father and son-第15节

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at　it　was　in　this　capacity　that　she　would　in　future　take　her　place　in　our　household。　I　was　not　informed；　what　I　gradually　learned　by　observation；　that　she　would　also　act　in　it　as　housekeeper。

Miss　Marks　was　a　somewhat　grotesque　personage；　and　might　easily　be　painted　as　a　kind　of　eccentric　Dickens　character；　a　mixture　of　Mrs。　Pipchin　and　Miss　Sally　Brass。　I　will　confess　that　when；　in　years　to　come；　I　read　'Dombey　and　Son'；　certain　features　of　Mrs。　Pipchin　did　irresistibly　remind　me　of　my　excellent　past　governess。　I　can　imagine　Miss　Marks　saying；　but　with　a　facetious　intent；　that　children　who　sniffed　would　not　go　to　heaven。　But　I　was　instantly　ashamed　of　the　parallel；　because　my　gaunt　old　friend　was　a　thoroughly　good　and　honest　woman；　not　intelligent　and　not　graceful；　but　desirous　in　every　way　to　do　her　duty。　Her　duty　to　me　she　certainly　did；　and　I　am　afraid　I　hardly　rewarded　her　with　the　devotion　she　deserved。　From　the　first；　I　was　indifferent　to　her　wishes；　and；　as　much　as　was　convenient；　I　ignored　her　existence。　She　held　no　power　over　my　attention；　and　if　I　accepted　her　guidance　along　the　path　of　instruction；　it　was　because；　odd　as　it　may　sound；　I　really　loved　knowledge。　I　accepted　her　company　without　objection；　and　though　there　were　occasional　outbreaks　of　tantrums　on　both　sides；　we　got　on　very　well　together　for　several　years。　I　did　not；　however；　at　any　time　surrender　my　inward　will　to　the　wishes　of　Miss　Marks。

In　the　circle　of　our　life　the　religious　element　took　so　preponderating　a　place；　that　it　is　impossible　to　avoid　mentioning；　what　might　otherwise　seem　unimportant；　the　theological　views　of　Miss　Marks。　How　my　Father　had　discovered　her；　or　from　what　field　of　educational　enterprise　he　plucked　her　in　her　prime；　I　never　knew；　but　she　used　to　mention　that　my　Father's　ministrations　had　'opened　her　eyes'；　from　which　'scales'　had　fallen。　She　had　accepted；　on　their　presentation　to　her；　the　entire　gamut　of　his　principles。　Miss　Marks　was　accustomed；　while　putting　me　to　bed；　to　dwell　darkly　on　the　incidents　of　her　past；　which　had；　I　fear；　been　an　afflicted　one。　I　believe　I　do　her　rather　limited　intelligence　no　injury　when　I　say　that　it　was　prepared　to　swallow；　at　one　mouthful；　whatever　my　Father　presented　to　it；　so　delighted　was　its　way…worn　possessor　to　find　herself　in　a　comfortable；　or；　at　least；　an　independent　position。　She　soon　bowed；　if　there　was　indeed　any　resistance　from　the　first；　very　contentedly　in　the　House　of　Rimmon；　learning　to　repeat；　with　marked　fluency；　the　customary　formulas　and　shibboleths。　On　my　own　religious　development　she　had　no　great　influence。　Any　such　guttering　theological　rushlight　as　Miss　Marks　might　dutifully　exhibit　faded　for　me　in　the　blaze　of　my　Father's　glaring　beacon…lamp　of　faith。

