the autobiography of a quack-第10节

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y　the　window　but　the　old　gentleman　with　sandy…gray　hair？　Along　with　him　was　a　stout　young　man　with　a　head　as　red　as　mine；　and　mustache　and　whiskers　to　match。　Probably　the　son；　I　thoughtardent　temperament；　remorse；　come　to　confess；　etc。　I　was　never　more　mistaken　in　my　life。　I　was　about　to　go　regularly　through　my　patients　when　the　old　gentleman　began　to　speak。

‘‘I　called；　doctor；''　said　he；　‘‘to　explain　the　little　matter　about　which　Iabout　which　I''

‘‘Troubled　your　spirits　yesterday；''　added　the　youth；　jocosely；　pulling　his　mustache。

‘‘Beg　pardon；''　I　returned；　‘‘had　we　not　better　talk　this　over　in　private？　Come　into　my　office；''　I　added；　touching　the　younger　man　on　the　arm。

Would　you　believe　it？　he　took　out　his　handkerchief　and　dusted　the　place　I　had　touched。　‘‘Better　not；''　said　he。　‘‘Go　on；　father；　let　us　get　done　with　this　den。''

‘‘Gentlemen；''　said　the　elder　person；　addressing　the　patients；　‘‘I　called　here　yesterday；　like　a　fool；　to　ask　who　had　stolen　from　me　a　sum　of　money　which　I　believed　I　left　in　my　room　on　going　out　in　the　morning。　This　doctor　here　and　his　spirits　contrived　to　make　me　suspect　my　only　son。　Well；　I　charged　him　at　once　with　the　crime　as　soon　as　I　got　back　home；　and　what　do　you　think　he　did？　He　said；　‘Father；　let　us　go　up…stairs　and　look　for　it；'　and''

Here　the　young　man　broke　in　with：　‘‘Come；　father；　don't　worry　yourself　for　nothing''；　and　then　turning；　added：　‘‘To　cut　the　thing　short；　he　found　the　notes　under　his　candle…　stick；　where　he　left　them　on　going　to　bed。　This　is　all　of　it。　We　came　here　to　stop　this　fellow''　（by　which　he　meant　me）　‘‘from　carrying　a　slander　further。　I　advise　you；　good　people；　to　profit　by　the　matter；　and　to　look　up　　a　more　honest　doctor；　if　doctoring　be　what　you　want。''

As　soon　as　he　had　ended；　I　remarked　solemnly：　‘‘The　words　of　the　spirits　are　not　my　words。　Who　shall　hold　them　accountable？''

‘‘Nonsense；''　said　the　young　man。　‘‘Come；　father''；　and　they　left　the　room。

Now　was　the　time　to　retrieve　my　character。　‘‘Gentlemen；''　said　I；　‘‘you　have　heard　this　very　singular　account。　Trusting　the　spirits　utterly　and　entirely　as　I　do；　it　occurs　to　me　that　there　is　no　reason　why　they　may　not；　after　all；　have　been　right　in　their　suspicions　of　this　young　person。　Who　can　say　that；　overcome　by　remorse；　he　may　not　have　seized　the　time　of　his　father's　absence　to　replace　the　money？''

To　my　amazement；　up　gets　a　little　old　man　from　the　corner。　‘‘Well；　you　are　a　low　cuss！''　said　he；　and　taking　up　a　basket　beside　him；　hobbled　hastily　out　of　the　room。　You　may　be　sure　I　said　some　pretty　sharp　things　to　him；　for　I　was　out　of　humor　to　begin　with；　and　it　is　one　thing　to　be　insulted　by　a　stout　young　man；　and　quite　another　to　be　abused　by　a　wretched　old　cripple。　However；　he　went　away；　and　I　supposed；　for　my　part；　that　I　was　done　with　the　whole　business。

An　hour　later；　however；　I　heard　a　rough　knock　at　my　door；　and　opening　it　hastily；　saw　my　red…headed　young　man　with　the　cripple。

‘‘Now；''　said　the　former；　taking　me　by　the　collar；　and　pulling　me　into　the　room　among　my　patients；　‘‘I　want　to　know；　my　man；　if　this　doctor　said　that　it　was　likely　I　was　the　thief　after　all？''

