autobiography of a pocket-handkerchief-第9节

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they　coin　money；　but；　in　this　shop；　no　one　will　give　more　than　five　francs
for　that　thimble。〃

Had　Adrienne　been　longer　in　communion　with　a　cold　and　heartless
world；　she　would　not　have　submitted　to　this　piece　of　selfish　extortion；
but；　inexperienced；　and　half　frightened　by　the　woman's　manner；　she
begged　the　pittance　offered　as　a　boon；　dropped　her　thimble；　and　made
a　hasty　retreat。　When　the　poor　girl　reached　the　street；　she　began　to
reflect　on　what　she　had　done。　Five　francs　would　scarcely　support　her
grandmother　a　week；　with　even　the　wood　and　wine　she　had　on　hand；
and　she　had　no　more　gold　thimbles　to　sacrifice。　A　heavy　sigh　broke
from　her　bosom；　and　tears　stood　in　her　eyes。　But　she　was　wanted　at
home；　and　had　not　the　leisure　to　reflect　on　her　own　mistake。



CHAPTER　VI。

Occupation　is　a　blessed　relief　to　the　miserable。　Of　all　the　ingenious
modes　of　torture　that　have　ever　been　invented；　that　of　solitary
confinement　is　probably　the　most　cruelthe　mind　feeding　on　itself　with
the　rapacity　of　a　cormorant；　when　the　conscience　quickens　its　activity
and　feeds　its　longings。　Happily　for　Adrienne；　she　had　too　many　positive
cares；　to　be　enabled　to　waste　many　minutes　either　in　retrospection；　or　in
endeavors　to　conjecture　the　future。　Farfar　more　happily　for　herself；
her　conscience　was　clear；　for　never　had　a　purer　mind；　or　a　gentler　spirit
dwelt　in　female　breast。　Still　she　could　blame　her　own　oversight；　and　it
was　days　before　her　self…upbraidings；　for　thus　trifling　with　what　she
conceived　to　be　the　resources　of　her　beloved　grandmother；　were　driven
from　her　thoughts　by　the　pressure　of　other　and　greater　ills。

Were　I　to　last　a　thousand　years；　and　rise　to　the　dignity　of　being　the
handkerchief　that　the　Grand　Turk　is　said　to　toss　toward　his　favorite；　I
could　not　forget　the　interest　with　which　I　accompanied　Adrienne　to　the
door　of　her　little　apartment；　in　the　entresol。　She　was　in　the　habit　of　hiring
little　Nathalie；　the　porter's　daughter；　to　remain　with　her　grandmother
during　her　own　necessary　but　brief　absences；　and　this　girl　was　found　at
the　entrance；　eager　to　be　relieved。

〃Has　my　grandmother　asked　for　me；　Nathalie？〃　demanded　Adrienne；
anxiously；　the　moment　they　met。

〃Non；　mademoiselle；　madame　has　done　nothing　but　sleep；　and　I　was
getting　SO　tired！〃

The　sou　was　given；　and　the　porter's　daughter　disappeared；　leaving
Adrienne　alone　in　the　ante…chamber。　The　furniture　of　this　little　apartment
was　very　respectable；　for　Madame　de　la　Rocheaimard；　besides　paying
a　pretty　fair　rent；　had　hired　it　just　after　the　revolution；　when　the　prices
had　fallen　quite　half；　and　the　place　had；　by　no　means；　the　appearance　of
that　poverty　which　actually　reigned　within。　Adrienne　went　through　the
ante…chamber；　which　served　also　as　a　salle　a　manger；　and　passed　a
small　saloon；　into　the　bed…chamber　of　her　parent。　Here　her　mind　was
relieved　by　finding　all　right。　She　gave　her　grandmother　some
nourishment；　inquired　tenderly　as　to　her　wishes；　executed　several　little
necessary　offices；　and　then　sat　down　to　work　for　her　own　daily　bread；
every　moment　being　precious　to　one　so　situated。　I　expected　to　be
examinedperhaps　caressed；　fondled；　or　praised；　but　no　such　attention
awaited　me。　Adrienne　had　arranged　every　thing　in　her　own　mind；　and　I
was　to　be　produced　only　at　those　extra　hours　in　the　morning；　when　she
had　been　accustomed　to　take　exercise　in　the　open　air。　For　the　moment　I
was　laid　aside；　though　in　a　place　that　enabled　me　to　be　a　witness　of　all
that　occurred。　The　day　passed　in　patient　toil；　on　the　part　of　the　poor
girl；　the　only　relief　she　enjoyed　being　those　moments　when　she　was
called　on　to　attend　to　the　wants　of　her　grandmother。　A　light　potage；　with
a　few　grapes　and　bread；　composed　her　dinner；　even　of　these　I
observed　that　she　laid　aside　nearly　half　for　the　succeeding　day；　doubts
of　her　having　the　means　of　supporting　her　parent　until　the　handkerchief
was　completed　beginning　to　beset　her　mind。　It　was　these　painful　and
obtrusive　doubts　that　most　distressed　the　dear　girl；　now；　for　the
expectation　of　reaping　a　reward　comparatively　brilliant；　from　the
ingenious　device　to　repair　her　means　on　which　she　had　fallen；　was
strong　within　her。　Poor　child！　her　misgivings　were　the　overflowings　of　a
tender　heart；　while　her　hopes　partook　of　the　sanguine　character　of　youth
and　inexperience！

