thais(塞斯)-第5节
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in the dirt or a mischievous ape？〃
Paphnutius' only aim was the glory of God。 His anger vanished； and he
apologised with noble humility。
〃Pardon me； old man； my brother；〃 he said； 〃if zeal for the truth has
carried me beyond proper bounds。 God is my witness； that it is thy errors
and not thyself that I hate。 I suffer to see thee in darkness； for I love thee
in Jesus Christ； and care for thy salvation fills my heart。 Speak！ give me
your reasons。 I long to know them that I may refute them。〃
The old man replied quietly
〃It is the same to me whether I speak or remain silent。 I will give my
reasons without asking yours in return； for I have no interest in you at all。 I
care neither for your happiness nor your misfortune； and it matters not to
me whether you think one way or another。 Why should I love you； or hate
you？ Aversion and sympathy are equally unworthy of the wise man。 But
since you question me； know then that I am named Timocles； and that I
was born at Cos； of parents made rich by commerce。 My father was a
shipowner。 In intelligence he much resembled Alexander； who is surnamed
the Great。 But he was not so gross。 In short； he was a man of no great parts。
I had two brothers； who； like him； were shipowners。 As for me； I followed
wisdom。 My eldest brother was compelled by my father to marry a Carian
woman； named Timaessa； who displeased him so greatly that he could not
live with her without falling into a deep melancholy。 However； Timaessa
inspired our younger brother with a criminal passion； and this passion
soon turned to a furious madness。 The Carian woman hated them both
equally； but she loved a flute…player； and received him at night in her
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chamber。 One morning he left there the wreath which he usually wore at
feasts。 My two brothers； having found this wreath； swore to kill the flute…
player； and the next day they caused him to perish under the lash； in spite
of his tears and prayers。 My sister…in…law felt such grief that she lost her
reason； and these three poor wretches became beasts rather than human
beings； and wandered insane along the shores of Cos； howling like wolves
and foaming at the mouth； and hooted at by the children； who threw shells
and stones at them。 They died； and my father buried them with his own
hands。 A little later his stomach refused all nourishment； and he died of
hunger； though he was rich enough to have bought all the meats and fruits
in the markets of Asia。 He was deeply grieved at having to leave me his
fortune。 I used it in travels。 I visited Italy； Greece； and Africa without
meeting a single person who was either wise or happy。 I studied
philosophy at Athens and Alexandria； and was deafened by noisy
arguments。 At last I wandered as far as India； and I saw on the banks of the
Ganges a naked man； who had sat there motionless with his legs crossed
for more than thirty years。 Climbing plants twined round his dried up body；
and the birds built their nests in his hair。 Yet he lived。 At the sight of him I
called to mind Timaessa； the flute…player； my two brothers； and my father；
and I realised that this Indian was a wise man。 'Men；' I said to myself；
'suffer because they are deprived of that which they believe to be good； or
because； possessing it they fear to lose it； or because they endure that
which they believe to be an evil。 Put an end to all beliefs of this kind； and
the evils would disappear。' That is why I resolved henceforth to deem
nothing an advantage； to tear myself entirely from the good things of this
world； and to live silent and motionless； like the Indian。〃
Paphnutius had listened attentively to the old man's story。
〃Timocles of Cos；〃 he replied； 〃I own that your discourse is not wholly
devoid of sense。 It is； in truth； wise to despise the riches of this world。 But
it would be absurd to despise also your eternal welfare； and render
yourself liable to be visited by the wrath of God。 I grieve at your
ignorance； Timocles； and I will instruct you in the truth； in order that
knowing that there really exists a God in three hypostases； you may obey
this God as a child obeys its father。〃
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Timocles interrupted him。
〃Refrain； stranger； from showing me your doctrines； and do not
imagine that you will persuade me to share your opinions。 All discussions
are useless。 My opinion is to have no opinion。 My life is devoid of trouble
because I have no preferences。 Go thy ways； and strive not to withdraw
me from the beneficent apathy in which I am plunged； as though in a
delicious bath； after the hardships of my past days。〃
Paphnutius was profoundly instructed in all things relating to the faith。
By his knowledge of the human heart； he was aware that the grace of God
had not fallen on old Timocles； and the day of salvation for this soul so
obstinately resolved to ruin itself had not yet come。 He did not reply； lest
the power given for edification should turn to destruction。 For it
sometimes happens； in disputing with infidels； that the means used for
their conversion may steep them still farther in sin。 Therefore they who
possess the truth should take care how they spread it。
〃Farewell； then； unhappy Timocles；〃 he said； and heaving a deep sigh；
he resumed his pious pilgrimage through the night。
In the morning； he saw the ibises motionless on one leg at the edge of
the water； which reflected their pale pink necks。 The willows stretched
their soft grey foliage to the bank； cranes flew in a triangle in the clear sky；
and the cry of unseen herons was heard from the sedges。 Far as the eye
could reach； the river rolled its broad green waters o'er which white sails；
like the wings of birds； glided； and here and there on the shores； a white
house shone out。 A light mist floated along the banks； and from out the
shadow of the islands； which were laden with palms； flowers； and fruits；
came noisy flocks of ducks； geese； flamingoes； and teal。 To the left； the
grassy valley extended to the desert its fields and orchards in joyful
abundance； the sun shone on the yellow wheat； and the earth exhaled forth
its fecundity in odorous wafts。 At this sight； Paphnutius fell on his knees；
and cried
〃Blessed be the Lord； who has given a happy issue to my journey。 O
God； who spreadest Thy dew upon the fig trees of the Arsiniote； pour Thy
grace upon Thais； whom Thou hast formed with Thy love； as Thou hast
the flowers and trees of the field。 May she； by Thy loving care； flourish
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like a sweet…scented rose in the heavenly Jerusalem。〃
And every time that he saw a tree covered with blossom； or a bird of
brilliant plumage； he thought of Thais。 Keeping along the left arm of the
river and through a fertile and populous district； he reached； in a few days；
the city of Alexandria； which the Greeks have surnamed the Beautiful and
the Golden。 The sun had risen an hour； when he beheld； from the top of a
hill； the vast city； the roofs of which glittered in the rosy light。 He stopped；
and folded his arms on his breast。
〃There； then；〃 he said； 〃is the delightful spot where I was born in sin；
the bright air where I breathed poisonous perfumes； the sea of pleasure
where I heard the songs of the sirens。 There is my cradle； after the flesh；
my native landin the parlance of the men of these days！ A rich cradle； an
illustrious country； in the judgment of men！ It is natural that thy children
should reverence thee like a mother； Alexandria； and I was begotten in thy
magnificently adorned breast。 But the ascetic despises nature； the mystic
scorns appearances； the Christian regards his native land as a place of
exile； the monk is not of this earth。 I have turned away my heart from
loving thee； Alexandria。 I hate thee！ I hate thee for thy riches； thy science；
thy pleasures； and thy beauty。 Be accursed； temple of demons！ Lewd
couch
