the crime of sylvestre bonnard-第4节

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t；　but　I　can　affirm　that　whenever　my　Uncle　Victor　found　himself　in　any　assembly　of　twenty　persons；　it　was　impossible　to　see　or　to　hear　anybody　but　him。　　My　excellent　father；　I　have　reason　to　believe；　never　shared　my　admiration　for　Uncle　Victor；　who　used　to　sicken　him　with　his　pipe；　give　him　great　thumps　in　the　back　by　way　of　friendliness；　and　accuse　him　of　lacking　energy。　　My　mother；　though　always　showing　a　sister's　indulgence　to　the　Captain；　sometimes　advised　him　to　fold　the　brandy…　bottle　a　little　less　frequently。　　But　I　had　no　part　either　in　these　repugnances　or　these　reproaches；　and　Uncle　Victor　inspired　me　with　the　purest　enthusiasm。　　It　was　therefore　with　a　feeling　of　pride　that　I　entered　into　the　little　lodging　he　occupied　in　the　Rue　Guenegaud。　The　entire　lunch；　served　on　a　small　table　close　to　the　fireplace；　consisted　of　cold　meats　and　confectionery。

The　Captain　stuffed　me　with　cakes　and　undiluted　wine。　　He　told　me　of　numberless　injustices　to　which　he　had　been　a　victim。　　He　complained　particularly　of　the　Bourbons；　and　as　he　neglected　to　tell　me　who　the　Bourbons　were；　I　got　the　ideaI　can't　tell　howthat　the　Bourbons　were　horse…dealers　established　at　Waterloo。　　The　Captain；　who　never　interrupted　his　talk　except　for　the　purpose　of　pouring　out　wine；　furthermore　made　charges　against　a　number　of　dirty　scoundrels；　blackguards；　and　good…for…nothings　whom　I　did　not　know　anything　about；　but　whom　I　hated　from　the　bottom　of　my　heart。　　At　dessert　I　thought　I　heard　the　Captain　say　my　father　was　a　man　who　could　be　led　anywhere　by　the　nose；　but　I　am　not　quite　sure　that　I　understood　him。　　I　had　a　buzzing　in　my　ears；　and　it　seemed　to　me　that　the　table　was　dancing。

My　uncle　put　on　his　frogged　coat；　took　his　bell　shaped　hat；　and　we　descended　to　the　street；　which　seemed　to　me　singularly　changed。　　It　looked　to　me　as　if　I　had　not　been　in　it　before　for　ever　so　long　a　time。　　Nevertheless；　when　we　came　to　the　Rue　de　Seine；　the　idea　of　my　doll　suddenly　returned　to　my　mind　and　excited　me　in　an　extraordinary　way。　　My　head　was　on　fire。　　I　resolved　upon　a　desperate　expedient。　　We　were　passing　before　the　window。　　She　was　there；　behind　the　glasswith　her　red　checks；　and　her　flowered　petticoat；　and　her　long　legs。

〃Uncle；〃　I　said；　with　a　great　effort；　〃will　you　buy　that　doll　for　me？〃

And　I　waited。

〃Buy　a　doll　for　a　boysacrebleu！〃　cried　my　uncle；　in　a　voice　of　thunder。　　〃Do　you　wish　to　dishonour　yourself？　　And　it　is　that　old　Mag　there　that　you　want！　　Well；　I　must　compliment　you；　my　young　fellow！　　If　you　grow　up　with　such　tastes　as　that；　you　will　never　have　any　pleasure　in　life；　and　your　comrades　will　call　you　a　precious　ninny。　　If　you　asked　me　for　a　sword　or　a　gun；　my　boy；　I　would　buy　them　for　you　with　the　last　silver　crown　of　my　pension。　　But　to　buy　a　doll　for　youby　all　that's　holy！to　disgrace　you！　　Never　in　the　world！　　Why；　if　I　were　ever　to　see　you　playing　with　a　puppet　rigged　out　like　that；　Monsieur；　my　sister's　son；　I　would　disown　you　for　my　nephew！〃

