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usually is out of doors; and indeed I thought rather more so。  We

all agreed (for the time) that honesty was the best policy; and we

were as hard as iron upon Vice; and we wouldn't hear of Villainy

getting on in the world … no; not on any consideration whatever。



Between the pieces; we almost all of us went out and refreshed。

Many of us went the length of drinking beer at the bar of the

neighbouring public…house; some of us drank spirits; crowds of us

had sandwiches and ginger…beer at the refreshment…bars established

for us in the Theatre。  The sandwich … as substantial as was

consistent with portability; and as cheap as possible … we hailed

as one of our greatest institutions。  It forced its way among us at

all stages of the entertainment; and we were always delighted to

see it; its adaptability to the varying moods of our nature was

surprising; we could never weep so comfortably as when our tears

fell on our sandwich; we could never laugh so heartily as when we

choked with sandwich; Virtue never looked so beautiful or Vice so

deformed as when we paused; sandwich in hand; to consider what

would come of that resolution of Wickedness in boots; to sever

Innocence in flowered chintz from Honest Industry in striped

stockings。  When the curtain fell for the night; we still fell back

upon sandwich; to help us through the rain and mire; and home to

bed。



This; as I have mentioned; was Saturday night。  Being Saturday

night; I had accomplished but the half of my uncommercial journey;

for; its object was to compare the play on Saturday evening with

the preaching in the same Theatre on Sunday evening。



Therefore; at the same hour of half…past six on the similarly damp

and muddy Sunday evening; I returned to this Theatre。  I drove up

to the entrance (fearful of being late; or I should have come on

foot); and found myself in a large crowd of people who; I am happy

to state; were put into excellent spirits by my arrival。  Having

nothing to look at but the mud and the closed doors; they looked at

me; and highly enjoyed the comic spectacle。  My modesty inducing me

to draw off; some hundreds of yards; into a dark corner; they at

once forgot me; and applied themselves to their former occupation

of looking at the mud and looking in at the closed doors:  which;

being of grated ironwork; allowed the lighted passage within to be

seen。  They were chiefly people of respectable appearance; odd and

impulsive as most crowds are; and making a joke of being there as

most crowds do。



In the dark corner I might have sat a long while; but that a very

obliging passer…by informed me that the Theatre was already full;

and that the people whom I saw in the street were all shut out for

want of room。  After that; I lost no time in worming myself into

the building; and creeping to a place in a Proscenium box that had

been kept for me。



There must have been full four thousand people present。  Carefully

estimating the pit alone; I could bring it out as holding little

less than fourteen hundred。  Every part of the house was well

filled; and I had not found it easy to make my way along the back

of the boxes to where I sat。  The chandeliers in the ceiling were

lighted; there was no light on the stage; the orchestra was empty。

The green curtain was down; and; packed pretty closely on chairs on

the small space of stage before it; were some thirty gentlemen; and

two or three ladies。  In the centre of these; in a desk or pulpit

covered with red baize; was the presiding minister。  The kind of

rostrum he occupied will be very well understood; if I liken it to

a boarded…up fireplace turned towards the audience; with a

gentleman in a black surtout standing in the stove and leaning

forward over the mantelpiece。



A portion of Scripture was being read when I went in。  It was

followed by a discourse; to which the congregation listened with

most exemplary attention and uninterrupted silence and decorum。  My

own attention comprehended both the auditory and the speaker; and

shall turn to both in this recalling of the scene; exactly as it

did at the time。



'A very difficult thing;' I thought; when the discourse began; 'to

speak appropriately to so large an audience; and to speak with

tact。  Without it; better not to speak at all。  Infinitely better;

to read the New Testament well; and to let THAT speak。  In this

congregation there is indubitably one pulse; but I doubt if any

power short of genius can touch it as one; and make it answer as

one。'



I could not possibly say to myself as the discourse proceeded; that

the minister was a good speaker。  I could not possibly say to

myself that he expressed an understanding of the general mind and

character of his audience。  There was a supposititious working…man

introduced into the homily; to make supposititious objections to

our Christian religion and be reasoned down; who was not only a

very disagreeable person; but remarkably unlike life … very much

more unlike it than anything I had seen in the pantomime。  The

native independence of character this artisan was supposed to

possess; was represented by a suggestion of a dialect that I

certainly never heard in my uncommercial travels; and with a coarse

swing of voice and manner anything but agreeable to his feelings; I

should conceive; considered in the light of a portrait; and as far

away from the fact as a Chinese Tartar。  There was a model pauper

introduced in like manner; who appeared to me to be the most

intolerably arrogant pauper ever relieved; and to show himself in

absolute want and dire necessity of a course of Stone Yard。  For;

how did this pauper testify to his having received the gospel of

humility?  A gentleman met him in the workhouse; and said (which I

myself really thought good…natured of him); 'Ah; John?  I am sorry

to see you here。  I am sorry to see you so poor。'  'Poor; sir!'

replied that man; drawing himself up; 'I am the son of a Prince!

MY father is the King of Kings。  MY father is the Lord of Lords。

MY father is the ruler of all the Princes of the Earth!' &c。  And

this was what all the preacher's fellow…sinners might come to; if

they would embrace this blessed book … which I must say it did some

violence to my own feelings of reverence; to see held out at arm's

length at frequent intervals and soundingly slapped; like a slow

lot at a sale。  Now; could I help asking myself the question;

whether the mechanic before me; who must detect the preacher as

being wrong about the visible manner of himself and the like of

himself; and about such a noisy lip…server as that pauper; might

not; most unhappily for the usefulness of the occasion; doubt that

preacher's being right about things not visible to human senses?



Again。  Is it necessary or advisable to address such an audience

continually as 'fellow…sinners'?  Is it not enough to be fellow…

creatures; born yesterday; suffering and striving to…day; dying to…

morrow?  By our common humanity; my brothers and sisters; by our

common capacities for pain and pleasure; by our common laughter and

our common tears; by our common aspiration to reach something

better than ourselves; by our common tendency to believe in

something good; and to invest whatever we love or whatever we lose

with some qualities that are superior to our own failings and

weaknesses as we know them in our own poor hearts … by these; Hear

me! … Surely; it is enough to be fellow…creatures。  Surely; it

includes the other designation; and some touching meanings over and

above。



Again。  There was a personage introduced into the discourse (not an

absolute novelty; to the best of my remembrance of my reading); who

had been personally known to the preacher; and had been quite a

Crichton in all the ways of philosophy; but had been an infidel。

Many a time had the preacher talked with him on that subject; and

many a time had he failed to convince that intelligent man。  But he

fell ill; and died; and before he died he recorded his conversion …

in words which the preacher had taken down; my fellow…sinners; and

would read to you from this piece of paper。  I must confess that to

me; as one of an uninstructed audience; they did not appear

particularly edifying。  I thought their tone extremely selfish; and

I thought they had a spiritual vanity in them which was of the

before…mentioned refractory pauper's family。



All slangs and twangs are objectionable everywhere; but the slang

and twang of the conventicle … as bad in its way as that of the

House of Commons; and nothing worse can be said of it … should be

studiously avoided under such circumstances as I describe。  The

avoidance was not complete on this occasion。  Nor was it quite

agreeable to see the preacher addressing his pet 'points' to his

backers on the stage; as if appealing to those disciples to show

him up; and testify to the multitude that each of those points was

a clincher。



But;

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