heidi-第24节

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e　every　one　at　the　same　time；　because　He　is　a　God　and　not　a　human　being　like　you　and　me。　And　because　He　thought　it　was　better　for　you　not　to　have　at　once　what　you　wanted；　He　said　to　Himself：　Yes；　Heidi　shall　have　what　she　asks　for；　but　not　until　the　right　time　comes；　so　that　she　may　be　quite　happy。　If　I　do　what　she　wants　now；　and　then　one　day　she　sees　that　it　would　have　been　better　for　her　not　to　have　had　her　own　way；　she　will　cry　and　say；　'If　only　God　had　not　given　me　what　I　asked　for！　it　is　not　so　good　as　I　expected！'　And　while　God　is　watching　over　you；　and　looking　to　see　if　you　will　trust　Him　and　go　on　praying　to　Him　every　day；　and　turn　to　Him　for　everything　you　want；　you　run　away　and　leave　off　saying　your　prayers；　and　forget　all　about　Him。　And　when　God　no　longer　hears　the　voice　of　one　He　knew　among　those　who　pray　to　Him；　He　lets　that　person　go　his　own　way；　that　he　may　learn　how　foolish　he　is。　And　then　this　one　gets　into　trouble；　and　cries；　'Save　me；　God；　for　there　is　none　other　to　help　me；'　and　God　says；　'Why　did　you　go　from　Me；　I　could　not　help　you　when　you　ran　away。'　And　you　would　not　like　to　grieve　God；　would　you　Heidi；　when　He　only　wants　to　be　kind　to　you？　So　will　you　not　go　and　ask　Him　to　forgive　you；　and　continue　to　pray　and　to　trust　Him；　for　you　may　be　sure　that　He　will　make　everything　right　and　happy　for　you；　and　then　you　will　be　glad　and　lighthearted　again。〃

Heidi　had　perfect　confidence　in　the　grandmother；　and　every　word　she　said　sunk　into　her　heart。

〃I　will　go　at　once　and　ask　God　to　forgive　me；　and　I　will　never　forget　Him　again；〃　she　replied　repentantly。

〃That　is　right；　dear　child；〃　and　anxious　to　cheer　her；　added；　〃Don't　be　unhappy；　for　He　will　do　everything　you　wish　in　good　time。〃

And　Heidi　ran　away　and　prayed　that　she　might　always　remember　God；　and　that　He　would　go　on　thinking　about　her。

The　day　came　for　grandmother's　departurea　sad　one　for　Clara　and　Heidi。　But　the　grandmother　was　determined　to　make　it　as　much　like　a　holiday　as　possible　and　not　to　let　them　mope；　and　she　kept　them　so　lively　and　amused　that　they　had　no　time　to　think　about　their　sorrow　at　her　going　until　she　really　drove　away。　Then　the　house　seemed　so　silent　and　empty　that　Heidi　and　Clara　did　not　know　what　to　do　with　themselves；　and　sat　during　the　remainder　of　the　day　like　two　lost　children。

The　next　day；　when　the　hour　came　for　Clara　and　Heidi　to　be　together；　the　latter　walked　in　with　her　book　and　proposed　that　she　should　go　on　reading　aloud　every　afternoon　to　Clara；　if　the　latter　liked　it。　Clara　agreed；　and　thought　anyhow　it　would　be　nice　for　that　day；　so　Heidi　began　with　her　usual　enthusiasm。　But　the　reading　did　not　last　long；　for　Heidi　had　hardly　begun　a　tale　about　a　dying　grandmother　before　she　cried　out；　〃O！　then　grandmother　is　dead！〃　and　burst　into　tears；　for　everything　she　read　was　so　real　to　her　that　she　quite　thought　it　was　the　grandmother　at　home　who　had　died；　and　she　kept　on　exclaiming　as　her　sobs　increased；　〃She　is　dead；　and　I　shall　never　see　her　again；　and　she　never　had　one　of　the　white　rolls！〃

Clara　did　all　she　could　to　explain　to　Heidi　that　the　story　was　about　quite　a　different　grandmother；　but　even　when　at　last　she　had　been　able　to　convince　Heidi　of　this；　the　latter　continued　to　weep　inconsolably；　for　now　she　had　awakened　to　the　thought　that　perhaps　the　grandmother；　and　even　the　grandfather　also；　might　die　while　she　was　so　far　way；　and　that　if　she　did　not　go　home　for　a　long　time　she　would　find　everything　there　all　silent　and　dead；　and　there　she　would　be　all　alone；　and　would　never　be　able　to　see　the　dear　ones　she　loved　any　more。

Fraulein　Rottenmeier　had　meanwhile　come　into　the　room；　and　Clara　explained　to　her　what　had　happened。　As　Heidi　continued　her　weeping；　the　lady；　who　was　evidently　getting　impatient　with　her；　went　up　to　Heidi　and　said　with　decision；　〃Now；　Adelaide；　that　is　enough　of　all　this　causeless　lamentation。　I　will　tell　you　once　for　all；　if　there　are　any　more　scenes　like　this　while　you　are　reading；　I　shall　take　the　book　away　from　you　and　shall　not　let　you　have　it　again。〃

Her　words　had　immediate　effect　on　Heidi；　who　turned　pale　with　fear。　The　book　was　her　one　great　treasure。　She　quickly　dried　her　tears　and　swallowed　her　sobs　as　best　she　could；　so　that　no　further　sound　of　them　should　be　heard。　The　threat　did　its　work；　for　Heidi　never　cried　aloud　again　whatever　she　might　be　reading；　but　she　had　often　to　struggle　hard　to　keep　back　her　tears；　so　that　Clara　would　look　at　her　and　say；

