bickerstaff-partridge papers(比克一帕特拉奇文件)-第6节
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when you should have been in your coffin this three hours？ In short； what
with undertakers； imbalmers； joiners； sextons； and your damn'd elegy
hawkers； upon a late practitioner in physick and astrology； I got not one
wink of sleep that night； nor scarce a moment's rest ever since。 Now I
doubt not but this villainous 'squire has the impudence to assert； that these
are entirely strangers to him； he； good man； knows nothing of the matter；
and honest Isaac Bickerstaff； I warrant you； is more a man of honour； than
to be an accomplice with a pack of rascals； that walk the streets on nights；
and disturb good people in their beds； but he is out； if he thinks the whole
world is blind； for there is one John Partridge can smell a knave as far as
Grubstreet； tho' he lies in the most exalted garret； and writes himself
'Squire： But I'll keep my temper； and proceed in the narration。
I could not stir out of doors for the space of three months after this； but
presently one comes up to me in the street； Mr Partridge； that coffin you
was last buried in I have not been yet paid for： Doctor； cries another dog；
How d'ye think people can live by making of graves for nothing？ Next
time you die； you may e'en toll out the bell yourself for Ned。 A third rogue
tips me by the elbow； and wonders how I have the conscience to sneak
abroad without paying my funeral expences。 Lord； says one； I durst have
swore that was honest Dr。 Partridge； my old friend； but poor man； he is
gone。 I beg your pardon； says another； you look so like my old
acquaintance that I used to consult on some private occasions； but； alack；
he's gone the way of all flesh Look； look； look； cries a third； after a
competent space of staring at me； would not one think our neighbour the
almanack…maker； was crept out of his grave to take t'other peep at the stars
in this world； and shew how much he is improv'd in fortune…telling by
having taken a journey to the other？
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Nay； the very reader； of our parish； a good sober； discreet person； has
sent two or three times for me to come and be buried decently； or send him
sufficient reasons to the contrary； if I have been interr'd in any other parish；
to produce my certificate； as the act requires。 My poor wife is almost run
distracted with being called Widow Partridge； when she knows its false；
and once a term she is cited into the court； to take out letters of
administration。 But the greatest grievance is； a paultry quack； that takes up
my calling just under my nose； and in his printed directions with N。B。 says；
He lives in the house of the late ingenious Mr。 John Partridge； an eminent
practitioner in leather； physick and astrology。
But to show how far the wicked spirit of envy； malice and resentment
can hurry some men； my nameless old persecutor had provided me a
monument at the stone…cutter's and would have erected it in the parish…
church； and this piece of notorious and expensive villany had actually
succeeded； had I not used my utmost interest with the vestry； where it was
carried at last but by two voices； that I am still alive。 That stratagem
failing； out comes a long sable elegy； bedeck'd with hour…glasses； mattocks；
sculls； spades； and skeletons； with an epitaph as confidently written to
abuse me； and my profession； as if I had been under ground these twenty
years。
And； after such barbarous treatment as this； can the world blame me；
when I ask； What is become of the freedom of an Englishman？ And where
is the liberty and property that my old glorious friend came over to assert？
We have drove popery out of the nation； and sent slavery to foreign climes。
The arts only remain in bondage； when a man of science and character
shall be openly insulted in the midst of the many useful services he is daily
paying to the publick。 Was it ever heard； even in Turkey or Algiers； that a
state…astrologer was banter'd out of his life by an ignorant impostor； or
bawl'd out of the world by a pack of villanous； deep…mouth'd hawkers？
Though I print almanacks； and publish advertisements； though I produce
certificates under the ministers and church…wardens hands I am alive； and
attest the same on oath at quarter…sessions； out comes a full and true
relation of the death and interment of John Partridge； Truth is bore down；
attestations neglected； the testimony of sober persons despised； and a man
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is looked upon by his neighbours as if he had been seven years dead； and
is buried alive in the midst of his friends and acquaintance。
Now can any man of common sense think it consistent with the honour
of my profession； and not much beneath the dignity of a philosopher； to
stand bawling before his own door？ Alive！ Alive ho！ The famous Dr。
Partridge！ No counterfeit； but all alive！ As if I had the twelve celestial
monsters of the zodiac to shew within； or was forced for a livelihood to
turn retailer to May and Bartholomew Fairs。 Therefore； if Her Majesty
would but graciously be pleased to think a hardship of this nature worthy
her royal consideration； and the next parliament； in their great wisdom cast
but an eye towards the deplorable case of their old philomath； that
annually bestows his poetical good wishes on them； I am sure there is one
Isaac Bickerstaff； Esq； would soon be truss'd up for his bloody predictions；
and putting good subjects in terror of their lives： And that henceforward to
murder a man by way of prophecy； and bury him in a printed letter； either
to a lord or commoner； shall as legally entitle him to the present
possession of Tyburn； as if he robb'd on the highway； or cut your throat in
bed。
I shall demonstrate to the judicious； that France and Rome are at the
bottom of this horrid conspiracy against me； and that culprit aforesaid is a
popish emissary； has paid his visits to St。 Germains； and is now in the
measures of Lewis XIV。 That in attempting my reputation； there is a
general massacre of learning designed in these realms； and through my
sides there is a wound given to all the Protestant almanack…makers in the
universe。
Vivat Regina。 ___________________________________________
A vindication of Isaac Bickerstaff； Esq； against what is objected to him
by Mr。 Partridge in his almanack for the present year 1709。
By the said Isaac Bickerstaff； Esq；
Written in the year 1709。
Mr。 Partridge hath been lately pleased to treat me after a very rough
manner； in that which is called； his almanack for the present year： Such
usage is very undecent from one gentleman to another； and does not at all
contribute to the discovery of truth； which ought to be the great end in all
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disputes of the learned。 To call a man fool and villain； and impudent
fellow； only for differing from him in a point meer speculative； is； in my
humble opinion； a very improper style for a person of his education。 I
appeal to the learned world； whether in my last year's predictions I gave
him the least provocation for such unworthy treatment。 Philosophers have
differed in all ages； but the discreetest among them have always differed
as became philosophers。 Scurrility and passion； in a controversy among
scholars； is just so much of nothing to the purpose； and at best； a tacit
confession of a weak cause： My concern is not so much for my own
reputation； as that of the Republick of Letters； which Mr。 Partridge hath
endeavoured to wound through my sides。 If men of publick spirit must be
superciliously treated for their ingenious attempts； how will true useful
knowledge be ever advanced？ I wish Mr。 Partridge knew the thoughts
which foreign universities have conceived of his ungenerous proceedings
with me； but I am too tender of his reputation to publish them to the world。
That spi
