the cost-第36节

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〃Don't！〃　she　interrupted；　her　voice　a　cry　of　pain。　　〃I　can't　bear　it！　　Don't！〃　　Years　of　false　self…sacrifice；　of　deceiving　her　parents　and　her　child；　of　self…suppression　and　self…degradation；　and　this　final　cruelty　to　Gladysall；　all　in　vain；　all　a　heaping　of　folly　upon　folly；　of　wrong　upon　wrong。

She　rushed　toward　the　house。　　She　must　fly　somewhereanywhereto　escape　the　thoughts　that　were　picking　with　sharp　beaks　at　her　aching　heart。　　Half…way　up　the　walk　she　turned　and　fled　to　a　refuge　she　would　not　have　thought　of　half　an　hour　before　to　her　father's　arms。

〃Oh；　father；〃　she　cried。　　〃If　I　had　only　known　you！〃


Gladys；　returning　from　her　walk；　went　directly　to　Pauline's　sitting…room。

〃I'm　off　for　New　York　and　Europe　to…morrow　morning；〃　she　began　abruptly；　her　voice　hard；　her　expression　bitter　and　reckless。

〃Where　can　she　have　heard　about　Leonora？〃　thought　Pauline。　　She　said　in　a　strained　voice：　　〃I　had　hoped　you　would　stay　here　to　look　after　the　house。〃

〃To　look　after　the　house？　　What　do　you　mean？〃　asked　Gladys。　　But　she　was　too　full　of　herself　to　be　interested　in　the　answer；　and　went　on：　　〃I　want　you　to　forget　what　I　said　to　you。　　I've　got　over　all　that。　　I've　come　to　my　senses。〃

Pauline　began　a　nervous　turning　of　her　rings。

Gladys　gave　a　short；　grim　laugh。　　〃I　detest　him；〃　she　went　on。　　〃We're　very　changeable；　we　women；　aren't　we？　　I　went　out　of　this　house　two　hours　ago　loving　himto　distraction。　　I　came　back　hating　him。　　And　all　that　has　happened　in　between　is　that　I　met　him　and　he　kissed　me　a　few　times　and　stabbed　my　pride　a　few　times。〃

Pauline　stopped　turning　her　ringsshe　rose　slowly；　mechanically；　looked　straight　at　Gladys。

〃That　is　not　true；〃　she　said　calmly。

Gladys　laughed　sardonically。　　〃You　don't　know　the　cold　and　haughty　Governor　Scarborough。　　There's　fire　under　the　ice。　　I　can　feel　the　places　on　my　face　where　it　scorched。　　Can't　you　see　them？〃

Pauline　gave　her　a　look　of　disgust。　　〃How　like　John　Dumont's　sister！〃　she　thought。　　And　she　shut　herself　in　her　room　and　stayed　there；　pleading　illness　in　excuse；　until　Gladys　was　gone。



XXIII。

A　SEA　SURPRISE。


On　the　third　day　from　New　York；　Gladys　was　so　far　recovered　from　seasickness　that　she　dragged　herself　to　the　deck。　　The　water　was　fairly　smooth；　but　a　sticky；　foggy　rain　was　falling。　　A　deck…steward　put　her　steamer…chair　in　a　sheltered　corner。　　Her　maid　and　a　stewardess　swathed　her　in　capes　and　rugs；　she　closed　her　eyes　and　said：　　〃Now　leave　me；　please；　and　don't　come　near　me　till　I　send　for　you。〃

She　slept　an　hour。　　When　she　awoke　she　felt　better。　　Some　one　had　drawn　a　chair　beside　hers　and　was　seated　therea　man；　for　she　caught　the　faint　odor　of　a　pipe；　though　the　wind　was　the　other　way。　　She　turned　her　head。　　It　was　Langdon；　whom　she　had　not　seen　since　she　went　below　a　few　hours　after　Sandy　Hook　disappeared。　　Indeed；　she　had　almost　forgotten　that　he　was　on　board　and　that　her　brother　had　asked　him　to　look　after　her。　　He　was　staring　at　her　in　an　absent…minded　way；　his　wonted　expression　　of　satire　and　lazy　good…humor　fainter　than　usual。　　In　fact；　his　face　was　almost　serious。

