the island pharisees-第27节
按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
my 〃set〃 were nothing but…〃
Crocker smiled in the darkness； he had been too 〃cranky〃 to belong to
Shelton's 〃set。〃
〃You never were much like your 'set；' old chap；〃 he said。
Shelton turned away； sniffing the perfume of the limes。 Images were
thronging through his mind。 The faces of his old friends strangely
mixed with those of people he had lately metthe girl in the train；
Ferrand； the lady with the short； round； powdered face； the little
barber； others； too； and floating； mysterious；connected with them
all； Antonia's face。 The scent of the lime…trees drifted at him with
its magic sweetness。 From the street behind； the footsteps of the
passers…by sounded muffled； yet exact； and on the breeze was borne
the strain： 〃For he's a jolly good fellow！
For he's a jolly good fellow！ For he's a jolly good fe…ellow！ And
so say all of us！〃
〃Ah！〃 he said； 〃they were good chaps。〃
〃I used to think；〃 said Crocker dreamily； 〃that some of them had too
much side。〃
And Shelton laughed。
〃The thing sickens me；〃 said he； 〃the whole snobbish； selfish
business。 The place sickens me； lined with cotton…wool…made so
beastly comfortable。〃
Crocker shook his head。
〃It's a splendid old place；〃 he said； his eyes fastening at last on
Shelton's boots。 〃You know； old chap；〃 he stammered； 〃I think you
you ought to take care！〃
〃Take care？ What of？〃
Crocker pressed his arm convulsively。
〃Don't be waxy； old boy；〃 he said； 〃I mean that you seem somehowto
beto be losing yourself。〃
〃Losing myself！ Finding myself； you mean！〃
Crocker did not answer； his face was disappointed。 Of what exactly
was he thinking？ In Shelton's heart there was a bitter pleasure in
knowing that his friend was uncomfortable on his account； a sort of
contempt； a sort of aching。 Crocker broke the silence。
〃I think I shall do a bit more walking to…night；〃 he said； 〃I feel
very fit。 Don't you really mean to come any further with me； Bird？〃
And there was anxiety in his voice； as though Shelton were in danger
of missing something good。 The latter's feet had instantly begun to
ache and burn。
〃No！〃？ he said； 〃you know what I'm staying here for。〃
Crocker nodded。
〃She lives near here。 Well； then； I'll say good…bye。 I should like
to do another ten miles to…night。〃
〃My dear fellow； you're tired and lame。〃
Crocker chuckled。
〃No；〃 he said； 〃I want to get on。 See you in London。 Good…bye！〃
and； gripping Shelton's hand； he turned and limped away。
Shelton called after him： 〃Don't be an idiot： You 'll only knock
yourself up。〃
But the sole answer was the pale moon of Crocker's face screwed round
towards him in the darkness； and the waving of his stick。
Shelton strolled slowly on； leaning over the bridge； he watched the
oily gleam of lamps； on the dark water underneath the trees。 He felt
relieved； yet sorry。 His thoughts were random； curious； half
mutinous； half sweet。 That afternoon five years ago； when he had
walked back from the river with Antonia across the Christchurch
meadows； was vivid to his mind； the scent of that afternoon had never
died away from him…the aroma of his love。 Soon she would be his
wifehis wife！ The faces of the dons sprang up before him。 They
had wives； perhaps。 Fat； lean； satirical； and compromisingwhat was
it that through diversity they had in common？ Cultured intolerance！
。 。 。 Honour！ 。 。 。 A queer subject to discuss。 Honour！ The
honour that made a fuss； and claimed its rights！ And Shelton smiled。
〃As if man's honour suffered when he's injured！〃 And slowly he
walked along the echoing； empty street to his room at the Bishop's
Head。 Next morning he received the following wire：
Thirty miles left eighteen hours heel bad but going
strong CROCKER
He passed a fortnight at the Bishop's Head； waiting for the end of
his probation； and the end seemed long in coming。 To be so near
Antonia； and as far as if he lived upon another planet； was worse
than ever。 Each day he took a sculling skiff； and pulled down to
near Holm Oaks； on the chance of her being on the river； but the
house was two miles off； and the chance but slender。 She never came。
After spending the afternoons like this he would return； pulling hard
against the stream； with a queer feeling of relief； dine heartily；
