the little white bird-第15节

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gaily　in　the　Broad　Walk；　not　feeling　the　tiniest　bit　sorry　for

anybody。



Here；　however；　it　gradually　came　into　David's　eyes　that；　after

all；　I　was　a　strange　man；　and　they　opened　wider　and　wider；　until

they　were　the　size　of　my　medals；　and　then；　with　the　deliberation

that　distinguishes　his　smile；　he　slowly　prepared　to　howl。　　I　saw

all　his　forces　gathering　in　his　face；　and　I　had　nothing　to　oppose

to　them；　it　was　an　unarmed　man　against　a　regiment。



Even　then　I　did　not　chide　him。　　　He　could　not　know　that　it　was　I

who　had　dropped　the　letter。



I　think　I　must　have　stepped　over　a　grateful　fairy　at　that　moment；

for　who　else　could　have　reminded　me　so　opportunely　of　my　famous

manipulation　of　the　eyebrows；　forgotten　since　I　was　in　the　fifth

form？　　I　alone　of　boys　had　been　able　to　elevate　and　lower　my

eyebrows　separately；　when　the　one　was　climbing　my　forehead　the

other　descended　it；　like　the　two　buckets　in　the　well。



Most　diffidently　did　I　call　this　accomplishment　to　my　aid　now；

and　immediately　David　checked　his　forces　and　considered　my

unexpected　movement　without　prejudice。　　His　face　remained　as　it

was；　his　mouth　open　to　emit　the　howl　if　I　did　not　surpass

expectation。　　I　saw　that；　like　the　fair…minded　boy　he　has　always

been；　he　was　giving　me　my　chance；　and　I　worked　feverishly；　my

chief　fear　being　that；　owing　to　his　youth；　he　might　not　know　how

marvellous　was　this　thing　I　was　doing。　　It　is　an　appeal　to　the

intellect；　as　well　as　to　the　senses；　and　no　one　on　earth　can　do

it　except　myself。



When　I　paused　for　a　moment　exhausted　he　signed　gravely；　with

unchanged　face；　that　though　it　was　undeniably　funny；　he　had　not

yet　decided　whether　it　was　funny　enough；　and；　taking　this　for

encouragement；　at　it　I　went　once　more；　till　I　saw　his　forces

wavering；　when　I　sent　my　left　eyebrow　up　almost　farther　than　I

could　bring　it　back；　and　with　that　I　had　him；　the　smile　broke

through　the　clouds。



In　the　midst　of　my　hard…won　triumph　I　heard　cheering。



I　had　been　vaguely　conscious　that　we　were　not　quite　alone；　but

had　not　dared　to　look　away　from　David；　I　looked　now；　and　found　to

my　annoyance　that　I　was　the　centre　of　a　deeply　interested

gathering　of　children。　　There　was；　in　particular；　one　vulgar

little　street…　boy



However；　if　that　damped　me　in　the　moment　of　victory；　I　was　soon

to　triumph　gloriously　in　what　began　like　defeat。　　I　had　sat　me

down　on　one　of　the　garden…seats　in　the　Figs；　with　one　hand

resting　carelessly　on　the　perambulator；　in　imitation　of　the

nurses；　it　was　so　pleasant　to　assume　the　air　of　one　who　walked

with　David　daily；　when　to　my　chagrin　I　saw　Mary　approaching　with

quick　stealthy　steps；　and　already　so　near　me　that　flight　would

have　been　ignominy。　　Porthos；　of　whom　she　had　hold；　bounded

toward　me；　waving　his　traitorous　tail；　but　she　slowed　on　seeing

that　I　had　observed　her。　　She　had　run　me　down　with　my　own　dog。



I　have　not　mentioned　that　Porthos　had　for　some　time　now　been　a

visitor　at　her　house；　though　never　can　I　forget　the　shock　I　got

the　first　time　I　saw　him　strolling　out　of　it　like　an　afternoon

caller。　　Of　late　he　has　avoided　it；　crossing　to　the　other　side

when　I　go　that　way；　and　rejoining　me　farther　on；　so　I　conclude

that　Mary's　husband　is　painting　him。



I　waited　her　coming　stiffly；　in　great　depression　of　spirits；　and

noted　that　her　first　attentions　were　for　David；　who；　somewhat

shabbily；　gave　her　the　end　of　a　smile　which　had　been　begun　for

me。　It　seemed　to　relieve　her；　for　what　one　may　call　the　wild

maternal　look　left　her　face；　and　trying　to　check　little　gasps　of

breath；　the　result　of　unseemly　running；　she　signed　to　her

confederates　to　remain　in　the　background；　and　turned　curious　eyes

on　me。　　Had　she　spoken　as　she　approached；　I　am　sure　her　words

would　have　been　as　flushed　as　her　face；　but　now　her　mouth

puckered　as　David's　does　before　he　sets　forth　upon　his　smile；　and

I　saw　that　she　thought　she　had　me　in　a　parley　at　last。



〃I　could　not　help　being　a　little　anxious；〃　she　said　craftily；　but

I　must　own；　with　some　sweetness。



I　merely　raised　my　hat；　and　at　that　she　turned　quickly　to　DavidI

cannot　understand　why　the　movement　was　so　hastyand　lowered　her

face　to　his。　　Oh；　little　trump　of　a　boy！　　Instead　of　kissing　her；

he　seized　her　face　with　one　hand　and　tried　to　work　her　eyebrows

up　and　down　with　the　other。　　He　failed；　and　his　obvious

disappointment　in　his　mother　was　as　nectar　to　me。



