chiaasen.stormyweather-第11节

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　used　natural　disasters　as　a　cover　to　flee　their　wives。　Precious　manpower　and　resources　were　wasted　tracking　them　to　the　apartments；　condominiums　and　houseboats　of　their　respective　mistresses。　Consequently；　post…hurricane　reports　of　missing　spouses　were　now　received　with　chilly　skepticism。
　
　Bonnie　Lamb　said；　〃For　God's　sake；　we　just　got　married。　Max　wouldn't　take　off　on　a　stunt　like　that。〃　Augustine　shrugged。　〃People　get　cold　feet。〃　She　leaned　across　the　kitchen　table　and　took　a　swing　at　him。　Augustine　blocked　the　punch　with　a　forearm。　He　told　Mrs。　Lamb　to　settle　down。　Her　cheeks　were　flushed　and　her　eyes　shone。
　
　Augustine　said；　〃I　meant　we　can't　rule　out　anything。〃
　
　〃But　you　heard　that　man　on　the　answering　machine！〃
　
　〃Yeah；　and　I'm　wondering　why　a　serious　kidnapper　would　be　such　a　smartass。　'Don't　flatter　yourself；　Max。'　And　then　the　guy　gets　on　the　line　and　says；　'I　love　you；　Bonnie。'　Just　to　needle　your　husband；　see？　Make　him　feel　like　shit。〃　Augustine　poured　more　coffee　for　both　of　them。　He　said；　〃There's　something　damn　strange　about　it。　That's　all　I'm　saying。〃
　
　Bonnie　Lamb　had　to　agree。　〃To　leave　his　voice　all　over　a　telephone　tape…〃
　
　〃Exactly。　The　guy's　either　incredibly　stupid；　or　he's　got　brass　balls…〃
　
　〃Or　he　just　doesn't　care；〃　Bonnie　said。
　
　〃You　picked　up　on　that；　too。〃
　
　〃It's　scary。〃
　
　Augustine　said；　〃I'm　not　so　sure。〃
　
　〃Don't　start　again。　Max　is　not　faking　this！〃
　
　〃That　stuff　about　having　you　call　Pete　at　Rodale；　the　Bronco　billboard…was　he　talking　in　code　or　what？　Because　some　maniac　kidnaps　me；　the　last　thing　I'm　worried　about　is　keeping　up　with　my　ad　accounts。　What　I'm　worried　about　is　saving　my　hide。〃
　
　Bonnie　looked　away。　〃You　don't　know　Max；　what　a　workaholic　he　is。〃
　
　Augustine　pushed　back　from　the　table。　Normally　he　wasn't　wild　about　women　who　punched　for　no　good　reason。
　
　〃What　do　we　do　now？〃　She　held　the　cup　with　both　hands；　shaking　slightly。　〃You　heard　the　man's　tone。〃
　
　〃Yeah；　I　did。〃
　
　〃Let's　agree　he's　not　your　average　kidnapper。　What　is　he？〃
　
　Augustine　shook　his　head。　〃How　would　I　know；　Mrs。　Lamb？〃
　
　〃It's　Bonnie。〃　She　stood　up；　perfectly　calm　now；　tightening　the　sash　on　the　robe　he'd　loaned　her。　〃Maybe　together　we　can　figure　him　out。〃
　
　Augustine　emptied　his　coffee　in　the　sink。　〃I　think　we　both　need　some　sleep。〃
　
　On　the　way　back　to　Tony　Torres's　house；　Edie　Marsh　asked　Snapper　if　he　had　a　stopwatch。
　
　〃Why？〃
　
　〃Because　I　want　to　put　a　clock　on　this　jerk；〃　she　said；　〃see　how　long　it　takes　before　he　tries　to　screw　me。〃
　
　Snapper；　who　had　daydreamed　of　doing　the　same　thing；　said：　〃I　give　him　two　days　before　he　makes　a　move。
　
　〃I　give　him　two　hours；〃　Edie　said。　〃So　what'll　you　do？　Ten　grand's　ten　grand。〃　Edie　said；　〃You　better　be　joking。　I'd　shove　hot　daggers　in　my　eyes　before　I'd　let　that　pig　touch　me。〃　It　was　a　long　bleak　slide　from　dating　a　Kennedy　to　fucking　a　mobile…home　salesman。
　
　〃What　if　he　don't　let　up？〃　asked　Snapper。
　
　〃Then　I　walk。〃
