thais(塞斯)-第37节
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〃the Lord has tried me with terrible temptations。 I was not carried away by
angels。 But a shadowy wall is raised in front of my eyes； and moves before
me。 I have lived in a dream。 Without God all is a dream。 When I made my
journey to Alexandria； I heard； in a short space of time； many discourses；
and I learned that the army of errors was innumerable。 It pursues me； and I
am compassed about with swords。〃
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Zozimus replied
〃Venerable father； we must remember that the saints； and especially
the solitary saints； undergo terrible trials。 If thou wast not carried to
heaven by the seraphs； it is certain that the Lord granted that favour to thy
image； for Flavian； the monks； and the people were witnesses of thy
assumption。〃
Paphnutius resolved to go and receive the blessing of Anthony。
〃Brother Zozimus；〃 he said； 〃give me one of these palm leaves； and let
us go and meet our father。〃
〃Let us go；〃 replied Zozimus； 〃military order is most befitting for
monks； who are God's soldiers。 Thou and I； being abbots； will march in
front； and the others shall follow us； singing psalms。〃
They set out on their march； and Paphnutius said
〃God is unity； for He is the truth； which is one。 The world is many；
because it is error。 We should turn away from all the sights of nature； even
those which appear the most innocent。 Their diversity renders them
pleasant； which is a sign that they are evil。 For that reason； I cannot see a
tuft of papyrus by the side of still waters without my soul being imbued
with melancholy。 All things that the senses perceive are detestable。 The
least grain of sand brings danger。 Everything tempts us。 Woman is but a
combination of all the temptations scattered in the thin air； on the
flowering earth； in the clear waters。 Happy is he whose soul is a sealed
vase！ Happy is he who knows how to be deaf； dumb； and blind； and who
knows nothing of the world； in order that he may know God！〃
Zozimus； having meditated upon these words； replied as follows
〃Venerable father； it is fitting that I should avow my sins to thee； since
thou hast shown me thy soul。 Thus we shall confess to each other；
according to the apostolic custom。 Before I was a monk； I led an
abominable life。 At Madaura； a city celebrated for its courtesans； I sought
out all kinds of worldly love。 Every night I supped in company with young
debauchees and female flute players； and I took home with me the one
who pleased me the best。 A saint like thee could never imagine to what a
pitch the fury of my desires carried me。 Suffice it to say that it spared
neither matrons nor nuns； and spread adultery and sacrilege everywhere。 I
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excited my senses with wine； and was justly known as the heaviest drinker
in Madaura。 Yet I was a Christian； and； in all my follies； kept my faith in
Jesus crucified。 Having devoured my substance in riotous living； I was
beginning to feel the first attacks of poverty； when I saw one of my
companions in pleasure suddenly struck with a terrible disease。 His knees
could not sustain him； his twitching hands refused to obey him； his glazed
eyes closed。 Only horrible groans came from his breast。 His mind； heavier
than his body； slumbered。 To punish him for having lived like a beast； God
had changed him into a beast。 The loss of my property had already
inspired me with salutary reflections； but the example of my friend was of
yet greater efficacy； it made such an impression on my heart that I quitted
the world and retired into the desert。 There I have enjoyed for twenty years
a peace that nothing has troubled。 I work with my monks as weaver；
architect； carpenter； and even as scribe； though； to say the truth； I have
little taste for writing； having always preferred action to thought。 My days
are full of joy； and my nights without dreams； and I believe that the grace
of the Lord is in me； because； even in the midst of the most frightful sins； I
have never lost hope。〃
On hearing these words； Paphnutius lifted his eyes to heaven and
murmured
〃Lord； Thou lookest with kindness upon this man polluted by adultery；
sacrilege； and so many crimes； and Thou turnest away from me； who have
always kept Thy commandments！ How inscrutable is Thy justice； O my
God！ and how impenetrable are Thy ways！〃
Zozimus extended his arms。
〃Look； venerable father！ On both sides of the horizon are long； black
files that look like emigrant ants。 They are our brothers； who； like us； are
going to meet Anthony。〃
When they came to the place of meeting； they saw a magnificent
spectacle。 The army of monks extended； in three ranks； in an immense
semicircle。 In the first rank stood the old hermits of the desert； cross in
hand； and with long beards that almost touched the ground。 The monks；
governed by the abbots Ephrem and Serapion； and also all the cenobites of
the Nile； formed the second line。 Behind them appeared the ascetics； who
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had come from their distant rocks。 Some wore； on their blackened and
dried…up bodies； shapeless rags； others had for their only clothes； bundles
of reeds held together by withies。 Many of them were naked； but God had
covered them with a fell of hair as thick as a sheep's fleece。 All held
branches of palm； they looked like an emerald rainbow； or they might
have been also compared to the host of the electthe living walls of the
city of God。
Such perfect order reigned in the assembly； that Paphnutius found；
without difficulty； the monks he governed。 He placed himself near them；
after having taken care to hide his face under his hood； that he might
remain unknown； and not disturb them in their pious expectation。
Suddenly； an immense shout arose
〃The saint！〃 they all cried。 〃The saint！ Behold the great saint； against
whom hell has not prevailed； the well…beloved of God！ Our father；
Anthony！〃
Then a great silence followed； and every forehead was lowered to the
sand。
From the summit of a dune； in the vast void space； Anthony advanced；
supported by his beloved disciples； Macarius and Amathas。 He walked
slowly； but his figure was still upright； and showed the remains of a
superhuman strength。 His white beard spread over his broad chest； his
polished skull reflected the rays of sunlight like the forehead of Moses。
The keen gaze of the eagle was in his eyes； the smile of a child shone on
his round cheek。 To bless his people； he raised his arms； tired by a century
of marvellous works； and his voice burst forth for the last time； with the
words of love。
〃How goodly are thy tents； O Jacob； and thy tabernacles； O Israel！〃
Immediately； from one end to the other of the living wall； like a peal of
harmonious thunder； the psalm； 〃Blessed is the man that feareth the Lord；〃
broke forth。
Accompanied by Macarius and Amathas； Anthony passed along the
ranks of the old hermits； anchorites； and cenobites。 This seer； who had
beheld heaven and hell； this hermit； who from a cave in the rock； governed
the Christian Church； this saint； who had sustained the faith of the martyrs；
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this scholar； whose eloquence had paralysed the heretics； spoke tenderly to
each of his sons； and bade them a kindly farewell； on the eve of the
blessed death； which God； who loved him； had at last promised him。
He said to the abbots Ephrem and Serapion
〃You command large armies； and you are both great generals。
Therefore； you shall put on in heaven an armour of
