01-the kreutzer sonata-第9节

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inasmuch　as　I　did　not　allow　myself　to　be　seduced　by　other　women

that　I　was　leading　an　honest　family　life；　that　I　was　a　very

mortal　being；　and　that　if　we　　had　quarrels；　the　fault　was　in　my

wife；　and　in　her　character。



〃But　it　is　evident　that　the　fault　was　not　in　her。　　She　was　like

everybody　else；　like　the　majority。　　She　was　brought　up　according

to　the　principles　exacted　by　the　situation　of　our　society；that

is；　as　all　the　young　girls　of　our　wealthy　classes；　without

exception；　are　brought　up；　and　as　they　cannot　fail　to　be　brought

up。　　How　many　times　we　hear　or　read　of　reflections　upon　the

abnormal　condition　of　women；　and　upon　what　they　ought　to　be。　　But

these　are　only　vain　words。　　The　education　of　women　results　from

the　real　and　not　imaginary　view　which　the　world　entertains　of

women's　vocation。　　According　to　this　view；　the　condition　of　women

consists　in　procuring　pleasure　and　it　is　to　that　end　that　her

education　is　directed。　　From　her　infancy　she　is　taught　only　those

things　that　are　calculated　to　increase　her　charm。　　Every　young

girl　is　accustomed　to　think　only　of　that。



〃As　the　serfs　were　brought　up　solely　to　please　their　masters；　so

woman　is　brought　up　to　attract　men。　　It　cannot　be　otherwise。　　But

you　will　say；　perhaps；　that　that　applies　only　to　young　girls　who

are　badly　brought　up；　but　that　there　is　another　education；　an

education　that　is　serious；　in　the　schools；　an　education　in　the

dead　languages；　an　education　in　the　institutions　of　midwifery；　an

education　in　medical　courses；　and　in　other　courses。　　It　is

false。



〃Every　sort　of　feminine　education　has　for　its　sole　object　the

attraction　of　men。



〃Some　attract　by　music　or　curly　hair；　others　by　science　or　by

civic　virtue。　　The　object　is　the　same；　and　cannot　be　otherwise

（since　no　other　object　exists）；to　seduce　man　in　order　to

possess　him。　　Imagine　courses　of　instruction　for　women　and

feminine　science　without　men；that　is；　learned　women；　and　men

not　KNOWING　them　as　learned。　　Oh；　no！　　No　education；　no

instruction　can　change　woman　as　long　as　her　highest　ideal　shall

be　marriage　and　not　virginity；　freedom　from　sensuality。　　Until

that　time　she　will　remain　a　serf。　　One　need　only　imagine；

forgetting　the　universality　of　the　case；　the　conditions　in　which

our　young　girls　are　brought　up；　to　avoid　astonishment　at　the

debauchery　of　the　women　of　our　upper　classes。　　It　is　the　opposite

that　would　cause　astonishment。



〃Follow　my　reasoning。　　From　infancy　garments；　ornaments；

cleanliness；　grace；　dances；　music；　reading　of　poetry；　novels；

singing；　the　theatre；　the　concert；　for　use　within　and　without；

according　as　women　listen；　or　practice　themselves。　　With　that；

complete　physical　idleness；　an　excessive　care　of　the　body；　a　vast

consumption　of　sweetmeats；　and　God　knows　how　the　poor　maidens

suffer　from　their　own　sensuality；　excited　by　all　these　things。　

Nine　out　of　ten　are　tortured　intolerably　during　the　first　period

of　maturity；　and　afterward　provided　they　do　not　marry　at　the　age

of　twenty。　　That　is　what　we　are　unwilling　to　see；　but　those　who

have　eyes　see　it　all　the　same。　　And　even　the　majority　of　these

unfortunate　creatures　are　so　excited　by　a　hidden　sensuality　（and

it　is　lucky　if　it　is　hidden）　that　they　are　fit　for　nothing。　　They

become　animated　only　in　the　presence　of　men。　　Their　whole　life　is

spent　in　preparations　for　coquetry；　or　in　coquetry　itself。　　In

the　presence　of　men　they　become　too　animated；　they　begin　to　live

by　sensual　energy。　　But　the　moment　the　man　goes　away；　the　life

stops。



〃And　that；　not　in　the　presence　of　a　certain　man；　but　in　the

presence　of　any　man；　provided　he　is　not　utterly　hideous。　　You

will　say　that　this　is　an　exception。　　No；　it　is　a　rule。　　Only　in

some　it　is　made　very　evident；　in　other　less　so。　　But　no　one　lives

by　her　own　life；　they　are　all　dependent　upon　man。　　They　cannot　be

otherwise；　since　to　them　the　attraction　of　the　greatest　number　of

men　is　the　ideal　of　life　（young　girls　and　married　women）；　and　it

is　for　this　reason　that　they　have　no　feeling　stronger　than　that

of　the　animal　need　of　every　female　who　tries　to　attract　the

largest　number　of　males　in　order　to　increase　the　opportunities

for　choice。　　So　it　is　in　the　life　of　young　girls；　and　so　it

continues　during　marriage。　　In　the　life　of　young　girls　it　is

necessary　in　order　to　selection；　and　in　marriage　it　is　necessary

in　order　to　rule　the　husband。　　Only　one　thing　suppresses　or

