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第28节

a personal record-第28节

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Service in an altogether green state。  It was no use telling him



that my mysterious vocation was so strong that my very wild oats



had to be sown at sea。  It was the exact truth; but he would not



have understood the somewhat exceptional psychology of my



sea…going; I fear。







〃I suppose you've never come across one of your countrymen at



sea。  Have you; now?〃







I admitted I never had。  The examiner had given himself up to the



spirit of gossiping idleness。  For myself; I was in no haste to



leave that room。  Not in the least。  The era of examinations was



over。  I would never again see that friendly man who was a



professional ancestor; a sort of grandfather in the craft。 



Moreover; I had to wait till he dismissed me; and of that there



was no sign。 As he remained silent; looking at me; I added:







〃But I have heard of one; some years ago。  He seems to have been



a boy serving his time on board a Liverpool ship; if I am not



mistaken。〃







〃What was his name?〃







I told him。







〃How did you say that?〃 he asked; puckering up his eyes at the



uncouth sound。







I repeated the name very distinctly。







〃How do you spell it?〃







I told him。  He moved his head at the impracticable nature of



that name; and observed:







〃It's quite as long as your ownisn't it?〃







There was no hurry。  I had passed for master; and I had all the



rest of my life before me to make the best of it。  That seemed a



long time。  I went leisurely through a small mental calculation;



and said:







〃Not quite。  Shorter by two letters; sir。〃







〃Is it?〃  The examiner pushed the signed blue slip across the



table to me; and rose from his chair。  Somehow this seemed a very



abrupt ending of our relations; and I felt almost sorry to part



from that excellent man; who was master of a ship before the



whisper of the sea had reached my cradle。  He offered me his hand



and wished me well。  He even made a few steps toward the door



with me; and ended with good…natured advice。







〃I don't know what may be your plans; but you ought to go into



steam。  When a man has got his master's certificate it's the



proper time。  If I were you I would go into steam。〃







I thanked him; and shut the door behind me definitely on the era



of examinations。  But that time I did not walk on air; as on the



first two occasions。  I walked across the hill of many beheadings



with measured steps。 It was a fact; I said to myself; that I was



now a British master mariner beyond a doubt。  It was not that I



had an exaggerated sense of that very modest achievement; with



which; however; luck; opportunity; or any extraneous influence



could have had nothing to do。  That fact; satisfactory and



obscure in itself; had for me a certain ideal significance。  It



was an answer to certain outspoken scepticism and even to some



not very kind aspersions。  I had vindicated myself from what had



been cried upon as a stupid obstinacy or a fantastic caprice。  I



don't mean to say that a whole country had been convulsed by my



desire to go to sea。  But for a boy between fifteen and sixteen;



sensitive enough; in all conscience; the commotion of his little



world had seemed a very considerable thing indeed。  So



considerable that; absurdly enough; the echoes of it linger to



this day。  I catch myself in hours of solitude and retrospect



meeting arguments and charges made thirty…five years ago by



voices now forever still; finding things to say that an assailed



boy could not have found; simply because of the mysteriousness of



his impulses to himself。 I understood no more than the people who



called upon me to explain myself。  There was no precedent。  I



verily believe mine was the only case of a boy of my nationality



and antecedents taking a; so to speak; standing jump out of his



racial surroundings and associations。  For you must understand



that there was no idea of any sort of 〃career〃 in my call。  Of



Russia or Germany there could be no question。  The nationality;



the antecedents; made it impossible。  The feeling against the



Austrian service was not so strong; and I dare say there would



have been no difficulty in finding my way into the Naval School



at Pola。  It would have meant six months' extra grinding at



German; perhaps; but I was not past the age of admission; and in



other respects I was well qualified。  This expedient to palliate



my folly was thought ofbut not by me。  I must admit that in



that respect my negative was accepted at once。  That order of



feeling was comprehensible enough to the most inimical of my



critics。  I was not called upon to offer explanations; but the



truth is that what I had in view was not a naval career; but the



sea。  There seemed no way open to it but through France。  I had



the language; at any rate; and of all the countries in Europe it



is with France that Poland has most connection。  There were some



facilities for having me a little looked after; at first。 



Letters were being written; answers were being received;



arrangements were being made for my departure for Marseilles;



where an excellent fellow called Solary; got at in a round about



fashion through various French channels; had promised



good…naturedly to put le jeune homme in the way of getting a



decent ship for his first start if he really wanted a taste of ce



metier de chien。







I watched all these preparations gratefully; and kept my own



counsel。  But what I told the last of my examiners was perfectly



true。  Already the determined resolve that 〃if a seaman; then an



English seaman〃 was formulated in my head; though; of course; in



the Polish language。  I did not know six words of English; and I



was astute enough to understand that it was much better to say



nothing of my purpose。  As it was I was already looked upon as



partly insane; at least by the more distant acquaintances。 The



principal thing was to get away。  I put my trust in the



good…natured Solary's very civil letter to my uncle; though I was



shocked a little by the phrase about the metier de chien。







This Solary (Baptistin); when I beheld him in the flesh; turned



out a quite young man; very good…looking; with a fine black;



short beard; a fresh complexion; and soft; merry black eyes。  He



was as jovial and good natured as any boy could desire。  I was



still asleep in my room in a modest hotel near the quays of the



old port; after the fatigues of the journey via Vienna; Zurich;



Lyons; when he burst in; flinging the shutters open to the sun of



Provence and chiding me boisterously for lying abed。  How



pleasantly he startled me by his noisy objurgations to be up and



off instantly for a 〃three years' campaign in the South Seas!〃  O



magic words!  〃Une campagne de trois ans dans les mers du



sud〃that is the French for a three years' deep…water voyage。







He gave me a delightful waking; and his friendliness was



unwearied; but I fear he did not enter upon the quest for a ship



for me in a very solemn spirit。  He had been at sea himself; but



had left off at the age of twenty…five; finding he could earn his



living on shore in a much more agreeable manner。  He was related



to an incredible number of Marseilles well…to…do families of a



certain class。  One of his uncles was a ship…broker of good



standing; with a large connection among English ships; other



relatives of his dealt in ships' stores; owned sail…lofts; sold



chains and anchors; were master…stevedores; calkers; shipwrights。







His grandfather (I think) was a dignitary of a kind; the Syndic



of the Pilots。  I made acquaintances among these people; but



mainly among the pilots。  The very first whole day I ever spent



on salt water was by invitation; in a big half…decked pilot…boat;



cruising under close reefs on the lookout; in misty; blowing



weather; for the sails of ships and the smoke of steamers rising



out there; beyond the slim and tall Planier lighthouse cutting



the line of the wind…swept horizon with a white perpendicular



stroke。  They were hospitable souls; these sturdy Provencal



seamen。  Under the general designation of le petit ami de



Baptistin I was made the guest of the corporation of pilots; and



had the freedom of their boats night or day。  And many a day and



a night; too; did I spend cruising with these rough; kindly men;



under whose auspices my intimacy with the sea began。  Many a time



〃the little friend of Baptistin〃 had the hooded clo

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