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houted¡¡into¡¡the¡¡mouthpiece£º¡¡¡¨Hi¡¡diddle¡¡diddlefollow¡¡up¡¡that¡£¡¨¡¡Then¡¡he¡¡listened¡¡for¡¡an¡¡answer¡£¡¡The¡¡look¡¡on¡¡his¡¡face¡¡changed¡¡to¡¡one¡¡of¡¡the¡¡utmost¡¡amazement¡£¡¡¡¨It¡¡says¡®The¡¡cat¡¡and¡¡the¡¡fiddle£»'¡¨¡¡he¡¡gasped£»¡¡and¡¡forthwith¡¡he¡¡became¡¡a¡¡convert¡¡to¡¡telephony¡£¡¡By¡¡such¡¡tests¡¡the¡¡men¡¡of¡¡science¡¡were¡¡won¡¡over£»¡¡and¡¡by¡¡the¡¡middle¡¡of¡¡1877¡¡Bell¡¡received¡¡a¡¡¡¨vociferous¡¡welcome¡¨¡¡when¡¡he¡¡addressed¡¡them¡¡at¡¡their¡¡annual¡¡convention¡¡at¡¡Plymouth¡£

Soon¡¡afterwards£»¡¡The¡¡London¡¡Times¡¡surrendered¡£¡¡It¡¡whirled¡¡right¡­about¡­face¡¡and¡¡praised¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡to¡¡the¡¡skies¡£¡¡¡¨Suddenly¡¡and¡¡quietly¡¡the¡¡whole¡¡human¡¡race¡¡is¡¡brought¡¡within¡¡speaking¡¡and¡¡hearing¡¡distance£»¡¨¡¡it¡¡exclaimed£»¡¡¡¨scarcely¡¡anything¡¡was¡¡more¡¡desired¡¡and¡¡more¡¡impossible¡£¡¨¡¡The¡¡next¡¡paper¡¡to¡¡quit¡¡the¡¡mob¡¡of¡¡scoffers¡¡was¡¡the¡¡Tatler£»¡¡which¡¡said¡¡in¡¡an¡¡editorial¡¡peroration£»¡¡¡¨We¡¡cannot¡¡but¡¡feel¡¡im¡­¡¡pressed¡¡by¡¡the¡¡picture¡¡of¡¡a¡¡human¡¡child¡¡commanding¡¡the¡¡subtlest¡¡and¡¡strongest¡¡force¡¡in¡¡Nature¡¡to¡¡carry£»¡¡like¡¡a¡¡slave£»¡¡some¡¡whisper¡¡around¡¡the¡¡world¡£¡¨

Closely¡¡after¡¡the¡¡scientists¡¡and¡¡editors¡¡came¡¡the¡¡nobility¡£¡¡The¡¡Earl¡¡of¡¡Caithness¡¡led¡¡the¡¡way¡£¡¡He¡¡declared¡¡in¡¡public¡¡that¡¡¡¨the¡¡telephone¡¡is¡¡the¡¡most¡¡extraordinary¡¡thing¡¡I¡¡ever¡¡saw¡¡in¡¡my¡¡life¡£¡¨¡¡And¡¡one¡¡wintry¡¡morning¡¡in¡¡1878¡¡Queen¡¡Victoria¡¡drove¡¡to¡¡the¡¡house¡¡of¡¡Sir¡¡Thomas¡¡Biddulph£»¡¡in¡¡London£»¡¡and¡¡for¡¡an¡¡hour¡¡talked¡¡and¡¡listened¡¡by¡¡telephone¡¡to¡¡Kate¡¡Field£»¡¡who¡¡sat¡¡in¡¡a¡¡Downing¡¡Street¡¡office¡£¡¡Miss¡¡Field¡¡sang¡¡¡¨Kathleen¡¡Mavourneen£»¡¨¡¡and¡¡the¡¡Queen¡¡thanked¡¡her¡¡by¡¡telephone£»¡¡saying¡¡she¡¡was¡¡¡¨immensely¡¡pleased¡£¡¨¡¡She¡¡congratulated¡¡Bell¡¡himself£»¡¡who¡¡was¡¡present£»¡¡and¡¡asked¡¡if¡¡she¡¡might¡¡be¡¡permitted¡¡to¡¡buy¡¡the¡¡two¡¡telephones£»¡¡whereupon¡¡Bell¡¡presented¡¡her¡¡with¡¡a¡¡pair¡¡done¡¡in¡¡ivory¡£