｛salle　a　manger　=　dining　room；　salon　=　living　room；　potage　=　soup｝

My　turn　came　the　following　morning。　It　was　now　spring；　and　this　is　a
season　of　natural　delights　at　Paris。　We　were　already　in　April；　and　the
flowers　had　begun　to　shed　their　fragrance　on　the　air；　and　to　brighten　the
aspect　of　the　public　gardens。　Mad。　de　la　Rocheaimard　usually　slept　the
soundest　at　this　hour；　and；　hitherto；　Adrienne　had　not　hesitated　to　leave
her；　while　she　went　herself　to　the　nearest　public　promenade；　to　breathe
the　pure　air　and　to　gain　strength　for　the　day。　In　future；　she　was　to　deny
herself　this　sweet　gratification。　It　was　such　a　sacrifice；　as　the　innocent
and　virtuous；　and　I　may　add　the　tasteful；　who　are　cooped　up　amid　the
unnatural　restraints　of　a　town；　will　best　know　how　to　appreciate。　Still　it
was　made　without　a　murmur；　though　not　without　a　sigh。

When　Adrienne　laid　me　on　the　frame　where　I　was　to　be　ornamented　by
her　own　pretty　hands；　she　regarded　me　with　a　look　of　delight；　nay；　even
of　affection；　that　I　shall　never　forget。　As　yet　she　felt　none　of　the　malign
consequences　of　the　self…denial　she　was　about　to　exert。　If　not　blooming；
her　cheeks　still　retained　some　of　their　native　color；　and　her　eye；
thoughtful　and　even　sad；　was　not　yet　anxious　and　sunken。　She　was
pleased　with　her　purchase；　and　she　contemplated　prodigies　in　the　way
of　results。　Adrienne　was　unusually　skillful　with　the　needle；　and　her　taste
had　been　so　highly　cultivated；　as　to　make　her　a　perfect　mistress　of　all
the　proprieties　of　patterns。　At　the　time　it　was　thought　of　making　an
offering　of　all　our　family　to　the　dauphine；　the　idea　of　working　the
handkerchiefs　was　entertained；　and　some　designs　of　exquisite　beauty
and　neatness　had　been　prepared。　They　were　not　simple；　vulgar；
unmeaning　ornaments；　such　as　the　uncultivated　seize　upon　with　avidity
on　account　of　their　florid　appearance；　but　well　devised　drawings；　that
were　replete　with　taste　and　thought；　and　afforded　some　apology　for　the
otherwise　senseless　luxury　contemplated；　by　aiding　in　refining　the
imagination；　and　cultivating　the　intellect。　She　had　chosen　one　of　the
simplest　and　most　beautiful　of　these　designs；　intending　to　transfer　it　to
my　face；　by　means　of　the　needle。

The　first　stitch　was　made　just　as　the　clocks　were　striking　the　hour　of
five；　on　the　morning　of　the　fourteenth　of　April；　1831。　The　last　was
drawn　that　day　two　months；　precisely　as　the　same　clocks　struck　twelve。
For　four　hours　Adrienne　sat　bending　over　her　toil；　deeply　engrossed　in
the　occupation；　and　flattering　herself　with　the　fruits　of　her　success。　I
learned　much　of　the　excellent　child's　true　character　in　these　brief　hours。
Her　mind　wandered　over　her　hopes　and　fears；　recurring　to　her　other
labors；　and　the　prices　she　received　for　occupations　so　wearying　and
slavish。　By　the　milliner；　she　was　paid　merely　as　a　common　sewing…girl；
though　her　neatness；　skill　and　taste　might　well　have　entitled　her　to
double　wages。　A　franc　a　day　was　the　usual　price　for　girls　of　an　inferior
caste；　and　out　of　this　they　were　expected　to　find　their　own　lodgings　and
food。　But　the　poor　revolution　had　still　a　great　deal　of　private　misery　to
answer　for；　in　the　way　of　reduced　wages。　Those　who　live　on　the
frivolities　of　mankind；　or；　what　is　the　same　thing；　their　luxuries；　have　two
sets　of　victims　to　plunderthe　consumer；　and　the　real　producer；　or　the
operative。　This　is　true　where　men　are　employed；　but　much　truer　in　the
case　of　females。　The　last　are　usually　so　helpless；　that　they　often　cling　to
oppression　and　wrong；　rather　than　submit　to　be　cast　entirely　upon　the
world。　The　marchande　de　mode　who　employed　Adrienne　was　as　rusee
as　a　politician　who　had　followed　all　the　tergiversations　of　Gallic　policy；
since　the　year　'89。　She　was　fully　aware　of　what　a　prize　she　possessed　in
the　unpracticed　girl；　and　she　felt　the　importance　of　keeping　her　in
ignorance　of　her　own　value。　By　paying　the　franc；　it　might　give　her
assistant　premature　notions　of　her　own　importance；　but；　by　bringing　her
down　to　fifteen　sous；　humility　could　be　inculcated；　and　the　chance　of
keeping　her　doubled。　This；　which　would　have　defeated　a　bargain　with
any　common　couturiere；　succeeded　perfectly　with　Adrienne。　She
received　her　fifteen　sous　with　humble　thankfulness；　in　constant
apprehension　of　losing　even　that　miserable　pittance。　Nor　would　her
employer　consent　to　let　her　work　by　the　piece；　at　which　the　dear　child
might　have　earned　at　least　thirty　sous；　for　she　discovered　that　she　had　to
deal　with　a　person　of　conscience；　and　that　in　no　mode　could　as　much　be
possibly　extracted　from　the　assistant；　as　by　confiding　to　her　own　honor。
At　nine　each　day　she　was　to　breakfast。　At　a　quarter　past　nine；　precisely；
to　commence　work　for　her　employer；　at　one；　she　had　a　remission　of　half
an　hour；　and　at　six；　she　became　her　own　mistress。

｛marchande　de　mode　=　milliner；　rusee　=　crafty；　couturiere　=
seamstress｝