and fall adreaming over his cigar。 Each morning he awoke in an
excited mood； devoured his letter if he had one； and sat down to
write to her。 These letters of his were the most amazing portion of
that fortnight。 They were remarkable for failing to express any
single one of his real thoughts； but they were full of sentiments
which were not what he was truly feeling； and when he set himself to
analyse； he had such moments of delirium that he was scared； and
shocked； and quite unable to write anything。 He made the discovery
that no two human beings ever tell each other what they really feel；
except； perhaps； in situations with which he could not connect
Antonia's ice…blue eyes and brilliant smile。 All the world was too
engaged in planning decency。
Absorbed by longings； he but vaguely realised the turmoil of
Commemoration； which had gathered its hundreds for their annual cure
of salmon mayonnaise and cheap champagne。 In preparation for his
visit to Holm Oaks he shaved his beard and had some clothes sent down
from London。 With them was forwarded a letter from Ferrand； which
ran as follows：
IMPERIAL PEACOCK HOTEL；
FOLKESTONE；
June 20。
MY DEAR SIR；
Forgive me for not having written to you before； but I have been so
bothered that I have felt no taste for writing； when I have the time；
I have some curious stories to tell you。 Once again I have
encountered that demon of misfortune which dogs my footsteps。 Being
occupied all day and nearly all night upon business which brings me a
heap of worries and next to no profit； I have no chance to look after
my things。 Thieves have entered my room； stolen everything； and left
me an empty box。 I am once again almost without clothes； and know
not where to turn to make that figure necessary for the fulfilment of
my duties。 You see； I am not lucky。 Since coming to your country；
the sole piece of fortune I have had was to tumble on a man like you。
Excuse me for not writing more at this moment。 Hoping that you are
in good health； and in affectionately pressing your hand；
I am；
Always your devoted
LOUIS FERRAND。
Upon reading this letter Shelton had once more a sense of being
exploited； of which he was ashamed； he sat down immediately and wrote
the following reply：
BISHOPS HEAD HOTEL；
OXFORD；
June 25。
MY DEAR FERRAND；
I am grieved to hear of your misfortunes。 I was much hoping that you
had made a better start。 I enclose you Post Office Orders for four
pounds。 Always glad to hear from you。
Yours sincerely；
RICHARD SHELTON。
He posted it with the satisfaction that a man feels who nobly shakes
off his responsibilities。
Three days before July he met with one of those disturbing incidents
which befall no persons who attend quietly to their； property and
reputation。
The night was unbearably hot； and he had wandered out with his cigar；
a woman came sidling up and spoke to him。 He perceived her to be one
of those made by men into mediums for their pleasure； to feel
sympathy with whom was sentimental。 Her face was flushed； her
whisper hoarse； she had no attractions but the curves of a tawdry
figure。 Shelton was repelled by her proprietary tone； by her blowzy
face； and by the scent of patchouli。 Her touch on his arm startled
him； sending a shiver through his marrow； he almost leaped aside； and
walked the faster。 But her breathing as she followed sounded
laboured； it suddenly seemed pitiful that a woman should be panting
after him like that。
〃The least I can do；〃 he thought； 〃is to speak to her。〃 He stopped；
and； with a mixture of hardness and compassion； said； 〃It 's
impossible。〃
In spite of her smile； he saw by her disappointed eyes that she
accepted the impossibility。
〃I 'm sorry；〃 he said。
She muttered something。 Shelton shook his head。
〃I 'm sorry；〃 he said once more。 〃Good。…night。〃
The woman bit her lower lip。
〃Good…night；〃 she answered dully。
At the corner of the street he turned his head。 The woman was
hurrying uneasily； a policeman coming from behind had caught her by
the arm。
His heart began to beat。 〃Heavens！〃 he thought； 〃what shall I do
now？〃 His first impulse was to walk away； and think no more about it
to act； indeed； like any averagely decent man who did not care to
be concerned in such affairs。
He retraced his steps； however； and halted half a dozen paces from
their figu