This¡¡incident£»¡¡as¡¡may¡¡be¡¡imagined£»¡¡did¡¡much¡¡to¡¡establish¡¡the¡¡reputation¡¡of¡¡telephony¡¡in¡¡Great¡¡Britain¡£¡¡A¡¡wire¡¡was¡¡at¡¡once¡¡strung¡¡to¡¡Windsor¡¡Castle¡£¡¡Others¡¡were¡¡ordered¡¡by¡¡the¡¡Daily¡¡News£»¡¡the¡¡Persian¡¡Ambassador£»¡¡and¡¡five¡¡or¡¡six¡¡lords¡¡and¡¡baronets¡£¡¡Then¡¡came¡¡an¡¡order¡¡which¡¡raised¡¡the¡¡hopes¡¡of¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡men¡¡to¡¡the¡¡highest¡¡heaven£»¡¡from¡¡the¡¡banking¡¡house¡¡of¡¡J¡£¡¡S¡£¡¡Morgan¡¡&¡¡Co¡£¡¡It¡¡was¡¡the¡¡first¡¡recognition¡¡from¡¡the¡¡¡¨seats¡¡of¡¡the¡¡mighty¡¨¡¡in¡¡the¡¡business¡¡and¡¡financial¡¡world¡£¡¡A¡¡tiny¡¡exchange£»¡¡with¡¡ten¡¡wires£»¡¡was¡¡promptly¡¡started¡¡in¡¡London£»¡¡and¡¡on¡¡April¡¡2d£»¡¡1879£»¡¡Theodore¡¡Vail£»¡¡the¡¡young¡¡manager¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Bell¡¡Company£»¡¡sent¡¡an¡¡order¡¡to¡¡the¡¡factory¡¡in¡¡Boston£»¡¡¡¨Please¡¡make¡¡one¡¡hundred¡¡hand¡¡telephones¡¡for¡¡export¡¡trade¡¡as¡¡early¡¡as¡¡possible¡£¡¨¡¡The¡¡foreign¡¡trade¡¡had¡¡begun¡£

Then¡¡there¡¡came¡¡a¡¡thunderbolt¡¡out¡¡of¡¡a¡¡blue¡¡sky£»¡¡a¡¡wholly¡¡unforeseen¡¡disaster¡£¡¡Just¡¡as¡¡a¡¡few¡¡energetic¡¡companies¡¡were¡¡sprouting¡¡up£»¡¡the¡¡Postmaster¡¡General¡¡suddenly¡¡proclaimed¡¡that¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡was¡¡a¡¡species¡¡of¡¡telegraph¡£¡¡According¡¡to¡¡a¡¡British¡¡law¡¡the¡¡telegraph¡¡was¡¡required¡¡to¡¡be¡¡a¡¡Government¡¡monopoly¡£¡¡This¡¡law¡¡had¡¡been¡¡passed¡¡six¡¡years¡¡before¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡was¡¡born£»¡¡but¡¡no¡¡matter¡£¡¡The¡¡telephone¡¡men¡¡protested¡¡and¡¡argued¡£¡¡Tyndall¡¡and¡¡Lord¡¡Kelvin¡¡warned¡¡the¡¡Government¡¡that¡¡it¡¡was¡¡making¡¡an¡¡indefensible¡¡mistake¡£¡¡But¡¡nothing¡¡could¡¡be¡¡done¡£¡¡Just¡¡as¡¡the¡¡first¡¡railways¡¡had¡¡been¡¡called¡¡toll¡­roads£»¡¡so¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡was¡¡solemnly¡¡declared¡¡to¡¡be¡¡a¡¡telegraph¡£¡¡Also£»¡¡to¡¡add¡¡to¡¡the¡¡absurd¡¡humor¡¡of¡¡the¡¡situation£»¡¡Judge¡¡Stephen£»¡¡of¡¡the¡¡High¡¡Court¡¡of¡¡Justice£»¡¡spoke¡¡the¡¡final¡¡word¡¡that¡¡compelled¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡legally¡¡to¡¡be¡¡a¡¡telegraph£»¡¡and¡¡sustained¡¡his¡¡opinion¡¡by¡¡a¡¡quotation¡¡from¡¡Webster's¡¡Dictionary£»¡¡which¡¡was¡¡published¡¡twenty¡¡years¡¡before¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡was¡¡invented¡£

