five tales-第53节

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rug；　Holly　and　the　dog　Balthasar　teased　and　loved　each　other；　and　in　the　shade　old　Jolyon　with　his　legs　crossed　and　his　cigar　luxuriously　savoured；　gazed　at　Irene　sitting　in　the　swing。　　A　light；　vaguely　swaying；　grey　figure　with　a　fleck　of　sunlight　here　and　there　upon　it；　lips　just　opened；　eyes　dark　and　soft　under　lids　a　little　drooped。　　She　looked　content；　surely　it　did　her　good　to　come　and　see　him！　　The　selfishness　of　age　had　not　set　its　proper　grip　on　him；　for　he　could　still　feel　pleasure　in　the　pleasure　of　others；　realising　that　what　he　wanted；　though　much；　was　not　quite　all　that　mattered。

〃It's　quiet　here；〃　he　said；　〃you　mustn't　come　down　if　you　find　it　dull。　　But　it's　a　pleasure　to　see　you。　　My　little　sweet's　is　the　only　face　which　gives　me　any　pleasure；　except　yours。〃

》From　her　smile　he　knew　that　she　was　not　beyond　liking　to　be　appreciated；　and　this　reassured　him。　　〃That's　not　humbug；〃　he　said。　〃I　never　told　a　woman　I　admired　her　when　I　didn't。　　In　fact　I　don't　know　when　I've　told　a　woman　I　admired　her；　except　my　wife　in　the　old　days；　and　wives　are　funny。〃　　He　was　silent；　but　resumed　abruptly：

〃She　used　to　expect　me　to　say　it　more　often　than　I　felt　it；　and　there　we　were。〃　　Her　face　looked　　mysteriously　troubled；　and；　afraid　that　he　had　said　something　painful；　he　hurried　on：　〃When　my　little　sweet　marries；　I　hope　she'll　find　someone　who　knows　what　women　feel。　　I　shan't　be　here　to　see　it；　but　there's　too　much　　topsy…turvydom　in　marriage；　I　don't　want　her　to　pitch　up　against　that。〃　　And；　aware　that　he　had　made　bad　worse；　he　added：　〃That　dog　will　scratch。〃

A　silence　followed。　　Of　what　was　she　thinking；　this　pretty　creature　whose　life　was　spoiled；　who　had　done　with　love；　and　yet　was　made　for　love？　　Some　day　when　he　was　gone；　perhaps；　she　would　find　another　matenot　so　disorderly　as　that　young　fellow　who　had　got　himself　run　over。　　Ah！　but　her　husband？

〃Does　Soames　never　trouble　you？〃　he　asked。

She　shook　her　head。　　Her　face　had　closed　up　　suddenly。　　For　all　her　softness　there　was　something　irreconcilable　about　her。　　And　a　glimpse　of　light　on　the　inexorable　nature　of　sex　antipathies　strayed　into　a　brain　which；　belonging　to　early　Victorian　civil…isationso　much　older　than　this　of　his　old　agehad　never　thought　about　such　primitive　things。

〃That's　a　comfort；〃　he　said。　　〃You　can　see　the　Grand　Stand　to…day。　Shall　we　take　a　turn　round？〃

Through　the　flower　and　fruit　garden；　against　whose　high　outer　walls　peach　trees　and　nectarines　were　trained　to　the　sun；　through　the　stables；　the　vinery；　the　mushroom　house；　the　asparagus　beds；　the　rosery；　the　summer…house；　he　conducted　hereven　into　the　kitchen　garden　to　see　the　tiny　green　peas　which　Holly　loved　to　scoop　out　of　their　pods　with　her　finger；　and　lick　up　from　the　palm　of　her　little　brown　hand。　　Many　delightful　things　he　showed　her；　while　Holly　and　the　dog　Balthasar　danced　ahead；　or　came　to　them　at　intervals　for　attention。　　It　was　one　of　the　happiest　afternoons　he　had　ever　spent；　but　it　tired　him　and　he　was　glad　to　sit　down　in　the　music　room　and　let　her　give　him　tea。　　A　special　little　friend　of　Holly's　had　come　ina　fair　child　with　short　hair　like　a　boy's。　　And　the　two　sported　in　the　distance；　under　the　stairs；　on　the　stairs；　and　up　in　the　gallery。　　Old　Jolyon　begged　for　Chopin。　　She　played　studies；　mazurkas；　waltzes；　till　the　two　children；　creeping　near；　stood　at　the　foot　of　the　piano　their　dark　and　golden　heads　bent　forward；　listening。　　Old　Jolyon　watched。