　
　〃Yeah；　but…〃
　
　〃Hey；〃　Edie　said；　〃you　want　the　money　so　bad；　you　fuck　him；　OK？　I　think　the　two　of　you'd　make　a　very　cute　couple。〃
　
　Snapper　didn't　press　the　issue。　He'd　already　hatched　a　backup　plan；　in　case　the　Torres　deal　fell　apart。　Avila　was　in　a　happy　mood　when　he'd　called　the　motel。　Apparently　the　santeria　saints　had　informed　him　he　could　bee　very　rich　by　starting　his　own　roofing　business。　The　saints　had　pointed　out　that　the　hurricane　left　two　hundred　thousand　people　without　shelter；　and　that　many　of　these　poor　folks　were　so　desperate　to　get　their　houses　repaired　that　they　wouldn't　think　of　asking　to　see　a　valid　contractor's　license；　which　of　course　Avila　did　not　possess。
　
　〃But　you're　afraid　of　heights；〃　Snapper　had　reminded　him。
　
　〃That's　where　you　e　in；〃　Avila　had　said。　〃I'm　the　boss；　you're　the　foreman。　All　we　need　is　a　crew。〃
　
　〃Meaning　you　won't　be　joining　us　up　on　the　roof　with　the　boiling　tar　in　the　hot　sun。〃
　
　〃Jesus；　Snap；　somebody's　got　to　handle　the　paperwork。　Somebody's　got　to　write　up　the　contracts。〃
　
　Snapper　had　inquired　about　the　split。　Avila　said　guys　he　knew　were　charging　fifteen　grand　per　roof；　a　third　of　it　up　front。　He　said　some　home　owners　were　offering　cash；　to　speed　the　job。　Avila　said　there　was　enough　work　around　to　keep　them　busy　for　two　years。
　
　〃Thanks　to　you；〃　Snapper　had　said。
　
　Avila　failed　to　see　irony　in　the　fact　that　corruptly　inpetent　building　inspections　were　a　chief　reason　that　so　many　roofs　had　blown　off　in　the　storm；　and　that　so　much　new　business　was　now　available　for　inpetent　roofers。
　
　〃You　guys　plan　it　this　way？〃　Snapper　had　asked。
　
　〃Plan　what？〃
　
　Snapper　didn't　trust　Avila　as　far　as　he　could　spit；　but　the　roofing　option　was　something　to　consider　if　Torres　went　sour。
　
　The　trailer　salesman　also　happened　to　be　in　sunny　spirits　when　Snapper　and　Edie　Marsh　arrived。　He　was　sprawled；　shirtless；　in　a　chaise　on　the　front　lawn。　He　wore　Bermuda　shorts　and　monogrammed　socks　pulled　high　on　his　hairy　shins。　The　barrel　of　the　shotgun　poked　out　from　a　stack　of　newspapers　on　his　lap。　When　Edie　Marsh　and　Snapper　got　out　of　the　car；　Tony　clapped　his　hands　and　exclaimed：　〃I　knew　you'd　be　back！〃
　
　〃A　regular　Nostradamus；〃　said　Edie。　〃Is　the　electricity　up　yet？　We　picked　up　some　stuff　for　the　refrigerator。〃
　
　Tony　reported　that　the　power　remained　off；　and　the　portable　generator　had　run　out　of　gas　overnight。　He　was　storing　food　in　two　large　Igloo　coolers；　packed　with　ice　he'd　purchased　from　gougers　for　twenty　dollars　a　bag。　The　good　news：　Telephone　service　had　been　restored。
　
　〃And　I　got　through　immediately　to　Midwest　Casualty；〃　Tony　said。　〃They're　sending　an　adjuster　today　or　tomorrow。〃
　
　Edie　thought：　Too　good　to　be　true。　〃So　we　wait？〃
　
　〃We　wait；〃　Tony　said。　〃And　remember；　it's　Neria。　N…e…r…i…a。　Middle　initial；　G　as　in　Gomez。　What'd　you　buy？〃
　
　〃Tuna　sandwiches；〃　Snapper　replied；　〃cheese；　eggs；　ice　cream；　Diet　Sprite　and　stale　fucking　Lorna　Doones。
　
