chiaasen.stormyweather-第8节
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Max Lamb said; as respectfully as possible: 〃It looked pretty bad to me。〃
〃You hungry?〃 The kidnapper brought a burlap sack to the tree where his prisoner was tied。
〃Oh God;〃 said Max Lamb; staring inside the bag。 〃You can't be serious。〃
CHAPTER FOUR
Filling the BarcaLounger like a stuffed tuna; Tony Torres encouraged Edie Marsh and Snapper to reveal the details of their aborted scam。 Facing a loaded shotgun; they plied。
Snapper gestured sourly toward Edie; who said: 〃Simple。 I fake a fall in your driveway。 My 'brother' here threatens to sue。 You freak out and offer us money。〃
〃Because you guys know;〃 Tony said; slapping a mosquito on his blubbery neck; 〃I'll be getting quite a wad of dough on account of the hurricane。 Insurance dough。〃
〃Exactly;〃 Edie Marsh said。 〃Your place is wrecked; last thing you need is a lawsuit。 So Snapper says here's an idea: Soon as your hurricane money es in; cut us a piece and we call it even。〃
Tony Torres sucked his teeth in amusement。 〃How big a piece; darling?〃
〃Whatever we could take you for。〃
〃Ah;〃 said Tony。
〃We figured you'd just factor us in the insurance claim。 Jack up your losses by a few grand; who'd ever know?〃
〃Beautiful;〃 Tony said。
〃Oh yeah;〃 said Snapper; 〃fucking genius。 Look how good it worked。〃
He and Edie sat with their backs to the living…room wall; Snapper with his long legs drawn up; Edie's straight out; kneecaps pressed together。 A picture of innocence; Tony Torres thought。 The runs in her stockings were a nifty touch。
The carpet was sodden from the storm; but Edie Marsh didn't plain。 Snapper felt the wetness creeping through the seat of his dress trousers…the annoyance was sufficient that he might kill Tony Torres; if the opportunity presented itself。
Deep in thought; the salesman slurped at a sweaty bottle of imported beer。 He'd offered his captives a quart of warm Gatorade; which they'd refused without ment。 A humid breeze blew through the fractures in the walls and rocked the bare sixty…watt bulb on its beam。 Edie Marsh tilted her head and saw a spray of stars where Tony's ceiling had once been。 The noise from the portable generator gave Snapper an oppressive headache。
Eventually; Tony Torres said: 〃You understand there's no law to speak of。 The world's upside down; for the time being。〃
〃You could kill us and get clean away with it。 That's what you mean;〃 Snapper said。
Edie looked at him。 〃You're a tremendous help。〃
Tony indicated that he preferred not to shoot them。 〃But here's my thinking;〃 he said。 〃Tomorrow; maybe the day after; somebody from Midwest Casualty will e see about the house。 I expect he'll say it's a total loss; unless he's blind as a bat。 Anyway; the good news: I happen to own the place free and clear。 Paid it off last March。〃 Tony paused to stifle a burp。 〃I was having a good run at the office; so what the hell。 I paid the mortgage off。〃
Edie Marsh said: 〃Salesman of the Year。〃 She had noticed the plaque。
〃Mister;〃 Snapper interjected; 〃you got somethin' I can put under my ass? The rug's all wet。 A newspaper maybe?〃
〃Oh; I think you'll live;〃 said the salesman。 〃Anyhow; since the bank don't own the house; all the insurance es to me。 As I say; there's the good news。 The bad news is; half belongs to my wife。 Her name's on the deed。〃
Snapper asked where she was。 Tony Torres said she'd run off three months ago with a parapsychology professor from the university。 He said they'd gotten into crystal healing and moved to Eugene; Oregon。
〃In a VW van!〃 he scoffed。 〃But she'll be back for her cut。 Of that there's no doubt。 Neria will return。 See where I'm headed?〃
〃Yeah;〃 said Snapper。 〃You want us to kill your wife。〃
〃Jesus; what a one…track mind you got。 No; I don't want you to kill my wife。〃 The salesman appealed to Edie Marsh。 〃You get it; don't you? Before they cut a check; the insurance pany is gonna need both signatures。 Me and the missus。 And I also believe the adjuster might want to chat face…to…face。 What'd you say your name was?〃
〃Edie。〃
〃OK; Edie; you wanna be an actress here's your chance。 When the man from Midwest Casualty shows up; you be Neria Torres。 My loving wife。〃 Tony smirked at the notion。 〃Well?〃
Edie Marsh asked what was in it for her; and Tony Torres said ten grand。 Edie said she'd have to think about it; which took about one one…hundredth of a second。 She needed money。
〃What about me?〃 Snapper asked。