On　hearing　these　words；　I　felt　my　heart　so　wrung　that　nothing　but　pridea　diabolical　pridekept　me　from　crying。

My　uncle；　suddenly　calming　down；　returned　to　his　ideas　about　the　Bourbons；　but　I；　still　smarting　under　the　weight　of　his　indignation；　felt　an　unspeakable　shame。　　My　resolve　was　quickly　made。　　I　promised　myself　never　to　disgrace　myselfI　firmly　and　for　ever　renounced　that　red…cheeked　doll。

I　felt　that　day；　for　the　first　time；　the　austere　sweetness　of　sacrifice。

Captain；　though　it　be　true　that　all　your　life　you　swore　like　a　pagan；　smoked　like　a　beadle；　and　drank　like　a　bell…ringer；　be　your　memory　nevertheless　honourednot　merely　because　you　were　a　brave　soldier；　but　also　because　you　revealed　to　your　little　nephew　in　petticoats　the　sentiment　of　heroism！　　Pride　and　laziness　had　made　you　almost　insupportable；　Uncle　Victor！but　a　great　heart　used　to　beat　under　those　frogs　upon　your　coat。　　You　always　used　to　wear；　I　now　remember；　a　rose　in　your　button…hole。　　That　rose　which　you　offered　so　readily　to　the　shop…girlsthat　large；　open…hearted　flower；　scattering　its　petals　to　all　the　winds；　was　the　symbol　of　your　glorious　youth。　You　despised　neither　wine　nor　tobacco；　but　you　despised　life。　　Neither　delicacy　nor　common　sense　could　have　been　learned　from　you；　Captain；　but　you　taught　me；　even　at　an　age　when　my　nurse　had　to　wipe　my　nose；　a　lesson　of　honour　and　self…abrogation　that　I　shall　never　forget。

You　have　now　been　sleeping　for　many　years　in　the　Cemetery　of　Mont…　Parnasse；　under　a　plain　slab　bearing　the　epitaph：

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　CI…GIT　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　ARISTIDE　VICTOR　MALDENT；　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　Capitaine　d'Infanterie；　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　Chevalier　de　la　Legion　d'Honneur。

But　such；　Captain；　was　not　the　inscription　devised　by　yourself　to　be　placed　above　those　old　bones　of　yoursknocked　about　so　long　on　fields　of　battle　and　in　haunts　of　pleasure。　　Among　your　papers　was　found　this　proud　and　bitter　epitaph；　which；　despite　your　last　will　none　could　have　ventured　to　put　upon　your　tomb：

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　CI…GIT　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　UN　BRIGAND　DE　LA　LOIRE

〃Therese；　we　will　get　a　wreath　of　immortelles　to…morrow；　and　lay　them　on　the　tomb　of　the　Brigand　of　the　Loire。〃　。。。

But　Therese　is　not　here。　　And　how；　indeed；　could　she　be　near　me；　seeing　that　I　am　at　the　rondpoint　of　the　Champs…Elysees？　　There；　at　the　termination　of　the　avenue；　the　Arc　de　Triomphe；　which　bears　under　its　vaults　the　names　of　Uncle　Victor's　companions…in…arms；　opens　its　giant　gate　against　the　sky。　　The　trees　of　the　avenue　are　unfolding　to　the　sun　of　spring　their　first　leaves；　still　all　pale　and　chilly。　　Beside　me　the　carriages　keep　rolling　by　to　the　Bois　de　Boulogne。　　Unconsciously　I　have　wandered　into　this　fashionable　avenue　on　my　promenade；　and　halted；　quite　stupidly；　in　front　of　a　booth　stocked　with　gingerbread　and　decanters　of　liquorice…water；　each　topped　by　a　lemon。　　A　miserable　little　boy；　covered　with　rags；　which　expose　his　chapped　skin；　stares　with　widely　opened　eyes　at　those　sumptuous　sweets　which　are　not　for　such　as　he。　　With　the　shamelessness　of　innocence　he　betrays　his　longing。　　His　round；　fixed　eyes　contemplate　a　certain　gingerbread　man　of　lofty　stature。　　It　is　a　general；　and　it　looks　a　little　like　Uncle　Victor。　　I　take　it；　I　pay　for　it；　and　present　it　to　the　little　pauper；　who　dares　not　extend　his　hand　to　receive　itfor；　by　reason　of　precocious　experience；　he　cannot　believe　in　luck；　he　looks　at　me；　in　the　same　way　that　certain　big　dogs　do；　with　the　air　of　one　saying；　〃You　are　cruel　to　make　fun　of　me　like　that！〃