　There　wasn't　much　to　choose　from。〃　He　iced　the　groceries；　found　a　pool　chair　and　took　a　position　upwind　of　the　sweaty　Tony　Torres。　The　sky　had　cleared　and　the　summer　sun　blazed　down；　but　it　was　pointless　to　look　for　shade。　There　wasn't　any；　all　the　trees　in　Turtle　Meadow　were　leveled。
　
　Tony　plimented　Edie　Marsh　for　costuming　herself　as　an　authentic　housewife…jeans；　white　Keds；　a　baggy　blouse　with　the　sleeves　turned　up。　His　only　plaint　was　the　sea…green　scarf　in　her　hair。　He　said；　〃Silk　is　a　little　much；　considering　the　circumstances。〃
　
　〃Because　it　clashes　with　those　gorgeous　Bermudas　of　yours？〃　Edie　glared　at　Tony　Torres　as　if　he　were　a　maggot　on　a　wedding　cake。　She　was　disinclined　to　remove　the　scarf；　which　was　one　of　her　favorites。　She　had　boosted　it　from　a　Lord　&　Taylor's　in　Palm　Beach。
　
　〃Suit　yourself；〃　said　Tony。　〃Point　is；　details　are　damn　important。　It's　the　little　things　people　notice。〃
　
　〃I'll　try　and　keep　that　in　mind。〃
　
　Snapper　said；　〃Hey；　Mister　Salesman　of　the　Year；　can　we　run　the　TV　off　that　generator？〃
　
　Tony　said　sure；　if　they　only　had　some　gasoline。
　
　Snapper　tapped　his　wristwatch　and　said；　〃Sally　Jessy　es　on　in　twenty　minutes。　Men　who　seduce　their　daughter…in…law's　mother…in…law。〃
　
　〃No　shit？　We　could　siphon　your　car。〃　Tony　pointed　at　the　rubble　of　his　garage。　〃There's　a　hose　in　there　someplace。〃
　
　Snapper　went　to　find　it。　Edie　Marsh　said　it　was　a　lousy　idea　to　siphon　fuel　from　the　car；　since　they　might　be　needing　speedy　transportation。　Snapper　winked　and　told　her　not　to　worry。　Off　he　went；　ambling　down　the　street；　the　garden　hose　coiled　on　his　left　shoulder。
　
　Edie　expropriated　the　pool　chair。　Tony　Torres　perked　up。　〃Scoot　closer；　darling。〃
　
　〃Wonderful；〃　she　said；　under　her　breath。
　
　The　salesman　fanned　himself　with　the　Miami　Herald　sports　pages。　He　said；　〃It　just　now　hit　me：　Men　who　steal　their　daughter…in…law's　mother…in…law。　That's　pretty　funny！　He　don't　look　like　a　edian；　your　partner；　but　that's　a　good　one。〃
　
　〃Oh；　he's　full　of　surprises。〃　Edie　leaned　back　and　closed　her　eyes。　The　sunshine　felt　good　on　her　face。
　
　The　hurricane　had　transformed　the　trailer　court　into　a　sprawling　aluminum　junkyard。　Ira　Jackson　found　Lot　17　because　of　the　bright　yellow　tape；　that　police　had　roped　around　the　remains　of　the　double…wide　mobile　home　where　his　mother；　Beatrice；　had　died。　After　identifying　her　body　at　the　morgue；　Ira　Jackson　had　driven　directly　to　Suncoast　Leisure　Village；　to　see　for　himself。
　
　Not　one　trailer　had　made　it　through　the　storm。
　
　From　the　debris；　Ira　Jackson　pulled　his　mother's　Craftmatic　adjustable　bed。　The　mattress　was　curled　up　like　a　giant　taco　shell。　Ira　Jackson　crawled　inside　and　lay　down。
　
　He　recalled；　as　if　it　were　yesterday；　the　morning　he　and　his　mother　met　with　the　salesman　to　close　the　deal。　The　man's　name　was　Tony。　Tony　Torres。　He　was　fat；　gassy　and　balding；　yet　extremely　self…assured。　Beatrice　Jackson　had　been　impressed　with　his　pitch。
　
　〃Mister　Torres　says　it's　built　to　go　through　a　hurricane。〃
　
　〃I　find　that　hard　to　believe；　Momma。〃
　
　〃Oh　yes；　Mister　Jackson；　your　mother's　right。　Our　prefabricated