the little white bird-第16节

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when　it　really　disappeared　into　a　small　tin　cup；　attached　to　my

person　by　a　piece　of　elastic。



To　this　last　charge　I　plead　guilty；　for　in　those　days　I　had　a

pathetic　faith　in　legerdemain；　and　the　eyebrow　feat　（which；

however；　is　entirely　an　affair　of　skill）　having　yielded　such　good

results；　I　naturally　cast　about　for　similar　diversions　when　it

ceased　to　attract。　　It　lost　its　hold　on　David　suddenly；　as　I　was

to　discover　was　the　fate　of　all　of　them；　twenty　times　would　he

call　for　my　latest；　and　exult　in　it；　and　the　twenty…first　time

（and　ever　afterward）　he　would　stare　blankly；　as　if　wondering　what

the　man　meant。　　He　was　like　the　child　queen　who；　when　the　great

joke　was　explained　to　her；　said　coldly；　〃We　are　not　amused；〃　and；

I　assure　you；　it　is　a　humiliating　thing　to　perform　before　an

infant　who　intimates；　after　giving　you　ample　time　to　make　your

points；　that　he　is　not　amused。　　I　hoped　that　when　David　was　able

to　talkand　not　merely　to　stare　at　me　for　five　minutes　and　then

say　〃hat〃his　spoken　verdict；　however　damning；　would　be　less

expressive　than　his　verdict　without　words；　but　I　was

disillusioned。　　I　remember　once　in　those　later　years；　when　he

could　keep　up　such　spirited　conversations　with　himself　that　he

had　little　need　for　any　of　us；　promising　him　to　do　something

exceedingly　funny　with　a　box　and　two　marbles；　and　after　he　had

watched　for　a　long　time　he　said　gravely；　〃Tell　me　when　it　begins

to　be　funny。〃



I　confess　to　having　received　a　few　simple　lessons　in　conjuring；

in　a　dimly　lighted　chamber　beneath　a　shop；　from　a　gifted　young

man　with　a　long　neck　and　a　pimply　face；　who　as　I　entered　took　a

barber's　pole　from　my　pocket；　saying　at　the　same　time；　〃Come；

come；　sir；　this　will　never　do。〃　　Whether　because　he　knew　too

much；　or　because　he　wore　a　trick　shirt；　he　was　the　most

depressing　person　I　ever　encountered；　he　felt　none　of　the

artist's　joy；　and　it　was　sad　to　see　one　so　well　calculated　to

give　pleasure　to　thousands　not　caring　a　dump　about　it。



The　barber's　pole　I　successfully　extracted　from　David's　mouth；

but　the　difficulty　（not　foreseen）　of　knowing　how　to　dispose　of　a

barber's　pole　in　the　Kensington　Gardens　is　considerable；　there

always　being　polite　children　hovering　near　who　run　after　you　and

restore　it　to　you。　　The　young　man；　again；　had　said　that　anyone

would　lend　me　a　bottle　or　a　lemon；　but　though　these　were　articles

on　which　he　seemed　ever　able　to　lay　his　hand；　I　found　（what　I　had

never　noticed　before）　that　there　is　a　curious　dearth　of　them　in

the　Gardens。　　The　magic　egg…cup　I　usually　carried　about　with　me；

and　with　its　connivance　I　did　some　astonishing　things　with

pennies；　but　even　the　penny　that　costs　sixpence　is　uncertain；　and

just　when　you　are　saying　triumphantly　that　it　will　be　found　in

the　egg…cup；　it　may　clatter　to　the　ground；　whereon　some

ungenerous　spectator；　such　as　Irene；　accuses　you　of　fibbing　and

corrupting　youthful　minds。　　It　was　useless　to　tell　her；　through

clenched　teeth；　that　the　whole　thing　was　a　joke；　for　she

understood　no　jokes　except　her　own；　of　which　she　had　the　most

immoderately　high　opinion；　and　that　would　have　mattered　little　to

me　had　not　David　liked　them　also。　　There　were　times　when　I　could

not　but　think　less　of　the　boy；　seeing　him　rock　convulsed　over

antics　of　Irene　that　have　been　known　to　every　nursemaid　since　the

year　One。　　While　I　stood　by；　sneering；　he　would　give　me　the

ecstatic　look　that　meant；　〃Irene　is　really　very　entertaining；

isn't　she？〃



We　were　rivals；　but　I　desire　to　treat　her　with　scrupulous

fairness；　and　I　admit　that　she　had　one　good　thing；　to　wit；　her

gutta…percha　tooth。　　In　earlier　days　one　of　her　front　teeth；　as

she　told　me；　had　fallen　out；　but　instead　of　then　parting　with　it；

the　resourceful　child　had　hammered　it　in　again　with　a　hair…brush；

which　she　offered　to　show　me；　with　the　dents　on　it。　　This　tooth；

having　in　time　passed　away；　its　place　was　supplied　by　one　of

gutta…percha；　made　by　herself；　which　seldom　came　out　except　when

she　sneezed；　and　if　it　merely　fell　at　her　feet　this　was　a　sign

that　the　cold　was　to　be　a　slight　one；　but　if　it　shot　across　the

room　she　knew　she　was　in　for　something　notable。　　Irene's　tooth

was　very　favourably　known　in　the　Gardens；　where　the　perambulators

used　to　gather　round　her　to　hear　whether　it　had　been　doing

anything　to…day；　and　I　would　not　have　grudged　David　his

proprietary　pride　in　it；　had　he　seemed　to　understand　that　Irene's