〃Let's　see　you　dance；　you　two！〃

Shyly；　with　a　false　start；　they　began。　　Bobbing　and　circling；　earnest；　not　very　adroit；　they　went　past　and　past　his　chair　to　the　strains　of　that　waltz。　　He　watched　them　and　the　face　of　her　who　was　playing　turned　smiling　towards　those　little　dancers　thinking：

'Sweetest　picture　I've　seen　for　ages。'

A　voice　said：

〃Hollee！　Mais　enfinquest…ce　que　tu　fais　ladanser；　le　dimanche！　Viens；　donc！〃

But　the　children　came　close　to　old　Jolyon；　knowing　that　he　would　save　them；　and　gazed　into　a　face　which　was　decidedly　'caught　out。'

〃Better　the　day；　better　the　deed；　Mam'zelle。　　It's　all　my　doing。　Trot　along；　chicks；　and　have　your　tea。〃

And；　when　they　were　gone；　followed　by　the　dog　Balthasar；　who　took　every　meal；　he　looked　at　Irene　with　a　twinkle　and　said：

〃Well；　there　we　are！　Aren't　they　sweet？　Have　you　any　little　ones　among　your　pupils？〃

〃Yes；　threetwo　of　them　darlings。〃

〃Pretty？〃

〃Lovely！〃

Old　Jolyon　sighed；　he　had　an　insatiable　appetite　for　the　very　young。　〃My　little　sweet；〃　he　said；　〃is　devoted　to　music；　she'll　be　a　musician　some　day。　　You　wouldn't　give　me　your　opinion　of　her　playing；　I　suppose？〃

〃Of　course　I　will。〃

〃You　wouldn't　like〃　but　he　stifled　the　words　〃to　give　her　lessons。〃　The　idea　that　she　gave　lessons　was　unpleasant　to　him；　yet　it　would　mean　that　he　would　see　her　regularly。　　She　left　the　piano　and　came　over　to　his　chair。

〃I　would　like；　very　much；　but　there　isJune。　　When　are　they　coming　back？〃

Old　Jolyon　frowned。　　〃Not　till　the　middle　of　next　month。　　What　does　that　matter？〃

〃You　said　June　had　forgiven　me；　but　she　could　never　forget；　Uncle　Jolyon。〃

Forget！　She　must　forget；　if　he　wanted　her　to。

But　as　if　answering；　Irene　shook　her　head。　　〃You　know　she　couldn't；　one　doesn't　forget。〃

Always　that　wretched　past！　And　he　said　with　a　sort　of　vexed　finality：

〃Well；　we　shall　see。〃

He　talked　to　her　an　hour　or　more；　of　the　children；　and　a　hundred　little　things；　till　the　carriage　came　round　to　take　her　home。　　And　when　she　had　gone　he　went　back　to　his　chair；　and　sat　there　smoothing　his　face　and　chin；　dreaming　over　the　day。