〃What　faces　you　are　making；　Heidi；　I　never　saw　anything　like　it！〃　But　the　faces　made　no　noise　and　did　not　offend　Fraulein　Rottenmeier；　and　Heidi；　having　overcome　her　fit　of　despairing　misery；　would　go　quietly　on　for　a　while；　and　no　one　perceived　her　sorrow。　But　she　lost　all　her　appetite；　and　looked　so　pale　and　thin　that　Sebastian　was　quite　unhappy　when　he　looked　at　her；　and　could　not　bear　to　see　her　refusing　all　the　nice　dishes　he　handed　her。　He　would　whisper　to　her　sometimes；　in　quite　a　kind；　fatherly　manner；　〃Take　a　little；　you　don't　know　how　nice　it　is！　There；　a　good　spoonful；　now　another。〃　But　it　was　of　no　use；　Heidi　hardly　ate　anything　at　all；　and　as　soon　as　she　laid　her　head　down　at　night　the　picture　of　home　would　rise　before　her　eyes；　and　she　would　weep；　burying　her　face　in　the　pillow　that　her　crying　might　not　be　heard。

And　so　many　weeks　passed　away。　Heidi　did　not　know　it　is　was　winter　or　summer；　for　the　walls　and　windows　she　looked　out　upon　showed　no　change；　and　she　never　went　beyond　the　house　except　on　rare　occasions　when　Clara　was　well　enough　to　drive　out；　and　then　they　only　went　a　very　little　way；　as　Clara　could　not　bear　the　movement　for　long。　So　that　on　these　occasions　they　generally　only　saw　more　fine　streets　and　large　houses　and　crowds　of　people；　they　seldom　got　anywhere　beyond　them；　and　grass　and　flowers；　fir　trees　and　mountains；　were　still　far　away。　Heidi's　longing　for　the　old　familiar　and　beautiful　things　grew　daily　stronger；　so　that　now　only　to　read　a　word　that　recalled　them　to　her　remembrance　brought　her　to　the　verge　of　tears；　which　with　difficulty　she　suppressed。　So　the　autumn　and　winter　passed；　and　again　the　sun　came　shining　down　on　the　white　walls　of　the　opposite　houses；　and　Heidi　would　think　to　herself　that　now　the　time　had　come　for　Peter　to　go　out　again　with　the　goats；　to　where　the　golden　flowers　of　the　cistus　were　glowing　in　the　sunlight；　and　all　the　rocks　around　turned　to　fire　at　sunset。　Heidi　would　go　and　sit　in　a　corner　of　her　lonely　room　and　put　her　hands　up　to　her　eyes　that　she　might　not　see　the　sun　shining　on　the　opposite　wall；　and　then　she　would　remain　without　moving；　battling　silently　with　her　terrible　homesickness　until　Clara　sent　for　her　again。



CHAPTER　XII。　A　GHOST　IN　THE　HOUSE

For　some　days　past　Fraulein　Rottenmeier　had　gone　about　rather　silently　and　as　if　lost　in　thought。　As　twilight　fell；　and　she　passed　from　room　to　room；　or　along　the　long　corridors；　she　was　seen　to　look　cautiously　behind　her；　and　into　the　dark　corners；　as　if　she　thought　some　one　was　coming　silently　behind　her　and　might　unexpectedly　give　her　dress　a　pull。　Nor　would　she　now　go　alone　into　some　parts　of　the　house。　If　she　visited　the　upper　floor　where　the　grand　guest…chambers　were；　or　had　to　go　down　into　the　large　mysterious　council…chamber；　where　every　footstep　echoed；　and　the　old　senators　with　their　big　white　collars　looked　down　so　solemnly　and　immovably　from　their　frames；　she　regularly　called　Tinette　to　accompany　her；　in　case；　as　she　said；　there　might　be　something　to　carry　up　or　down。　Tinette　on　her　side　did　exactly　the　same；　if　she　had　business　upstairs　or　down；　she　called　Sebastian　to　accompany　her；　and　there　was　always　something　he　must　help　her　with　which　she　could　not　carry　alone。　More　curious　still；　Sebastian；　also；　if　sent　into　one　of　the　more　distant　rooms；　always　called　John　to　go　with　him　in　case　he　should　want　his　assistance　in　bringing　what　was　required。　And　John　readily　obeyed；　although　there　was　never　anything　to　carry；　and　either　might　well　have　gone　alone；　but　he　did　not　know　how　soon　he　might　want　to　ask　Sebastian　to　do　the　same　service　for　him。　And　while　these　things　were　going　on　upstairs；　the　cook；　who　had　been　in　the　house　for　years；　would　stand　shaking　her　head　over　her　pots　and　kettles；　and　sighing；　〃That　ever　I　should　live　to　know　such　a　thing。〃

For　something　very　strange　and　mysterious　was　going　on　in　Herr　Sesemann's　house。　Every　morning；　when　the　servants　went　downstairs；　they　found　the　front　door　wide　open；　although　nobody　could　be　seen　far　or　near　to　account　for　it。　During　the　first　few　days　that　this　happened　every　room　and　corner　was　searched　in　great　alarm；　to　see　if　anything　had　been　stolen；　for　the　general　idea　was　that　a　thief　had　been　hiding　in　the　house　and　had　gone　off　in　the　night　with　the　stolen　goods；　but　not　a　thing　in　the　house　had　been　touched；　everything　was　safe　in　its　place。　The　door　was　doubly　locked　at　night；　and　for　further　security　the　wooden　bar　was　fastened　across　it；　but　it　was　no　goodnext　morning　the　door　again　stood　open。　The　servants　in　their　fear　and　excitement　got　up　extra　early；　but　not　so　early　but　what　the　door　had　been　opened　before　they　got　downstairs；　although　everything　and　everybody　around　were　still　wrapped　in　slumber；　and　the　doors　and　windows