rasalvatore.attackoftheclones-第34节

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　Padme　listened　attentively；　captivated　by　Anakin's　flair　for　storytelling。　She　wanted　to　do　more；　though。　She　wanted　to　talk　about　what　had　happened　out　at　the　meadow；　to　try　to　make　some　sense　of　it　with　Anakin；　to　share　with　him　the　solution　as　they　had　shared　the　out…of…bounds　emotions　and　moments。　But　she　could　not　begin；　and　so　she　just　allowed　him　to　ramble　on；　contenting　herself　with　enjoying　his　tales。
　
　Dessert　was　Padme's　favorite；　yellow…and…cream…colored　shuura　fruit；　juicy　and　sweet。　She　grinned　as　Nandi　put　a　bowl　before　her。
　〃And　when　I　went　to　them；　we　went　into。。。〃　Anakin　paused；　drawing　Padme's　full　attention；　a　wry　smile　on　his　face。　〃Aggressive　negotiations；〃　he　finished；　and　then　he　thanked　Teckla　as　she　placed　some　dessert　fruit　before　him。
　〃Aggressive　negotiations？　What's　that？〃
　〃Uh；　well；　negotiations　with　a　lightsaber；〃　the　Padawan　said；　still　grinning　wryly。
　〃Oh；〃　Padme　said　with　a　laugh；　and　she　eagerly　went　for　her　dessert；　stabbing　with　her　fork。
　
　The　shuura　moved　and　her　fork　hit　the　plate。　A　bit　confused；　Padme　stabbed　at　it　again。
　
　It　moved。
　
　She　looked　up　at　Anakin；　a　bit　confused　and　embarrassed；　but　then　she　saw　that　he　was　fighting　hard　not　to　laugh；　staring　down　at　his　own　plate　a　bit　too　innocently。
　〃You　did　that！〃
　
　He　looked　up；　his　expression　wide…eyed。　〃What？〃
　
　Padme　scowled；　pointing　her　fork　at　him　and　waving　it　threateningly。　Then；　suddenly；　she　went　for　the　shuura　again。
　
　But　Anakin　was　quicker。　The　fruit　slipped　out　of　the　way；　and　she　stabbed　the　plate。　Then；　before　she　could　scowl　at　him　again；　the　shuura　rose　into　the　air　to　hover　before　her。
　〃That！〃　Padme　answered。　〃Now　stop　it！〃　She　couldn't　hold　her　feigned　anger；　though；　and　laughed　aloud　as　she　finished。　Anakin　started　laughing；　too。　Half　looking　at　him；　Padme　snapped　her　hand　at　the　floating　fruit。　He　waggled　his　fingers　and　the　fruit　looped　about　her　hand。
　〃Anakin！〃
　〃If　Master　Obi…Wan　was　here；　he'd　be　very　grumpy；〃　the　Padawan　admitted。　He　pulled　back　his　hand；　and　the　shuura　flew　across　the　table　to　his　waiting　grasp。　〃But　he's　not　here；〃　he　added；　cutting　the　fruit　into　several　slices。　Reaching　for　the　Force；　he　made　one　piece　float　upward　and　slide　toward　Padme。　She　bit　it　right　out　of　the　air。
　
　Padme　laughed　and　so　did　Anakin。　They　finished　their　dessert　with　many　fleeting　glances；　and　then；　as　Teckla　and　Nandi　returned　to　clean　up　the　plates；　the　couple　retreated　to　the　sitting　area；　with　its　fortable　chairs　and　sofa；　and　a　huge　warm　fire　blazing　in　the　hearth。
　