‘‘That's　what　he　said；''　replied　the　cripple；　‘‘just　about　that；　sir。''

I　do　not　desire　to　dwell　on　the　after　conduct　of　this　hot…headed　young　man。　It　was　the　more　disgraceful　as　I　offered　but　little　resistance；　and　endured　a　beating　such　as　I　would　have　hesitated　to　inflict　upon　a　dog。　Nor　was　this　all。　He　warned　me　that　if　I　dared　to　remain　in　the　city　after　a　week　he　would　shoot　me。　In　the　East　I　should　have　thought　but　little　of　such　a　threat；　but　here　it　was　only　too　likely　to　be　practically　carried　out。　Accordingly；　with　my　usual　decision　of　character；　but　with　much　grief　and　reluctance；　I　collected　my　whole　fortune；　which　now　amounted　to　at　least　seven　thousand　dollars；　and　turned　my　back　upon　this　ungrateful　town。　I　am　sorry　to　say　that　I　also　left　behind　me　the　last　of　my　good　luck。

I　traveled　in　a　leisurely　way　until　I　reached　Boston。　The　country　anywhere　would　have　been　safer；　but　I　do　not　lean　to　agricultural　pursuits。　It　seemed　an　agreeable　city；　and　I　decided　to　remain。

I　took　good　rooms　at　Parker's；　and　concluding　to　enjoy　life；　amused　myself　in　the　company　of　certain；　I　may　say　uncertain；　young　women　who　danced　at　some　of　the　theaters。　I　played　billiards；　drank　rather　too　much；　drove　fast　horses；　and　at　the　end　of　a　delightful　year　was　shocked　to　find　myself　in　debt；　and　with　only　seven　dollars　and　fifty…three　cents　leftI　like　to　be　accurate。　I　had　only　one　resource：　I　determined　to　visit　my　deaf　aunt　and　Peninnah；　and　to　see　what　I　could　do　in　the　role　of　the　prodigal　nephew。　At　all　events；　I　should　gain　time　to　think　of　what　new　enterprise　I　could　take　up；　but；　above　all；　I　needed　a　little　capital　and　a　house　over　my　head。　I　had　pawned　nearly　everything　of　any　value　which　I　possessed。

I　left　my　debts　to　gather　interest；　and　went　away　to　Woodbury。　It　was　the　day　before　Christmas　when　I　reached　the　little　Jersey　town；　and　it　was　also　by　good　luck　Sunday。　　　I　was　hungry　and　quite　penniless。　I　wandered　about　until　church　had　begun；　because　I　was　sure　then　to　find　Aunt　Rachel　and　　Peninnah　out　at　the　service；　and　I　desired　to　explore　a　little。　The　house　was　closed；　and　even　the　one　servant　absent。　I　got　in　with　ease　at　the　back　through　the　kitchen；　and　having　at　least　an　hour　and　a　half　free　from　interruption；　I　made　a　leisurely　search。　The　role　of　prodigal　was　well　enough；　but　here　was　a　better　chance　and　an　indulgent　opportunity。

In　a　few　moments　I　found　the　famous　Bible　hid　away　under　Aunt　Rachel's　mattress。　The　Bible　bank　was　fat　with　notes；　but　I　intended　to　be　moderate　enough　to　escape　suspicion。　Here　were　quite　two　thousand　dollars。　I　resolved　to　take；　just　now；　only　one　hundred；　so　as　to　keep　a　good　balance。　Then；　alas！　I　lit　on　a　long　envelop；　my　aunt's　will。　Every　cent　was　left　to　Christ　Church；　not　a　dime　to　poor　Pen　or　to　me。　I　was　in　a　rage。　I　tore　up　the　will　and　replaced　the　envelop。　To　treat　poor　Pen　that　wayPen　of　all　people！　There　was　a　heap　more　will　than　testament；　for　all　it　was　in　the　Bible。　After　that　I　thought　it　was　right　to　punish　the　old　witch；　and　so　I　took　every　note　I　could　find。　When　I　was　through　with　this　business；　I　put　back　the　Bible　under　the　mattress；　and　observing　that　I　had　been　quite　too　long；　I　went　down…　stairs　with　a　keen　desire　to　leave　the　town　as　early　as　possible。　I　was　tempted；　however；　to　look　further；　and　was　rewarded　by　finding　in　an　old　clock　case　a　small　reticule　stuffed　with　bank…notes。　This　I　appropriated；　and　made　haste　to　go　out。　I　was　too　late。　As　I　went　into　the　little　entry　to　get　my　hat　and　coat；　Aunt　Rachel　entered；　followed　by　Peninnah。

