the half-brothers-第3节

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me　at　once。　　I　was　on　the　point　of　crying；　and　only　very　shame　seemed

to　keep　it　down。　　To　save　myself　from　shedding　tears；　I　shouted

terrible；　wild　shouts　for　bare　life　they　were。　　I　turned　sick　as　I

paused　to　listen；　no　answering　sound　came　but　the　unfeeling　echoes。

Only　the　noiseless；　pitiless　snow　kept　falling　thicker；　thicker

faster；　faster！　　I　was　growing　numb　and　sleepy。　　I　tried　to　move

about；　but　I　dared　not　go　far；　for　fear　of　the　precipices　which；　I

knew；　abounded　in　certain　places　on　the　Fells。　　Now　and　then；　I　stood

still　and　shouted　again；　but　my　voice　was　getting　choked　with　tears；

as　I　thought　of　the　desolate　helpless　death　I　was　to　die；　and　how

little　they　at　home；　sitting　round　the　warm；　red；　bright　fire；　wotted

what　was　become　of　me；and　how　my　poor　father　would　grieve　for　me

it　would　surely　kill　himit　would　break　his　heart；　poor　old　man！

Aunt　Fanny　toowas　this　to　be　the　end　of　all　her　cares　for　me？　　I

began　to　review　my　life　in　a　strange　kind　of　vivid　dream；　in　which

the　various　scenes　of　my　few　boyish　years　passed　before　me　like

visions。　　In　a　pang　of　agony；　caused　by　such　remembrance　of　my　short

life；　I　gathered　up　my　strength　and　called　out　once　more；　a　long；

despairing；　wailing　cry；　to　which　I　had　no　hope　of　obtaining　any

answer；　save　from　the　echoes　around；　dulled　as　the　sound　might　be　by

the　thickened　air。　　To　my　surprise　I　heard　a　cryalmost　as　long；　as

wild　as　mineso　wild　that　it　seemed　unearthly；　and　I　almost　thought

it　must　be　the　voice　of　some　of　the　mocking　spirits　of　the　Fells；

about　whom　I　had　heard　so　many　tales。　　My　heart　suddenly　began　to

beat　fast　and　loud。　　I　could　not　reply　for　a　minute　or　two。　　I　nearly

fancied　I　had　lost　the　power　of　utterance。　　Just　at　this　moment　a　dog

barked。　　Was　it　Lassie's　barkmy　brother's　collie？an　ugly　enough

brute；　with　a　white；　ill…looking　face；　that　my　father　always　kicked

whenever　he　saw　it；　partly　for　its　own　demerits；　partly　because　it

belonged　to　my　brother。　　On　such　occasions；　Gregory　would　whistle

Lassie　away；　and　go　off　and　sit　with　her　in　some　outhouse。　　My　father

had　once　or　twice　been　ashamed　of　himself；　when　the　poor　collie　had

yowled　out　with　the　suddenness　of　the　pain；　and　had　relieved　himself

of　his　self…reproach　by　blaming　my　brother；　who；　he　said；　had　no

notion　of　training　a　dog；　and　was　enough　to　ruin　any　collie　in

Christendom　with　his　stupid　way　of　allowing　them　to　lie　by　the

kitchen　fire。　　To　all　which　Gregory　would　answer　nothing；　nor　even

seem　to　hear；　but　go　on　looking　absent　and　moody。



Yes！　there　again！　　It　was　Lassie's　bark！　　Now　or　never！　　I　lifted　up

my　voice　and　shouted　〃Lassie！　Lassie！　for　God's　sake；　Lassie！〃

Another　moment；　and　the　great　white…faced　Lassie　was　curving　and

gambolling　with　delight　round　my　feet　and　legs；　looking；　however；　up

in　my　face　with　her　intelligent；　apprehensive　eyes；　as　if　fearing

lest　I　might　greet　her　with　a　blow；　as　I　had　done　oftentimes　before。