　Nandi　and　Teckla　finished　and　bade　the　couple　good…bye；　and　then　they　were　alone；　pletely　alone；　and　the　tension　returned　almost　immediately。　She　wanted　him　to　kiss　her；　so　desperately；　and　it　was　precisely　that　out…　of…control　sensation　that　had　stopped　her　cold。　This　was　not　right…she　knew　that　in　her　head；　despite　what　her　heart　might　be　telling　her。　They　each　had　bigger　responsibilities　for　the　time　being；　she　had　to　deal　with　the　continuing　split　of　the　Republic；　and　he　had　to　continue　his　Jedi　training。　Anakin　settled　back　into　the　sofa。　〃From　the　moment　I　met　you；　all　those　years　ago；　a　day　hasn't　gone　by　when　I　haven't　thought　of　you。〃　His　voice　was　husky；　intense；　and　the　sparkle　in　his　eyes　bored　right　through　her。　〃And　now　that　I'm　with　you　again；　I'm　in　agony。　The　closer　I　get　to　you；　the　worse　it　gets。　The　thought　of　not　being　with　you　makes　my　stomach　turn　over；　my　mouth　go　dry。　I　feel　dizzy！　I　can't　breathe！　I'm　haunted　by　the　kiss　you　never　should　have　given　me。　My　heart　is　beating；　hoping　that　kiss　will　not　bee　a　scar。〃
　
　Padme's　hand　slowly　dropped　to　her　side　and　she　sat　listening　in　amazement　at　how　honestly　he　was　opening　up　before　her；　baring　his　heart　though　he　knew　she　might　tear　it　asunder　with　a　single　word。　She　was　honored　by　the　thought；　and　truly　touched。　And　afraid。
　〃You　are　in　my　very　soul；　tormenting　me；〃　Anakin　went　on；　not　a　bit　of　falseness　in　his　tone。　This　was　no　ploy　to　garner　any　physical　favors；　this　was　honest　and　straightforward；　refreshingly　so　to　the　woman　who　had　spent　most　of　her　life　being　attended　by　handmaidens　whose　job　it　was　to　please　and　entertaining　dignitaries　whose　agendas　were　never　quite　what　they　seemed。
　〃What　can　I　do？〃　he　asked　softly。　〃I　will　do　anything　you　ask。〃　Padme　looked　away；　overwhelmed；　finding　security　in　the　distracting　dance　of　the　flames　in　the　hearth。　Several　moments　of　silence　slipped　by　unfortably。
　〃If　you　are　suffering　as　much　as　I　am；　tell　me；〃　Anakin　prompted。　Padme　turned　on　him；　her　own　frustrations　bubbling　over。　〃I　can't！〃　She　sat　back　and　struggled　to　collect　herself。　〃We　can't；〃　she　said　as　calmly　as　she　could。　〃It's　just　not　possible。〃
　〃Anything's　possible；〃　Anakin　replied；　leaning　forward。　〃Padme；　please　listen…〃
　〃You　listen；〃　she　scolded。　Somehow；　hearing　her　own　denial　brought　some　strength　to　her…much…needed　strength。　〃We　live　in　a　real　world。　e　back　to　it；　Anakin。　You're　studying　to　bee　a　Jedi　Knight。　I'm　a　Senator。　If　you　follow　your　thoughts　through　to　conclusion；　they　will　take　us　to　a　place　we　cannot　go　。。。　regardless　of　the　way　we　feel　about　each　other。〃
　〃Then　you　do　feel　something！〃
　
　Padme　swallowed　hard。　〃Jedi　aren't　allowed　to　marry；〃　she　pointed　out；　needing　to　deflect　attention　away　from　her　feelings　at　that　debilitating　moment。　〃You'd　be　expelled　from　the　Order。　I　will　not　let　you　give　up　your　future　for　me。〃
　〃You're　asking　me　to　be　rational；〃　Anakin　replied　without　the　slightest　hesitation；　and　his　confidence　and　boldness　here　caught　Padme　a　bit　by　surprise。　There　was　no　longer　anything　of　the　child　in　the　man　before　her。
　
　She　felt　her　control　slip　a　notch。
　〃That　is　something　I　know　I　cannot　do；〃　he　went　on。　〃Believe　me；　I　wish　I　could　wish　my　feelings　away。　But　I　can't。〃
　〃I　am　not　going　to　give　in　to　this；〃　she　said　with　all　the　conviction　she　could　muster。　She　finished　with　her　jaw　clenched　very　tightly；　knowing　that　she　had　to　be　the　strong　one　here；　for　Anakin's　sake　more　than　for　her　own。
　〃I　have　more　important　things　to　do　than　fall　in　love。〃
　