〃I　don't　understand　what　you　want；　darling；〃　said　she　in

distress；　and　looked　at　me　inquiringly；　and　I　understood　what　he

wanted；　and　let　her　see　that　I　understood。　　Had　I　been　prepared

to　converse　with　her；　I　should　have　said　elatedly　that；　had　she

known　what　he　wanted；　still　she　could　not　have　done　it；　though

she　had　practised　for　twenty　years。



I　tried　to　express　all　this　by　another　movement　of　my　hat。



It　caught　David's　eye　and　at　once　he　appealed　to　me　with　the　most

perfect　confidence。　　She　failed　to　see　what　I　did；　for　I　shyly

gave　her　my　back；　but　the　effect　on　David　was　miraculous；　he

signed　to　her　to　go；　for　he　was　engaged　for　the　afternoon。



What　would　you　have　done　then；　reader？　　I　didn't。　　In　my　great

moment　I　had　strength　of　character　to　raise　my　hat　for　the　third

time　and　walk　away；　leaving　the　child　to　judge　between　us。　　I

walked　slowly；　for　I　knew　I　must　give　him　time　to　get　it　out；　and

I　listened　eagerly；　but　that　was　unnecessary；　for　when　it　did

come　it　was　a　very　roar　of　anguish。　　I　turned　my　head；　and　saw

David　fiercely　pushing　the　woman　aside；　that　he　might　have　one

last　long　look　at　me。　　He　held　out　his　wistful　arms　and　nodded

repeatedly；　and　I　faltered；　but　my　glorious　scheme　saved　me；　and

I　walked　on。　It　was　a　scheme　conceived　in　a　flash；　and　ever　since

relentlessly　pursued；　to　burrow　under　Mary's　influence　with　the

boy；　expose　her　to　him　in　all　her　vagaries；　take　him　utterly　from

her　and　make　him　mine。





XII



The　Pleasantest　Club　in　London



All　perambulators　lead　to　the　Kensington　Gardens。



Not；　however；　that　you　will　see　David　in　his　perambulator　much

longer；　for　soon　after　I　first　shook　his　faith　in　his　mother；　it

came　to　him　to　be　up　and　doing；　and　he　up　and　did　in　the　Broad

Walk　itself；　where　he　would　stand　alone　most　elaborately　poised；

signing　imperiously　to　the　British　public　to　time　him；　and

looking　his　most　heavenly　just　before　he　fell。　　He　fell　with　a

dump；　and　as　they　always　laughed　then；　he　pretended　that　this　was

his　funny　way　of　finishing。



That　was　on　a　Monday。　　On　Tuesday　he　climbed　the　stone　stair　of

the　Gold　King；　looking　over　his　shoulder　gloriously　at　each　step；

and　on　Wednesday　he　struck　three　and　went　into　knickerbockers。

For　the　Kensington　Gardens；　you　must　know；　are　full　of　short

cuts；　familiar　to　all　who　play　there；　and　the　shortest　leads　from

the　baby　in　long　clothes　to　the　little　boy　of　three　riding　on　the

fence。　　It　is　called　the　Mother's　Tragedy。



If　you　are　a　burgess　of　the　gardens　（which　have　a　vocabulary　of

their　own）；　the　faces　of　these　quaint　mothers　are　a　clock　to　you；

in　which　you　may　read　the　ages　of　their　young。　　When　he　is　three

they　are　said　to　wear　the　knickerbocker　face；　and　you　may　take　it

from　me　that　Mary　assumed　that　face　with　a　sigh；　fain　would　she

have　kept　her　boy　a　baby　longer；　but　he　insisted　on　his　rights；

and　I　encouraged　him　that　I　might　notch　another　point　against

her。　I　was　now　seeing　David　once　at　least　every　week；　his　mother；

who　remained　culpably　obtuse　to　my　sinister　design；　having

instructed　Irene　that　I　was　to　be　allowed　to　share　him　with　her；

and　we　had　become　close　friends；　though　the　little　nurse　was　ever

a　threatening　shadow　in　the　background。　　Irene；　in　short；　did　not

improve　with　acquaintance。　　I　found　her　to　be　high　and　mighty；

chiefly；　I　think；　because　she　now　wore　a　nurse's　cap　with

streamers；　of　which　the　little　creature　was　ludicrously　proud。

She　assumed　the　airs　of　an　official　person；　and　always　talked　as

if　generations　of　babies　had　passed　through　her　hands。　　She　was

also　extremely　jealous；　and　had　a　way　of　signifying　disapproval

of　my　methods　that　led　to　many　coldnesses　and　even　bickerings

between　us；　which　I　now　see　to　have　been　undignified。　　I　brought

the　following　accusations　against　her：



That　she　prated　too　much　about　right　and　wrong。



That　she　was　a　martinet。



That　she　pretended　it　was　a　real　cap；　with　real　streamers；　when

she　knew　Mary　had　made　the　whole　thing　out　of　a　muslin　blind。　　I

regret　having　used　this　argument；　but　it　was　the　only　one　that

really　damped　her。



On　the　other　hand；　she　accused　me　of　spoiling　him。



Of　not　thinking　of　his　future。



Of　never　asking　him　where　he　expected　to　go　to　if　he　did　such

things。



Of　telling　him　tales　that　had　no　moral　application。



Of　saying　that　the　handkerchief　disappeared　into　nothingness；

when　it　really　disappeared　into　a　small　tin　cup；　attached　to　my

person　by　a　piece　of　elastic。



To　this　la