hemingway, ernest - islands in the stream-第60节
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¨No。 It makes no difference。 You can cut his tongue out if you like。〃
¨No； I donˇt want to。 Nor nothing brutal ever。 But you were nice to offer it。〃
¨It wouldnˇt be a bad idea。 How are you？ You old love…house of always。〃
¨Iˇm the same。〃
¨Really the same？〃
¨The same as one always is。 Iˇm yours in this town。〃
¨Until the plane leaves。〃
¨Exactly；〃 she said and changed her position for the better in the car。 ¨Look；〃 she said。 ¨Weˇve left the shining part and itˇs dirty and smoky。 When didnˇt we do that？〃
¨Sometimes。〃
¨Yes；〃 she said。 ¨Sometimes。〃
Then they looked at the dirty and the smoky and her quick eyes and lovely intelligence saw everything instantly that had taken him so many years to see。
¨Now it gets better；〃 she said。 She had never told him a lie in his life and he had tried to never lie to her。 But he had been quite unsuccessful。
¨Do you still love me？〃 she asked。 ¨Tell me true without adornments。〃
¨Yes。 You ought to know。〃
¨I know；〃 she said； holding him to prove it if it could prove it。
¨Who is the man now？〃
¨Letˇs not talk about him。 You wouldnˇt care for him。〃
¨Maybe not；〃 he said and held her so close that it was as though something must break if both were truly serious。 It was their old game and she broke and the break was clean。
¨You donˇt have breasts；〃 she said。 ¨And you always win。〃
¨I donˇt have a face to break your heart。 Nor what you have and the long lovely legs。〃
¨You have something else。〃
¨Yes；〃 he said。 ¨Last night with a pillow and a cat making love。〃
¨Iˇll make up for the cat。 How far is it now？〃
¨Eleven minutes。〃
¨Thatˇs too far the way things are now。〃
¨Should I take it from him and drive it in eight？〃
¨No； please； and remember everything I taught you about patience。〃
¨That was the most intelligent and stupid lesson I learned。 Reteach it to me a little now。〃
¨Do I have to？〃
¨No。 It is only eight minutes now。〃
¨Will it be a nice place and will the bed be big？〃
¨We will have to see；〃 Thomas Hudson said。 ¨Are you starting to have your old doubts already？〃
¨No；〃 she said。 ¨I want a big； big bed。 To forget all about the army。〃
¨There is a big bed；〃 he said。 ¨Maybe not as big as the army。〃
¨You donˇt have to be rough；〃 she said。 ¨All the beautiful ones end up showing pictures of their wives。 You should know the Airbornes。〃
¨Iˇm glad I donˇt。 Weˇre a little waterlogged。 But we were never waterborne nor said so。〃
¨Can you tell me anything about it？〃 she asked him； her hand now soundly in his pocket。
¨No。〃
¨You never would and I love you for it。 But I get curious and people ask me and I worry。〃
¨Just be curious；〃 he said。 ¨And never worry。 Donˇt you remember that curiosity killed a cat？ Iˇve got a cat and heˇs curious enough。〃 He thought of Boise。 Then he said； ¨But worry kills big businessmen right in their prime。 Do I have to worry about you？〃
¨Only as an actress。 Then not too much。 Now itˇs only two minutes more。 Itˇs nice country now and I like it。 Can we have lunch in bed？〃
¨Can we go to sleep then； too？〃
¨Yes。 Itˇs not a sin； if we donˇt miss the plane。〃
The car climbed steeply now on the old stone…paved road with the big trees on either side。
¨Have you anything to miss？〃
¨You；〃 he said。
¨I mean duty。〃
¨Did I look as though I were on duty？〃
¨You might be。 Youˇre a wonderful actor。 The worst I ever saw。 I love you； my dear crazy；〃 she said。 ¨Iˇve seen you play all your great roles。 The one I loved you the best in was when you were playing the Faithful Husband and you were doing it so wonderfully and there was a big spot of natural juices showed on your trousers and every time you looked at me it was bigger。 That was in the Ritz； I think。〃
¨That was where I played the Faithful Husband best；〃 he said。 ¨Like Garrick at the Old Bailey。〃
¨Youˇre a little confused；〃 she said。 ¨I think you played it best on the Normandie。〃
¨When they burned her I didnˇt give a damn about anything for six days。〃
¨Thatˇs not your record。〃
¨No；〃 he said。
They were stopped at the gate now and the chauffeur was unlocking it。
¨Do we really live here？〃
¨Yes。 Up the hill。 Iˇm sorry the driveˇs in such bad shape。〃
The car climbed it through the mango trees and the unflowering flamboyanes； turned past the cattle sheds and on up the circular drive to the house。 He opened the door of the car and she stepped out as though conferring a warm and generous favor to the ground。
