mary stuart-第10节

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〃I　have　worked　till　two　o'clock　at　the　bracelet；　I　have　enclosed　a

little　key　which　is　attached　by　two　strings：　it　is　not　as　well　worked

as　I　should　like；　but　I　have　not　had　time　to　make　it　better；　I　will

make　you　a　finer　one　on　the　first　occasion。　　Take　care　that　it　is　not

seen　on　you；　for　I　have　worked　at　it　before　everyone；　and　it　would　be

recognised　to　a　certainty。



〃I　always　return；　in　spite　of　myself；　to　the　frightful　attempt　that

you　advise。　　You　compel　me　to　concealments；　and　above　all　to

treacheries　that　make　me　shudder；　I　would　rather　die；　believe　me；

than　do　such　things；　for　it　makes　my　heart　bleed。　　He　does　not　want

to　follow　me　unless　I　promise　him　to　have　the　selfsame　bed　and　board

with　him　as　before；　and　not　to　abandon　him　so　often。　　If　I　consent　to

it；　he　says　he　will　do　all　I　wish；　and　will　follow　me　everywhere；　but

he　has　begged　me　to　put　off　my　departure　for　two　days。　　I　have

pretended　to　agree　to　all　he　wishes；　but　I　have　told　him　not　to　speak

of　our　reconciliation　to　anyone；　for　fear　it　should　make　some　lords

uneasy。　　At　last　I　shall　take　him　everywhere　I　wish。。。。　　Alas！　I　have

never　deceived　anyone；　but　what　would　I　not　do　to　please　you？

Command；　and　whatever　happens；　I　shall　obey。　　But　see　yourself　if　one

could　not　contrive　some　secret　means　in　the　shape　of　a　remedy。　　He

must　purge　himself　at　Craigmiller　and　take　baths　there；　he　will　be

some　days　without　going　out。　　So　far　as　I　can　see；　he　is　very　uneasy；

but　he　has　great　trust　in　what　I　tell　him：　however；　his　confidence

does　not　go　so　far　as　to　allow　him　to　open　his　mind　to　me。　　If　you

like；　I　will　tell　him　every　thing：　I　can　have　no　pleasure　in

deceiving　someone　who　is　trusting。　　However；　it　will　be　just　as　you

wish：　do　not　esteem　me　the　less　for　that。　　It　is　you　advised　it；

never　would　vengeance　have　taken　me　so　far。　　Sometimes　he　attacks　me

in　a　very　sensitive　place；　and　he　touches　me　to　the　quick　when　he

tells　me　that　his　crimes　are　known；　but　that　every　day　greater　ones

are　committed　that　one　uselessly　attempts　to　hide；　since　all　crimes；

whatsoever　they　be；　great　or　small；　come　to　men's　knowledge　and　form

the　common　subject　of　their　discourse。　　He　adds　sometimes；　in

speaking　to　me　of　Madame　de　Rere；　'I　wish　her　services　may　do　you

honour。'　　He　has　assured　me　that　many　people　thought；　and　that　he

thought　himself；　that　I　was　not　my　own　mistress；　this　is　doubtless

because　I　had　rejected　the　conditions　he　offered　me。　　Finally；　it　is

certain　that　he　is　very　uneasy　about　you　know　what；　and　that　he　even

suspects　that　his　life　is　aimed　at。　　He　is　in　despair　whenever　the

conversation　turns　on　you；　Livingston；　and　my　brother。　　However；　he

says　neither　good　nor　ill　of　absent　people；　but；　on　the　contrary；　he

always　avoids　speaking　of　them。　　His　father　keeps　to　the　house：　I

have　not　seen　him　yet。　　A　number　of　the　Hamiltons　are　here；　and

accompany　me　everywhere；　all　the　friends　of　the　other　one　follow　me

each　time　I　go　to　see　him。　　He　has　begged　me　to　be　at　his　rising　to…

morrow。　　My　messenger　will　tell　you　the　rest。



〃Burn　my　letter：　there　would　be　danger　in　keeping　it。　　Besides；　it　is

hardly　worth　the　trouble；　being　filled　only　with　dark　thoughts。



〃As　for　you；　do　not　be　offended　if　I　am　sad　and　uneasy　to…day；　that

to　please　you　I　rise　above　honour；　remorse；　and　dangers。　　Do　not　take

in　bad　part　what　I　tell　you；　and　do　not　listen　to　the　malicious

explanations　of　your　wife's　brother；　he　is　a　knave　whom　you　ought　not

to　hear　to　the　prejudice　of　the　most　tender　and　most　faithful

mistress　that　ever　was。　　Above　all；　do　not　allow　yourself　to　be　moved

by　that　woman：　her　sham　tears　are　nothing　in　comparison　with　the　real

tears　that　I　shed；　and　with　what　love　and　constancy　make　me　suffer　at

succeeding　her；　it　is　for　that　alone　that　in　spite　of　myself　I　betray

all　those　who　could　cross　my　love。　　God　have　mercy　on　me；　and　send

you　all　the　prosperity　that　a　humble　and　tender　friend　who　awaits

from　you　soon　another　reward　wishes　you。　　It　is　very　late；　but　it　is

always　with　regret　that　I　lay　down　my　pen　when　I　write　to　you；

however；　I　shall　not　end　my　letter　until　I　shall　have　kissed　your

hands。　　Forgive　me　that　it　is　so　ill…written：　perhaps　I　do　so

expressly　that　you　may　be　obliged　to　re…read　it　several　times：　I　have

transcribed　hastily　what　I　had　written　down　on　my　tablets；　and　my

paper　has　given　out。　　Remember　a　tender　friend；　and　write　to　her