one　poor　little　accomplishment；　though　undeniably　showy；　was

without　intellectual　merit。　　I　have　sometimes　stalked　away　from

him；　intimating　that　if　his　regard　was　to　be　got　so　cheaply　I

begged　to　retire　from　the　competition；　but　the　Gardens　are　the

pleasantest　club　in　London；　and　I　soon　returned。　　How　I　scoured

the　Gardens　looking　for　him；　and　how　skilful　I　became　at　picking

him　out　far　away　among　the　trees；　though　other　mothers　imitated

the　picturesque　attire　of　him；　to　Mary's　indignation。　　I　also　cut

Irene's　wings　（so　to　speak）　by　taking　her　to　a　dentist。



And　David　did　some　adorable　things。　　For　instance；　he　used　my

pockets　as　receptacles　into　which　he　put　any　article　he　might　not

happen　to　want　at　the　moment。　　He　shoved　it　in；　quite　as　if　they

were　his　own　pockets；　without　saying；　By　your　leave；　and　perhaps

I　discovered　it　on　reaching　homea　tin…soldier；　or　a　pistolwhen

I　put　it　on　my　mantleshelf　and　sighed。　　And　here　is　another

pleasant　memory。　　One　day　I　had　been　over…friendly　to　another

boy；　and；　after　enduring　it　for　some　time　David　up　and　struck

him。　　It　was　exactly　as　Porthos　does；　when　I　favour　other　dogs

（he　knocks　them　down　with　his　foot　and　stands　over　them；　looking

very　noble　and　stern）；　so　I　knew　its　meaning　at　once；　it　was

David's　first　public　intimation　that　he　knew　I　belonged　to　him。



Irene　scolded　him　for　striking　that　boy；　and　made　him　stand　in

disgrace　at　the　corner　of　a　seat　in　the　Broad　Walk。　　The　seat　at

the　corner　of　which　David　stood　suffering　for　love　of　me；　is　the

one　nearest　to　the　Round　Pond　to　persons　coming　from　the　north。



You　may　be　sure　that　she　and　I　had　words　over　this　fiendish

cruelty。　　When　next　we　met　I　treated　her　as　one　who　no　longer

existed；　and　at　first　she　bridled　and　then　was　depressed；　and　as

I　was　going　away　she　burst　into　tears。　　She　cried　because　neither

at　meeting　nor　parting　had　I　lifted　my　hat　to　her；　a　foolish

custom　of　mine；　of　which；　as　I　now　learned　to　my　surprise；　she

was　very　proud。　　She　and　I　still　have　our　tiffs；　but　I　have　never

since　then　forgotten　to　lift　my　hat　to　Irene。　　I　also　made　her

promise　to　bow　to　me；　at　which　she　affected　to　scoff；　saying　I

was　taking　my　fun　of　her；　but　she　was　really　pleased；　and　I　tell

you；　Irene　has　one　of　the　prettiest　and　most　touching　little　bows

imaginable；　it　is　half　to　the　side　（if　I　may　so　express　myself）；

which　has　always　been　my　favourite　bow；　and；　I　doubt　not；　she

acquired　it　by　watching　Mary。



I　should　be　sorry　to　have　it　thought；　as　you　may　now　be　thinking；

that　I　look　on　children　as　on　puppy…dogs；　who　care　only　for　play。

Perhaps　that　was　my　idea　when　first　I　tried　to　lure　David　to　my

unaccustomed　arms；　and　even　for　some　time　after；　for　if　I　am　to

be　candid；　I　must　own　that　until　he　was　three　years　old　I　sought

merely　to　amuse　him。　　God　forgive　me；　but　I　had　only　one　day　a

week　in　which　to　capture　him；　and　I　was　very　raw　at　the　business。



I　was　about　to　say　that　David　opened　my　eyes　to　the　folly　of　it；

but　really　I　think　this　was　Irene's　doing。　　Watching　her　with

children　I　learned　that　partial　as　they　are　to　fun　they　are　moved

almost　more　profoundly　by　moral　excellence。　　So　fond　of　babes　was

this　little　mother　that　she　had　always　room　near　her　for　one

more；　and　often　have　I　seen　her　in　the　Gardens；　the　centre　of　a

dozen　mites　who　gazed　awestruck　at　her　while　she　told　them

severely　how　little　ladies　and　gentlemen　behave。　　They　were

children　of　the　well…to…pass；　and　she　was　from　Drury　Lane；　but

they　believed　in　her　as　the　greatest　of　all　authorities　on　little

ladies　and　gentlemen；　and　the　more　they　heard　of　how　these

romantic　creatures　keep　themselves　tidy　and　avoid　pools　and　wait

till　they　come　to　a　gate；　the　more　they　admired　them；　though

their　faces　showed　how　profoundly　they　felt　that　to　be　little

ladies　and　gentlemen　was　not　for　them。　　You　can't　think　what

hopeless　little　faces　they　were。



Children　are　not　at　all　like　puppies；　I　have　said。　　But　do

puppies　care　only　for　play？　　That　wistful　look；　which　the

merriest　of　them　sometimes　wear；　I　wonder　whether　it　means　that

they　would　like　to　hear　about　the　good　puppies？



As　you　shall　see；　I　invented　many　stories　for　David；　practising

the　telling　of　them　by　my　fireside　as　if　they　were　conjuring

feats；　while　Irene　knew　only　one；　but　she　told　it　as　never　has

any　other　fairy…tale　been　told　in　my　hearing。　　It　was　the

prettiest　of　them　all；　and　was　recited　by　the　heroine。



〃Why　were　the　king　and　queen　not　at　home？〃　David　would　ask　her