the legacy of cain-第24节
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that day had come and gone！
I try not to take gloomy views of things； but I am not quite so
happy as I had expected to be when my dear was in the same town
with me。 If papa had encouraged him to call again； we might have
had some precious time to ourselves。 As it is； we can only meet
in the different show…places in the townwith Helena on one
side； and Miss Jillgall on the other； to take care of us。 I do
call it cruel not to let two young people love each other；
without setting third persons to watch them。 If I was Queen of
England； I would have pretty private bowers made for lovers； in
the summer； and nice warm little rooms to hold two； in the
winter。 Why not？ What harm could come of it； I should like to
know？
The cathedral is the place of meeting which we find most
convenient； under the circumstances。 There are delightful nooks
and corners about this celebrated building in which lovers can
lag behind。 If we had been in papa's chapel I should have
hesitated to turn it to such a profane use as this； the cathedral
doesn't so much matter。
Shall I own that I felt my inferiority to Helena a little keenly？
She could tell Philip so many things that I should have liked to
tell him first。 My clever sister taught him how to pronounce the
name of the bishop who began building the cathedral； she led him
over the crypt； and told him how old it was。 He was interested in
the crypt； he talked to Helena （not to me） of his ambition to
write a work on cathedral architecture in England； he made a
rough little sketch in his book of our famous tomb of some king。
Helena knew the late royal personage's name； and Philip showed
his sketch to her before he showed it to me。 How can I blame him；
when I stood there the picture of stupidity； trying to recollect
something that I might tell him； if it was only the Dean's name？
Helena might have whispered it to me； I think。 She remembered it；
not Iand mentioned it to Philip； of course。 I kept close by him
all the time； and now and then he gave me a look which raised my
spirits。 He might have given me something better than thatI
mean a kisswhen we had left the cathedral； and were by
ourselves for a moment in a corner of the Dean's garden。 But he
missed the opportunity。 Perhaps he was afraid of the Dean himself
coming that way； and happening to see us。 However； I am far from
thinking the worse of Philip。 I gave his arm a little
squeezeand that was better than nothing。
。 。 。 。 。 。 。
He and I took a walk along the bank of the river to…day； my
sister and Miss Jillgall looking after us as usual。
On our way through the town； Helena stopped to give an order at a
shop。 She asked us to wait for her。 That best of good creatures；
Miss Jillgall； whispered in my ear： 〃Go on by yourselves； and
leave me to wait for her。〃 Philip interpreted this act of
kindness in a manner which would have vexed me； if I had not
understood that it was one of his jokes。 He said to me： 〃Miss
Jillgall sees a chance of annoying your sister； and enjoys the
prospect。〃
Well； away we went together； it was just what I wanted； it gave
me an opportunity of saying something to Philip； between
ourselves。
I could now beg of him； in his interests and mine； to make the
best of himself when he came to dinner。 Clever people； I told
him； were people whom papa liked and admired。 I said： 〃Let him
see； dear； how clever _you_ are； and how many things you
knowand you can't imagine what a high place you will have in
his opinion。 I hope you don't think I am taking too much on
myself in telling you how to behave。〃
He relieved that doubt in a manner which I despair of describing。
His eyes rested on me with such a look of exquisite sweetness and
love that I was obliged to hold by his arm； I trembled so with
the pleasure of feeling it。
〃I do sincerely believe；〃 he said； 〃that you are the most
innocent girl； the sweetest； truest girl that ever lived。 I wish
I was a better man； Eunice； I wish I was good enough to be worthy
of you！〃
To hear him speak of himself in that way jarred on me。 If such
words had fallen from any other man's lips； I should have been
afraid that he had done something； or thought something； of which
he had reason to feel ashamed。 With Philip this was impossible。
He was eager to walk on rapidly； and to turn a corner in the
path； before we could be seen。 〃I want to be alone with you；〃 he
said。
I looked back。 We were too late； Helena and Miss Jillgall had
nearly overtaken us。 My sister was on the point of speaking to