Having¡¡captured¡¡this¡¡new¡¡rival£»¡¡what¡¡next£¿¡¡The¡¡Postmaster¡¡General¡¡did¡¡not¡¡know¡£¡¡He¡¡had£»¡¡of¡¡course£»¡¡no¡¡experience¡¡in¡¡telephony£»¡¡and¡¡neither¡¡had¡¡any¡¡of¡¡his¡¡officials¡¡in¡¡the¡¡telegraph¡¡department¡£¡¡There¡¡was¡¡no¡¡book¡¡and¡¡no¡¡college¡¡to¡¡instruct¡¡him¡£¡¡His¡¡telegraph¡¡was¡¡then£»¡¡as¡¡it¡¡is¡¡to¡­day£»¡¡a¡¡business¡¡failure¡£¡¡It¡¡was¡¡not¡¡earning¡¡its¡¡keep¡£¡¡Therefore¡¡he¡¡did¡¡not¡¡dare¡¡to¡¡shoulder¡¡the¡¡risk¡¡of¡¡constructing¡¡a¡¡second¡¡system¡¡of¡¡wires£»¡¡and¡¡at¡¡last¡¡consented¡¡to¡¡give¡¡licenses¡¡to¡¡private¡¡companies¡£

But¡¡the¡¡muddle¡¡continued¡£¡¡In¡¡order¡¡to¡¡compel¡¡competition£»¡¡according¡¡to¡¡the¡¡academic¡¡theories¡¡of¡¡the¡¡day£»¡¡licenses¡¡were¡¡given¡¡to¡¡thir¡­¡¡teen¡¡private¡¡companies¡£¡¡As¡¡might¡¡have¡¡been¡¡expected£»¡¡the¡¡ablest¡¡company¡¡quickly¡¡swallowed¡¡the¡¡other¡¡twelve¡£¡¡If¡¡it¡¡had¡¡been¡¡let¡¡alone£»¡¡this¡¡company¡¡might¡¡have¡¡given¡¡good¡¡service£»¡¡but¡¡it¡¡was¡¡hobbled¡¡and¡¡fenced¡¡in¡¡by¡¡jealous¡¡regulations¡£¡¡It¡¡was¡¡compelled¡¡to¡¡pay¡¡one¡­tenth¡¡of¡¡its¡¡gross¡¡earnings¡¡to¡¡the¡¡Post¡¡Office¡£¡¡It¡¡was¡¡to¡¡hold¡¡itself¡¡ready¡¡to¡¡sell¡¡out¡¡at¡¡six¡¡months'¡¡notice¡£¡¡And¡¡as¡¡soon¡¡as¡¡it¡¡had¡¡strung¡¡a¡¡long¡­distance¡¡system¡¡of¡¡wires£»¡¡the¡¡Postmaster¡¡General¡¡pounced¡¡down¡¡upon¡¡it¡¡and¡¡took¡¡it¡¡away¡£