〃That　pipe；〃　she　grumbled。　　〃Please　do　put　it　away。〃

He　tossed　it　into　the　sea。　　〃Beg　pardon；〃　he　said。　　〃It　was　stupid　of　me。　　I　was　absorbed　inin　my　book。〃

〃What's　the　name　of　it？〃

He　turned　it　to　glance　at　the　cover；　but　she　went　on：　　〃Nodon't　tell　me。　　I've　no　desire　to　know。　　I　asked　merely　to　confirm　my　suspicion。〃

〃You're　right；〃　he　said。　　〃I　wasn't　reading。　　I　was　looking　at　you。〃

〃That　was　impertinent。　　A　man　should　not　look　at　a　woman　when　she　doesn't　intend　him　to　look。〃

〃Then　I'd　never　look　at　all。　　I'm　interested　only　in　things　not　meant　for　my　eyes。　　I　might　even　read　letters　not　addressed　to　me　if　I　didn't　know　how　dull　letters　are。　　No　intelligent　person　ever　says　anything　in　a　letter　nowadays。　　They　use　the　telegraph　for　ordinary　correspondence；　and　telepathy　for　the　other　kind。　　But　it　was　interestinglooking　at　you　as　you　lay　asleep。〃

〃Was　my　mouth　open？〃

〃A　little。〃

〃Am　I　yellow？〃

〃Very。〃

〃Eyes　red？　　Hair　in　strings？　　Lips　blue？〃

〃All　that；〃　he　said；　〃and　skin　somewhat　mottled。　　But　I　was　not　so　much　interested　in　your　beauty　as　I　was　in　trying　to　determine　whether　you　were　well　enough　to　stand　two　shocks。〃

〃I　need　them；〃　replied　Gladys。

〃One　is　rather　unpleasant；　the　otherthe　reverse；　in　fact　a　happiness。〃

〃The　unpleasant　first；　please。〃

〃Certainly；〃　he　replied。　　〃Always　the　medicine　first；　then　the　candy。〃　　And　he　leaned　back　and　closed　his　eyes　and　seemed　to　be　settling　himself　for　indefinite　silence。

〃Go　on；〃　she　said　impatiently。　　〃What's　the　medicine？　　A　death？〃

〃I　said　unpleasant；　didn't　I？　　When　an　enemy　dies　it's　all　joy。　　When　a　friend　passes　over　to　eternal　bliss；　why；　being　good　Christians；　we　are　not　so　faithless　and　selfish　as　to　let　the　momentary　separation　distress　us。〃

〃But　what　is　it？　　You're　trying　to　gain　time　by　all　this　beating　about　the　bush。　　You　ought　to　know　me　well　enough　to　know　you　can　speak　straight　out。〃

〃Fanshaw's　suing　his　wife　for　divorceand　he　names　Jack。〃

〃Is　that　your　news？〃　said　Gladys；　languidly。　　Suddenly　she　flung　aside　the　robes　and　sat　up。

〃What's　Pauline　going　to　do？　　Can　she〃　Gladys　paused。

〃Yes；　she　canif　she　wishes　to。〃

〃Butwill　she？　　Will　she？〃　demanded　Gladys。

〃Jack　doesn't　know　what　she'll　do；〃　replied　Langdon。　　〃He's　keeping　quietthe　only　sane　course　when　that　kind　of　storm　breaks。　　He　had　hoped　you'd　be　there　to　smooth　her　down；　but　he　says　when　he　opened　the　subject　of　your　going　back　to　Saint　X　you　cut　him　off。〃

〃Does　she　know？〃

〃Somebody　must　have　told　her　the　day　you　left。　　Don't　you　remember；　she　was　taken　ill　suddenly？〃

〃Oh！〃　Gladys　vividly　recalled　Pauline's　strange　look　and　manner。　　She　could　see　her　sister…in…lawthe　long；　lithe　form；　the　small；　graceful　head；　with　its　thick；　soft；　waving　hair；　the　oval　face；　the　skin　as　fine　as　the　petals　at　the　heart　of　a　rose；　the　arched　brows　and　golden…brown　eyes；　that　look；　that　air；　as　of　buoyant　life　locked　in　the　spell　of　an　icy　trance；　mysterious；　fascinating；　sometimes　so　melancholy。