At　sight　of　me　my　aunt　cried　out　that　I　was　a　monster　and　fit　for　the　penitentiary。　As　she　could　not　hear　at　all；　she　had　the　talk　to　herself；　and　went　by　me　and　up…stairs；　rumbling　abuse　like　distant　thunder　overhead。

Meanwhile　I　was　taken　up　with　Pen。　The　pretty　fool　was　seated　on　a　chair；　all　dressed　up　in　her　Sunday　finery；　and　rocking　backward　and　forward；　crying；　‘‘Oh；　oh；　ah！''　like　a　lamb　saying；　‘‘Baa；　baa；　baa！''　She　never　had　much　sense。　I　had　to　shake　her　to　get　a　reasonable　word。　She　mopped　her　eyes；　and　I　heard　her　gasp　out　that　my　aunt　had　at　last　decided　that　I　was　the　person　who　had　thinned　her　hoards。　This　was　bad；　but　involved　less　inconvenience　than　it　might　have　done　an　hour　earlier。　Amid　tears　Pen　told　me　that　a　detective　had　been　at　the　house　inquiring　for　me。　When　this　happened　it　seems　that　the　　poor　little　goose　had　tried　to　fool　deaf　Aunt　Rachel　with　some　made…up　story　as　to　the　man　having　come　about　taxes。　I　suppose　the　girl　was　not　any　too　sharp；　and　the　old　woman；　I　guess；　read　enough　from　merely　seeing　the　man's　lips。　You　never　could　keep　anything　from　her；　and　she　was　both　curious　and　suspicious。　She　assured　the　officer　that　I　was　a　thief；　and　hoped　I　might　be　caught。　I　could　not　learn　whether　the　man　told　Pen　any　particulars；　but　as　I　was　slowly　getting　at　the　facts　we　heard　a　loud　scream　and　a　heavy　fall。

Pen　said；　‘‘Oh；　oh！''　and　we　hurried　up…　stairs。　There　was　the　old　woman　on　the　floor；　her　face　twitching　to　right；　and　her　breathing　a　sort　of　hoarse　croak。　The　big　Bible　lay　open　on　the　floor；　and　I　knew　what　had　happened。　It　was　a　fit　of　apoplexy。

At　this　very　unpleasant　sight　Pen　seemed　to　recover　her　wits；　and　said：　‘‘Go　away；　go　away！　Oh；　brother；　brother；　now　I　know　you　have　stolen　her　money　and　killed　her；　andand　I　loved　you；　I　was　so　proud　of　you！　Oh；　oh！''

This　was　all　very　fine；　but　the　advice　was　good。　I　said：　‘‘Yes；　I　had　better　go。　Run　and　get　some　onea　doctor。　It　is　a　fit　of　　hysterics；　there　is　no　danger。　I　will　write　to　you。　You　are　quite　mistaken。''

This　was　too　feeble　even　for　Pen；　and　she　cried：

‘‘No；　never；　I　never　want　to　see　you　again。　You　would　kill　me　next。''

‘‘Stuff！''　said　I；　and　ran　down…stairs。　I　seized　my　coat　and　hat；　and　went　to　the　tavern；　where　I　got　a　man　to　drive　me　to　Camden。　I　have　never　seen　Pen　since。　As　I　crossed　the　ferry　to　Philadelphia　I　saw　that　I　should　have　asked　when　the　detective　had　been　after　me。　I　suspected　from　Pen's　terror　that　it　had　been　recently。

It　was　Sunday　and；　as　I　reminded