david copperfield(大卫.科波维尔)-第114节
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‘Oh! and that’s a reason why you want relief and change—
excitement and all that?’ said she。 ‘Ah! very true! But isn’t it a
little—Eh?—for him; I don’t mean you?’
A quick glance of her eye towards the spot where Steerforth
was walking; with his mother leaning on his arm; showed me
whom she meant; but beyond that; I was quite lost。 And I looked
so; I have no doubt。
‘Don’t it—I don’t say that it does; mind I want to know—don’t it
rather engross him? Don’t it make him; perhaps; a little more
remiss than usual in his visits to his blindly…doting—eh?’ With
another quick glance at them; and such a glance at me as seemed
to look into my innermost thoughts。
‘Miss Dartle;’ I returned; ‘pray do not think—’
‘I don’t!’ she said。 ‘Oh dear me; don’t suppose that I think
anything! I am not suspicious。 I only ask a question。 I don’t state
any opinion。 I want to found an opinion on what you tell me。 Then;
it’s not so? Well! I am very glad to know it。’
‘It certainly is not the fact;’ said I; perplexed; ‘that I am
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accountable for Steerforth’s having been away from home longer
than usual—if he has been: which I really don’t know at this
moment; unless I understand it from you。 I have not seen him this
long while; until last night。’
‘No?’
‘Indeed; Miss Dartle; no!’
As she looked full at me; I saw her face grow sharper and paler;
and the marks of the old wound lengthen out until it cut through
the disfigured lip; and deep into the nether lip; and slanted down
the face。 There was something positively awful to me in this; and
in the brightness of her eyes; as she said; looking fixedly at me:
‘What is he doing?’
I repeated the words; more to myself than her; being so
amazed。
‘What is he doing?’ she said; with an eagerness that seemed
enough to consume her like a fire。 ‘In what is that man assisting
him; who never looks at me without an inscrutable falsehood in his
eyes? If you are honourable and faithful; I don’t ask you to betray
your friend。 I ask you only to tell me; is it anger; is it hatred; is it
pride; is it restlessness; is it some wild fancy; is it love; what is it;
that is leading him?’
‘Miss Dartle;’ I returned; ‘how shall I tell you; so that you will
believe me; that I know of nothing in Steerforth different from
what there was when I first came here? I can think of nothing。 I
firmly believe there is nothing。 I hardly understand even what you
mean。’
As she still stood looking fixedly at me; a twitching or
throbbing; from which I could not dissociate the idea of pain; came
into that cruel mark; and lifted up the corner of her lip as if with
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scorn; or with a pity that despised its object。 She put her hand
upon it hurriedly—a hand so thin and delicate; that when I had
seen her hold it up before the fire to shade her face; I had
compared it in my thoughts to fine porcelain—and saying; in a
quick; fierce; passionate way; ‘I swear you to secrecy about this!’
said not a word more。
Mrs。 Steerforth was particularly happy in her son’s society; and
Steerforth was; on this occasion; particularly attentive and
respectful to her。 It was very interesting to me to see them
together; not only on account of their mutual affection; but
because of the strong personal resemblance between them; and
the manner in which what was haughty or impetuous in him was
softened by age and sex; in her; to a gracious dignity。 I thought;
more than once; that it was well no serious cause of division had
ever come between them; or two such natures—I ought rather to
express it; two such shades of the same nature—might have been
harder to reconcile than the two extremest opposites in creation。
The idea did not originate in my own discernment; I am bound to
confess; but in a speech of Rosa Dartle’s。
She said at dinner:
‘Oh; but do tell me; though; somebody; because I have been
thinking about it all day; and I want to know。’
‘You want to know what; Rosa?’ returned Mrs。 Steerforth。
‘Pray; pray; Rosa; do not be mysterious。’
‘Mysterious!’ she cried。 ‘Oh! really? Do you consider me so?’
‘Do I constantly entreat you;’ said Mrs。 Steerforth; ‘to speak
plainly; in your own natural manner?’