But　I　cried　with　gladness；　as　I　stooped　down　and　patted　her。　　My　mind

was　sharing　in　my　body's　weakness；　and　I　could　not　reason；　but　I　knew

that　help　was　at　hand。　　A　gray　figure　came　more　and　more　distinctly

out　of　the　thick；　close…pressing　darkness。　　It　was　Gregory　wrapped　in

his　maud。



〃Oh；　Gregory！〃　said　I；　and　I　fell　upon　his　neck；　unable　to　speak

another　word。　　He　never　spoke　much；　and　made　me　no　answer　for　some

little　time。　　Then　he　told　me　we　must　move；　we　must　walk　for　the　dear

lifewe　must　find　our　road　home；　if　possible；　but　we　must　move；　or

we　should　be　frozen　to　death。



〃Don't　you　know　the　way　home？〃　asked　I。



〃I　thought　I　did　when　I　set　out；　but　I　am　doubtful　now。　　The　snow

blinds　me；　and　I　am　feared　that　in　moving　about　just　now；　I　have　lost

the　right　gait　homewards。〃



He　had　his　shepherd's　staff　with　him；　and　by　dint　of　plunging　it

before　us　at　every　step　we　tookclinging　close　to　each　other；　we

went　on　safely　enough；　as　far　as　not　falling　down　any　of　the　steep

rocks；　but　it　was　slow；　dreary　work。　　My　brother；　I　saw；　was　more

guided　by　Lassie　and　the　way　she　took　than　anything　else；　trusting　to

her　instinct。　　It　was　too　dark　to　see　far　before　us；　but　he　called

her　back　continually；　and　noted　from　what　quarter　she　returned；　and

shaped　our　slow　steps　accordingly。　　But　the　tedious　motion　scarcely

kept　my　very　blood　from　freezing。　　Every　bone；　every　fibre　in　my　body

seemed　first　to　ache；　and　then　to　swell；　and　then　to　turn　numb　with

the　intense　cold。　　My　brother　bore　it　better　than　I；　from　having　been

more　out　upon　the　hills。　　He　did　not　speak；　except　to　call　Lassie。　　I

strove　to　be　brave；　and　not　complain；　but　now　I　felt　the　deadly　fatal

sleep　stealing　over　me。



〃I　can　go　no　farther；〃　I　said；　in　a　drowsy　tone。　　I　remember　I

suddenly　became　dogged　and　resolved。　　Sleep　I　would；　were　it　only　for

five　minutes。　　If　death　were　to　be　the　consequence；　sleep　I　would。

Gregory　stood　still。　　I　suppose；　he　recognized　the　peculiar　phase　of

suffering　to　which　I　had　been　brought　by　the　cold。



〃It　is　of　no　use；〃　said　he；　as　if　to　himself。　　〃We　are　no　nearer　home

than　we　were　when　we　started；　as　far　as　I　can　tell。　　Our　only　chance

is　in　Lassie。　　Here！　roll　thee　in　my　maud；　lad；　and　lay　thee　down　on

this　sheltered　side　of　this　bit　of　rock。　　Creep　close　under　it；　lad；

and　I'll　lie　by　thee；　and　strive　to　keep　the　warmth　in　us。　　Stay！

hast　gotten　aught　about　thee　they'll　know　at　home？〃



I　felt　him　unkind　thus　to　keep　me　from　slumber；　but　on　his　repeating

the　question；　I　pulled　out　my　pocket…handkerchief；　of　some　showy

pattern；　which　Aunt　Fanny　had　hemmed　for　meGregory　took　it；　and

tied　it　round　Lassie's　neck。



〃Hie　thee；　Lassie；　hie　thee　home！〃　　And　the　white…faced　ill…favoured

brute　was　off　like　a　shot　in　the　darkness。　　Now　I　might　lie　downnow

I　might　sleep。　　In　my　drowsy　stupor　I　felt　that　I　was　being　tenderly

covered　up　by　my　brother；　but　what　with　I　neither　knew　nor　caredI

was　too　dull；　too　selfish；　too　numb　to　think　and　reason；　or　I　might