Hardly　was　Miss　Marks　settled　in　the　family；　than　my　Father　left　us　on　an　expedition　about　which　my　curiosity　was　exercised；　but　not　until　later；　satisfied。　He　had　gone；　as　we　afterwards　found；　to　South　Devon；　to　a　point　on　the　coast　which　he　had　known　of　old。　Here　he　had　hired　a　horse；　and　had　ridden　about　until　he　saw　a　spot　he　liked；　where　a　villa　was　being　built　on　speculation。　Nothing　equals　the　courage　of　these　recluse　men；　my　Father　got　off　his　horse；　and　tied　it　to　the　gate；　and　then　he　went　in　and　bought　the　house　on　a　ninety…nine　years'　lease。　I　need　hardly　say　that　he　had　made　the　matter　a　subject　of　the　most　earnest　prayer；　and　had　entreated　the　Lord　for　guidance。　When　he　felt　attracted　to　this　particular　villa；　he　did　not　doubt　that　he　was　directed　to　it　in　answer　to　his　supplication；　and　he　wasted　no　time　in　further　balancing　or　inquiring。　On　my　eighth　birthday；　with　bag　and　baggage　complete；　we　all　made　the　toilful　journey　down　into　Devonshire；　and　I　was　a　town…child　no　longer。



CHAPTER　V

A　NEW　element　now　entered　into　my　life；　a　fresh　rival　arose　to　compete　for　me　with　my　Father's　dogmatic　theology。　This　rival　was　the　Sea。　When　Wordsworth　was　a　little　child；　the　presence　of　the　mountains　and　the　clouds　lighted　up　his　spirit　with　gleams　that　were　like　the　flashing　of　a　shield。　He　has　described；　in　the　marvellous　pages　of　the　'Prelude'；　the　impact　of　nature　upon　the　infant　soul；　but　he　has　described　it　vaguely　and　faintly；　with　some　'infirmity　of　love　for　days　disowned　by　memory'；I　think　because　he　was　brought　up　in　the　midst　of　spectacular　beauty；　and　could　name　no　moment；　mark　no　'here'　or　'now'；　when　the　wonder　broke　upon　him。　It　was　at　the　age　of　twice　five　summers；　he　thought；　that　he　began　to　hold　unconscious　intercourse　with　nature；　'drinking　in　a　pure　organic　pleasure'　from　the　floating　mists　and　winding　waters。　Perhaps；　in　his　anxiety　to　be　truthful；　and　in　the　absence　of　any　record；　he　put　the　date　of　this　conscious　rapture　too　late　rather　than　too　early。　Certainly　my　own　impregnation　with　the　obscurely…defined　but　keenly…felt　loveliness　of　the　open　sea　dates　from　the　first　week　of　my　ninth　year。

The　village；　on　the　outskirts　of　which　we　had　taken　up　our　abode；　was　built　parallel　to　the　cliff　line　above　the　shore；　but　half　a　mile　inland。　For　a　long　time　after　the　date　I　have　now　reached；　no　other　form　of　natural　scenery　than　the　sea　had　any　effect　upon　me　at　all。　The　tors　of　the　distant　moor　might　be　drawn　in　deep　blue　against　the　pallor　of　our　morning　or　our　evening　sky；　but　I　never　looked　at　them。　It　was　the　Sea；　always　the　sea；　nothing　but　the　sea。　From　our　house；　or　from　the　field　at　the　back　of　our　house；　or　from　any　part　of　the　village　itself；　there　was　no　appearance　to　suggest　that　there　could　lie　anything　in　an　easterly　direction　to　break　the　infinitude　of　red　ploughed　fields。　But　on　that　earliest　morning；　how　my　heart　remembers　we　hastened；Miss　Marks；　the　maid；　and　I　between　them；　along　a　couple　of　high…walled　lanes；　when　suddenly；　far　below　us；　in　an　immense　arc　of　light；　there　stretched　the　enormous　plain　of　waters。　We　had　but　to　cross　a　step　or　two　of　downs；　when　the　hollow　sides　of　the　great　limestone　cove　yawned　at　our　feet；　descending；　like　a　broken　cup；　down；　down　to　the　moon　of　snow…　white　shingle　and　the　expanse　of　blue…green　sea。

