost　for　the　first　time　his　forehead　and　hair；　rested

on　the　hand　into　which　he　had　crumpled　his　gloves。　　〃Yes；〃　he

assented；　〃it's　not　a　bit　horrid　or　vulgar。〃



She　just　hung　fire　a　moment；　then　she　brought　out　the　whole　truth。

〃I'd　do　anything　for　you。　　I'd　do　anything　for　you。〃　　Never　in　her

life　had　she　known　anything　so　high　and　fine　as　this；　just　letting

him　have　it　and　bravely　and　magnificently　leaving　it。　　Didn't　the

place；　the　associations　and　circumstances；　perfectly　make　it　sound

what　it　wasn't？　and　wasn't　that　exactly　the　beauty？



So　she　bravely　and　magnificently　left　it；　and　little　by　little　she

felt　him　take　it　up；　take　it　down；　as　if　they　had　been　on　a　satin

sofa　in　a　boudoir。　　She　had　never　seen　a　boudoir；　but　there　had

been　lots　of　boudoirs　in　the　telegrams。　　What　she　had　said　at　all

events　sank　into　him；　so　that　after　a　minute　he　simply　made　a

movement　that　had　the　result　of　placing　his　hand　on　her　own

presently　indeed　that　of　her　feeling　herself　firmly　enough　grasped。

There　was　no　pressure　she　need　return；　there　was　none　she　need

decline；　she　just　sat　admirably　still；　satisfied　for　the　time　with

the　surprise　and　bewilderment　of　the　impression　she　made　on　him。

His　agitation　was　even　greater　on　the　whole　than　she　had　at　first

allowed　for。　　〃I　say；　you　know；　you　mustn't　think　of　leaving！〃　he

at　last　broke　out。



〃Of　leaving　Cocker's；　you　mean？〃



〃Yes；　you　must　stay　on　there；　whatever　happens；　and　help　a　fellow。〃



She　was　silent　a　little；　partly　because　it　was　so　strange　and

exquisite　to　feel　him　watch　her　as　if　it　really　mattered　to　him　and

he　were　almost　in　suspense。　　〃Then　you　HAVE　quite　recognised　what

I've　tried　to　do？〃　she　asked。



〃Why；　wasn't　that　exactly　what　I　dashed　over　from　my　door　just　now

to　thank　you　for？〃



〃Yes；　so　you　said。〃



〃And　don't　you　believe　it？〃



She　looked　down　a　moment　at　his　hand；　which　continued　to　cover　her

own；　whereupon　he　presently　drew　it　back；　rather　restlessly　folding

his　arms。　　Without　answering　his　question　she　went　on：　　〃Have　you

ever　spoken　of　me？〃



〃Spoken　of　you？〃



〃Of　my　being　thereof　my　knowing；　and　that　sort　of　thing。〃



〃Oh　never　to　a　human　creature！〃　he　eagerly　declared。



She　had　a　small　drop　at　this；　which　was　expressed　in　another　pause；

and　she　then　returned　to　what　he　had　just　asked　her。　　〃Oh　yes；　I

quite　believe　you　like　itmy　always　being　there　and　our　taking

things　up　so　familiarly　and　successfully：　　if　not　exactly　where　we

left　them；〃　she　laughed；　〃almost　always　at　least　at　an　interesting

point！〃　　He　was　about　to　say　something　in　reply　to　this；　but　her

friendly　gaiety　was　quicker。　　〃You　want　a　great　many　things　in

life；　a　great　many　comforts　and　helps　and　luxuriesyou　want

everything　as　pleasant　as　possible。　　Therefore；　so　far　as　it's　in

the　power　of　any　particular　person　to　contribute　to　all　that〃

She　had　turned　her　face　to　him　smiling；　just　thinking。



〃Oh　see　here！〃　　But　he　was　highly　amused。　　〃Well；　what　then？〃　he

enquired　as　if　to　humour　her。



〃Why　the　particular　person　must　never　fail。　　We　must　manage　it　for

you　somehow。〃



He　threw　back　his　head；　laughing　out；　he　was　really　exhilarated。

〃Oh　yes；　somehow！〃



〃Well；　I　think　we　each　dodon't　we？in　one　little　way　and　another

and　according　to　our　limited　lights。　　I'm　pleased　at　any　rate；　for

myself；　that　you　are；　for　I　assure　you　I've　done　my　best。〃



〃You　do　better　than　any　one！〃　　He　had　struck　a　match　for　another

cigarette；　and　the　flame　lighted　an　instant　his　responsive　finished

face；　magnifying　into　a　pleasant　grimace　the　kindness　with　which　he