　He　turned　away；　looking　wounded；　and　she　winced。　He　stared　into　the　fire；　his　face　twisting　this　way　and　that　as　he　tried　to　sort　through　it　all。　She　knew　he　was　trying　to　find　a　way　around　her　resolve。
　〃It　wouldn't　have　to　be　that　way；〃　he　said　at　length。　〃We　could　keep　it　a　secret。〃
　〃Then　we'd　be　living　a　lie…one　we　couldn't　keep　up　even　if　we　wanted　to。　My　sister　saw　it；　so　did　my　mother。　I　couldn't　do　that。　Could　you；　Anakin？　Could　you　live　like　that？〃
　
　He　stared　at　her　intensely　for　a　moment；　then　looked　back　to　the　fire；　seeming　defeated。
　〃No；　you're　right；〃　he　finally　admitted。　〃It　would　destroy　us。〃
　
　Padme　looked　from　Anakin　to　the　fire。　Which　would　destroy　her…destroy　them…　she　had　to　wonder。　The　action　or　the　thought？
　
　Chapter　Sixteen
　
　〃Wow！〃　Boba　Fett　exclaimed；　rushing　across　the　landing　pad　to　view　the　sleek　starfighter　up　close。
　〃Beautiful　ship；〃　Jango　agreed；　strolling　to　catch　up　to　his　son；　studying　the　craft　with　every　stride。　He　noted　the　markings　and　design；　the　extra　firepower；　and；　particularly；　the　astromech　droid　hardwired　into　the　left　wing；　tootling　happily。
　〃This　is　a　Delta…Seven；〃　the　excited　Boba　announced；　pointing　out　the　rear…　cockpit　position。　Jango　nodded；　glad　that　his　son　had　been　taking　his　lessons　seriously。　These　were　new　ships…　so　new　that　they　hadn't　yet　been　fitted　with　hyperdrive　engines；　Jango　realized；　and　he　inadvertently　glanced　up　at　the　cloudy　sky；　wondering　if　parent　ships　were　up　there。　He　shook　the　thought　away；　turning　back　to　Boba。
　〃And　what　of　the　droid？〃　he　asked。　〃Can　you　identify　the　unit？〃　Boba　climbed　up　the　side　of　the　fighter　and　studied　the　markings　for　a　moment；　then　turned　back　to　his　father；　finger　to　pursed　lips；　an　intense　expression　on　his　face。　〃It's　an　Arfour…Pea；〃　he　said。　〃And　is　that　a　mon　droid　for　this　type　of　starfighter？〃
　〃No；〃　Boba　answered　without　hesitation。　〃A　Delta…Seven　pilot　would　usually　use　an　Arthree…Dee。　It's　better　at　keeping　the　guns　targeted；　and　the　fighter　is　so　maneuverable　that　handling　the　laser　cannons　is　tricky。　I　read　that　some　pilots　wind　up　shooting　their　own　nose　cones　off　in　this　fighter！　They　do　a　snap…roll；　ing　out　over　and　around；　but　they　haven't　pensated　the　manual　swivel。　。　。〃　As　he　spoke；　he　moved　his　arms　over　each　other　and　about；　tangling　them　up　in　front　of　him。
　
　Jango　was　hardly　listening　to　the　details；　though　he　was　thrilled　that　Boba　had　taken　to　his　lessons　with　such　energy。　〃Suppose　the　pilot　didn't　need　the　extra　gunnery　skills　of　an　Arthree…Dee？〃　he　asked。
　
　Boba　looked　at　him　curiously；　as　if　he　didn't　understand。
　〃Would　the　Arfour…Pea　then　be　a　better　choice？〃
　〃Yes；〃　came　the　halting　response。
　〃And　what　pilot　wouldn't　need　the　extra　droid　gunnery　skills？〃　Boba　stared　blankly；　but　then　a　smile　spread　on　his　face。　〃You！〃　he　blurted；　seeming　quite　pleased　with　himself。
　
　Jango　took　the　pliment　with　an　appreciative　smile…and　it　was　true　enough。　Jango　could　wheel　any　fighter；　and　if　he　ever　had　the　opportunity　to　fly　in　a　Delta…7；　he'd　likely　choose　an　R4…P　over　the　R3…D。　But　that　wasn't　what　he　had　in