In　these　twentieth…century　days；　a　careful　municipality　has　studded　the　down　with　rustic　seats　and　has　shut　its　dangers　out　with　railings；　has　cut　a　winding　carriage…drive　round　the　curves　of　the　cove　down　to　the　shore；　and　has　planted　sausage…laurels　at　intervals　in　clearings　made　for　that　aesthetic　purpose。　When　last　I　saw　the　place；　thus　smartened　and　secured；　with　its　hair　in　curl…papers　and　its　feet　in　patent…leathers；　I　turned　from　it　in　anger　and　disgust；　and　could　almost　have　wept。　I　suppose　that　to　those　who　knew　it　in　no　other　guise；　it　may　still　have　beauty。　No　parish　councils；　beneficent　and　shrewd；　can　obscure　the　lustre　of　the　waters　or　compress　the　vastness　of　the　sky。　But　what　man　could　do　to　make　wild　beauty　ineffectual；　tame　and　empty；　has　amply　been　performed　at　Oddicombe。

Very　different　was　it　fifty　years　ago；　in　its　uncouth　majesty。　No　road；　save　the　merest　goat…path；　led　down　its　concave　wilderness；　in　which　loose　furze…bushes　and　untrimmed　brambles　wantoned　into　the　likeness　of　trees；　each　draped　in　audacious　tissue　of　wild　clematis。　Through　this　fantastic　maze　the　traveller　wound　his　way；　led　by　little　other　clue　than　by　the　instinct　of　descent。　For　me；　as　a　child；　it　meant　the　labour　of　a　long；　an　endless　morning；　to　descend　to　the　snow…white　pebbles；　to　sport　at　the　edge　of　the　cold；　sharp　sea；　and　then　to　climb　up　home　again；　slipping　in　the　sticky　red　mud；　clutching　at　the　smooth　boughs　of　the　wild　ash；　toiling；　toiling　upwards　into　flat　land　out　of　that　hollow　world　of　rocks。

On　the　first　occasion　I　recollect；　our　Cockney　housemaid；　enthusiastic　young　creature　that　she　was；　flung　herself　down　upon　her　knees；　and　drank　of　the　salt　waters。　Miss　Marks；　more　instructed　in　phenomena；　refrained；　but　I；　although　I　was　perfectly　aware　what　the　taste　would　be；　insisted　on　sipping　a　few　drops　from　the　palm　of　my　hand。　This　was　a　slight　recurrence　of　what　I　have　called　my　'natural　magic'　practices；　which　had　passed　into　the　background　of　my　mind；　but　had　not　quite　disappeared。　I　recollect　that　I　thought　I　might　secure　some　power　of　walking　on　the　sea；　if　I　drank　of　ita　perfectly　irrational　movement　of　mind；　like　those　of　savages。

My　great　desire　was　to　walk　out　over　the　sea　as　far　as　I　could；　and　then　lie　flat　on　it；　face　downwards；　and　peer　into　the　depths。　I　was　tormented　with　this　ambition；　and；　like　many　grown…　up　people；　was　so　fully　occupied　by　these　vain　and　ridiculous　desires　that　I　neglected　the　actual　natural　pleasures　around　me。　The　idea　was　not　quite　so　demented　as　it　may　seem；　because　we　were　in　the　habit　of　singing；　as　well　as　reading；　of　those　enraptured　beings　who　spend　their　days　in　'flinging　down　their　golden　crowns　upon　the　jasper　sea'。　Why；　I　argued；　should　I　not　be　able　to　fling　down　my　straw　hat　upon　the　tides　of　Oddicombe？　And；　without　question；　a　majestic　scene　upon　the　Lake　of　Gennesaret　had　also　inflamed　my　fancy。　Of　all　these　things；　of　course；　I　was　careful　to　speak　to　no　one。

It　was　not　with　Miss　Marks；　however；　but　with　my　Father；　that　I　became　accustomed　to　make　the　laborious　and　exquisite　journeys　down　to　the　sea　and　back　again。　His　work　as　a　naturalist　eventually　took　him；　laden　wi