wreck of the golden mary(金玛丽的遗骸)-第8节
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without warning； and out of any course that could have been guarded
against； that the same loss would have happened if I had been in charge；
and that John was not to blame； but from first to last had done his duty
nobly； like the man he was。 I tried to write it down in my pocket…book； but
could make no words； though I knew what the words were that I wanted to
make。 When it had come to that； her handsthough she was dead so long
laid me down gently in the bottom of the boat； and she and the Golden
Lucy swung me to sleep。
ALL THAT FOLLOWS； WAS WRITTEN BY JOHN STEADIMAN；
CHIEF MATE；
On the twenty…sixth day after the foundering of the Golden Mary at
sea； I； John Steadiman； was sitting in my place in the stern…sheets of the
Surf…boat； with just sense enough left in me to steerthat is to say； with
my eyes strained； wide…awake； over the bows of the boat； and my brains
fast asleep and dreamingwhen I was roused upon a sudden by our second
mate； Mr。 William Rames。
〃Let me take a spell in your place；〃 says he。 〃And look you out for the
Long…boat astern。 The last time she rose on the crest of a wave； I thought I
made out a signal flying aboard her。〃
We shifted our places； clumsily and slowly enough； for we were both
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of us weak and dazed with wet； cold； and hunger。 I waited some time；
watching the heavy rollers astern； before the Long…boat rose a…top of one
of them at the same time with us。 At last； she was heaved up for a moment
well in view； and there； sure enough； was the signal flying aboard of hera
strip of rag of some sort； rigged to an oar； and hoisted in her bows。
〃What does it mean？〃 says Rames to me in a quavering； trembling sort
of voice。 〃Do they signal a sail in sight？〃
〃Hush； for God's sake！〃 says I； clapping my hand over his mouth。
〃Don't let the people hear you。 They'll all go mad together if we mislead
them about that signal。 Wait a bit； till I have another look at it。〃
I held on by him； for he had set me all of a tremble with his notion of a
sail in sight； and watched for the Long…boat again。 Up she rose on the top
of another roller。 I made out the signal clearly； that second time； and saw
that it was rigged half…mast high。
〃Rames；〃 says I； 〃it's a signal of distress。 Pass the word forward to
keep her before the sea； and no more。 We must get the Long…boat within
hailing distance of us； as soon as possible。〃
I dropped down into my old place at the tiller without another word… …
for the thought went through me like a knife that something had happened
to Captain Ravender。 I should consider myself unworthy to write another
line of this statement； if I had not made up my mind to speak the truth； the
whole truth； and nothing but the truthand I must； therefore； confess
plainly that now； for the first time； my heart sank within me。 This
weakness on my part was produced in some degree； as I take it； by the
exhausting effects of previous anxiety and grief。
Our provisionsif I may give that name to what we had leftwere
reduced to the rind of one lemon and about a couple of handsfull of
coffee…berries。 Besides these great distresses； caused by the death； the
danger； and the suffering among my crew and passengers； I had had a little
distress of my own to shake me still more； in the death of the child whom I
had got to be very fond of on the voyage outso fond that I was secretly a
little jealous of her being taken in the Long…boat instead of mine when the
ship foundered。 It used to be a great comfort to me； and I think to those
with me also； after we had seen the last of the Golden Mary； to see the
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THE WRECK OF THE GOLDEN MARY
Golden Lucy； held up by the men in the Long…boat； when the weather
allowed it； as the best and brightest sight they had to show。 She looked； at
the distance we saw her from； almost like a little white bird in the air。 To
miss her for the first time； when the weather lulled a little again； and we
all looked out for our white bird and looked in vain； was a sore
disappointment。 To see the men's heads bowed down and the captain's
hand pointing into the sea when we hailed the Long…boat； a few days after；
gave me as heavy a shock and as sharp a pang of heartache to bear as ever
I remember suffering in all my life。 I only mention these things to show
that if I did give way a little at first； under the dread that our captain was
lost to us； it was not without having been a good deal shaken beforehand
by more trials of one sort or another than often fall to one man's share。
I had got over the choking in my throat with the help of a drop of
water； and had steadied my mind again so as to be prepared against the
worst； when I heard the hail （Lord help the poor fellows； how weak it
sounded！） …
〃Surf…boat； ahoy！〃
I looked up； and there were our companions in misfortune tossing
abreast of us； not so near that we could make out the features of any of
them； but near enough； with some exertion for people in our condition； to
make their voices heard in the intervals when the wind was weakest。
I answered the hail； and waited a bit； and heard nothing； and then sung
out the captain's name。 The voice that replied did not sound like his； the
words that reached us were：
〃Chief…mate wanted on board！〃
Every man of my crew knew what that meant as well as I did。 As
second officer in command； there could be but one reason for wanting me
on board the Long…boat。 A groan went all round us； and my men looked
darkly in each other's faces； and whispered under their breaths：
〃The captain is dead！〃
I commanded them to be silent； and not to make too sure of bad news；
at such a pass as things had now come to with us。 Then； hailing the Long…
boat； I signified that I was ready to go on board when the weather would
let mestopped a bit to draw a good long breathand then called out as
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loud as I could the dreadful question：
〃Is the captain dead？〃
The black figures of three or four men in the after…part of the Long…
boat all stooped down together as my voice reached them。 They were lost
to view for about a minute； then appeared againone man among them
was held up on his feet by the rest； and he hailed back the blessed words （a
very faint hope went a very long way with people in our desperate
situation）： 〃Not yet！〃
The relief felt by me； and by all with me； when we knew that our
captain； though unfitted for duty； was not lost to us； it is not in wordsat
least； not in such words as a man like me can commandto express。 I did
my best to cheer the men by telling them what a good sign it was that we
were not as badly off yet as we had feared； and then communicated what
instructions I had to give； to William Rames； who was to be left in
command in my place when I took charge of the Long…boat。 After that；
there was nothing to be done； but to wait for the chance of the wind
dropping at sunset； and the sea going down afterwards； so as to enable our
weak crews to lay the two boats alongside of each other； without undue
riskor； to put it plainer； without saddling ourselves with the necessity for
any extraordinary exertion of strength or skill。 Both the one and the other
had now been starved out of us for days and days together。
At sunset the wind suddenly dropped； but the sea； which had been
running high for so long a time past； took hours after that before it showed
any signs of getting to rest。 The moon was shining； the sky was
wonderfully clear； and it could not have been； according to my
calculations； far off midnight； when the long； slow； regular swell of the
calming ocean fairly set in； and I took the responsibility of lessening the
distance between the Long…boat and ourselves。
It was； I dare say； a delusion of mine；