She looked at the house and could see the open windows of the bedroom。 They were big windows and in some way it reminded her of the Normandie。
¨Iˇll miss the plane；〃 she said。 ¨Why canˇt I be ill？ All the other women are ill。〃
¨I know two good doctors that will swear you are。〃
¨Wonderful；〃 she said； going up the stairs。 ¨We wonˇt have to ask them to dinner； will we？〃
¨No；〃 he said； opening the door； ¨Iˇll call them up and send the chauffeur for the certificates。〃
¨I am ill；〃 she said。 ¨Iˇve decided。 Let the troops entertain themselves for once。〃
¨Youˇll go。〃
¨No。 Iˇm going to entertain you。 Have you been entertained properly lately？〃
¨No。〃
¨Me either； or is it neither？〃
¨I donˇt know；〃 he said and held her close and looked in her eyes and then away。 He opened the door to the big bedroom。 ¨Itˇs neither；〃 he said reflectively。
The windows were open and the wind was in the room。 But it was pleasant now with the sun。
¨It is like the Normandie。 Did you make it like the Normandie for me？〃
¨Of course； darling；〃 he lied。 ¨What did you think？〃
¨Youˇre a worse liar than I am。〃
¨Iˇm not even faster。〃
¨Letˇs not lie。 Letˇs pretend you made it for me。〃
¨I made it for you；〃 he said。 ¨Only it looked like someone else。〃
¨Is that as hard as you can hold anyone？〃
¨Without breaking them。〃 Then he said； ¨Without lying down。〃
¨Who is against lying down？〃
¨Not me；〃 he said and picked her up and carried her to the bed。
¨Let me drop the jalousie。 I donˇt mind your entertaining the troops。 But we have a radio that entertains the kitchen。 They donˇt need us。〃
¨Now；〃 she said。
¨Yes。〃
¨Now remember everything I ever taught you。〃
¨Arenˇt I？〃
¨Now and then。〃
¨Then；〃 he said。 ¨Where did we know him？〃
¨We met him。 Donˇt you remember？〃
¨Look； letˇs not remember anything and letˇs not talk and letˇs not talk and letˇs not talk。〃
Afterwards she said； ¨People used to get hungry even on the Normandie。〃
¨Iˇll ring for the steward。〃
¨But this steward doesnˇt know us。〃
¨He will。〃
¨No。 Letˇs go out and see the house。 What have you painted？〃
¨What all nothing。〃
¨Donˇt you have time？〃
¨What do you think？〃
¨But couldnˇt you when youˇre ashore？〃
¨What do you mean ashore？〃
¨Tom；〃 she said。 They were in the living room now in the big old chairs and she had taken her shoes off to feel the matting on the floor。 She sat curled in the chair and she had brushed her hair to please him； and because of what she knew it did to him； and she sat so it swung like a heavy silken load when her head moved。
¨Damn you；〃 he said。 ¨Darling；〃 he added。
¨You damned me enough；〃 she said。
¨Letˇs not talk about it。〃
¨Why did you marry her； Tom？〃
¨Because you were in love。〃
¨It wasnˇt a very good reason。〃
¨Nobody ever said it was。 Especially not me。 But I donˇt have to make my errors and repent of them and then discuss them； do I？〃
¨If I want you to。〃
The big black and white cat had come in and he rubbed against her leg。
¨Heˇs got us mixed up；〃 Thomas Hudson said。 ¨Or maybe heˇs getting good sense。〃
¨It couldnˇt be？〃
¨Sure。 Of course。 Boy；〃 he called。
The cat came over to him and jumped into his lap。 It did not matter which one it was。
¨We might as well both love her； Boy。 Take a good look at her。 Youˇll never see any more womens like that。〃
¨Is he the one you sleep with？〃
¨Yes。 Is there any reason why I shouldnˇt？〃
¨None。 I like him better than the man I sleep with now and heˇs just about as sad。〃
¨Do we have to talk about him？〃
¨No。 And you donˇt have to pretend you havenˇt been at sea when your eyes are burned and there are white slit marks in the corners of them and your hair is as sun…streaked as though you used something on it〃
¨And I walk with a rolling gait and carry a parrot on my shoulder and hit people with my wooden leg。 Look； darling； I go to sea occasionally because I am a painter of marine life for the Museum of Natural History。 Not even war must interfere with our studies。〃
¨They are sacred；〃 she said。 ¨Iˇll remember that lie and stick with it。 Tom； you truly donˇt care for her at all？〃
¨Not at all。〃
¨You still love me？〃
¨Didnˇt I give any signs of it？〃
¨It could have been a role。 The one of the always faithful lover no matter what whores I find you with。 Thee hasnˇt been faithful to me； Cynara； in thy fashion。〃
¨