‘Oh! then this is not my natural manner?’ she rejoined。 ‘Now
you must really bear with me; because I ask for information。 We
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never know ourselves。’
‘It has become a second nature;’ said Mrs。 Steerforth; without
any displeasure; ‘but I remember;—and so must you; I think;—
when your manner was different; Rosa; when it was not so
guarded; and was more trustful。’
‘I am sure you are right;’ she returned; ‘and so it is that bad
habits grow upon one! Really? Less guarded and more trustful?
How can I; imperceptibly; have changed; I wonder! Well; that’s
very odd! I must study to regain my former self。’
‘I wish you would;’ said Mrs。 Steerforth; with a smile。
‘Oh! I really will; you know!’ she answered。 ‘I will learn
frankness from—let me see—from James。’
‘You cannot learn frankness; Rosa;’ said Mrs。 Steerforth
quickly—for there was always some effect of sarcasm in what Rosa
Dartle said; though it was said; as this was; in the most
unconscious manner in the world—‘in a better school。’
‘That I am sure of;’ she answered; with uncommon fervour。 ‘If I
am sure of anything; of course; you know; I am sure of that。’
Mrs。 Steerforth appeared to me to regret having been a little
nettled; for she presently said; in a kind tone:
‘Well; my dear Rosa; we have not heard what it is that you want
to be satisfied about?’
‘That I want to be satisfied about?’ she replied; with provoking
coldness。 ‘Oh! It was only whether people; who are like each other
in their moral constitution—is that the phrase?’
‘It’s as good a phrase as another;’ said Steerforth。
‘Thank you:—whether people; who are like each other in their
moral constitution; are in greater danger than people not so
circumstanced; supposing any serious cause of variance to arise
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between them; of being divided angrily and deeply?’
‘I should say yes;’ said Steerforth。
‘Should you?’ she retorted。 ‘Dear me! Supposing then; for
instance—any unlikely thing will do for a supposition—that you
and your mother were to have a serious quarrel。’
‘My dear Rosa;’ interposed Mrs。 Steerforth; laughing goodnaturedly; ‘suggest some other supposition! James and I know our
duty to each other better; I pray Heaven!’
‘Oh!’ said Miss Dartle; nodding her head thoughtfully。 ‘To be
sure。 That would prevent it? Why; of course it would。 Exactly。
Now; I am glad I have been so foolish as to put the case; for it is so
very good to know that your duty to each other would prevent it!
Thank you very much。’
One other little circumstance connected with Miss Dartle I
must not omit; for I had reason to remember it thereafter; when all
the irremediable past was rendered plain。 During the whole of this
day; but especially from this period of it; Steerforth exerted
himself with his utmost skill; and that was with his utmost ease; to
charm this singular creature into a pleasant and pleased
companion。 That he should succeed; was no matter of surprise to
me。 That she should struggle against the fascinating influence of
his delightful art—delightful nature I thought it then—did not
surprise me either; for I knew that she was sometimes jaundiced
and perverse。 I saw her features and her manner slowly change; I
saw her look at him with growing admiration; I saw her try; more
and more faintly; but always angrily; as if she condemned a
weakness in herself; to resist the captivating power that he
possessed; and finally; I saw her sharp glance soften; and her smile
become quite gentle; and I ceased to be afraid of her as I had really
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been all day; and we all sat about the fire; talking and laughing
together; with as little reserve as if we had been children。
Whether it was because we had sat there so long; or because
Steerforth was resolved not to lose the advantage he had gained; I
do not know; but we did not remain in the dining…room more than
five minutes after her departure。 ‘She is playing her harp;’ said
Steerforth; softly; at the drawing…room door; ‘and nobody but my
mother has heard her do that; I believe; these three years。’ He said
it with a curious smile; which was gone directly; and we went into
the room and found her alone。
‘Don’t get up;’ said Steerforth (which she had already done)’ my
dear Rosa; don’t! Be kind for once; and sing us an Irish song。’
‘What do you care for an Irish song?’ she returned。
‘Much!’ said Steerforth。 ‘Much more than for any other。 Here is
Daisy; too; loves music f