paid　her　this　tribute。　　〃You're　awfully　clever；　you　know；　cleverer；

cleverer；　cleverer！〃　　He　had　appeared　on　the　point　of　making　some

tremendous　statement；　then　suddenly；　puffing　his　cigarette　and

shifting　almost　with　violence　on　his　seat；　he　let　it　altogether

fall。







CHAPTER　XVII







In　spite　of　this　drop；　if　not　just　by　reason　of　it；　she　felt　as　if

Lady　Bradeen；　all　but　named　out；　had　popped　straight　up；　and　she

practically　betrayed　her　consciousness　by　waiting　a　little　before

she　rejoined：　　〃Cleverer　than　who？〃



〃Well；　if　I　wasn't　afraid　you'd　think　I　swagger；　I　should　saythan

anybody！　　If　you　leave　your　place　there；　where　shall　you　go？〃　he

more　gravely　asked。



〃Oh　too　far　for　you　ever　to　find　me！〃



〃I'd　find　you　anywhere。〃



The　tone　of　this　was　so　still　more　serious　that　she　had　but　her　one

acknowledgement。　　〃I'd　do　anything　for　youI'd　do　anything　for

you；〃　she　repeated。　　She　had　already；　she　felt；　said　it　all；　so

what　did　anything　more；　anything　less；　matter？　　That　was　the　very

reason　indeed　why　she　could；　with　a　lighter　note；　ease　him

generously　of　any　awkwardness　produced　by　solemnity；　either　his　own

or　hers。　　〃Of　course　it　must　be　nice　for　you　to　be　able　to　think

there　are　people　all　about　who　feel　in　such　a　way。〃



In　immediate　appreciation　of　this；　however；　he　only　smoked　without

looking　at　her。　　〃But　you　don't　want　to　give　up　your　present　work？〃

he　at　last　threw　out。　　〃I　mean　you　WILL　stay　in　the　post…office？〃



〃Oh　yes；　I　think　I've　a　genius　for　that。〃



〃Rather！　　No　one　can　touch　you。〃　　With　this　he　turned　more　to　her

again。　　〃But　you　can　get；　with　a　move；　greater　advantages？〃



〃I　can　get　in　the　suburbs　cheaper　lodgings。　　I　live　with　my　mother。

We　need　some　space。　　There's　a　particular　place　that　has　other

inducements。〃



He　just　hesitated。　　〃Where　is　it？〃



〃Oh　quite　out　of　YOUR　way。　　You'd　never　have　time。〃



〃But　I　tell　you　I'd　go　anywhere。　　Don't　you　believe　it？〃



〃Yes；　for　once　or　twice。　　But　you'd　soon　see　it　wouldn't　do　for

you。〃



He　smoked　and　considered；　seemed　to　stretch　himself　a　little　and；

with　his　legs　out；　surrender　himself　comfortably。　　〃Well；　well；

wellI　believe　everything　you　say。　　I　take　it　from　youanything

you　likein　the　most　extraordinary　way。〃　　It　struck　her　certainly…

…and　almost　without　bitternessthat　the　way　in　which　she　was

already；　as　if　she　had　been　an　old　friend；　arranging　for　him　and

preparing　the　only　magnificence　she　could　muster；　was　quite　the

most　extraordinary。　　〃Don't；　DON'T　go！〃　he　presently　went　on。　　〃I

shall　miss　you　too　horribly！〃



〃So　that　you　just　put　it　to　me　as　a　definite　request？〃oh　how　she

tried　to　divest　this　of　all　sound　of　the　hardness　of　bargaining！

That　ought　to　have　been　easy　enough；　for　what　was　she　arranging　to

get？　　Before　he　could　answer　she　had　continued：　　〃To　be　perfectly

fair　I　should　tell　you　I　recognise　at　Cocker's　certain　strong

attractions。　　All　you　people　come。　　I　like　all　the　horrors。〃



〃The　horrors？〃



〃Those　you　allyou　know　the　set　I　mean；　YOUR　setshow　me　with　as

good　a　conscience　as　if　I　had　no　more　feeling　than　a　letter…box。〃



He　looked　quite　excited　at　the　way　she　put　it。　　〃Oh　they　don't

know！〃



〃Don't　know　I'm　not　stupid？　　No；　how　should　they？〃



〃Yes；　how　should　they？〃　said　the　Captain　sympathetically。　　〃But

isn't　'horrors'　rather　strong？〃



〃What　you　DO　is　rather　strong！〃　the　girl　promptly　returned。



〃What　I　do？〃



〃Your　extravagance；　your　selfishness；　your　immorality；　your

crimes；〃　she　pursued；　without　heeding　his　expression。



〃I　SAY！〃her　companion　showed　the　queerest　stare。