〃Come；　little　stupid；〃　I　say　to　him；　in　that　rough　tone　I　am　accustomed　to　use；　〃take　ittake　it；　and　eat　it；　for　you；　happier　than　I　was　at　your　age；　you　can　satisfy　your　tastes　without　disgracing　yourself。〃。。。And　you；　Uncle　Victoryou；　whose　manly　figure　has　been　recalled　to　me　by　that　gingerbread　general；　come；　glorious　Shadow；　help　me　to　forget　my　new　doll。　　We　remain　for　ever　children；　and　are　always　running　after　new　toys。




Same　day。


In　the　oddest　way　that　Coccoz　family　has　become　associated　in　my　mind　with　the　Clerk　Alexander。

〃Therese；〃　I　said；　as　I　threw　myself　into　my　easy…chair；　〃tell　me　if　the　little　Coccoz　is　well；　and　whether　he　has　got　his　first　teeth　yetand　bring　me　my　slippers。〃

〃He　ought　to　have　them　by　this　time；　Monsieur；〃　replied　Therese；　〃but　I　never　saw　them。　　The　very　first　fine　day　of　spring　the　mother　disappeared　with　the　child；　leaving　furniture　and　clothes　and　everything　behind　her。　　They　found　thirty…eight　empty　pomade…pots　in　the　attic。　　It　passes　all　belief！　　She　had　visitors　latterly；　and　you　may　be　quite　sure　she　is　not　now　in　a　convent　of　nuns。　　The　niece　of　the　concierge　says　she　saw　her　driving　about　in　a　carriage　on　the　boulevards。　　I　always　told　you　she　would　end　badly。〃

〃Therese；〃　I　replied；　〃that　young　woman　has　not　ended　either　badly　or　well　as　yet。　　Wait　until　the　term　of　her　life　is　over　before　you　judge　her。　　And　be　careful　not　to　talk　too　much　with　that　concierge。　It　seemed　to　methough　I　only　saw　her　for　a　moment　on　the　stairs　that　Madame　Coccoz　was　very　fond　of　her　child。　　For　that　mother's　love　at　least；　she　deserves　credit。〃

〃As　far　as　that　goes；　Monsieur；　certainly　the　little　one　never　wanted　for　anything。　　In　all　the　Quarter　one　could　not　have　found　a　child　better　kept；　or　better　nourished；　or　more　petted　and　coddled。　　Every　day　that　God　makes　she　puts　a　clean　bib　on　him；　and　sings　to　him　to　make　him　laugh　from　morning　till　night。〃

〃Therese；　a　poet　has　said；　'That　child　whose　mother　has　never　smiled　upon　him　is　worthy　neither　of　the　table　of　the　gods　nor　of　the　couch　of　the　goddesses。'〃



July　8；　1852。


Having　been　informed　that　the　Chapel　of　the　Virgin　at　Saint…Germain…　des…Pres　was　being　repaved；　I　entered　the　church　with　the　hope　of　discovering　some　old　inscriptions；　possibly　exposed　by　the　labours　of　the　workmen。　　I　was　not　disappointed。　　The　architect　kindly　showed　me　a　stone　which　he　had　just　had　raised　up　against　the　wall。　I　knelt　down　to　look　at　the　inscription　engraved　upon　that　stone；　and　then；　half　aloud；　I　read　in　the　shadow　of　the　old　apsis　these　words；　which　made　my　heart　leap：

〃Cy…gist　Alexandre；　moyne　de　ceste　eglise；　qui　fist　mettre　en　argent　le　menton　de　Saint…Vincent　et　de　Saint…