〃I　almost　hope　she'll　do　it；　Mowbray；〃　she　said。　　〃Jack　doesn't　deserve　her。　　He's　not　a　bit　her　sort。　　She　ought　to　have　married〃

〃Some　one　who　had　her　sort　of　idealssome　one　like　that　big；　handsome　chapthe　one　you　admired　so　franticallyGovernor　Scarborough。　　He　was　chock　full　of　ideals。　　And　he's　making　the　sort　of　career　she　could　sympathize　with。〃

〃Scarborough！〃　exclaimed　Gladys；　with　some　success　at　self…concealment。　　〃I　detest　him！　　I　detest　‘careers'！〃

〃Good；〃　said　Langdon；　his　face　serious；　his　eyes　amused。　　〃That　opens　the　way　for　my　other　shock。〃

〃Oh；　the　good　news。　　What　is　it？〃

〃That　I'd　like　it　if　you'd　marry　me。〃

Gladys　glanced　into　his　still　amused　eyes；　then　with　a　shrug　sank　back　among　her　wraps。　　〃A　poor　joke；〃　she　said。

〃I　should　say　that　marriage　was　a　stale　joke　rather　than　a　poor　one。　　Will　you　try　itwith　me？　　You　might　do　worse。〃

〃How　did　you　have　the　courage　to　speak　when　I'm　looking　such　a　wreck？〃　she　asked　with　mock　gravity。

〃But　you　ain'tyou're　looking　better　now。　　That　first　shock　braced　you　up。　　Besides；　this　isn't　romance。　　It's　no　high　flight　with　all　the　longer　drop　and　all　the　harder　jolt　at　the　landing。　　It's　a　plain；　practical　proposition。〃

Gladys　slowly　sat　up　and　studied　him　curiously。

〃Do　you　really　mean　it？〃　she　asked。　　Each　was　leaning　on　an　elbow；　gazing　gravely　into　the　other's　face。

〃I'd　never　joke　on　such　a　dangerous　subject　as　marriage。　　I'm　far　too　timid　for　that。　　What　do　you　say；　Gladys？〃

She　had　never　seen　him　look　serious　before；　and　she　was　thinking　that　the　expression　became　him。

〃He　knows　how　to　make　himself　attractive　to　a　woman　when　he　cares　to；〃　she　said　to　herself。

〃I'd　like　a　man　that　has　lightness　of　mind。　　Serious　people　bore　one　so　after　a　while。〃　　By　〃serious　people〃　she　meant　one　serious　person　whom　she　had　admired　particularly　for　his　seriousness。　　But　she　was　in　another　mood　now；　another　atmospherethe　atmosphere　she　had　breathed　since　she　was　thirteen；　except　in　the　brief　period　when　her　infatuation　for　Scarborough　had　swept　her　away　from　her　world。

〃No！〃　　She　shook　her　head　with　decisionand　felt　decided。　　But　to　his　practised　ear　there　was　in　her　voice　a　hint　that　she　might　hear　him　further　on　the　subject。

They　lay　back　in　their　chairs；　he　watching　the　ragged；　dirty；　scurrying　clouds；　she　watching　him。　　After　a　while　he　said：　　〃Where　are　you　going　when　we　reach　the　other　side？〃

〃To　join　mother　and　auntie。〃

〃And　how　long　will　you　stay　with　them？〃

〃Not　more　than　a　week；　I　should　say；〃　she　answered　with　a　grimace。

〃And　thenwhere？〃

She　did　not　reply　for　some　time。　　Studying　her　face；　he　saw　an　expression　of　lonesomeness　gather　and　strengthen　and　deepen　until　she　looked　so　forlorn　that　he　felt　as　if　he　must　take　her　in　his　arms。　　When　she　spoke　it　was　to　say　dubiously：　　〃Back　to　New　Yorkto　keep　house　for　my　brotherperhaps。〃

〃And　when　his　wife　frees　herself　and　he　marries　againwhere　will　you　go？〃

Gladys　lifted　a　fold　of　her　cape　and　drew　it　about　her　as　if　she　were　cold。　　But　he　noted　that　it　hid　her　face　from　him。

〃You　wantyou　needa　hom