Then£»¡¡in¡¡1900£»¡¡the¡¡Post¡¡Office¡¡tossed¡¡aside¡¡all¡¡obligations¡¡to¡¡the¡¡licensed¡¡company£»¡¡and¡¡threw¡¡open¡¡the¡¡door¡¡to¡¡a¡¡free¡­for¡­all¡¡competition¡£¡¡It¡¡undertook¡¡to¡¡start¡¡a¡¡second¡¡system¡¡in¡¡London£»¡¡and¡¡in¡¡two¡¡years¡¡discovered¡¡its¡¡blunder¡¡and¡¡proposed¡¡to¡¡cooperate¡£¡¡It¡¡granted¡¡licenses¡¡to¡¡five¡¡cities¡¡that¡¡demanded¡¡municipal¡¡ownership¡£¡¡These¡¡cities¡¡set¡¡out¡¡bravely£»¡¡with¡¡loud¡¡beating¡¡of¡¡drums£»¡¡plunged¡¡from¡¡one¡¡mishap¡¡to¡¡another£»¡¡and¡¡finally¡¡quit¡£¡¡Even¡¡Glasgow£»¡¡the¡¡premier¡¡city¡¡of¡¡municipal¡¡ownership£»¡¡met¡¡its¡¡Waterloo¡¡in¡¡the¡¡telephone¡£¡¡It¡¡spent¡¡one¡¡million£»¡¡eight¡¡hundred¡¡thousand¡¡dollars¡¡on¡¡a¡¡plant¡¡that¡¡was¡¡obsolete¡¡when¡¡it¡¡was¡¡new£»¡¡ran¡¡it¡¡for¡¡a¡¡time¡¡at¡¡a¡¡loss£»¡¡and¡¡then¡¡sold¡¡it¡¡to¡¡the¡¡Post¡¡Office¡¡in¡¡1906¡¡for¡¡one¡¡million£»¡¡five¡¡hundred¡¡and¡¡twenty¡­five¡¡thousand¡¡dollars¡£

So£»¡¡from¡¡first¡¡to¡¡last£»¡¡the¡¡story¡¡of¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡in¡¡Great¡¡Britain¡¡has¡¡been¡¡a¡¡¡¨comedy¡¡of¡¡errors¡£¡¨¡¡There¡¡are¡¡now£»¡¡in¡¡the¡¡two¡¡islands£»¡¡not¡¡six¡¡hundred¡¡thousand¡¡telephones¡¡in¡¡use¡£¡¡London£»¡¡with¡¡its¡¡six¡¡hundred¡¡and¡¡forty¡¡square¡¡miles¡¡of¡¡houses£»¡¡has¡¡one¡­quarter¡¡of¡¡these£»¡¡and¡¡is¡¡gaining¡¡at¡¡the¡¡rate¡¡of¡¡ten¡¡thousand¡¡a¡¡year¡£¡¡No¡¡large¡¡improvements¡¡are¡¡under¡¡way£»¡¡as¡¡the¡¡Post¡¡Office¡¡has¡¡given¡¡notice¡¡that¡¡it¡¡will¡¡take¡¡over¡¡and¡¡operate¡¡all¡¡private¡¡companies¡¡on¡¡New¡¡Year's¡¡Day£»¡¡1912¡£¡¡The¡¡bureaucratic¡¡muddle£»¡¡so¡¡it¡¡seems£»¡¡is¡¡to¡¡continue¡¡indefinitely¡£