have　known　that　in　that　bleak　bare　place　there　was　nought　to　wrap　me

in；　save　what　was　taken　off　another。　　I　was　glad　enough　when　he

ceased　his　cares　and　lay　down　by　me。　　I　took　his　hand。



〃Thou　canst　not　remember；　lad；　how　we　lay　together　thus　by　our　dying

mother。　　She　put　thy　small；　wee　hand　in　mineI　reckon　she　sees　us

now；　and　belike　we　shall　soon　be　with　her。　　Anyhow；　God's　will　be

done。〃



〃Dear　Gregory；〃　I　muttered；　and　crept　nearer　to　him　for　warmth。　　He

was　talking　still；　and　again　about　our　mother；　when　I　fell　asleep。

In　an　instantor　so　it　seemedthere　were　many　voices　about　memany

faces　hovering　round　methe　sweet　luxury　of　warmth　was　stealing　into

every　part　of　me。　　I　was　in　my　own　little　bed　at　home。　　I　am　thankful

to　say；　my　first　word　was　〃Gregory？〃



A　look　passed　from　one　to　anothermy　father's　stern　old　face　strove

in　vain　to　keep　its　sternness；　his　mouth　quivered；　his　eyes　filled

slowly　with　unwonted　tears。



〃I　would　have　given　him　half　my　landI　would　have　blessed　him　as　my

son；oh　God！　　I　would　have　knelt　at　his　feet；　and　asked　him　to

forgive　my　hardness　of　heart。〃



I　heard　no　more。　　A　whirl　came　through　my　brain；　catching　me　back　to

death。



I　came　slowly　to　my　consciousness；　weeks　afterwards。　　My　father's

hair　was　white　when　I　recovered；　and　his　hands　shook　as　he　looked

into　my　face。



We　spoke　no　more　of　Gregory。　　We　could　not　speak　of　him；　but　he　was

strangely　in　our　thoughts。　　Lassie　came　and　went　with　never　a　word　of

blame；　nay；　my　father　would　try　to　stroke　her；　but　she　shrank　away；

and　he；　as　if　reproved　by　the　poor　dumb　beast；　would　sigh；　and　be

silent　and　abstracted　for　a　time。



Aunt　Fannyalways　a　talkertold　me　all。　　How；　on　that　fatal　night；

my　father；irritated　by　my　prolonged　absence；　and　probably　more

anxious　than　he　cared　to　show；　had　been　fierce　and　imperious；　even

beyond　his　wont；　to　Gregory；　had　upbraided　him　with　his　father's

poverty；　his　own　stupidity　which　made　his　services　good　for　nothing

for　so；　in　spite　of　the　old　shepherd；　my　father　always　chose　to

consider　them。　　At　last；　Gregory　had　risen　up；　and　whistled　Lassie

out　with　himpoor　Lassie；　crouching　underneath　his　chair　for　fear　of

a　kick　or　a　blow。　　Some　time　before；　there　had　been　some　talk　between

my　father　and　my　aunt　respecting　my　return；　and　when　aunt　Fanny　told

me　all　this；　she　said　she　fancied　that　Gregory　might　have　noticed　the

coming　storm；　and　gone　out　silently　to　meet　me。　　Three　hours

afterwards；　when　all　were　running　about　in　wild　alarm；　not　knowing

whither　to　go　in　search　of　menot　even　missing　Gregory；　or　heeding

his　absence；　poor　fellowpoor；　poor　fellow！Lassie　came　home；　with

my　handkerchief　tied　round　her　neck。　　They　knew　and　understood；　and

the　whole　strength　of　the　farm　was　turned　out　to　follow　her；　with

wraps；　and　blankets；　and　brandy；　and　every　thing　that　could　be

thought　of。　　I　lay　in　chilly　sleep；　but　still　alive；　beneath　the　rock

that　Lassie　guided　them　to。　　I　was　covered　ove