interrupts　these　tendencies　for　a　time；namely；　children；and

then　only　when　the　woman　is　not　a　monster；that　is；　when　she

nurses　her　own　children。　　Here　again　the　doctor　interferes。



〃With　my　wife；　who　desired　to　nurse　her　own　children；　and　who　did

nurse　six　of　them；　it　happened　that　the　first　child　was　sickly。　

The　doctors；　who　cynically　undressed　her　and　felt　of　her

everywhere；　and　whom　I　had　to　thank　and　pay　for　these

acts；these　dear　doctors　decided　that　she　ought　not　to　nurse　her

child；　and　she　was　temporarily　deprived　of　the　only　remedy　for

coquetry。　　A　nurse　finished　the　nursing　of　this　first…born；that

is　to　say；　we　profited　by　the　poverty　and　ignorance　of　a　woman　to

steal　her　from　her　own　little　one　in　favor　of　ours；　and　for　that

purpose　we　dressed　her　in　a　kakoschnik　　trimmed　with　gold　lace。　

Nevertheless；　that　is　not　the　question；　but　there　was　again

awakened　in　my　wife　that　coquetry　which　had　been　sleeping　during


the　nursing　period。　　Thanks　to　that；　she　reawakened　in　me　the

torments　of　jealousy　which　I　had　formerly　known；　though　in　a　much

slighter　degree。



　　

CHAPTER　XV。



〃Yes；　jealousy；　that　is　another　of　the　secrets　of　marriage　known

to　all　and　concealed　by　all。　　Besides　the　general　cause　of　the

mutual　hatred　of　husbands　and　wives　resulting　from　complicity　in

the　pollution　of　a　human　being；　and　also　from　other　causes；　the

inexhaustible　source　of　marital　wounds　is　jealousy。　　But　by　tacit

consent　it　is　determined　to　conceal　them　from　all；　and　we　conceal

them。　　Knowing　them；　each　one　supposes　in　himself　that　it　is　an

unfortunate　peculiarity；　and　not　a　common　destiny。　　So　it　was

with　me；　and　it　had　to　be　so。　　There　cannot　fail　to　be　jealousy

between　husbands　and　wives　who　live　immorally。　　If　they　cannot

sacrifice　their　pleasures　for　the　welfare　of　their　child；　they

conclude　therefrom；　and　truly；　that　they　will　not　sacrifice　their

pleasures　for；　I　will　not　say　happiness　and　tranquillity　（since

one　may　sin　in　secret）；　but　even　for　the　sake　of　conscience。　Each

one　knows　very　well　that　neither　admits　any　high　moral　reasons

for　not　betraying　the　other；　since　in　their　mutual　relations　they

fail　in　the　requirements　of　morality；　and　from　that　time　distrust

and　watch　each　other。



〃Oh；　what　a　frightful　feeling　of　jealousy！　　I　do　not　speak　of

that　real　jealousy　which　has　foundations　（it　is　tormenting；　but

it　promises　an　issue）；　but　of　that　unconscious　jealousy　which

inevitably　accompanies　every　immoral　marriage；　and　which；　having

no　cause；　has　no　end。　　This　jealousy　is　frightful。　　Frightful；

that　is　the　word。



〃And　this　is　it。　　A　young　man　speaks　to　my　wife。　　He　looks　at　her

with　a　smile；　and；　as　it　seems　to　me；　he　surveys　her　body。　　How

does　he　dare　to　think　of　her；　to　think　of　the　possibility　of　a

romance　with　her？　　And　how　can　she；　seeing　this；　tolerate　him？　

Not　only　does　she　tolerate　him；　but　she　seems　pleased。　　I　even

see　that　she　puts　herself　to　trouble　on　his　account。　　And　in　my

soul　there　rises　such　a　hatred　for　her　that　each　of　her　words；

each　gesture；　disgusts　me。　　She　notices　it；　she　knows　not　what　to

do；　and　how　assume　an　air　of　indifferent　animation？　　Ah！　　I

suffer！　　That　makes　her　gay；　she　is　content。　　And　my　hatred

increases　tenfold；　but　I　do　not　dare　to　give　it　free　force；

because　at　the　bottom　of　my　soul　I　know　that　there　are　no　real

reasons　for　it；　and　I　remain　in　my　seat；　feigning　indifference；

and　exaggerating　my　attention　and　courtesy　to　HIM。



〃Then　I　get　angry　with　myself。　　I　desire　to　leave　the　room；　to

leave　them　alone；　and　I　do；　in　fact；　go　out；　but　scarcely　am　I

outside　when　I　am　invaded　by　a　fear　of　what　is　taking　place

within　my　absence。　　I　go　in　again；　inventing　some　pretext。　　Or

sometimes　I　do　not　go　in；　I　remain　near　the　door；　and　listen。　

How　can　she　humiliate　herself　and　humiliate　me　by　placing　me　in

this　cowardly　situation　of　suspicion　and　espionage？　　Oh；

abomination！　　Oh；　the　wicked　animal！　　And　he　too；　what　does　he

think　of　you？　　But　he　is　like　all　men。　　He　is　what　I　was　before

my　marriage。　　It　gives　him　pleasure。　　He　even　smiles　when　he

looks　at　me；　as　much　as　to　say：　'What　have　you　to　do　with　this？　

It　is　my　turn　now。'



〃This　feeling　is　horrible。　　Its　burn　is　unendurable。　　To

entertain　this　feeling　toward　any　one；　to　once　suspect　a　man　of

lusting　after　my　wife；　was　enough　to　spoil　this　man　forever　in　my

eyes；　as　if　he　had　been　sprinkled　with　vitriol。　Let　me　once

become　jealous　of　a　being；　and　nevermore　could　I　re…establish

with　him　simple　human　relation