In¡¡Germany¡¡there¡¡has¡¡been¡¡the¡¡same¡¡burden¡¡of¡¡bureaucracy£»¡¡but¡¡less¡¡backing¡¡and¡¡filling¡£¡¡There¡¡is¡¡a¡¡complete¡¡government¡¡monopoly¡£¡¡Whoever¡¡commits¡¡the¡¡crime¡¡of¡¡leasing¡¡telephone¡¡service¡¡to¡¡his¡¡neighbors¡¡may¡¡be¡¡sent¡¡to¡¡jail¡¡for¡¡six¡¡months¡£¡¡Here£»¡¡too£»¡¡the¡¡Postmaster¡¡General¡¡has¡¡been¡¡supreme¡£¡¡He¡¡has¡¡forced¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡business¡¡into¡¡a¡¡postal¡¡mould¡£¡¡The¡¡man¡¡in¡¡a¡¡small¡¡city¡¡must¡¡pay¡¡as¡¡high¡¡a¡¡rate¡¡for¡¡a¡¡small¡¡service£»¡¡as¡¡the¡¡man¡¡in¡¡a¡¡large¡¡city¡¡pays¡¡for¡¡a¡¡large¡¡service¡£¡¡There¡¡is¡¡a¡¡fair¡¡degree¡¡of¡¡efficiency£»¡¡but¡¡no¡¡high¡¡speed¡¡or¡¡record¡­breaking¡£¡¡The¡¡German¡¡engineers¡¡have¡¡not¡¡kept¡¡in¡¡close¡¡touch¡¡with¡¡the¡¡progress¡¡of¡¡telephony¡¡in¡¡the¡¡United¡¡States¡£¡¡They¡¡have¡¡preferred¡¡to¡¡devise¡¡methods¡¡of¡¡their¡¡own£»¡¡and¡¡so¡¡have¡¡created¡¡a¡¡miscellaneous¡¡assortment¡¡of¡¡systems£»¡¡good£»¡¡bad£»¡¡and¡¡indifferent¡£¡¡All¡¡told£»¡¡there¡¡is¡¡probably¡¡an¡¡investment¡¡of¡¡seventy¡­five¡¡million¡¡dollars¡¡and¡¡a¡¡total¡¡of¡¡nine¡¡hundred¡¡thousand¡¡telephones¡£

Telephony¡¡has¡¡always¡¡been¡¡in¡¡high¡¡favor¡¡with¡¡the¡¡Kaiser¡£¡¡It¡¡is¡¡his¡¡custom£»¡¡when¡¡planning¡¡a¡¡hunting¡¡party£»¡¡to¡¡have¡¡a¡¡special¡¡wire¡¡strung¡¡to¡¡the¡¡forest¡¡headquarters£»¡¡so¡¡that¡¡he¡¡can¡¡converse¡¡every¡¡morning¡¡with¡¡his¡¡Cabinet¡£¡¡He¡¡has¡¡conferred¡¡degrees¡¡and¡¡honors¡¡by¡¡telephone¡£¡¡Even¡¡his¡¡former¡¡Chancellor£»¡¡Von¡¡Buelow£»¡¡received¡¡his¡¡title¡¡of¡¡Count¡¡in¡¡this¡¡informal¡¡way¡£¡¡But¡¡the¡¡first¡¡friend¡¡of¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡in¡¡Germany¡¡was¡¡Bismarck¡£¡¡The¡¡old¡¡Unifier¡¡saw¡¡instantly¡¡its¡¡value¡¡in¡¡holding¡¡a¡¡nation¡¡together£»¡¡and¡¡ordered¡¡a¡¡line¡¡between¡¡his¡¡palace¡¡in¡¡Berlin¡¡and¡¡his¡¡farm¡¡at¡¡Varzin£»¡¡which¡¡lay¡¡two¡¡hundred¡¡and¡¡thirty¡¡miles¡¡apart¡£¡¡This¡¡was¡¡as¡¡early¡¡as¡¡the¡¡Fall¡¡of¡¡1877£»¡¡and¡¡was¡¡thus¡¡the¡¡first¡¡long¡­distance¡¡line¡¡in¡¡Europe¡£

