herland(她乡)-第42节
按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
till it is safewill we？〃
This was a hard saying for a very loving husband。
〃Unless；〃 she went on； 〃if one is coming； you will leave me
behind。 You can come back； you knowand I shall have the child。〃
Then that deep ancient chill of male jealousy of even his own
progeny touched my heart。
〃I'd rather have you； Ellador； than all the children in the world。
I'd rather have you with meon your own termsthan not to have you。〃
This was a very stupid saying。 Of course I would！ For if she
wasn't there I should want all of her and have none of her。 But if she
went along as a sort of sublimated sisteronly much closer and warmer
than that； reallywhy I should have all of her but that one thing。 And I
was beginning to find that Ellador's friendship； Ellador's comradeship；
Ellador's sisterly affection； Ellador's perfectly sincere lovenone the less
deep that she held it back on a definite line of reservewere enough to live
on very happily。
I find it quite beyond me to describe what this woman was to me。
We talk fine things about women； but in our hearts we know that they are
very limited beingsmost of them。 We honor them for their functional
powers； even while we dishonor them by our use of it； we honor them for
their carefully enforced virtue； even while we show by our own conduct
how little we think of that virtue； we value them； sincerely； for the
perverted maternal activities which make our wives the most comfortable
of servants； bound to us for life with the wages wholly at our own decision；
their whole business； outside of the temporary duties of such motherhood
as they may achieve； to meet our needs in every way。 Oh； we value them；
all right； 〃in their place；〃 which place is the home； where they perform that
mixture of duties so ably described by Mrs。 Josephine Dodge Daskam
Bacon； in which the services of 〃a mistress〃 are carefully specified。 She is
a very clear writer； Mrs。 J。 D。 D。 Bacon； and understands her subjectfrom
148
… Page 149…
HERLAND
her own point of view。 Butthat combination of industries； while
convenient； and in a way economical； does not arouse the kind of emotion
commanded by the women of Herland。 These were women one had to love
〃up；〃 very high up； instead of down。 They were not pets。 They were not
servants。 They were not timid； inexperienced； weak。
After I got over the jar to my pride （which Jeff； I truly think；
never felthe was a born worshipper； and which Terry never got overhe
was quite clear in his ideas of 〃the position of women〃）； I found that
loving 〃up〃 was a very good sensation after all。 It gave me a queer feeling；
way down deep； as of the stirring of some ancient dim prehistoric
consciousness； a feeling that they were right somehowthat this was the
way to feel。 It was likecoming home to mother。 I don't mean the
underflannels… and…doughnuts mother； the fussy person that waits on you
and spoils you and doesn't really know you。 I mean the feeling that a
very little child would have； who had been lostfor ever so long。 It was
a sense of getting home； of being clean and rested； of safety and yet
freedom； of love that was always there； warm like sunshine in May； not
hot like a stove or a featherbeda love that didn't irritate and didn't
smother。
I looked at Ellador as if I hadn't seen her before。 〃If you won't
go；〃 I said； 〃I'll get Terry to the coast and come back alone。 You can let me
down a rope。 And if you will gowhy you blessed wonder…womanI
would rather live with you all my lifelike thisthan to have any other
woman I ever saw； or any number of them； to do as I like with。 Will you
come？〃
She was keen for coming。 So the plans went on。 She'd have
liked to wait for that Marvel of Celis's； but Terry had no such desire。 He
was crazy to be out of it all。 It made him sick； he said； SICK； this
everlasting mother…mother…mothering。 I don't think Terry had what the
phrenologists call 〃the lump of philoprogenitiveness〃 at all well
developed。
〃Morbid one…sided cripples；〃 he called them； even when from
his window he could see their splendid vigor and beauty； even while
Moadine； as patient and friendly as if she had never helped Alima to hold
149
… Page 150…
HERLAND
and bind him； sat there in the room； the picture of wisdom and serene
strength。 〃Sexless； epicene； undeveloped neuters！〃 he went on bitterly。
He sounded like Sir Almwroth Wright。
Wellit was hard。 He was madly in love with Alima； really；
more so than he had ever been before； and their tempestuous courtship；
quarrels； and reconciliations had fanned the flame。 And then when he
sought by that supreme conquest whichseems so natural a thing to that
type of man； to force her to love him as her masterto have the sturdy
athletic furious woman rise up and master himshe and her friendsit was
no wonder he raged。
Come to think of it； I do not recall a similar case in all history or
fiction。 Women have killed themselves rather than submit to outrage；
they have killed the outrager； they have escaped； or they have submitted
sometimes seeming to get on very well with the victor afterward。 There
was that adventure of 〃false Sextus；〃 for instance； who 〃found Lucrese
combing the fleece； under the midnight lamp。〃 He threatened； as I
remember； that if she did not submit he would slay her； slay a slave and
place him beside her and say he found him there。 A poor device； it
always seemed to me。 If Mr。 Lucretius had asked him how he came to be
in his wife's bedroom overlooking her morals； what could he have said？
But the point is Lucrese submitted； and Alima didn't。
〃She kicked me；〃 confided the embittered prisonerhe had to
talk to someone。 〃I was doubled up with the pain； of course； and she
jumped on me and yelled for this old harpy ＇Moadine couldn't hear him＇
and they had me trussed up in no time。 I believe Alima could have done it
alone；〃 he added with reluctant admiration。 〃She's as strong as a horse。
And of course a man's helpless when you hit him like that。 No woman
with a shade of decency〃
I had to grin at that； and even Terry did； sourly。 He wasn't
given to reasoning； but it did strike him that an assault like his rather
waived considerations of decency。
〃I'd give a year of my life to have her alone again；〃 he said
slowly； his hands clenched till the knuckles were white。
But he never did。 She left our end of the country entirely； went
150
… Page 151…
HERLAND
up into the fir…forest on the highest slopes； and stayed there。 Before we left
he quite desperately longed to see her； but she would not come and he
could not go。 They watched him like lynxes。 （Do lynxes watch any
better than mousing cats； I wonder！）
Wellwe had to get the flyer in order； and be sure there was
enough fuel left； though Terry said we could glide all right； down to that
lake； once we got started。 We'd have gone gladly in a week's time； of
course； but there was a great to…do all over the country about Ellador's
leaving them。 She had interviews with some of the leading ethicists
wise women with still eyes； and with the best of the teachers。 There was
a stir； a thrill； a deep excitement every