That　evening　after　dinner　he　went　to　his　study　and　took　a　sheet　of　paper。　　He　stayed　for　some　minutes　without　writing；　then　rose　and　stood　under　the　masterpiece　'Dutch　Fishing　Boats　at　Sunset。'　　He　was　not　thinking　of　that　picture；　but　of　his　life。　　He　was　going　to　leave　her　something　in　his　Will；　nothing　could　so　have　stirred　the　stilly　deeps　of　thought　and　memory。　　He　was　going　to　leave　her　a　portion　of　his　wealth；　of　his　aspirations；　deeds；　qualities；　workall　that　had　made　that　wealth；　going　to　leave　her；　too；　a　part　of　all　he　had　missed　in　life；　by　his　sane　and　steady　pursuit　of　wealth。　　All！　What　had　he　missed？　　'Dutch　Fishing　Boats'　responded　blankly；　he　crossed　to　the　French　window；　and　drawing　the　curtain　aside；　opened　it。　　A　wind　had　got　up；　and　one　of　last　year's　oak　leaves　which　had　somehow　survived　the　gardener's　brooms；　was　dragging　itself　with　a　tiny　clicking　rustle　along　the　stone　terrace　in　the　twilight。　　Except　for　that　it　was　very　quiet　out　there；　and　he　could　smell　the　heliotrope　watered　not　long　since。　　A　bat　went　by。　　A　bird　uttered　its　last　'cheep。'　　And　right　above　the　oak　tree　the　first　star　shone。　　Faust　in　the　opera　had　bartered　his　soul　for　some　fresh　years　of　youth。　Morbid　notion！　　No　such　bargain　was　possible；　that　was　real　tragedy！　No　making　oneself　new　again　for　love　or　life　or　anything。　　Nothing　left　to　do　but　enjoy　beauty　from　afar　off　while　you　could；　and　leave　it　something　in　your　Will。　　But　how　much？　And；　as　if　he　could　not　make　that　calculation　looking　out　into　the　mild　freedom　of　the　country　night；　he　turned　back　and　went　up　to　the　chimney…piece。　There　were　his　pet　bronzesa　Cleopatra　with　the　asp　at　her　breast；　a　Socrates；　a　greyhound　playing　with　her　puppy；　a　strong　man　reining　in　some　horses。　　'They　last！'　he　thought；　and　a　pang　went　through　his　heart。　　They　had　a　thousand　years　of　life　before　them！

'How　much？'　Well！　enough　at　all　events　to　save　her　getting　old　before　her　time；　to　keep　the　lines　out　of　her　face　as　long　as　possible；　and　grey　from　soiling　that　bright　hair。　　He　might　live　another　five　years。　　She　would　be　well　over　thirty　by　then。　　'How　much？'　　She　had　none　of　his　blood　in　her！　　In　loyalty　to　the　tenor　of　his　life　for　forty　years　and　more；　ever　since　he　married　and　founded　that　mysterious　thing；　a　family；　came　this　warning　thoughtNone　of　his　blood；　no　right　to　anything！　　It　was　a　luxury　then；　this　notion。　　An　extravagance；　a　petting　of　an　old　man's　whim；　one　of　those　things　done　in　dotage。　　His　real　future　was　vested　in　those　who　had　his　blood；　in　whom　he　would　live　on　when　he　was　gone。　　He　turned　away　from　the　bronzes　and　stood　looking　at　the　old　leather　chair　in　which　he　had　sat　and　smoked　so　many　hundreds　of　cigars。　　And　suddenly　he　seemed　to　see　her　sitting　there　in　her　grey　dress；　fragrant；　soft；　dark…eyed；　graceful；　looking　up　at　him。　　Why！　She　cared　nothing　for　him；　really；　all　she　cared　for　was　that　lost　lover　of　hers。　　But　she　was　there；　whether　she　would　or　no；　giving　him　pleasure　with　her　beauty　and　grace。　　One　had　no　right　to　inflict　an　old　man's　company；　no　right　to　ask　her　down　to　play　to　him　and　let　him　look　at　herfor　no　reward！　　Pleasure　must　be　paid　for　in　this　world。　　'How　much？'　After　all；　there　was　plenty；　his　son　and　his　three　grandchildren　would　never　miss　that　little　lump。　　He　had　made　it　himself；　nearly　every　penny；　he　could　leave　it　where　he　liked；　allow　himself　this　little　pleasure。　　He　went　back　to　the　bureau。　　'Well；　I'm　going　to；'　he　thought；　'let　them　think　what　they　like。　　I'm　going　to！'　　And　he　sat　down。

'How　much？'　Ten　thousand；　twenty　thousandhow　much？　If　only　with　his　money　he　could　buy　one　year；　one　month　of　youth。　　And　startled　by