In¡¡France£»¡¡as¡¡in¡¡England£»¡¡the¡¡Government¡¡seized¡¡upon¡¡the¡¡telephone¡¡business¡¡as¡¡soon¡¡as¡¡the¡¡pioneer¡¡work¡¡had¡¡been¡¡done¡¡by¡¡private¡¡citizens¡£¡¡In¡¡1889¡¡it¡¡practically¡¡confiscated¡¡the¡¡Paris¡¡system£»¡¡and¡¡after¡¡nine¡¡years¡¡of¡¡litigation¡¡paid¡¡five¡¡million¡¡francs¡¡to¡¡its¡¡owners¡£¡¡With¡¡this¡¡reckless¡¡beginning£»¡¡it¡¡floundered¡¡from¡¡bad¡¡to¡¡worse¡£¡¡It¡¡assembled¡¡the¡¡most¡¡complete¡¡assortment¡¡of¡¡other¡¡nations'¡¡mistakes£»¡¡and¡¡invented¡¡several¡¡of¡¡its¡¡own¡£¡¡Almost¡¡every¡¡known¡¡evil¡¡of¡¡bureaucracy¡¡was¡¡developed¡£¡¡The¡¡system¡¡of¡¡rates¡¡was¡¡turned¡¡upside¡¡down£»¡¡the¡¡flat¡¡rate£»¡¡which¡¡can¡¡be¡¡profitably¡¡permitted¡¡in¡¡small¡¡cities¡¡only£»¡¡was¡¡put¡¡in¡¡force¡¡in¡¡the¡¡large¡¡cities£»¡¡and¡¡the¡¡message¡¡rate£»¡¡which¡¡is¡¡applicable¡¡only¡¡to¡¡large¡¡cities£»¡¡was¡¡put¡¡in¡¡force¡¡in¡¡small¡¡places¡£¡¡The¡¡girl¡¡operators¡¡were¡¡entangled¡¡in¡¡a¡¡maze¡¡of¡¡civil¡¡service¡¡rules¡£¡¡They¡¡were¡¡not¡¡allowed¡¡to¡¡marry¡¡without¡¡the¡¡permission¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Postmaster¡¡General£»¡¡and¡¡on¡¡no¡¡account¡¡might¡¡they¡¡dare¡¡to¡¡marry¡¡a¡¡mayor£»¡¡a¡¡policeman£»¡¡a¡¡cashier£»¡¡or¡¡a¡¡foreigner£»¡¡lest¡¡they¡¡betray¡¡the¡¡secrets¡¡of¡¡the¡¡switchboard¡£

There¡¡was¡¡no¡¡national¡¡plan£»¡¡no¡¡standardization£»¡¡no¡¡staff¡¡of¡¡inventors¡¡and¡¡improvers¡£¡¡Every¡¡user¡¡was¡¡required¡¡to¡¡buy¡¡his¡¡own¡¡telephone¡£¡¡As¡¡George¡¡Ade¡¡has¡¡said£»¡¡¡¨Anything¡¡attached¡¡to¡¡a¡¡wall¡¡is¡¡liable¡¡to¡¡be¡¡a¡¡telephone¡¡in¡¡Paris¡£¡¨¡¡And¡¡so£»¡¡what¡¡with¡¡poor¡¡equipment¡¡and¡¡red¡¡tape£»¡¡the¡¡French¡¡system¡¡became¡¡what¡¡it¡¡remains¡¡to¡­day£»¡¡the¡¡most¡¡conspicuous¡¡example¡¡of¡¡what¡¡NOT¡¡to¡¡do¡¡in¡¡telephony¡£

There¡¡are¡¡barely¡¡as¡¡many¡¡telephones¡¡in¡¡the¡¡whole¡¡of¡¡France¡¡as¡¡ought¡¡normally¡¡to¡¡be¡¡in¡¡the¡¡city¡¡of¡¡Paris¡£¡¡There¡¡are¡¡not¡¡as¡¡many¡¡as¡¡are¡¡now¡¡in¡¡use¡¡in¡¡Chicago¡£¡¡The¡¡exasperated¡¡Parisians¡¡have¡¡protested¡£¡¡They¡¡have¡¡presented¡¡a¡¡petition¡¡with¡¡thirty¡­two¡¡thousand¡¡names¡£¡¡They¡¡have¡¡even¡¡organized¡¡a¡¡¡¨Kickers'¡¡League¡¨the¡¡only¡¡body¡¡of¡¡its¡¡kind¡¡in¡¡any¡¡countryto¡¡demand¡¡good¡¡service¡¡at¡¡a¡¡fair¡¡price¡£¡¡The¡¡daily¡¡loss¡¡from¡¡bureaucratic¡¡telephony¡¡has¡¡become¡¡enormous¡£¡¡

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