often：　love　me　as　tenderly　as　I　love　you；　and　remember



　　　　　Madame　de　Rere's　words；

　　　　　The　English；

　　　　　His　mother；

　　　　　The　Earl　of　Argyll；

　　　　　The　Earl　of　Bothwell；

　　　　　The　Edinburgh　dwelling。〃





SECOND　LETTER



〃It　seems　that　you　have　forgotten　me　during　your　absence；　so　much　the

more　that　you　had　promised　me；　at　setting　out；　to　let　me　know　in

detail　everything　fresh　that　should　happen。　　The　hope　of　receiving

your　news　was　giving　me　almost　as　much　delight　as　your　return　could

have　brought　me：　you　have　put　it　off　longer　than　you　promised　me。　　As

for　me；　although　you　do　not　write；　I　play　my　part　always。　　I　shall

take　him　to　Craigmiller　on　Monday；　and　he　will　spend　the　whole　of

Wednesday　there。　　On　that　day　I　shall　go　to　Edinburgh　to　be　bled

there；　unless　you　arrange　otherwise　at　least。　　He　is　more　cheerful

than　usual；　and　he　is　better　than　ever。



He　says　everything　he　can　to　persuade　me　that　he　loves　me；　he　has　a

thousand　attentions　for　me；　and　he　anticipates　me　in　everything：　all

that　is　so　pleasant　for　me；　that　I　never　go　to　him　but　the　pain　in　my

side　comes　on　again；　his　company　weighs　on　me　so　much。　　If　Paris

brought　me　what　I　asked　him；　I　should　be　soon　cured。　　If　you　have　not

yet　returned　when　I　go　you　know　where；　write　to　me；　I　beg　you；　and

tell　me　what　you　wish　me　to　do；　for　if　you　do　not　manage　things

prudently；　I　foresee　that　the　whole　burden　will　fall　on　me：　look　into

everything　and　weigh　the　affair　maturely。　　I　send　you　my　letter　by

Beaton；　who　will　set　out　the　day　which　has　been　assigned　to　Balfour。

It　only　remains　for　me　to　beg　you　to　inform　me　of　your　journey。



〃Glasgow；　this　Saturday　morning。〃





THIRD　LETTER



〃I　stayed　you　know　where　longer　than　I　should　have　done；　if　it　had

not　been　to　get　from　him　something　that　the　bearer　of　these　presents

will　tell　you　it　was　a　good　opportunity　for　covering　up　our　designs：

I　have　promised　him　to　bring　the　person　you　know　to…morrow。　　Look

after　the　rest；　if　you　think　fit。　　Alas！　I　have　failed　in　our

agreement；　for　you　have　forbidden　me　to　write　to　you；　or　to　despatch

a　messenger　to　you。　　However；　I　do　not　intend　to　offend　you：　if　you

knew　with　what　fears　I　am　agitated；　you　would　not　have　yourself　so

many　doubts　and　suspicions。　　But　I　take　them　in　good　part；　persuaded

as　I　am　that　they　have　no　other　cause　than　lovelove　that　I　esteem

more　than　anything　on　earth。



〃My　feelings　and　my　favours　are　to　me　sure　warrants　for　that　love；

and　answer　to　me　for　your　heart；　my　trust　is　entire　on　this　head：　but

explain　yourself；　I　entreat　you；　and　open　your　soul　to　me；　otherwise；

I　shall　fear　lest；　by　the　fatality　of　my　star；　and　by　the　too

fortunate　influence　of　the　stars　on　women　less　tender　and　less

faithful　than　I；　I　may　be　supplanted　in　your　heart　as　Medea　was　in

Jason's；　not　that　I　wish　to　compare　you　to　a　lover　as　unfortunate　as

Jason；　and　to　parallel　myself　with　a　monster　like　Medea；　although　you

have　enough　influence　over　me　to　force　me　to　resemble　her　each　time

our　love　exacts　it；　and　that　it　concerns　me　to　keep　your　heart；　which

belongs　to　me；　and　which　belongs　to　me　only。　　For　I　name　as　belonging

to　me　what　I　have　purchased　with　the　tender　and　constant　love　with

which　I　have　burned　for　you；　a　love　more　alive　to…day　than　ever；　and

which　will　end　only　with　my　life；　a　love；　in　short；　which　makes　me

despise　both　the　dangers　and　the　remorse　which　will　be　perhaps　its

sad　sequel。　　As　the　price　of　this　sacrifice；　I　ask　you　but　one

favour；　it　is　to　remember　a　spot　not　far　from　here：　I　do　not　exact

that　you　should　keep　your　promise　to…morrow；　but　I　want　to　see　you　to

disperse　your　suspicions。　　I　ask　of　God　only　one　thing：　it　is　that　He

should　make　you　read　my　heart；　which　is　less　mine　than　yours；　and

that　He　should　guard　you　from　every　ill；　at　least　during　my　life：

this　life　is　dear　to　me　only　in　so　far　as　it　pleases　you；　and　as　I

please　you　myself。　　I　am　going　to　bed：　adieu；　give　me　your　news　to…

morrow　morning；　for　I　shall　be　uneasy　till　I　have　it。　　Like　a　bird

escaped　from　its　cage；　or　the　turtle…dove　which　has　lost　her　mate；　I

shall　be　alone；　weeping　your　absence；　short　as　it　may　be。　　This

letter；　happier　than　I；　will　go　this　evening　where　I　cannot　go；

provided　that　the　messenger　does　not　find　you　asleep；　as　I　fear。　　I

have　not　dared　to　write　it　in　the　presence　of　Joseph；　of　Sebastian；

and　of　Joachim；　who　had　only　just　left　me　when　I　began　it。〃





Thus；　as　one　sees；　and　always　supposing　these　letters　to　be　genuine；

Mary　had　conceived　for