Tony said; 〃I always wanted a bodyguard。〃
Snapper grunted skeptically。 〃How much?〃
〃Ten for you; too。 It's more than fair。〃
Snapper admitted it was。 〃Why;〃 he asked; with a trace of scorn; 〃do you need a bodyguard?〃
〃Some customers got really pissed off at me。 It's a long boring story。〃
Edie Marsh said; 〃How pissed off?〃
〃I don't intend to find out;〃 said Tony Torres。 〃Once I get the check; I'm gone。〃
〃Where?〃
〃None a your damn business。〃
Middle America was what Tony had in mind。 A handsome two…story house with a porch and a fireplace; on three…quarters of an acre outside Tulsa。 What appealed to Tony about Middle America was the absence of hurricanes。 There were tornadoes galore; but nobody expected any man…made structure (least of all; a trailer home) to withstand the terrible force of a tornado。 Nobody would blame a person if the double…wides he sold blew to pieces; because that was the celestial nature of tornadoes。 Tony Torres figured he would be safe from disgruntled customers in Tulsa。
Snapper said; 〃I'm gonna be a bodyguard; I'll need my gun。〃
Tony smiled。 〃No you won't。 That face of yours is enough to scare the piss out of most mortal men。 Which is perfect; because the people who're mad at me; they don't actually need to be shot。 They just need to be scared。 See where I'm headed?〃
He took a length of bathroom pipe and smashed Snapper's pistol to pieces。
Edie Marsh said; 〃I've got a question; too。〃
〃Well; bless your heart。〃
〃What happens if your wife shows up?〃
〃We got probably six; seven days of breathing room;〃 Tony Torres said。 〃However long it takes to drive that old van back from Oregon。 See; Neria won't fly。 She's terrified of planes。〃
Snapper remarked that money was known to make a person drive faster than usual; or overe a fear of flying。 Tony said he wasn't worried。 〃The radio said State Farm and Allstate are writing settlements already。 Midwest won't be far behind…see; no pany wants to look stingy in a national disaster。〃
Edie asked Tony Torres if he intended to hold them prisoner。 He gave a great slobbering laugh and said hell; no; they could vamoose anytime they pleased。 Edie stood and announced she was returning to the motel。 Snapper rose warily; never taking his eyes off the shotgun。
He said to Tony: 〃Why are you doing this? Lettin' us walk out of here。〃
〃Because you'll be back;〃 the salesman said。 〃You most certainly will。 I can see it in your eyes。〃
〃Really?〃 Edie said; tartly。
〃Really; darling。 It's what I do for a living。 Read people。〃 The Naugahyde hissed as Tony Torres hoisted himself up from the BarcaLounger。 〃I need to take a leak;〃 he declared。 Then; with a hoot: 〃I'm sure you can find your way out!〃
On the slow drive back to Pembroke Pines; Edie Marsh and Snapper mulled the options。 Both of them were broke。 Both recognized the post…hurricane turmoil as a golden opportunity。 Both agreed that ten thousand dollars was a good week's work。
〃Trouble is;〃 Edie said; 〃I don't trust that asshole。 What is it he sells?〃
〃Trailer homes。〃
〃Good Lord。〃
〃Then let's walk away;〃 Snapper said; without conviction。 〃Try the slip…and…fall on somebody else。〃
Edie contemplated the ugly; self…inflicted scratch on her arm。 Posing under a pile of lumber had been more unfortable than she'd anticipated。 She wasn't eager to try it again。
〃I'll coast with this jerkoff a day or two;〃 she told Snapper。 〃You do what you want。〃
Snapper configured his crooked jaws into the semblance of a grin。 〃I know what you're thinkin'。 I ain't no salesman; but I can read you just the same。 You're thinkin' they's more than ten grand in this deal; you play it right。 If we play it right。〃
〃Why not。〃 Edie Marsh pressed her cheek against the cool glass of the car's window。 〃It's about time my luck should change。〃
〃Our luck;〃 Snapper said; both hands tight on the wheel。
Augustine helped Bonnie Lamb search for her husband until nightfall。 They failed to locate Max; but along the way they came upon an escaped male rhesus。 It was up in a grapefruit tree; hurling unripened fruit at passing humans。 Augustine shot the animal with a tranquilizer dart; and it toppled like a marionette。 Augustine was dismayed to discover; stapled in one of its ears; a tag identifying it as property of the University of Miami。
He had captured somebody else's fugitive monkey。
〃What now?〃 asked Bonnie Lamb; reasonably。 She reached out to pet the stunned animal; then changed her mind。 The rhesus studied her through dopey; half…clo