Philip； when she seemed to change her mind； and only looked at
him。 Instead of looking at her in return； he kept his eyes cast
down and drew figures on the pathway with his stick。 I think
Helena was out of temper； she suddenly turned my way。 〃Why didn't
you wait for me？〃 she asked。
Philip took her up sharply。 〃If Eunice likes seeing the river
better than waiting in the street；〃 he said； 〃isn't she free to
do as she pleases？〃
Helena said nothing more； Philip walked on slowly by himself。 Not
knowing what to make of it； I turned to Miss Jillgall。
〃Surely Phi lip can't have quarreled with Helena？〃 I said。
Miss Jillgall answered in an odd off…hand manner： 〃Not he！ He is
a great deal more likely to have quarreled with himself。〃
〃Why？〃
〃Suppose you ask him why？〃
It was not to be thought of； it would have looked like prying
into his thoughts。 〃Selina！〃 I said； 〃there is something odd
about you to…day。 What is the matter？ I don't understand you。〃
〃My poor dear； you will find yourself understanding me before
long。〃 I thought I saw something like pity in her face when she
said that。
〃My poor dear？〃 I repeated。 〃What makes you speak to me in that
way？〃
〃I don't knowI'm tired； I'm an old fool I'll go back to the
house。〃
Without another word； she left me。 I turned to look for Philip；
and saw that my sister had joined him while I had been speaking
to Miss Jillgall。 It pleased me to find that they were talking in
a friendly way when I joined them。 A quarrel between Helena and
my husband that is to beno； my husband that _shall_ bewould
have been too distressing； too unnatural I might almost call it。
Philip looked along the backward path； and asked what had become
of Miss Jillgall。 〃Have you any objection to follow her example？〃
he said to me； when I told him that Selina had returned to the
town。 〃I don't care for the banks of this river。〃
Helena； who used to like the river at other times； was as ready
as Philip to leave it now。 I fancy they had both been kindly
waiting to change our walk； till I came to them； and they could
study my wishes too。 Of course I was ready to go where they
pleased。 I asked Philip if there was anything he would like to
see； when we got into the streets again。
Clever Helena suggested what seemed to be a strange amusement to
offer to Philip。 〃Let's take him to the Girls' School；〃 she said。
It appeared to be a matter of perfect indifference to him； he
was； what they call； ironical。 〃Oh； yes； of course。 Deeply
interesting！ deeply interesting！〃 He suddenly broke into the
wildest good spirits； and tucked my hand under his arm with a
gayety which it was impossible to resist。 〃What a boy you are！〃
Helena said； enjoying his delightful hilarity as I did。
CHAPTER XXIV。
EUNICE'S DIARY。
ON entering the schoolroom we lost our gayety； all in a moment。
Something unpleasant had evidently happened。
Two of the eldest girls were sitting together in a corner；
separated from the rest； and looking most wickedly sulky。 The
teachers were at the other end of the room； appearing to be ill
at ease。 And there； standing in the midst of them； with his face
flushed and his eyes angrythere was papa； sadly unlike his
gentle self in the days of his health and happiness。 On former
occasions； when the exercise of his authority was required in the
school； his forbearing temper always set things right。 When I saw
him now； I thought of what the doctor had said of his health； on
my way home from the station。
Papa advanced to us the moment we showed ourselves at the door。
He shook handscordially shook handswith Philip。 It was
delightful to see him； delightful to hear him say： 〃Pray don't
suppose； Mr。 Dunboyne； that you are intruding； remain with us by
all means if you like。〃 Then he spoke to Helena and to me； still
excited； still not like himself： 〃You couldn't have come here； my
dears； at a time when your presence was more urgently needed。〃 He
turned to the teachers。 〃Tell my daughters what has happened；
tell them why they see me hereshocked and distressed； I don't
deny it。〃
We now heard that the two girls in disgrace had broken the rules；
and in such a manner as to deserve severe punishment。
One of them had been discovered hiding a novel in her desk。 The
other had misbehaved herself more seriously stillshe had gone
to the theater。 Instead of expressing any regret； they had
actually dared to complain of having to learn papa's improved
catechism。 They had even accused him of treating them with
severity； because they were poor girls brought up on charity。 〃If
we had been young ladies；〃 they were audacious enough to say；
〃more indulgence would have been show
